Fantastic post, Kaplods! I agree that in this post-industrial first world society we are encountering something that has never been experienced in human history - overabundance by all classes. No longer is obesity the status symbol of choice by the upper classes, it is available to all to our detriment while our biology expects immenent famine. And obtaining that indulgence is as simple as driving thru a fast food resturant where thousands of calories are available for mere dollars and no longer requires hours and even seasons of manual labor to obtain. And remember when such treats as fudge, cotton candy and funnel cakes were only available at the annual country fair or for special holidays- now they are available at the sporting concession stand year round even if you don't already own the appliances to make them at home daily in your resturant quality kitchen. Great points! Thanks for writing all that.
In my case it was a spiral into depression. I just stopped caring about much of anything, including my weight. Not caring = gaining.
me too... i've lost and regained prob 500 lbs over the course of my life.. i'd lose 70 gain 100, lose 60, gain 30, lose 10, gain 20 and so on and so on. i'd get soooo depressed where i would just stop caring about trying to fix it cause i felt like i was in way too deep, so why bother.
i'd also get so mad at myself because i knew how hard i worked and wouldn't want to work that hard again to re-lose the weight. it just became ahorrible cycle.
also being 30 and never having had a real boyfriend i would always think if i could be i'd have a guy. so i'd kill myself dieting down to like a size 8/10 and have a guy for a month or few weeks, then it would end and i'd be sitting home alone again. i'd say to myself, why am i bothering to diet and eat salad? so i can be thin in my pajamas on fri, sat and sun night alone as i'm watching lifetime movies? i thought no one likes me so i may as well eat, i'm alone anyway,i can hide out and eat.. i'll be no sadder than being thin and alone..
i've been good for about 3 months and wanna binge everyday so bad but i can't go back there.. and i'm scared i'll never really reach my goal, cuz everytime i get close i always wind up starting to gain some back until then i've gained it all back and then some..
I plan on going back to work next year. I think that will be a hard time for me b/c I won't have as much workout time and food prep time. If I gain some back I think that'll be why.
Whenever I start to look better and feel better I forget that I'm a fat girl inside and act like I can eat whatever I want. That's my problem. I know better now.
History: Never attempted to lose weight until the last time. Lost over 100 lbs. Gained pretty much all of it back. Starting over.
I lost the weight in a very healthy way. It wasn't a quick-fix diet. I'd made very lasting changes. I frequented 3FC. Made short & long-term goals. Accomplished many of them.
My problem came when I had an ENORMOUS change in my life. I moved to a different state. Knew no one. Cut off ties with other people. I was isolated. Became depressed. Couldn't see my way out of it.
I made attempts to start new activities, to go to different meetings in order to at least be a little sociable, but I found the same problem magnified in the new state. ... I'll never feel like I belong. Anywhere. I just never belong. My brain does not work the same way, and I will never, ever be able to just be.
Depression, loneliness... food... food that I'd had under control for -years- at this point turned back into a "comfort". I returned to binging, and laying like a lump on my sofa. Felt worthless. Had nothing to look forward to. Gave up. I realized it was a problem while it was happening, but I didn't want to deal with it. It was so much easier to just buy a bunch of junk and eat while losing myself in some dumb show or game.
I "put it aside" until I realized one day that I'd eaten my way pretty much back to my original starting weight.
I can't say what changed it back. I can't say what sparked my true acceptance that I'd reversed all of my original, positive changes... But this weight...this time... pure emotion. And every drop of sweat that pours from my skin is an emotion that I'd tried to bury with food at some point before.
I have a lot of work to do. I don't make excuses for it. I ****** up. If nothing else, I'm learning from it. If nothing else... I'm here now.
The poster who said you have to watch forever... Yes, I now believe this is true. Anyone who has been overweight or obese got there because they weren't watching! This part is simple! And when a formerly obese person is "done" with losing, they still have to maintain and know what they are doing with food
I agree completely. I, too, kept a 40-50 lb. loss off for two years and thought I would NEVER regain it, but here I sit, probably more than 50 lbs. overweight (too discouraged to weigh myself now). I'm restarting, but like you, I am now ready to face some truths about myself that I would rather not have faced. Here's the main truth I'm facing: I will NEVER be able to deal with food as a "normal" person (read, person who is thin without formal dieting) would. I will always have to "watch," but at this point, I am willing to do that.
There's a really good book called Nudge that discusses this. It's billed as a book on economics, but it's really about human behavior.
Humans make short-term decisions because we have difficulty truly grasping the long-term impact/decisions. Its very hard for us to make the decision we want to make (to eat right and not too much) because we have trouble truly connecting it with the long-term consequences. This is true for trying to quit smoking, wearing seatbelts, saving for retirement, etc etc.
There are other issues involved of course, but I'd definitely recommend this book for exploring more about human decision making and how we can more easily make the decisions we WANT to make but have trouble doing in the short-term.
Okay, sorry for the two posts in a row, but I wanted to comment on this because it is so insightful. Thanks for the recommendation. Two points: 1) years ago I read a fitness book written by an exercise guru called Joyce something-or-other (can't remember). Anyway, the book wasn't that great, but I do remember one point the author made about the temptation to skip exercise after making a committment to do it. She addressed that inner voice that says to us, "Just skip it this day. One day won't hurt." The author countered that by saying that she realized that skipping that one day WOULD hurt because it was already a sort-of betrayal of our own committment to ourselves and that one day often turns into skipping other days. Now, on the one hand, I do not believe that we need to strive for perfection, but I do think that we need to always consider how that one skipped day, that one extra helping, that one more bite DOES lead to re-gain.
2) Another book I read (and recommend) is called The Rules of Normal Eating. The author advocated something like intuitive eating, and she made the point that although she is now thin and has been for some time, she has accepted that she will never view food in the same way that some people who have never dieted will view food. She said she will always only be about 85% "normal" in her approach to food (I can't remember the actual number, but it was something like that). She has accepted that, though. That's what I think I and many of us need to accept.
I have two practical observations to add about weight regain.
1. I should not believe all the online calculators that tell me how many calories I can eat/burn in a day to maintain. I did, and it led me to think that I could eat more than I actually can eat. I now have a more realistic number to aim for when I get to maintenance--BUT, the real test will be how much I can eat without regaining! No calculator can give me this number with certainty.
2. If I overeat carbohydrate foods, my body will turn the extra carbs into fat and shut down fat-burning metabolism. I believe this was the "switch" that got pulled when I began to regain. And also, overeating carbs can easily lead to more overeating of carbs--it starts a cycle. You feel more hungry, and you eat more carbs.
I have two practical observations to add about weight regain.
1. I should not believe all the online calculators that tell me how many calories I can eat/burn in a day to maintain. I did, and it led me to think that I could eat more than I actually can eat. I now have a more realistic number to aim for when I get to maintenance--BUT, the real test will be how much I can eat without regaining! No calculator can give me this number with certainty.
2. If I overeat carbohydrate foods, my body will turn the extra carbs into fat and shut down fat-burning metabolism. I believe this was the "switch" that got pulled when I began to regain. And also, overeating carbs can easily lead to more overeating of carbs--it starts a cycle. You feel more hungry, and you eat more carbs.
Jay
I agree with these. I could never do "low-carb" per se, but I have come to the conclusion that I'm better off being conscious of my carb intake. I think many people who struggle with their weight overeat carbs.
I'd get all diet-minded & exercise & feel great & lose the weight & keep it off for a couple months... THEN! ... oh, whatever happened.
I got out of college, had no access to "free gym" anymore. Got a desk job. Sat down. A lot!
I got married, complacent, ate the same things my husband ate.
I re-injured my shoulder that I had surgery on and got depressed & starting eating like there was no tomorrow.
I gave up junk food... and then one day... BAM, a chocolate bar found its way into my mouth!
I could go on & on about WHY I returned to old habits. But facts is facts. I RETURNED TO OLD HABITS. This time is different. This time I'm not just saying "I won't gain it back this time!" - this time I am making a plan, CHANGING my habits, not working toward "a goal" (look hot, wear a certain outfit, wedding, etc.) as so much working toward simply being healthier. Yeah, that's the ticket!
