[DCHound]

You have gotten some great great advice here.

I have to add, the reason I think I'm succeeding way beyond my wildest dreams this time, far, far better than the last time I lost over 100 lbs, is ~ it has to happen in your head before it happens for real. I had to imagine myself as a normal happy healthy person at a healthy weight, really see it in my mind's eye, before I could totally commit to this radical lifestyle makeover. I saw it, but I wasn't sure ~ so I faked it. Then one success built upon another, and, here I am...totally succeeding. So can you. Hugs.

[Tummy Girl]

I have to second what DC said, the visualization is very helpful, I do mine in bed before I go to sleep, whether it is imagining myself at my healthy weight doing the normal life things, or preparing how I will handle difficult food situations ahead of time it all helps. When you hit those tough moments if you already rehearsed how you're going to handle it, it's easier than making it up on the spot. And another awesome benefit, I've started dreaming of myself as a thin person! I guess the brain's got it now.

[H8cake]

I love Glory's quote: Nothing happens until something moves. Wow, that really applies in my situation. I spent so many years looking at my friends who are a size 4 just like yours, and feeling so bad about myself. I hated my body and wallowed in self pity and that got me no where but heavier! Some of us just can't get away with eating recklessly and not exercising. Cfmamma is so right, eating the way she described is really loving your body. It feels so awesome to have a strong healthy body and the only way to get it is to move. Don't abuse yourself in your head, all that critical thinking just wears you down. Once you commit yourself to taking control of the situation you will feel so much better.

[rockinrobin]

Originally Posted by Kayhm0711

I just don't know what to do. How can I love myself and realize that I need to do this, not just for me but for my daughter because I wanna be here along time, that should be enough but it seems I always lose my way.

Why am I struggling with this so much?

I think you should ask yourself this - "are you interested in losing weight, or are you COMMITTED to losing weight?". Because when you're truly, truly committed many "pieces of the puzzle" start to fall into place. That's when you find/seek out/discover/devise a plan that works, that's when you make sure that you MAKE that plan work. That's when you are willing to do what is necessary.

I would dig down deep and decide what's it going to be. What is it that you want the MOST? The "food" or the weight loss - and all that it brings about - for starters - more peace and joy, better health, more energy and productivity, fabulous clothing, more confidence. And really - it's an EASIER life. It just is. I know for certain that once you "get into it" you will be thrilled beyond belief that you did and wonder why the heck you didn't do it sooner.

You won't care what your friends look like because you'll be the very best possible you - and that's the bottom line here. Being all that you can be. No more settling for second best. You deserve FIRST best. And it's there. It's yours for the taking. Take it. Go on and take it.

[Glory87]

Originally Posted by rockinrobin

What is it that you want the MOST? The "food" or the weight loss - and all that it brings about - for starters - more peace and joy, better health, more energy and productivity, fabulous clothing, more confidence.

Robin is wise!

You know, I've know lived both lives. A life where I was heavy and got to eat whatever I wanted and a life where I was thin and managed my food choices. The thin life definitely makes me happier.

Sure, food can taste good and it's easier to just go with the American fast food/convenience foods diet, but I wasn't a very happy person. I was heavy, lethargic, depressed and hated to look at myself. I spent a lot of wasted time dreaming about being thin.

On the other hand, it's hard work to live a life of mindful eating. It's more work to grocery shop, to cook, to pack lunches, to food journal to make healthy choices while traveling, to handle social situations with food. Unhealthy snacks are so much easier to get than a healthy snack. I spend a lot of time planning food - but at least that time is productive.

Now that I have lived both ways - there is no way I would ever go back to the me that ate big muffins for breakfast and pizza for lunch and yogurt pretzels for snack and Taco Bell for dinner.

I had to make the change and it was hard and it was a process to find a plan that worked for me (I made some changes as I went along), but now that I'm living this life, it's pretty easy. I have healthy habits, I have my favorite recipes, I have strategies for difficult food situations. And a closet full of adorable size 6 clothes