visit from mom drove me to eat...again

  • Here we go again.....Why do I do this to myself...

    My mom came down to visit today. Again, no notice of my weight loss. Twenty six pounds, and no comment from her. Could it just not be noticeable? Anyway, the real kicker of the afternoon was that my sister in law was over, and my mom told HER she looked thinner (she is, she's been doing LA weight loss).

    So what do I do-eat, of course. I left my mom playing with Matthew (my husband was asleep, cause he works Sunday nights) My trigger problem foods-pizza (well, two slices-at least one had broccoli on it) Then one of those toll house ice cream sandwiches...eating ice cream in NJ in March when it's been freezing out-how pathetic is that. One of those ice cream sandwiches has the calories of almost a whole meal, probably. I'm disgusted with myself. To be honest, I wasn't hungry, and it tasted disgustingly sweet. I ate it out of anger. I thought I'd made some progress with dealing with my mother and food, but I guess I haven't.

    I wanted to "confess" what I ate to you guys, cause I know you'll understand.

    Well, tomorrow is another day. I'll be seeing her again the end of this month for our March family birthday celebration-my mom, mother in law, husband and nephew all have March birthdays. I need to handle this better. I should be doing this for ME and no one else.

    Help!

    Sherry
  • Sherry - You're right - you have to do it for just you. However, you are only human and it's going to piss you off when someone as close as your mom doesn't even notice. Do you think she *really* didn't notice, or do you think she's not noticing on purpose? Does she have a lot of weight to lose herself? Has weight always been a point of contention between you two?
  • Emotional eating is such a tough problem. I'm curious, too, if you and your mom have had a lot of issues around this topic. Maybe your mom is afraid to say anything about your weight loss? Family and weight loss--it's a volatile combination!

    Since you know when she's coming, maybe you can psych yourself up to deal with her? Don't expect her to say anything, and then try to have a way to deal with your stress. Like going for a walk (the bad weather has to be gone by then, right?) or standing outside doing deep breathing.

    At least you recognize what's going on, and maybe some additional planning will make the next visit go easier.
  • I think psyching yourself up for her next visit is a great idea. It'd be nice if she noticed, but you can't count on that.

    What is LA Weight Loss?
  • Sherry,
    I too gave into emotional eating.But it wasn't with my mother. It had to do with co workers. I get so mad at myself when I do that,but at the time it just feels like something I have to do. I am going to try next time(because I know there will be a next time)to
    stop myself,and think about how I will feel after if I binge.This time I ate 1/2 gallon Of butterpecan icecream,and a large bag of salt and vinegar chips.
    Good Luck in dealing with this!
    Lauren
  • Hi,

    Thanks for your support. My mom and I go WAY back with food issues, starting with when she dragged me to weight watchers at aged fourteen-I was five feet eight inches tall and weighed 128-oh the horror-and was told to lose seven pounds. Surprise-after doing that, I kept gaining and losing ten more pounds each time I did weight watchers....fast forward to college and her bugging me some more...then hearing before getting married "aren't you going to lose weight for your wedding?" Gee, I never thought of that mom.

    What gets me is that she should understand. She's been on a diet for my whole life, and I'm thirty four! I think her highest weight was around 225-I'm not sure.

    Oh, well, I can't change how people act, I can only control my reaction to them. When I see her the end of this month, I'm not bringing up the subject. I WILL be seeing both my sisters for the first time since losing weight, and I know they will be supportive and notice..at least I hope so!

    LA weight Loss is a program where you go weekly and they weigh you. They try to push soy protein bars on you (by the case-my sister tried it and quit). They also have some weird food plans, leaving out whole food groups for a week when you start. IThere's a board on 3FC with dieting scams, and there's a ton of posts about it. You also have to pay a lot of money up front.

    Thanks,
    sherry