3 Fat Chicks on a Diet Weight Loss Community  

Go Back   3 Fat Chicks on a Diet Weight Loss Community > Support Forum > Weight Loss Support

Weight Loss Support Give and get support here!

Facing friends after huge weight gain

Reply
 
Thread Tools
Old 07-09-2010, 12:43 AM   #1
It's about time
 
ParadiseFalls's Avatar
 
Join Date: Mar 2010
Location: Portland, Oregon
Posts: 1,252

S/C/G: 300/ticker/175

Height: 5'5"

Default Facing friends after huge weight gain

I'm back in Pennsylvania for the summer, where I went to high school, and I'm about 75 pounds heavier than I was last time I saw my friends here (I was 100 pounds more a few months ago...man am I glad I went down the little bit I did ). And I'm about 100 more than the lowest weight they knew me at, when they first met me.

I'm really ashamed; so much that I'm thinking about blowing them off, even though I was really close to them. They're all male, too, which I feel like might make it more noticeable. I want to see them, but I'm just so humiliated. I know i'll regret it if I don't, but I don't know if I can work up the courage.

Anyone experienced this? Have any advice?
__________________

Goals:
270 (-10%) 5/21| 239 (-20%) | 210 (-30%) | 175 (-40%)

One to my herd for every 10 pounds:


Last edited by ParadiseFalls : 07-09-2010 at 12:45 AM.
ParadiseFalls is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 07-09-2010, 12:47 AM   #2
Senior Member
 
jendiet's Avatar
 
Join Date: Jul 2008
Location: SC
Posts: 3,467

S/C/G: 211/see ticker/140

Height: 5'5"

Default

wow, i totally understand this feeling. Here's the deal. You are there for the summer right? These are long lost friends. I don't think it is going to make a difference because they haven't seen you in a while. They expect people to change over time. Will you be going back next year? If you are, you will be a success story because no doubt you will be healthier and fit and trim by then....don't miss this opportunity to see your friends.
__________________
My Weight Chart:
>
jendiet is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 07-09-2010, 12:48 AM   #3
Senior Member
 
LotusMama's Avatar
 
Join Date: Jul 2009
Posts: 1,198

S/C/G: 234/232/135

Height: 5'8"

Default

These people are your friends because of who you are, not because of your weight. I say hang out with them!

J
__________________
LotusMama is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 07-09-2010, 12:49 AM   #4
WW start date: 6-14-10
 
corgiXpaws's Avatar
 
Join Date: Jul 2010
Location: Orem, Utah
Posts: 38

S/C/G: 236/215.4/135

Height: 5'5"

Default

I faced the same thing a while back when I was living in Vegas for a few months, and some friends of mine from high school (that was only 3 years ago!) were in town and wanted to come by. I was 75lbs more than the last time they saw me... and 100lbs more than when I started high school, and just like you, I was humiliated and terrified of them seeing me like.. this.

I ended up chickening out, and backed out of the plans. But then i got to thinking: Yeah, I've gained weight. So what? Why should that matter to them if they REALLY are my friends? It shouldn't.

I know it's hard, but if they're friends worth keeping, they won't think any differently of you now than they did then. I wish I hadn't have backed out.
corgiXpaws is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 07-09-2010, 12:53 AM   #5
Diet Started: 1/4/10
 
Wild Vulpix's Avatar
 
Join Date: Jan 2010
Location: New Jersey
Posts: 416

S/C/G: 164/ticker/99

Height: 5'0"

Default

Ugh, I know how this is too. I avoided my friends for a while because of weight gain, and ultimately it hurt my friendship a LOT. One of them I don't know if I'll be able to recover.

SO GO! See them! Have a good time!

I just ran into an old friend of mine from High School a month ago. I was SO excited to see her again. Yes, she gained some weight. Yes, I did notice. No, I didn't comment. And NO, it didn't change my view of her or did it effect how good a time we had. Things were just as they always were. If she were to hide away and avoid me... I would have been so sad, and I'd miss out on seeing her. It would only drive us a little more apart than we've already been...

So please. See them. You'll have a good time. Be yourself. (And heavens forbid, don't text on your cellphone the whole time!! That was the only thing I disliked about re encountering my friend. Texting in the presence of company--especially a friend you haven't seen in years--is SO rude [/tirade]) You'll regret it if you don't.
__________________
~*~**Wild Vulpix's Progress Pictures!**~*~
Goal: Comfortably fit into my tiny pants be the time the semester (Spring 2012) ends!
Long term goal:


Mini goal:


One for every mini goal completed (5lbs):
Wild Vulpix is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 07-09-2010, 01:15 AM   #6
Boston Qualifier and MOM
 
ennay's Avatar
 
Join Date: Nov 2006
Location: Oregon
Posts: 5,795

S/C/G: 186/see ticker/?

Height: 5'3.75"

Default

You know, I saw pics from my college reunion. Very few of them were highschool size anymore either.
__________________
A whole lot of setbacks. Starting over.

My before/after pics
ennay is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 07-09-2010, 01:43 AM   #7
Senior Member
 
Natasha1534's Avatar
 
Join Date: Jun 2010
Location: Warner Robins, GA
Posts: 1,941

S/C/G: 346/269.5/180

Height: 5'6"

Default

Honey, you will be surprised to see that they've probably all gained weight, too. Don't put off friends just b/c you're embarrassed...it's just not worth it. Besides, if they're true friends it won't matter to them.
__________________

1st goal - 10% of body weight lost - MET 06/21/10
2nd goal - 100 lbs lost
3rd goal - 180 lbs!!!
Natasha1534 is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 07-09-2010, 01:55 AM   #8
Senior Member
 
luciddepths's Avatar
 
Join Date: Feb 2010
Location: Saskatchewan, Canada
Posts: 1,040

S/C/G: 225/175/140

Height: 5'6

Default

I'm in the same boat ... but we're getting there arent we! closer to our goal every day
__________________
Lose 10 pounds at a time!
every 10 lbs
luciddepths is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 07-09-2010, 09:12 AM   #9
The girl who can
 
Rochester's Avatar
 
Join Date: May 2010
Location: Thornfield Manor
Posts: 796

S/C/G: 240/207.8/165

Height: 5'6"

Default

Quote:
Originally Posted by ParadiseFalls View Post
They're all male, too, which I feel like might make it more noticeable.
If they're male, do you know what will probably happen? One of them will say, "Something looks different. Did you get your haircut or something?" And that will be the end of it. Men are oblivious. Seriously.
__________________


Walking In A Winter Onederland - 199 by Christmas - 18 weeks (3 weeks left)



Valentine Vixens Challenge - 185 by Valentine's Day - 17 weeks (11 weeks left)

My blog: Free To Be Me
Rochester is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 07-09-2010, 09:20 AM   #10
Defying Gravity
 
Losing It 2010's Avatar
 
Join Date: Jul 2010
Location: Nashville, TN
Posts: 1,113

S/C/G: 172/150

Height: 5'0

Default

I just went to my HS reunion and I am much heavier than I was 30 years ago and if anyone thought that I would look and be the same size then they are living in a fantasy land. All the men were bald that were boys when I knew them and many had guts but they are still the same sweet boys I knew back then. The girls were caddy back then and still are as women. I didn't sweat it, just enjoyed those who enjoyed my company as I did theirs.

Quote:
Originally Posted by ParadiseFalls View Post
I'm back in Pennsylvania for the summer, where I went to high school, and I'm about 75 pounds heavier than I was last time I saw my friends here (I was 100 pounds more a few months ago...man am I glad I went down the little bit I did ). And I'm about 100 more than the lowest weight they knew me at, when they first met me.

I'm really ashamed; so much that I'm thinking about blowing them off, even though I was really close to them. They're all male, too, which I feel like might make it more noticeable. I want to see them, but I'm just so humiliated. I know i'll regret it if I don't, but I don't know if I can work up the courage.

Anyone experienced this? Have any advice?
Losing It 2010 is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 07-09-2010, 10:12 AM   #11
Senior Member
 
paris81's Avatar
 
Join Date: Jun 2008
Location: Midwest
Posts: 1,381

S/C/G: 252-255?/ticker/145

Height: 5'6''

Default

Yeah, I think that since they're men, they're way less likely to notice! Women tend (not all women, I personally never notice when people gain or lose weight) to be more judgmental about these things.

Go, have fun, don't worry about it! They're you're friends, and they want to see you and spend time with you, based on your personality, not based on your appearance.
__________________
No binge since 5/10/10
Mini-goal #1: 1st 10 lbs: 10/07/09
Mini-goal #2: 10% of body weight: 4/28/10 (Finally!)
Mini-goal #3: 211 lbs (my all-time adult low): 1/26/11
Mini-goal #4: 20% of SW (202lbs):
Mini-goal #5: Onederland!:

Overall goal
paris81 is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 07-09-2010, 10:20 AM   #12
tamIam
 
greeneggsandtam's Avatar
 
Join Date: Mar 2007
Location: Canada
Posts: 443

S/C/G: size16/size14/size10

Height: 5'7"

Default

@Rochester- lol! I was thinking the same thing.
__________________
Shin: A device for finding furniture in the dark.
greeneggsandtam is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 07-09-2010, 12:41 PM   #13
Senior Member
 
SouthLake's Avatar
 
Join Date: Dec 2007
Location: Bay Area, CA
Posts: 497

S/C/G: 239/200/130-140

Height: 5'8.5"

Default

I gained 90 pounds in about 3.5 years (ouch!) When I saw my college freinds for the first time again, I almost just blew it all off. But, it was fine, no one said anything (though I'm sure they noticed) and we had a great time. At some point, I mentioned that I was working on losing weight and lost close to 20 so far (I think because I turned down somethign tasty!) and everyone said that was awesome and I looked great, etc. I figured that way I got the elephant in the room out of the way, and I could stop worrying about it. But really, you'll regret not seeing them. You're switching to a lifestyle that is all about living your life to the fullest and not letting your weight hold you back. Let this time with friends refelct that.
__________________

Fighting back from the regain

Strong is the new skinny.
SouthLake is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 07-09-2010, 12:46 PM   #14
westernsoutherngirl
 
westernsoutherngirl's Avatar
 
Join Date: Jan 2010
Location: Colorado
Posts: 248

S/C/G: 170/164/145

Height: 5'6'

Default

See them! I didn't go to my 30th high school reunion this fall because I felt too fat and have regretted it ever since! Plus I saw the pics from the reunion when they were posted on FB and let's just say I was unnecessarily worried!
__________________
westernsoutherngirl is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 07-09-2010, 12:48 PM   #15
Boston Qualifier and MOM
 
ennay's Avatar
 
Join Date: Nov 2006
Location: Oregon
Posts: 5,795

S/C/G: 186/see ticker/?

Height: 5'3.75"

Default

They are all men? Oh they will be too busy worrying that you'll notice they have gone bald to notice that you have gained weight.
__________________
A whole lot of setbacks. Starting over.

My before/after pics
ennay is offline   Reply With Quote
Reply
Posts by members, moderators and admins are not considered medical advice
and no guarantee is made against accuracy.


Thread Tools

Posting Rules
You may not post new threads
You may not post replies
You may not post attachments
You may not edit your posts

vB code is On
Smilies are On
[IMG] code is On
HTML code is Off
Trackbacks are On
Pingbacks are On
Refbacks are Off

Similar Threads
Thread Thread Starter Forum Replies Last Post
300+ And Ready To Try Again Weekly Thread #1095 AmmiUK 300+ Club 145 03-05-2007 11:01 AM
Sticking With It potato Support Groups 381 09-27-2006 07:57 PM
Special thoughts and Prayers going out to Sarah today Sandi 100 lb. Club 223 07-06-2005 05:45 PM


All times are GMT -4. The time now is 09:30 PM.






Powered by vBulletin® Version 3.6.7
Copyright ©2000 - 2015, Jelsoft Enterprises Ltd.
Search Engine Optimization by vBSEO 3.3.2