time2lose - you hit the nail on the head. I really wish I had learned many of those lessons before I turned 50!
Another one that I learned this time around - losing weight alone is infinitely harder than losing it in a supportive community! Many of the lessons I learned from the folk around here.
Maintenance wasn't even on my radar until I came to 3FC. And without the lessons I've learned from those folk, I don't think success would have been possible. The whole concept of lifestyle change was a "duh" moment for me.
Well, I'll be honest. Despite the fact that I hear people on The Biggest Loser and here on 3FC say "If I can do this, so can you" I don't alway believe this. I've been struggling for so very long and I haven't been able to make myself do what I need to do yet. So, I catch myself thinking that I might not be one of the lucky ones. Yeah, I know that luck doesn't have anything to do with it, but that's what happens in my head sometimes. Logically, I know these thoughts are false. But, sometimes, the negative voice in my head speaks louder than all of the others.
I'd say that desire to lose quickly was the #1 point of failure for me my entire life. Not because I was afraid of being stuck in limbo, but more just part of my general impatient I-want-it-now approach.
Oh, wow, this is an interesting thought! I have that I-want-it-now approach to many things in my life, too. I have it with regards to losing weight (well, I'm fighting it anyway) and I have also had it in the past with regards to certain foods like Doritos and cookies. Isn't it interesting that the feeling of "wanting it NOW" has caused me to fail at losing weight (because I wasn't going fast enough and I gave up), and the "wanting it NOW" has also caused me to gain weight because I want the immediate gratification of an entire bag of Doritos? Even if I know I'm going to feel like CRAP after I eat them?
Wow. You know, on Friday's, we have free donuts in the breakroom. I'm not even a donut person; don't really care for them. But for many months I got in the habit of rushing down with everyone else for my donut, even though every time I would feel sick from eating all that sugar and grease so early in the morning!
I'm happy to say that I'm now I'm off the donuts, but I can still smell them when I go into the break room and I sometimes still think, "hmmmm, donuts......"
I understand too. i know all of the rights and wrongs, and when it comes down to it, something always still gets in the way. i just keep telling myself that each minute is another chance and you have to take chances.
Thank you for all your kind comments on my post. I just came back to this thread and you all have made my day. This was a great question and really got me to thinking!
Rhonda,
I think we have all been there at one point or another but don't listen to that negative voice. You can do this!
CountingDown,
I am over 50 too! We are never too old to learn and make changes. That is, unless it is learning to program my cell phone!
Last edited by time2lose; 03-31-2009 at 11:28 AM.
Reason: additional thought
I am over 50 too! We are never too old to learn and make changes. That is, unless it is learning to program my cell phone!
Okay, yet another brilliant statement. Not quite 50 yet (45), but nonetheless - learning how to program my cell phone - I leave that up to my daughters.
But yes, we ARE never too old to change.
Rhonda, for what it's worth, I am one of "those" that truly, truly believes that any one and every one CAN lose weight, as it is a DOABLE thing. Every one is CAPABLE of it. It's not some hare-brained crazy scheme. But of course I have hindsight on my side. For many, many years I didn't believe it was possible for *me* to lose the weight either - until that one time. The LAST time. And then I was sure of it.
In the mean time, fake it till you make it.
Wait, wait, wait. Wait a sec. Rhonda, you HAVE lost weight. You've lost 30 lbs. You can lose 30 more. And then 30 more. Know it. Take confidence from it and when you're ready - you can and WILL do it.
I think that so much of what we're taught about dieting is false, that it can be very difficult for some people to lose weight. The "traditional" ways of dieting are ineffective for some people, and too much of the "anyone can do it," without going into what can work against you can mislead people into thinking they're crazy, lazy, stupid or otherwise defective because they can't seem to find success themselves.
I gave up on weight loss more than a decade ago because "diets" were only making me fatter. It wasn't until I decided to try methods that were unconventional (even controversial), and redefined success, that I start to make progress and lasting success. Changing my birth control, and following a low carb diet, dieting "backwards" (focusing on making healthy lifestyle changes that I'm willing to do forever, regardless of whether they result in weight loss - accepting weight loss as a possible reward for behavior, rather than the goal itself).
I'm finally learning that there is no one way or reason to lose weight. It isn't that all methods work equally well for all people - it's finding what works for you (and unfortunately sometimes you have to make your path rather than follow someone else's).
I'm finally learning that there is no one way or reason to lose weight. It isn't that all methods work equally well for all people - it's finding what works for you (and unfortunately sometimes you have to make your path rather than follow someone else's)
7000% agreed. We of course, without a doubt each have to find what works for ourselves.
And when we do find that way, we have to MAKE it work. And continue to make it work.
Because though I may have found "what works for me", the second I stop putting the effort into it that is required, the minute I stop MAKING it work - it won't. It's an ongoing process.
EDited to add: Though we each need to find what works for ourselves and that we need to each keep on making it work, that doesn't change my belief that weight loss IS doable for each and every one of us.
Last edited by rockinrobin; 03-31-2009 at 02:38 PM.
