Yes! I do enjoy reading about how different we all are in how we see food, how we eat and what we like and don't like.
I think that experimenting with different ways of eating to find out what works is the only way to go.
Quote:
Originally Posted by freelancemomma
I have happily joined those lineups on many occasions.
F.
My dad does this and to him, a large part of the enjoyment is the social aspect of getting together, trying out a restaurant or eating place deemed special through word-of-mouth.
Yet he's the most disciplined man I've ever known when it comes to eating in moderation. His weight has remained consistently a good healthy weight throughout the years (now in his early 70's) but he still enjoys eating and sampling new delights.
I have happily joined those lineups on many occasions.
F.
Hecccck yes, plus some of the cooking techniques require fancy equipment or days of aging etc that I can't do at home. Back in my old hometown when there was nothing but mcds and olive garden, sure homecooking is waaay better. But brooklyn old school brick oven pizza? Gourmet dough starter waffles? Fancy schmancy gelato? peking roast duck? char siu bao? My fam owned a Chinese restaurant and no matter what, there are some secret methods passed down from fam to fam members that are kept dead secret unless you're related to the chef. I like the process of cooking/baking, but I go for whatever I find tastiest - its cool whether its my cooking or eating out.
I enjoy counting cals and eating clean 99.9% the time tho =D (except for vacas, I still like mixing it up just very rarely) Its so fun, I'm a big list-maker type. I can can so into numbers, formulas - with everything, not in an anxious way, its just that I enjoy it so much whether its working with stats, making logic string, html coding and cal counting- that chillaxes me more than other less exacting ways of eating.
I'm trying to stick to a Mediterranean diet because that is my heritage and I believe it's a very healthy way to lose weight.
I don't believe that you have to give up everything you love to lose weight. Our biggest problem is large portions of food and lack of exercise.
yo you ma. I see where you are coming from but what rare andunknown says is true and she has a perfect right to say it. If people have a problem with the truth that's their problem.
But when i read her post i thought, ok so we all know this. If there's anyone out there who hasn't heard this truism yet, then where have you been hiding! Its one of those things that's so much easier said than done. So it just doesn't add anything new to the discussion. But that's really all that's wrong with it. I didn't feel dissed that she said and i don't think anyone really should. If we could all be moderate, none of us would be on this forum.
yo you ma. I see where you are coming from but what rare andunknown says is true and she has a perfect right to say it. If people have a problem with the truth that's their problem.
But when i read her post i thought, ok so we all know this. If there's anyone out there who hasn't heard this truism yet, then where have you been hiding! Its one of those things that's so much easier said than done. So it just doesn't add anything new to the discussion. But that's really all that's wrong with it. I didn't feel dissed that she said and i don't think anyone really should. If we could all be moderate, none of us would be on this forum.
"Moderation in everything" is not true for everyone. Many people who have struggled with moderation do so in part because of sayings like this. Some people have successful WOEs that exclude things and it's less supportive of them to be in an environment where people are telling them they shouldn't do that. You yourself exclude sweet desserts except under special circumstances. You probably weren't offended by what she said and I wasn't that worked up about it because, of course I've heard it a million times. Of course she has a right to say it, and I'm quite sure the poster did NOT intend to say something hurtful (and people have the right to say hurtful things intentionally or unintentionally, although the mods on this site have the right to edit or remove posts or even ban a poster in extreme cases). I particularly chose that post to comment on not because her comment was inflammatory, but because it *was* an innocuous thing to say, something that everyone says sometimes (including myself) and it still has the power to be hurtful.
So, I picked out that extremely borderline example to encourage everyone to continue to make the effort I have seen people make on this board to avoid making blanket statements. 3fc is a fantastic support group and despite that, sometimes feelings are hurt (almost always unintentionally here).
I really have noticed people making the effort on this board. There are boards where the effort is not necessary. If a board is buried in the carb counters forum or the IE boards, I think posters there should not need to make the big effort to be inclusive of other styles. But on a generic "weight loss support" board, I think the posters should try to avoid even accidentally dissing other styles of WOE.
I understand where you are coming from. I understood that before. I disagree. I think its taking sensitivity far too far.
I was on a forum not long ago and someone said they were offended by the use of the word skinny. Skinny is a perfectly acceptable word. I was pissed off that someone thought they could tell me not to use the word skinny. Its a generally accepted term, unlike certain other terms that i'm not even game to use on this site.
The problem is not those of us who say things like that. Its not like anyone is being abused. Its the over sensitivity of the person who feels offended by the word skinny or by the idea that they can't do moderation.
Yes i can't do moderation. I"m not offended by it. I think people who are offended by the notion have a problem that they should resolve. I do not think everyone should have to kittyfoot around the oversensitive person. I think that's taking things much too far.
The everything in moderation is a generalisation. There are always exceptions to generalisations. That doesn't make them less valid.
No one has been abused. I think a bit of perspective is a good idea.
... people who embrace restrictions sometimes say things that can be very hurtful to people who are attempting IE (who are probably in the small minority).
Nobody means to be hurtful to anyone else. Whatever WOE we follow most of us here know that if we were successful at being moderate we would probably not have a weight problem. The idea of being moderate is much like winning the lottery, you either scoff at wasting money playing the lottery or you buy a ticket every time.
But the bold statement stood out to me, not that I'm trying to preach the benefits of IE it's just that.... well don't you know anyone who eats whatever they want and doesn't have a weight problem? What about children who eat half a cookie and then run off to play? You say that people who practice IE are in a small minority but that's not really true, anyone who is not dieting, eating what they want, and remaining slim is actually eating intuitively.
The mediterranean diet is not a diet. It's my heritage too, I grew up there so I know what they eat. It's definitely possible to gain weight on the mediterranean diet if one is overeating.
One important thing to keep in mind is don't bash yourself over the head if moderation doesn't work for you (or conversely elimination). I wasted decades thinking moderation "should work".
It didn't for me. Now I can have whatever appetite wise (but I choose not to because I think some things are very bad for me). But not before I got my body fundamentally changes by eliminating things for a few months.
I know for me my body was in fat storage mode, my appetite was physically out of control and there was no, zero, zilch possibility of ever succeeding without addressing these fundamental physical processes by elimination for a few months. Then I could start reintroducing things if I wanted.
Or visa versa. If you give elimination a real go (I keep coming back to 2 to 3 months because I think anything less than not is not enough time, personally, to fully succeed) don't keep bashing your head over it, move on.
But if you are spending year after year or sometimes decade after decade and keep thinking if I just do this or that but keeping your approach fundamentally the same, well perhaps time to try something else. Even if that something else is "something I could never do".
Not in a million years did I think I could give up bread, and then all grains? No way. But I could and did. So keep an open mind.
