When I first lost my weight I got those comments a lot. I still get people asking me all the time if I'm still trying to lose weight (no), if I've lost more weight (no) and telling me not to lose more weight (I'm not). I agree that it takes awhile for people to get used to the "thinner" us. Also, most of the country is overweight, so we do look thin compared to the "norm". For myself, parts of me do look quite thin while I still have other parts of me that look far from thin. It is too bad we can't lose weight where we want to or spread it around! If your son is still concerned, you might want to bring him to the doctor with you. How does your dh feel (if you're married)?
Please join us in the maintenance threads! We would love to have you!
I thought I would look skeletal at this weight, but I don't. Not even close. The last ten pounds finally made my hips more in proportion to the top half. I will always be a pear, but I can finally wear straight skirts. I think people that get worried are judging by my face. I think it is starting to look a little better as the months go by.
Give your son a big hug and thank him for his concern. Most boys don't take that much notice of their Mothers at that age. Very sweet!
When I got close to my goal weight I switched entirely to bodyfat because I figured that if I didnt realize I was fat at 186 lbs, why do I think I could adequately judge if I was thin?
As for your son, I think it is good to acknowledge that you hear his concern and you are going to have the doctor confirm that your weight is healthy.
And I have had people tell me NOW "WOW you have lost even more weight"...uh no, I am up 20-30 lbs, thanks.
* as I remind myself why I am not talking to my friend who I think is wasting away...
I thought I would look skeletal at this weight, but I don't. Not even close. The last ten pounds finally made my hips more in proportion to the top half. I will always be a pear, but I can finally wear straight skirts. I think people that get worried are judging by my face. I think it is starting to look a little better as the months go by.
Give your son a big hug and thank him for his concern. Most boys don't take that much notice of their Mothers at that age. Very sweet!
Yes! This is exactly what I'm hearing too. It's something about my face. It really hurts my feelings and makes me feel crappy. I mean here I go and work so, SO hard to become healthy and I got discouraging comments like that.
I've always been the kind of person who looks like I weigh less than I do. Even way back as a child. The doctor told my mom I was going to be one of those "lucky girls who hold their weight well".
Again (I've said this elsewhere on here) I can NOT thank you all enough for this place! Its is sooooo nice to not feel alone anymore. This site and the way you all share so transparently has been a Godsend!
I think it is very inspiring to hear from such a chorus of people with support, thoughtful ideas, gentle nudges when there's an item of concern, and congratulations on all the effort. It's just great.
I have one lady friend in town who's lost almost half her weight this year. I started off before her and she saw how "effort in" equates with "results found". She's lost so much and looks great. Her friend (who also works in the same large place I do) has also taken her results as inspiration and guidance to start her own weight loss.
We each hear the same crowd of friends say the same overwhelming "wows" and "you look terrifics". It's a bit embarrassing to have people focus on the thing that made me a bit vulnerable when I was heavy. Mostly everyone is great. The office ladies are the ones who tell me I'm way too thin. Usually, it's when they're pushing some giant muffin both stuffed with a cream but covered in a frosting.
I think weirdest comments that have persisted have been "you look like you've lost a lot of weight, is that a good thing?" This has happened so many times. Folks think that weight loss is because of serious disease not health.
I work in an office (and have worked on the project itself at points) where we are focusing on BMIs, healthy living, severe obesity statistics amongst the city's kids, and changing the way the city organizes resources and the landscape to make healthy habits the norm.
So, my thoughts on people thinking we look skeletal is because the average person more than 20 pounds overweight in my community. Anyone at mid-BMI IS extremely thin to their size. I remember this guy on "Frontier House" (a PBS program where people lived like prarie pioneers on the frontier for six months). One man (from some rich town in CA) was freaking out because he was skeletal. The television producers had a doctor check him out (to calm him down) and explained how he actually was coming in to what is defined as fit and healthy. He had worked out all his muscles to farm land and was fit.
For me, that's my measure. Fit-ness. I've been struggling this year with my knees. They started me on this weight loss strategy to see if they'd improve. I'm sidelined again because of them. So, I'm really examining my fit--ness and how I can maintain this weight within the over arching goal of being physically fit. I'm much more positive today after finding a bunch of resources lately.
To sum up my soliliquay, folks are not necessarily the best judge of your fitness. As a Quaker, I find queries important and appreciate others who notice where I might focus my consideration. But that's as far as I can take people's concern then I pick it up and determine where I am in relation to spiritual and physical facts.
Congratulations on such a wonderful achievement. May the next goal be just as successful and well earned.
Last edited by iaradajnos; 01-03-2010 at 11:52 AM.
I have been getting the "you are too thin" comments from all around. Just the other day, my father-in-law said something like "we don't want to hear that you have an eating disorder". Which, I don't have an eating disorder, not even close.
I've been overweight my whole life. Even I am not used to seeing myself at this weight. Do I look thin? Yes... and I LOVE IT. Do I look sick, or skeletal, or TOO THIN? No... I think I am perfect right where I am.
As long as you feel good about how you look, and your body FEELS good where it is... I don't think you have anything to worry about. If your doctor is cool with it, that should be even more of a reassurance.
