For the first time in a week my newspaper was delivered on time! Unfortunately it took me twice as long to read it as I attempted to focus on the words.
And what does it say about me that I'm eating a 100-calorie bag of popcorn for breakfast?
We just had bacon and bread for dinner. The vegetable was ketchup a la George Bush Sr. What does that say about me?
LOL at the funny food choices. I had pancakes and sausage for breakfast, except they were whole grain "flapjacks" and morningstar farms veggie sausage. I started buying this brand of pancake mix called "Kodiak Cakes." It's got this hilarious story on the box about how people coopted big hearty whole grain lumberjack flapjacks and turned them into weak limp pancakes.
I took the afternoon off work yesterday to help DH with the babies. Afternoon was a mix of them being okay and them refusing to nap -- I ended up rocking C to sleep for two different naps, which I usually never need to do. Then bedtime was a massive disaster. A screamed for an hour and a half and refused to eat and refused to sleep, then eventually had a big #2, ate, screamed some more, let out a bunch of big burps and passed a whole lot of stinky gas, and passed out. C just fussed for a really long time before going to sleep. DH and I had to keep trading babies because we both lost patience with A really quickly.
In any case I am having DH make a doctor appointment for them today. A has been coughing some and I'm pretty sure it's because of her reflux but feel better getting it checked out, esp. since it's Friday and their office will be closed on the weekend. I'm afraid that their reflux med is no longer working. There are a couple options but the one they are on (zantac) is the safest and most well-studied....unfortunately it's also been shown in studies to suddenly stop working. Not sure which is worse -- switching to another medication that may have side effects down the line, or having them be terribly uncomfortable and not sleep well for the next 2-3 months until they grow out of it. I would think interrupted sleep would be a cause of developmental side effects too.
Anyway, I'm waiting to hear from DH, who is probably trying to get them down for their nap right now.
We just had bacon and bread for dinner. The vegetable was ketchup a la George Bush Sr. What does that say about me?
Dagmar
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And what does it say about me that I'm eating a 100-calorie bag of popcorn for breakfast?
I think it says exactly as you indicted with your smilie, Dagmar. That you're tired. You've been busy and stressed with your renovations, moving, on top of your usual workload, and DH hasn't been the most helpful or supportive at times.
I'm not sure with Allison, but hey, it's just popcorn. Maybe something to do with your newly emptied nest?
We're human beings. We don't eat perfectly all the time. I personally try to follow a 90/10 rule because the 80/20 rule is too lax for my body, but the 80/20 idea is a good one. It acknowledges that we can't be perfect all the time.
If you ladies need to vent, vent away. Pull up a chair and here's a bowl of spiced mixed nuts, because they're chock full of vitamins and minerals and taste delicious in the fall. Have a hot cup of tea. Take a few deep breaths. That goes for anyone! Perhaps "take care of yourself" Friday is in order?
Jessica, we posted at the same time. Sorry the girls are having more sleep troubles. I had MF "sausage" for breakfast, too! I made an "egg mcmuffin" with a light English muffin, 1 egg, and a MF patty.
I am in NO position to comment about what choices my friends are making for breakfast and dinner! I'm just going to say it's good not to be alone.
Looking forward to tonight - we are going to Ann Arbor to hear Andras Schiff perform the Bach Goldberg Variations. It's one of those things that my piano teacher told me was a "must see"; I've been waiting something like 8 years to get the opportunity. Not too many pianists want to tackle this one!
Jessica-- I hope you get some relief from the girls. They truly grow up all too fast. We are dealing with our youngest dd's first fender bender. We didn't think the guy would file a claim as dd swears there was barely a scratch on his car but we just got notification that a claim was made. Sigh.
Dh returns tomorrow night from China but he's only going to be here a week this time before he heads back. He's been battling food poisoning so I suspect he's going to be jet lagged/ wiped out the whole week he's here.
My stupid weight has gone up 1/2 a pound every single day since I reported it lower here (knew I would jinx it). So horribly frustrating and trying not to throw in the towel. I've not felt 100% so I'm hoping it's all related somehow.
It's been a little while and if anyone was thinking or wondering about me, I apologize for not checking in.
In September I went on vaca to a cabin in PA with DH and the dogs. We had a great time. But I received some discouraging medical news. Nothing dramatic, but enough to upset me.
I ate a lot while on vacation - and then when I got back, I couldn't stop eating. And I had - well, a complete meltdown.
I wanted to get on here and talk about it, but I just couldn't. I was so ashamed and lost. I knew you guys would understand and be supportive but I still couldn't do it.
The eating and meltdown lasted only a short time, but the emotional after-effects have continued. I just feel - lost. Like I'm floundering. There is nothing WRONG, per se, but I just feel like my mojo has been stolen.
I have checked in here regularly and wanted to post but I just could not do it. But I am here today and decided to jump back in.
Oh, Jen, I'm sorry you feel like your MOJO has been ripped away. A lot of us are struggling right now so we understand. Remember that this is the place to come and vent and have a shoulder to cry on. Glad you're back!
Jen, oh thank goodness, there you are. Yes, I missed you. I know I asked after you here at least once. But I figured you just dropped off because ... well, you know, people do silly things like swear they'll spend less time on the Internet ... or they get caught up in another online community and spend less time on one they previously visited ... or who knows what?
I understand about the meltdown. I'm talking myself away from the brink of one today, with a five-pound regain since going back to a rather intense work schedule after a week on vacation. I can feel the pace accelerating as I'm going to have to train three new hires, complete all the year-end evaluations for my direct reports and write a whole mess of research that fell to me since we were down two people. I am not going to be much fun to be around till the beginning of December, when our 2014 begins. (Yeah, company's fiscal years are weird.)
Talk to me more about your feeling "lost." You mean, having less direction or purpose? Questioning your identity? Wondering what it's all about, and why we're doing all of this?
I think that, too. Like why do I feel dutiful but not particularly happy most of the time. And what is all this labor for?
Talk to me more about your feeling "lost." You mean, having less direction or purpose? Questioning your identity? Wondering what it's all about, and why we're doing all of this?
Yes, yes and YES! As always you are right on the money. I don't know if it's because I have had such rigid and clear cut goals for the last 3 years - first losing and then maintaining and now I'm like - "Ok, what now?" - or what.
I'm not unhappy. I'm just looking for purpose I guess - or meaning. And I wonder if I will FOREVER be held hostage by my rigidity and constantly judging myself by the number on the scale.
I wonder if I will ever be able to eat without questioning and judging what I am doing.
I wonder if I will ever skip a workout without berating myself for days afterwards or "punishing" myself by an extra hard workout the next day.
I wonder if I will ever be able to eat without questioning and judging what I am doing.
I wonder if I will ever skip a workout without berating myself for days afterwards or "punishing" myself by an extra hard workout the next day.
Jen
Glad to see you back! But I'm sorry to hear of your meltdown. And of the discouraging news that precipitated it. Is it anything you want to or feel comfortable talking about?
Right now, the answer to these questions for me is "probably not". Or maybe, "not until I'm 80".
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Originally Posted by saef
I think that, too. Like why do I feel dutiful but not particularly happy most of the time. And what is all this labor for?
Yes yes. The satisfaction of finally coming out the other side after slogging through a massive project is the closest thing to happiness that I have felt recently. But it's not happiness, it's more a feeling of relief. Or the temporary lifting of guilt.
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Originally Posted by alinnell
Oh, Jen, I'm sorry you feel like your MOJO has been ripped away. A lot of us are struggling right now so we understand. Remember that this is the place to come and vent and have a shoulder to cry on. Glad you're back!
I will raise my hand to be counted as one of the struggling peeps. After a week of rigid calorie counting and regular, substantial exercise, I am up another 2 pounds. I am struggling with the mechanisms of weight loss/control, and also with the emotional baggage that accompanies it.
One of my cats appears to have been replaced by a small leopard - such caterwauling. Surely she isn't trying to suggest it's DINNER time (it's 1:04 p.m. and they eat at around 4:30).
DH and I took Culley, the office cat, to the vet today. He was due for his rabies shot and never had any of the other normal cat vaccinations. We had him tested to see if he had feline leukemia and he's negative, so now he's vaccinated against it. Now, if should ever need to, we can bring him home and feel safe that he doesn't have anything he can give our house cats. The vet vista was much easier than I imagined. He was actually civil to the vet and her assistant! He hardly cried at all in the car (not at all what I get from my house cats!).
On another note, Chico refused breakfast this morning. He's still acting just fine but simply wouldn't eat. I picked up some chicken and sweet potatoes and just got finished cooking that up for his meals for the next few days. This is sad. I hope this isn't a signal for the inevitable.
I'm just going to say it's good not to be alone. 
re Chico. Hope he's here with you awhile longer.
