Originally Posted by tkm256 (Post 2912827)

First issue: the age
My boyfriend has the same problem as you do: he's 20, but doesn't look a day older than 15 after a hair cut :D He's so self-conscious about it that he has refused to touch a razor for months because those little whispies on his chin make him look older. I certainly didn't shy away from him because of his looks...I thought he was cute as a button. Of course, I work at a university where orientation staff routinely accost me with pamphlets because they think I'm an incoming freshman. Looking younger than you are isn't that uncommon.

Second issue: the weight
When I met the aforementioned boyfriend, he was 5'6 and about 120 lbs; I was 5'2 and 145 lbs. I didn't give a darn--actually I was really flattered that someone in better shape than I was took an interest in me. He's now a little heavier than me, but our dynamic hasn't changed a bit. Seriously, if a girl turns you down because she doesn't want to feel threatened by a thinner mate, she isn't worth it.

Originally Posted by benchmarkman (Post 2913270)

Thanks for the reply but all those facts are for AFTER you got to know him. People don't even give me the chance to get to know them so they never know I'm more than 15 years old.

Originally Posted by Ivy1534 (Post 2914249)

I have a question. Why is it that after someone posts something, you put it down? Meaning, when someone gives you advice or a personal story, you say "no, it wont work", or "it hasn't worked", or "it doesn't apply." I am curious as to what you would like us to say if you don't want advice or stories?

Originally Posted by Ivy1534 (Post 2915834)

I understand your frustration, and we are trying to help you. I didn't mean that you were putting the person down, I meant you were putting the ideas down (which is the natural thing to do when they don't work or haven't worked in the past). Everyone is different so what works for one person may not work for another. No, I don't want you to lie, in fact, that is a very bad idea in any situation (it is worth noting here: I have a radical honesty policy so much so that sometimes I come off as rude - not intended, it just happens), but you could let the person know that instead of saying things like, "no, that doesn't work" or "no, that is not the problem"... Let us know you don't wear body washes and such. We are just trying to help you.

Although this is going to sound like a stupid question, I feel like I have to ask it... Do you use antiperspirant or the like? The reason I ask is I know quite a few men who don't and some women find that a really big turn off and you said you don't use scented body sprays and washes, so I just felt like I had to ask.

Another thing is you mentioned acne (no matter how slight), have you tried using a concealer? I know that some men use it to cover up blemishes and even out skin tones. I don't know if that is something you would be interested in, but it may be worth a shot if that bothers you a lot.

Also, sometimes it is all in the way you approach the person (this does not really apply to the clerk you mentioned - I really don't know what her problem was). Normally if you approach the person with a smile, your head up, and your hands either at your side or in your pockets it shows you are harmless and open to talking. Confidence goes a LONG way with most women.

I am sorry if I came off as rude. I am and was taken aback by what you were and are saying to some of the posts. I really hope we can help you find out what is going on.

Originally Posted by SavingServo (Post 2912519)

And I'm sure maintaining a 5 o' clock shadow wouldn't hurt anything.

Originally Posted by Ivy1534 (Post 2924011)

Um... I can only speak for myself on this but... uh... WTF?! I don't get it, I really don't. She seemed like a B*tch. I'm sorry, I don't mean to belittle you in anyway, I am thinking about it and, seriously? You are in the serving industry, even if you are not interested in the person SMILING at you, effing smile back! WTF? I am so sorry you had to deal with that.