I'm not sure if this counts, but a couple of weeks ago I binged for 5 days straight and gained 5 pounds, but by the next week I had lost them all. My diet is fairly spartan, however, and thus I've found that I can "survive" the occasional involuntary binge.

I started dieting in Janruary 2007. I weighed 298 at the time (I had been over 300 at various times though) By the end of August I weighed 248 pounds, then college started back up and I just got tired and stopped trying. By January 2008 I was back up to over 280, so that's a 35 pound gain in, like, no time. For the last year and a half I have pretended to start dieting just to lose track a day later and stayed in the 270's.

Well, hopefully, I am going to keep with it this time! I have been trying very hard for 2 weeks which is the longest since I first gained the weight back. I feel determined and I have goals, I want to succeed more than anything and that's helped overpower my desire to eat constantly. There are a few keys to success I have to remember. One is to keep coming to this forum! It helps me! The other is to not let one mess up totally derail all of my success! I often mess up once and then just give up because I feel defeated. Not anymore, I can come back from anything!

Thank you JoJo and Beth for sharing your stories

This has soooo been my last 12 months! I really believe that checking in here regularly and feeling accountable even if no one actually cares what I weigh (ha!) has been helpful for me. As well as reading everyone's unique stories.

I have been so all or nothing in the past that my plan at the moment is that I have no plan! And so far so good!

I am the QUEEN of yo-yos -- here's my history since I graduated high school and NO pregnancies were involved, just some serious eating

155-140
140-165
165-132
132-165
165-135
135-175
175-155
155-185 maintained a bit
185-212 maintained a bit
212-158
158-244 EEEK!
244-170
170-202
202-175 (Present Weight)

Sigh -- do ya think I have FOOD ISSUES??? Hahaha!

Seriously, I'm back on track, and finally "get" that I can't put myself through this anymore, and I have to address the way I live instead of JUST the numbers on the scale. But, gosh darn it, I DO live by the numbers...Gotta break that thought pattern...

You'll make it!

Kira

Looks like we need a reformed yo-yo'ers thread!

ha!! Love it!!!!!!

I am so over the yo yo-ing!!!!! Some days I feel like Oprah . . . I am 36 years old . . . how can I STILL be talking about weight?????

Intellectually I know its not about the foooooood! So why do I keep making it about the food.

Like you Kira, I dont have the energy to ever diet again and have to address the way that I have set up my life rather than focus on the numbers. . . . but dang it if I don't love to obsessively track my weight loss . . .

idealmuse - how about an Oy-Oy thread? Opposite of yo yo and as in Oy . . . here we go again. . .

ha!

Michelle I just saw your siggy that you are doing 30 Day Shred! I looooove Jillian. I think I did 5 days before I got a tad distracted but I love love love loved it!

I am so over the yo yo-ing!!!!! Some days I feel like Oprah . . . I am 36 years old . . . how can I STILL be talking about weight?????

You know, Ms Danni, the longer that I am on this forum, the more convinced I become that food NEVER ceases to be an issue REGARDLESS of the success of the individual for most people. You see it all the time with the long-time maintainers, and with those whose tickers haven't moved since January, and those who are trying their best.

I wish I knew how do just put food "in its place", so to speak. I get tired of thinking, planning, measuring, charting, calculating, weighing...food, food choices, food preparation, calories in, calories out -- it becomes all-consuming.

And sometimes, late at night, I wonder IF talking about weight and even being part of the forum is part of the problem...I don't like to say that out loud because I LOVE the forum, but a little part of me thinks "If I just stopped OBSESSING about food, maybe it wouldn't be such a factor in my life..."

I don't know if that makes any sense, but that is what I wonder..



Kira

I went through the same thing last year Kira on a friend's forum in a community that I had been part of for a few years. I still am in contact with those girls (facebook, email etc etc loooove them) but I needed a break from being around people (online for weight support I mean) who knew me when I was a superstar if that makes sense? I feel like being in that environment where I had lost weight at lightning speed was not good for me, not bcos they are not supportive, but it continually reminded me of the weight I had gained, that I was not 'perfect' (I know, I know).

You know the only time when I felt like I was "there" . . . you know, that magical place where overweight people think that you get when you lose the weight was last year on holidays in the USA. I spent three months there and was at my lowest weight and was able to keep it off and stable all the while eating oooooh "forbidden" foods and never actually weighing myself (just going by how my clothes felt). But the thing was I never just sat around and ate - as I have this last year . . . I was active, I ran every day when I woke up, then walked around the city all day for hours and hours, and stopped for meals when I was hungry and ate whatever called to me and stopped when I was full. I was happy. And I know I cant be on holiday all the time ($$$$) but I need more joy in my life I realised. . . this past year has seen so many changes and so many people are now no longer in my life but I have not mourned the end of those relationships - I just ate Domino's!

Remembering my time overseas makes me happy . . knowing that it IS in me that it IS possible for me to live a life of balance if my emotional and other needs are being met.

I love all this stuff . . . some good thoughts there Kira Thankies for a great post.

You hang in there, Ms Danni -- I really appreciate your post. I understand how hard it is to find that "balance", where everything just seems to flow and life is grand. If that balance could be bottled, I'd be first in line...hmmmm, sounds like we should develop a new weight loss pill -- BALANCE IN A BOTTLE...Hahaha!

You can pm me any time, too!!! I TOTALLY get where you are coming from, and you don't need to be a star all the time

Kira

Kira, I have tried dieting in the past but never seemed to get off the ground to loose weight,The weight never came off then I'd give up after a few weeks then go on a WTH binge and gain weight and park.It is just now that I realized that my body starts off at plateau,So now I just eat healthy, not dieting, but healthier, I don't eat white flour white rice or white sugar, I had to cut those out because I have lots of digestion issues, just replaced those with whole grains, and natural sweeteners.IT has taken me a month and a half to lose 10 lbs, looking at it week by week I show no weight loss what so ever, but on a graph, I see the weight loss. So I know what you are saying about getting it, I too feel for the first time in mu dieting attempts that this time, I am going to make it, because I have to for my health. I have liver damage.

Danni Well I am starting to get bored with my workout, but not ready for L2D1, I have two new DVD coming anyday now....What are you doing for exercise? And why havnt you put up your ticker, curious to know what your OMG! I must do something!! I had never ever went over 200 that was my OMG number, lol even now I go when did this happen, when wasnt I looking? when I was stuffing food in my mouth as fast as I could. Before I gained sanity to catch myself is when.....ugh.

LOL Michelle you make me giggle!!!! I havent put up a ticker cos I am trying (ha!) to move away from the whole concept of dieting. I definitely have goals around weight (how can I not) but my main aim is to continue feeling calm, in control and dare I say it . . . sane.

I hear you about the DVDs. I tend to get bored quickly too. I am curently doing pilates using a reformer machine and running. I looooove to run!! Unfortunately the additional weight makes a HUGE difference to how I run. In fact the desire to feel good and have the energy to be a gazelle is enough motivation to stay on the path to health.

I have been thinking about being a bit more structured in the way I eat . . . all I have done this week is eat when I am hungry and go for as much unprocessed food as possible. I just dont wanna change up something that is keeping me so stable and that has me feeling so full of energy.

But I think a lifetime of dieting has me thinking . . .hmmmm . . . will I actually lose weight if I eat fruit, veg, lean proteins, legumes and some whole grains if I am not following a DIET and checking things off a list? I hear how that sounds, but that is what is in there! ha!

Hey Danni,

I know how ya feel....I have now, in addittion to smaller triumphs along the way, lost and regained huge amounts of weight 3 times since leaving university.
2 of those times I lost over 100lbs.

This is No. 4 go. I have never been as scared as I am this time, as I know so well how badly I have failed to keep it off before. I am hoping that this fear will be the difference from the last times. I think i was a lot more angry with myself for what I had done at the beginning of times 2 and 3, and spent a lot of time wondering how and why I could have let it happen (the whole forgiveness thing). It hasn't seemed to be an issue for me this time, just a fear of doing the same again.

It definitely is all about being in the zone, but I have thought I was in that very same before, and somehow I let it happen over and over.

As you say, it has to be a day at a time, and right now I feel like I will definitely do it - I really really want to be a part of the maintainers Threads for a long long time, fingers crossed.

Keep positive and good luck