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Originally Posted by Nash
Ack
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"Ack" is right!! That pretty much sums it up, I'd say.
It really just sucks, and I wish it weren't happening to us, and I'm afraid of not beating it....but really, overall, I'm feeling pretty much like, "Alrighty, well, somebody's got to be on the bad side of the statistics, so I knew that going in." And also, plenty of really fine people have to battle it more than once in order to win the war. So, OK, I'm going to be in that group. I cry, I mourn, and I regroup. That's just the way it is.
On Monday they'll go in with a CT to guide them through a biopsy of the mass -- THAT, incidentally, seemed to make itself palpable and visible over my clavicle like freaking overnight!
-- and then we'll know for sure if we're gearing up to treat the right cancer. Gotta have the right juice for the malady, right? Then on Thursday I meet with my new onc -- the one who's treating me now that I've moved to Georgia, not the one who was treating me in Baltimore and ignored an active lymph node for months, discounting it as a "false positive." I'll also meet a radiation oncologist, who will talk me through my new course of treatment. I went through 6 months of intense chemo last year, but no rads, so this is all new to me. I'm to expect it to be a walk in the park compared to the chemo, side effects-wise, so that's good. Any hair that comes within "the beam" will be lost and not begin to regrow for like 4-5 months, so I'm hoping the longer "over-hair" will cover the parts below that are most likely going to be lost at the nape.
Yeah, it sucks, and I hate that they're going to radiate my thyroid, since so many of us end up with hypothyroidism.
I get mad about different things, and the interruption of my weight loss is a biggie for me.
I have been trying so hard to repair the damage I did to myself, and it hurts to have circumstances not under my control keep tumbling in my path wreaking havoc on my best efforts. At least there are no steroids this time, so maybe I'll fall into the minority of folks who have their throats radiated who don't go on to experience hyprothyroidism.
Pray for THAT, will you, while you're praying I beat the cancer??
Ok, tantrum over. I have many blessings, not the least of which is the amazing support which exists here in this very special corner of the weight loss world. You guys are amazing, and what I said over on my blog is that you all are a "warm blanket on a cold night," and I really mean it.
Thank you so, so much. Lorraine and I are in a lot of pain over this, and your support means everything.
: are going out to you.
replapse, but I just have to have a temper tantrum and say,
