Hi all. Went to Spin class this morning. I love the instructor, she really makes it challenging. Then she'll say stuff like "how much resistance you add is up to you, depending on what you want to get out of the workout". That inspires me to really push. It is kind of a passive aggressive comment, but it works for me. Ha! On the office challenge, I was able to get the full 40 points yesterday. The first day, I missed on 5 points because I didn't get the full 7 hours of sleep. So, doing well. I went to the park after work because I was just too far away from the 10k steps I needed. There is a loop that is about .6 of a mile, so I went twice around it and made it to goal. It wasn't a run day, so I just walked. It really is a nice park, I might have to start running there instead of from my house. It probably would be a little safer. But then I have to change at work. Not my thing.

Laurie: You go! I know you can make it to the gym!!

Toasted: Hope you get to feeling better. It is no fun to have digestive issues!

Jessica88: I have kind of a different take on cheat days. I don't do specific cheat days because it throws me off and I tend to go way overboard. But my plan is counting calories, so if there is something special going on, I will plan my day so that I have room for whatever it is in my calorie goal. BUT! If I go over my limit occasionally, I don't worry about it. I just get back under goal the next day. It works better for me this way.

MissLoud: I'd love to offer advice on fashion, but I am not the right person for that. :) It sounds really pretty!!

Just stopping in to say I finished day 6 of 6 work days in a row. Omg am I tired. -_-

Hey guys. I got my run (W3D3) and post-run bootcamp workout done today. I ended up doing nothing but sipping peppermint tea last night so that was a bust. I feel better though.

Laurie, yay your case getting settled!!! Boo your boss using it as an excuse to dump last minute work on you. #ThePerilsOfBeingAwesome

Diane, yay 40 points and finding a new park though I agree the change at work situation is not ideal!

Jessica, it sounds like a hectic past few days. I hope you get days off now.

Alright guys, I just wanted to do a quick check in. Here's wishing everyone a successful on plan day!

Hi all. Went to Body Pump this morning. It was ok, but we had a substitute instructor. She wasn't one of my favorites. All she talked about was what she had "noticed" that was wrong. Whatever. If you want to talk to one person about their form, then do it. Otherwise, just shut up and teach the class. Guess I might be a little crabby today......

So, I did W3D2 of C25K last night. I just ran from my house, and it made me decide that it definitely is time to just go to the park. There really was a lot of traffic this time, so I am over that. You spend so much time thinking about the traffic, you miss out on your workout. My husband said that he would feel better about that too. Ok.... done deal.

Jessica: Glad you checked in!! Get some rest!

Toasted: Glad you are feeling better. Peppermint tea is good for the soul!!

When I was walking from the car to my office today - I thought my pants felt a little big - and this is the first day I'm wearing them. I would be great to go down a size - I have the next 2 sizes down in my closet!!!

I bought a package of 5 spin classes so I guess I'll be sticking to that for another couple of weeks. Planning to go today after work :)

Also - I got my Invisalign scans done this morning. I've heard of people losing weight during the process since it restricts your eating - here's hoping!

Happy Waitangi Day everyone!!! Lol long weekend for us and we are just about to go to a 4 year olds birthday party. I'm pleased its a fasting day as I'm better at not eating party food at all than just having a wee bit and stopping. The scales are finally complying and I'm back down to 234 this morning!

Just a quick check in to say hi and that I'm still on track!

Hey everyone, it's FRIDAY!! I'm soooo looking forward to the weekend! Anyway, I got up today (late) but I still went for my run. I think I'm a little tired because the last two runs have been more difficult than the first two earlier this week. Or maybe I'm just running faster now that I've gauged the easy-difficult ratio. I don't know. Anyway run done and then I did a yoga dvd afterwards because I'm super sore from yesterday's bootcamp/kettlebell workout. I got on the scale and got no joy today- maybe partly soreness or just general the "scale is a 'beech'"-ness but ah well... I feel like I'm beasting being on plan moore than I've been in 2 years and I'm not getting scale reinforcement... yet. It will come though, I know this, so I'm not quite swimming in the depths of despair (who else LOVED Anne of Green Gables??) yet or contemplating throwing myself into the offplan land of bonbons and pizza. It's going to be okay. Eventually. And if it doesn't there's always those inches I think I'm losing. I'm going to bust out the tape measure this weekend and see if there's progress in that dimension.

Diane: Peppermint tea IS good for the soul. I feel a lot better since drinking it. I'm glad you've found a safer running zone. Safety is the most important thing for sure!

Underwater: I had braces for years as a child but my compliance was terrible and now I fantasize about Invisalign. I'm want to do it someday particularly if it helps with restricting eating... How's spin going? Do you like it? Here's to being a smaller size!!!

Kelly: I had to google what Waitangi day was! Happy Waitangi day to you!! Yay long weekends!!

Alright everyone, I hope you guys have a wonderful and happy weekend.

Hi all. Kind of quiet on here this week. Hope everyone is doing well! I went to spin class this morning. It was a good workout, but this one woman next to me asked if I had ever had a "fitting" for the settings on the bike. I told her that it has been a long time, but I had an instructor help me with it. She then went on to tell me that she thought that my knees are a little too close to the handlebars. Ok....... wtf? I just turned away and ignored her. She is one who is not consistent in coming to class and I've never talked to her before, and THIS is what her first conversation is with me? Whatever. I think I'll listen to instructors over some random comments from a complete stranger. What a freak. How about... you do you and I'll do me????? Idiot.

I'll be changing after work and then heading to the park to do W3D3 of C25K. Looking forward to it. I went walking there yesterday and it was just a really nice time. The weather was good and it was fun.

Toasted: Sorry about the scale, but I do think that if you are sore, your body tends to hold onto water to help it heal. I may be wrong, but I would bet that's the case. Hang in there!

MissLoud: Happy Waitangi Day! Always good to have a long weekend!

Underwater: Nice! Gotta love it when clothes feel loose!

Just a quick check-in. I quickly skimmed. Gonna try to catch up this weekend.

First day at my new job. I broke my scale moratorium yesterday. I am back up over 200 - 202.8. Realized that I have been in the 189-206 range since August. Thinking about things. But one weigh-in is, of course, a terrible data point, especially because I did it after a carb binge. Again, just chilling for now. And grateful that I have not gained 40 pounds back, even if I'm just sort of doing long-term hovering, even after two weeks or so of beast mode.

Hey guys, I just wanted to do a quick check in because I'm struggling a little today to the extent that if I can just stay within maintenance calories, I'll call it a victory. I can't seem to stop eating and then because I haven't had any "real" food, I keep feeling like I haven't actually eaten. Add to that I'm currently workout-less for the day. I think I'm going to get out and go find something else to do other than eat like ride my bike or run.

Diane, I don't like know it all, gym police types either. Always with something to say about your diet or workout and it's like " I don't even know you, get away from me!" #Sigh Some people! I hope your run in the park went well!

Laurie: I'm sorry you're getting no scale love either in spite of beasting it. Maybe our bodies are in shock or something and we'll get major whooshes soon. How was the first day at the new job?

So my Fitbit died last weekend after less than 6 months and they'd replace it, but I don't live anywhere near a service center so basically I'm out of luck. I was going to live Fitbit-less but I've become somewhat obsessed with it. I like the reinforcement and the encouragement and the competition and now getting up and taking steps seems sooooo... pointless, even though obviously it isn't. Anyway I basically lasted 3 days before I ordered another one. #sigh It arrives on Monday. I'm at 1500ish calories for the day and it's about 5.30pm. If I can get a workout in and stay under 1800, I'll call today a win! I hope you guys are having a great on plan weekend and aren't struggling like I am. I need beast mode dust.

Hi all! Not great thoughts today for me either. It seems like a day of it. I went to the park last night for W3D3 of C25K. I had gotten off of work early (we do that on Fridays), and it was an incredibly nice day. So, I was looking forward to it. It went well up until the end. I had worn my tank top with a jacket. Well, I was way too hot and sweating like crazy. I just couldn't bring myself to taking off the jacket though with just the tank top. I'm sure it would have been fine, but I really think that with it being so much lighter than when I usually go, I was feeling really self-conscious. Then, on the last bit of running, I just didn't make it the entire time. I didn't walk long, but took about 15 seconds to walk. I felt really tired. So, now I'm not sure if I should move on to week 4. I don't know if I was just really tired, or if being so hot zapped my energy, or if I'm just not ready to move on. I think I'll try moving on to the next week, on Monday, and see how it goes. At least it will be slightly darker, without the full sun.

I have been pushing quite a bit all last week with this work challenge. I had pretty much been doing everything in the challenge anyway, but the 10,000 steps per day does require extra effort. I think it is really good to do, but I think it also wore me out. It might just be that way until I get used to it.

Anyway, fast forward to this morning's Body Flow class. Now, I know that this class is a challenge for me. The balance parts and some of the yoga moves are tough! I just wasn't in love with what I saw in the mirror. I tend to watch the mirror more in this class than any other, just trying to make sure I'm doing the right moves. I just wasn't thrilled. That carried over to going to the store to get some new sports bras and seeing myself partially naked in the mirror. Ugh.

I have to tell myself that I'm doing ok, and that the challenge is just another step in the process. I know that I'm better than where I was, but there is just soooooooo much left to do. Most of the time it is fine, a part of the process, but today it wasn't making me happy. I'll be fine, but just not today. :)

I will need to go walking later to get the steps in. That might help.

Toasted: Yep, I'm not a lot of help today!! Not a really positive post from me. I'm sorry about your fitbit, but I hope beast mode can find a way to get to you! It isn't with me today, so I can't share. Ha! Hang in there!!

Laurie: Hope the new job is going well. Don't be too unhappy with the scale. You have been focusing on exercise and getting fit. Sometimes it just doesn't translate well on the scale! Hope you hang in there too!

Had to check myself on binging on sweets again the other day. Like to the point that I bought an oreo milkshake, went to get gas, and forced myself to throw it away while I was pumping even though it was still 2/3rds full. I'm not a binger... not like this. I mean I binge on things like lettuce. Or those mini oranges. I think part of it might be the amount of fast food I've been eating recently. I need to switch back to organic tv dinners when don't have time to make a lunch for work. Even if their price has gone up.

But, honestly, I think it's a bit deeper than that. This time last year was really bad for me. The first few weeks of January 2014, I was crying myself to sleep because I knew that if my ex dropped me off at my dad's I'd never see him again. Which is a good thing, but at the time, it was still hard not because I wanted him but because I didn't want to be alone. Then there was supposed to be a huge party for my birthday and it seemed like everyone backed out. We still did something, but only because my dad said even if it was just him, my step-mother, and myself, we could still go bowling together. But that doesn't mean that I didn't feel insignificant and worthless. Not to mention after my birthday and the day before the party, I managed to see the messaging logs of my ex and between my birthday (the 12th) and through Valentine's day and the day of the party (the 16th) he was texting his now fiancee. Needless to say, not a particularly happy time.

I think with everything else I've got on my plate right now, the emotions from last year are fighting to the surface even though they're moot now. Because they are moot. I am happy. Not to say that I'm not stressed or that I don't worry - because I'm a worrier; it's pretty much what I do. But I'm content and happy. I have people who build me up, people who encourage me to be me and to do more, to do what I want to do. I don't know.

So, in other random news, getting quite a bit more back on my taxes than I was expecting. Especially since I wasn't expecting anything. I've got a lot to do still in regards to my bankruptcy, but it's moving forward - slow and steady. Lots of paperwork I have to dig up and put in order. Lots of confusing paperwork. Still waiting for a financial aid letter for Spring quarter from the school. I know that they have to evaluate it still and they only finished evaluating the transcripts recently, but still. Lots of anxiety there.

I was doing clothes, happened to be folding my brother and his fiancee's laundry and decided to try on a pair of her 13/14s. Learned that I need to go shopping and get a new pair of jeans. I got 14s for work but I'm still wearing size 16 jeans and... well... when I was in the 13/14s, all I could think was "Holy ****, when did my legs get so skinny!?"

So there's that.

Hey guys, so it seems like the weekend was kind of a bust for most of us! #LeSigh Thank God we made it through and have this week to pull ourselves together one day at a time. Today hasn't been the greatest plan-wise for me. First of all, my phone died and so my 3 get-up alarms didn't ring. Thank goodness for my emergency "get up now or face the consequences" secondary alarm which goes off at 7.50a.m. otherwise I might have slept right through work! As it was, I was late. And hungry. And it's a fast day. And I've binged on crackers so the fast day is kind of a bust. Not totally but not great because you know what? Crackers aren't filling so I'm still hungry- 357 out of 500 calories consumed. Green salad for me then! Anyway, enough whining. No one said this would be easy.

Diane: I'm sorry you had a rough weekend as well. We're always our own worst critics and I'm sure you look great and even more than that, you're fit and strong. It's funny how I can hear 700 compliments but the 1 bad one is the one that sticks. Or even more how the smaller I got, the more self-critical of my body I became. Our bodies are what they are right now but we're working on changing them and there's power in that and that's beautiful!

Jessica: Sorry about the tumultuous memories the weekend brought but you know what's awesome, other than getting tiny and getting a better than expected tax return (both pretty awesome btw!!!), you made it and you're better and happier than you were last year and that's a victory and an inspiration to anyone else who's crying themselves to sleep or struggling right now, that it it does get better. What a difference a year makes, girl!!!

Lyn: Yay checking in! I've been thinking about you and wondering how your move went. I think you're doing awesome finding the healthiest options for you given that you don't have access to your own food the next few weeks. I'm terrible at moving. Believe me, I'd be swimming in fast food making excuses right now, not finding the healthiest options at the hotel buffet. You're making the best of things you can and showing it can be done and I think that's great. It was a pretty bingey weekend (and Monday) for me too. Maybe we can get back on track together starting from the next food opportunity?

Okay guys, so I just wanted to rush to check in before I lost even more track of time. You guys help me stay accountable and my current mood is such that I NEED to be on here a lot or I could slip down a not-great food hole and not emerge for several pounds. I feel a little better and refreshed and a little more like I CAN do this, so let me round this off and get to living life. Or get back to work as the case may be. Have an awesome week my people!

Hi all! Doing better now. I don't know what happened on Friday afternoon into Saturday, but I moved on. I went to Spin this morning and did really well. It was a strength day, so low RPMs but that means higher resistance. It definitely was tough, but I think I did really well. Also had a good weigh in, and that always helps improve the mood! I was down 2 pounds this week. However, in the interest of full disclosure, that means I'm finally down to where I was before I took the break around Christmas. It seems to have taken forever to get that back off. I need to remember this for next Christmas, that I just can't let it go like that again.

I have decided to try to move on in C25K to W4D1. I think that Friday was more about being hot and tired than it was about not being able to finish. We'll see how it goes tonight after work. If it isn't good, then I'll re-evaluate.

Toasted: Oh boy, alarm issues are not a good way to start the day! Hope you just make it through today. Its too bad you can't ask for a restart!

Lyn77: Glad to see you post today! You are definitely going to have some challenges now. But, you'll make it!!

Hi all. Went to Body Pump this morning. It was a new release and boy it was a good one. My legs were all shaky after class. I have a feeling that tomorrow could be a little sore day. The upper body work was pretty intense.

I did W4D1 of C25K last night. It was such a nice evening and I really enjoyed it at the park. The sun was close to setting when I got there, but I had time to get in the workout before it was too dark. This one had a 3 minute run, then walk, then a 5 minute run. The program had you do it twice. I was really happy that I was able to make it. I don't remember the last time I could run/jog a full 5 minutes. I admit, I am sloooooow. But it felt really good last night.

Lyn77: Wow! Nice post! I think you hit all of your marks! It sounds like you have a pretty nice place to be. And good for you for getting in the 3+ miles of walking!