sorry I was rambling. What I meant to say was that I guess if we had not started a relationship until after I was less heavy, I would always have resented him for it. Maybe its better to start fresh with someone else...I know its hard ):

I dated one of my closest friends o an and off for 10 years. Unfortunately, it never worked out even though we were in love because we were going to college in different cities and he didn't want to be bothered with distance. We had an agreement that we would get married when I turn 35 and both of our careers are started as long as I didn't have any kids. Well, I want at least 3 children, so I decided it was in my best interest to forget about him and just date other men. Now, I've been dating a guy I've known for 12 years for the last year. We're engaged but with no ring, and I'm happier than I've been with anybody else. What I'm trying to say is that there are other guys out there who might be better for you than this guy you're talking about even though you are extremely interested in him and have known him for years. If he was texting some other girl when he was out with you and he's never said anything about being with you, try dating somebody else.

I read all the responses but I kind of have to sympathize with the guy for a moment. Maybe he always liked you but you never made a move. If you guys had been friends for that long maybe he was scared to make a move because he thought YOU just looked at him like a friend. And, now your flirty and he's noticed that maybe you like him. So, maybe it's not the weight loss at all. CONFIDENCE is sexy and that's what you've got now. You feel better about yourself so you feel more confident and able to flirt with him so now he knows that you like him. Did he ever comment in a negative way about your weight before. He could have been texting other girls to see what you would do. I know it's lame of him but most guys, especially at that age, aren't very bright when it comes to girls. However, if none of what I said is really how it is, then let him eat his heart out! Good Luck with it!

It's really up to you and if you can accept him liking you. If you're always going to have that "he only likes me because I lost weight" in your head, then that will be a recurring issue in your relationship. But if you can let that idea go and believe that maybe it's just taken time for him to get to know you well enough, or maybe he's attracted to your new-found confidence, then things might work.

As many have said (and I mentioned before) confidence is a HUGE factor in attracting men, and could very well be responsible for his change of heart. The guy that I mentioned in my earlier post had told me on several occassions that I needed more confidence, and that I was single because I was always tearing myself down. And well, he's probably right. I notice guys only hit on me on nights when I'm in a good mood/feeling good about myself.

I totally agree. I read your posts and I think maybe since you were so self-conscious of your weight you may not have been exuding confidence and being flirty. Maybe he had a hint that you were interested but never really knew for sure. Or maybe he knew but was scared if you refused then he would ruin a great friendship. About the texting...I really think since you weren't officially on a date or together and were just hangin out as friends he probably thought it didn't matter (even though it was rude of him to do this). Or maybe...he was texting to see if he should make a move on you? Getting advice? Honestly, you never know what was going on in his mind. My advice?


TALK TO HIM!!!!

He obviously isn't someone you just hooked up with. He's a good friend you have spent a lot of time with. Talk to him about your feelings and see if he'll open up to you. Most girls our age are scared to do this and if you had just met him I wouldn't say this but him being a good friend I really suggest this!

Hope it works out good for you!