What she said. *pointing at Tammy* I read your post and just couldn't help but I think you responded beautifully.
Quote:
Originally Posted by Tammy32
Gretchen, by no means should you feel bad about what you feel. The conclusions you have come to have come from alot of thought and soul searching. It's understandable that not everyone is going to agree with what you feel, because we are all unique and look at the world differently. I am also making this a positive experience, and I am proud of myself, and I am so much happier than I have been in a long time. My husband calls me beautiful quite often and I would always reply, "I'm not". My self-confidence is so much better now that I can look at myself and see that I am Beautiful inside and out. This is a truly growing and positive experience. I'm the only one who can do this for me and if I woke up everyday hating this experience I would be dooming myself to fail. I will not fail, it is not an option. It takes alot of inner strength and discipline to lose weight, so I think that it is a huge accomplishment and one to be very happy about every step of the way.
The ugly fact. We can't snap our fingers and be thin. And anyways, what kind of lesson would we learn from that?? Not one that I will be teaching my kids anytime soon. Instant gratification!! Life is definately not that way.
I'm not trying to stir the pot. This is just what I feel, and I understand that we don't all think the same. I can see that this has gotten a little heated, but I don't think that is a bad thing at all. Not often do you get to see the depth of how people really feel and that is refreshing.
Gretchen, I just wanted to say that I loved your post, and am sorry that more don't share a positive approach to this challenge. I think Tammy made some brilliant points also, particularly when she referred said, "If I woke every day hating this experience I would be dooming myself to fail." Your embrace of the positive in this experience clearly is one of the keys to your success, so I don't really get knocking it -- even if you can't imagine sharing it.
Everything is a choice. You can choose to be positive, and you can choose to be negative. Each one of us here has made choices along the way -- choices for which we alone are responsible -- and these choices led to our weight problems. Everybody here shares that in common, as well as a desire to lose the weight and be healthier. I think it's pretty simple after that: you can feel positive about what the hard journey back can yield and teach you and look for the good in the experience, or you can feel like about the state you're in and be miserable, suffering every step of the way. I don't feel like a victim because I choose to eat cottage cheese or broiled fish instead of french fries and hamburgers, or make a point of logging my food every day and counting my calories, or make a conscious effort to hold myself accountable for doing my cardio or weights when I don't feel like it. I feel excited, and hopeful, and self-confident...and dare I say it, HAPPY because I'm doing something positive about the thing that I don't like, rather than simply disliking it. And I love hearing from like-minded, positive people about what works for them, what they've learned and applied to their programs, and how they're taking/regaining/maintaining control of their health.
Gretchen, I think you had a really great idea, sharing your positive philosophy and excitement, and it seems that a few of us here both share it and value your message. The folks that don't, well, I can't speak for them. I wish them well, and I wish for them a lifetime of happy, positive choices. You go, girl -- keep that positive energy coming! Gee, I wonder if it's had any impact on your success.....hmmmm.
Last edited by lessofsarahtolove; 06-10-2004 at 10:10 PM.
Wether you feel that way or not about your weight loss it's a great spin. I think we could all use some positive thinking to get us through this time in our life. So you go Gretchen. I know you are going to make it.
hmmmm, I feel like I should add more here....what to say. I am a VERY positive and optimistic person; I look for the good in everything. And I don't think that just because I am not grateful for my weight issues makes me any less positive or optimistic.
Gretchen, I want you to know that I feel absolutely NO ill towards you, and I don't think anyone else does either. None. I think you add a great deal to this site and I'm happy your here. And I think you do a great job encouraging others. I just don't happen to agree with you on this one topic. no big deal.
What a great discussion this has been. I think we all had some great points of view, even those that we don't agree with. I've always told people I will listen to everything they tell me. I don't have to agree with their opinion, but I will always respect it. And, respect is a huge factor in life. *group hug* everyone.
Whatever contributes to success is great and I agree that debate is healthy (as long as people don't become overly sensitive and defensive - case in point, I haven't seen any posts here asking Gretchen to apologize for her attitude, or anyone declaring themselves a victim for having to eat cottage cheese or saying there's anything negative whatsoever about the concept of losing weight).
I'll admit to being cynical about "counting my blessings" for inheriting my father's fat genes or for having emotional imbalances that lead to overeating. However, I've found my bitterness over my weight issues to be a great motivator to change my life. I've found only positives from adopting better eating habits, exercising more and losing a great amount of weight. I do not particularly enjoy the process by any means, but I consider it a necessary evil and take pride in striving to correct my self-destructive behaviour. I can't say I valued having the opportunity thrust upon me, although I do value greatly the many opportunities I've had to overcome obstacles and adversity not caused by my own gluttony. I AM a positive person and in that respect I am positive I will be successful in what I am realistic enough to consider a lifelong battle.
Yes, your spin is wonderful if it works for you Gretchen and I applaud your positive mindset and naturally support it.
Sandi I hope you or no one else took what I said as a negitive. I was not saying you are not a positive person or that you should agree with everything said here. I'm just saying wether we feel the way Gretchen does or not it's a great attitude to have and we can all use that.
Its interesting...When I first read these posts I thought everyone was a little nuts....Be grateful for being FAT??? NEVER! But then I got to think about it more. I remember my relationship with my body the only time in my life when I was thin and I hated my body. I thought I was fat when I was a size 6. Nothing anyone said would have convinced me otherwise. I didnt have healthy eating habits then either. Now I would be more than thrilled with that weight. When I gained all the weight I was going through a lot of emotional issues. The weight is just the symptom. It is forcing me to deal with all my issues. That is a good thing. Without the weight I may not be motivated to work on myself. This time I am feeling very positive with my weight loss. I dont feel angry or deprived. I feel like it is a challange. One I can win. It is the first time in my life that I have felt this way. I also feel that because of the weight I am more compassionate to others with weight issues. I am learning to eat healthy and to take care of myself. I know I never would have bothered to do that if I didnt have to. So am I greatful for this challenge? Yes I guess I am.
And Ive gotten to meet all of you which is a wonderful thing that I would have missed out on if I didnt have to loose the weight.
Its interesting...When I first read these posts I thought everyone was a little nuts....Be grateful for being FAT??? NEVER! But then I got to think about it more................So am I greatful for this challenge? Yes I guess I am.
Hey there, SnugasaPug -- first of all, this has to be said: I LOVE THAT DOG!!! Mine is an Italian Greyhound (like a miniature greyhound, if you've never seen one) but he's not purebred; he's a rescue, a mix of 3/4 Italian Greyhound, and - if you can believe it - 1/4 pug......so he got some of the great qualities of the pugs, but looks much, much more like an IG. Anyway, your little guy makes me literally laugh out loud and smile hugely every time I run across one of your posts! He's just too cute and he makes me happy! But I digress.......
I wanted to say that I really appreciated your post and completely agree (what a surprise! ) Like you, I sure wouldn't have picked the development of a weight problem, but it really is just a symptom, and now that I'm tackling it - and the reasons I developed it - with everything I've got, I too find that I really appreciate what both the weight and the process of losing it have forced me to learn.
By the way, I think you're cool, and I'm glad you're here!
Tammy said it!
I think you responded beautifully.
Gretchen I think you're great
about the state you're in and be miserable, suffering every step of the way. I don't feel like a victim because I choose to eat cottage cheese or broiled fish instead of french fries and hamburgers, or make a point of logging my food every day and counting my calories, or make a conscious effort to hold myself accountable for doing my cardio or weights when I don't feel like it. I feel excited, and hopeful, and self-confident...and dare I say it, HAPPY because I'm doing something positive about the thing that I don't like, rather than simply disliking it. And I love hearing from like-minded, positive people about what works for them, what they've learned and applied to their programs, and how they're taking/regaining/maintaining control of their health.
Mine is an Italian Greyhound (like a miniature greyhound, if you've never seen one) but he's not purebred; he's a rescue, a mix of 3/4 Italian Greyhound, and - if you can believe it - 1/4 pug......so he got some of the great qualities of the pugs, but looks much, much more like an IG. Anyway, your little guy makes me literally laugh out loud and smile hugely every time I run across one of your posts! He's just too cute and he makes me happy! But I digress....... 
