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Intuitive Eating: June 2014

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Old 06-27-2014, 07:54 PM   #196
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This is a safe place to vent, so please don't feel like you need to apologize!!

I actually have overcome the swimsuit issue years ago. I just want to have fun with my kids and a swimsuit is part of it. They don't care what I look like because I'm just mom. They want to have fun and that means me being in the pool. I used to then be sort of embarrassed to be around people I knew (other than family) in my suit. Then I got over that too because you know what, if you care what I look like in my suit, then I feel sorry for you and your lack of anything in important in your life - geez. No one should give a hoot about what I look like in my suit - so if they don't care then why in the H am I caring so much? I just want to have fun and live my life no matter what size or shape I am.

I also started Kosama this week and its so hot in there and I sweat like crazy. so I went and bought some sleeveless work out shirts. My friend who also goes says, "oh I can't wear those shirts, my arms are so flabby". Yep, so are mine but who gives a rip? I'm working out and I don't want to be hot or have my boobs falling out all over so this is what I'm wearing. If you can't handle it then too bad so sad for you - not me. When I showed up today in one, the main lady at the front desk looked at me - I could tell she looked at my bare arms (or maybe my farmers tan) but who cares? I am who I am and I'm not missing out because of my size anymore. I'm just so over it.

Your body has survived so much and you deserve to be happy and wear whatever you want to regardless of what others think... LIVE IN THE NOW!!!

About the ex's - I doubt they even noticed. We give men way too much credit. My husband has never cared and my weight with him has been as low as 190 and up to 300. Other men I've dated have always marveled at the fact that I see myself this way and I was shocked that they didn't. So again, we give them too much credit. YOU should be thinking "dodged a bullet" with both of those yahoos because you ROCK IT SISTER!
I love all of this! I need to get over it and go in my swimsuit with the kids. I have always been self conscious in a swimsuit even at my lowest weight. I think its more a mental thing.

I sat down to eat dinner today and realized as I was eating that I was not hungry. So, I stopped even though it was a delicious dinner and I had been looking forward to it and I packed it up. Im hoping I will be hungry later to eat it but if not, it will make a great breakfast. I had been running all day and snacked too close to dinner so I will try not to make that mistake again.
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Old 06-28-2014, 01:21 PM   #197
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@Pattygirl: This is what it is all about - GREAT WIN!!! WE ARE THE AFTER PICTURE!

@Seana: Read some Geenen Roth - an earlier posts gives some reading tips that are super useful. Continually ask yourself if you are hungry or not and do not eat unless you are. If you aren't and it's been 20 minutes then go ahead and eat. You probably are experiencing mouth hunger. The Intuitive Eating book is also helpful about this. I highly recommend it.
Downloaded a Book by Geenen Roth. I don't remember which one. The most recent one about eating and I started reading it.

So I have two different feeling of "hunger." One is definitely hunger. Stomach growling uncomfortable feeling. And then, a sort of empty feeling in my stomach. I can eat and I should be obvious that I'm not hungry, and yet I still am. It is trying to get rid of this feeling that often leads to some of my binge eating. It's almost like restless stomach syndrome in which the only thing to do is to stretch it out until I don't feel it anymore. I really have to figure that one out.
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Old 06-29-2014, 12:04 AM   #198
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Downloaded a Book by Geenen Roth. I don't remember which one. The most recent one about eating and I started reading it.

So I have two different feeling of "hunger." One is definitely hunger. Stomach growling uncomfortable feeling. And then, a sort of empty feeling in my stomach. I can eat and I should be obvious that I'm not hungry, and yet I still am. It is trying to get rid of this feeling that often leads to some of my binge eating. It's almost like restless stomach syndrome in which the only thing to do is to stretch it out until I don't feel it anymore. I really have to figure that one out.
I'm no expert but what you describe is different levels on the hunger scale (to me anyway). There are many versions of scales out there. It guides you at what level to eat at and the level to stop at. The book "intuitive eating" does an excellent and more precise job at explaining this.


I had a bad day of eating. But tomorrow is a new day and I have no guilt. And it's almost bedtime.
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Old 06-29-2014, 12:07 AM   #199
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So my husband just left to take home a friend of ours who has no car. It's just me, the kids asleep in bed, and fresh cookies we made tonight. (of which I had one for desert after dinner and then wanted no more of) As soon as they left my first thought was oooh cookies! And then I was like why? Why do i need to eat just because Im home alone? Am I hungry? I checked in with myself. Nope, the answer to that is no. So, I drank some water because I realized I hadn't had much water today and that was that. I am not thinking about the cookies or food, except to write this. It's weird, the past week or so its like a switch has flipped for me. I will think about the cookies, ice cream, whatever. And I will sometimes really really want it. But, I will tell myself if I want it later I can absolutely have it but since Im not hungry, lets just wait for a bit. And when later comes I have forgotten about it or I don't want it anymore. THis never used to happen. It was want cake, eat cake. Or, want cake, don't have cake, then eat all night long because I felt deprived or 2 days later rebound binge on cake. I think I genuinely believe myself now that I will have the cake/cookies whatever later if I really want them and so the urgency is gone.

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Old 06-29-2014, 12:33 AM   #200
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That's a great tactic pinkhippie, tell yourself that you can have then later if you really really want it. I need to employ that trick more.
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Old 06-29-2014, 09:58 AM   #201
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So my husband just left to take home a friend of ours who has no car. It's just me, the kids asleep in bed, and fresh cookies we made tonight. (of which I had one for desert after dinner and then wanted no more of) As soon as they left my first thought was oooh cookies! And then I was like why? Why do i need to eat just because Im home alone? Am I hungry? I checked in with myself. Nope, the answer to that is no. So, I drank some water because I realized I hadn't had much water today and that was that. I am not thinking about the cookies or food, except to write this. It's weird, the past week or so its like a switch has flipped for me. I will think about the cookies, ice cream, whatever. And I will sometimes really really want it. But, I will tell myself if I want it later I can absolutely have it but since Im not hungry, lets just wait for a bit. And when later comes I have forgotten about it or I don't want it anymore. THis never used to happen. It was want cake, eat cake. Or, want cake, don't have cake, then eat all night long because I felt deprived or 2 days later rebound binge on cake. I think I genuinely believe myself now that I will have the cake/cookies whatever later if I really want them and so the urgency is gone.

Yes!!!!! I do this all the time. At the beginning I didn't forget and had it when I was hungry all the time. Now it's like when I ask myself what I really want when I'm hungry I want something else usually and not the cake, ice cream, candy,cookies insert here what you were thinking about earlier. This is awesome, right?

My coach is annoying and abrasive but this is the number one thing she pounded into my head: you can always have whatever you want, the next time you are hungry.

GREAT JOB!
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Old 06-29-2014, 09:59 AM   #202
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That's a great tactic pinkhippie, tell yourself that you can have then later if you really really want it. I need to employ that trick more.
You totally can do this!!! Oh and it's not a trick, it is the truth!!! You can have whatever you want.... When you are hungry!!!

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Old 06-29-2014, 02:34 PM   #203
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That's a great tactic pinkhippie, tell yourself that you can have then later if you really really want it. I need to employ that trick more.
Yes I think in order for it to work though you have to be eating whatever you want when you are hungry AND you have to genuinely be ok with the fact that if later rolls around and you still want the food, that its ok to eat it, and not try to deny yourself. It took me a while to reach this point because delaying my food gratification felt too much like the dieting mindset. Now, it feels more like taking care of myself because if Im not hungry, my body really doesn't need it but if I really want it later, I will have it. And it doesn't have to be really really. Just, if I still want it. I think its a process.

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Yes!!!!! I do this all the time. At the beginning I didn't forget and had it when I was hungry all the time. Now it's like when I ask myself what I really want when I'm hungry I want something else usually and not the cake, ice cream, candy,cookies insert here what you were thinking about earlier. This is awesome, right?

My coach is annoying and abrasive but this is the number one thing she pounded into my head: you can always have whatever you want, the next time you are hungry.

GREAT JOB!
Ive noticed that too about when Im really hungry, I usually end up wanting something else. But, I have to be careful with this because then I don't end up eating the treat that I wanted and I feel deprived later. I think part of the key for me has been I am eating treats if I want them when Im hungry so when the evening rolls around and I have my automatic thought of cookie ice cream chocolate, It's much easier for me to be like, well do I really want that right now? How about we just wait til later? And usually myself is like Ok, we can do that. I think I have finally started to forge a good relationship between myself and myself. I trust myself to not deprive myself of food anymore so myself is cool with delaying a treat for a while to see if I actually want it or if its just a habit urge. Wow, that was confusing.

It sounds like you are doing so awesome! Im glad your abrasive coach can at least be helpful in some ways.

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Old 06-30-2014, 08:58 AM   #204
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I'm a little scared to see my NT this week. I feel like I've gone 2 steps back and have hardly worked on any of her suggestions this week. I feel a sort of apathy right now. In sure shell be disappointed.
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Old 06-30-2014, 12:46 PM   #205
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Have any of you ever felt like you've made "dieting" a hobby? When I have down time and get on the net I find I'm always reading about dieting stuff. I go to this site and find myself reading others posts about how well they are doing (or not doing) and it seems to be what's dragging back into the diet mentality. It's like I don't know what else to read about or do on the net other than looking at dieting stuff. If I say I'm not going to read any of it I honestly don't know what else to do!
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Old 06-30-2014, 01:20 PM   #206
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Yes I think in order for it to work though you have to be eating whatever you want when you are hungry AND you have to genuinely be ok with the fact that if later rolls around and you still want the food, that its ok to eat it, and not try to deny yourself.
YES! I ran into this over the weekend. My husband made a wonderful lunch on Saturday but it was NOT what I wanted at all (usually I manage the meals, therefore we have what I'm wanting). I ate it but was VERY unsatisfied and actually felt like I hadn't eaten at all! so I ate again even though I wasn't hungry. Yes insert mortification emoticon here. But you know what? then I was satisfied and I was good to go. It was a huge lesson to me and I'm not going to do this in the future. I feel like we all need to go through these trying times and experiences to really 'get it' and then move on with no guilt.

Also, found out this weekend that being in the heat/sun and immediately after work outs (all heated up and sweaty) actually suppresses my appetite quite a bit. I've heard it is different for others but this is how 'my body' reacts and I'm listening to it. so at dinner last night after Zumba when I wasn't eating and the kids asked why, I simply told them that my body was still cooling down after my workout and that I wasn't hungry. I sat with them and enjoyed the conversation while drinking water to help cool down. It's not as awkward as it used to be.
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Old 06-30-2014, 01:22 PM   #207
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I'm a little scared to see my NT this week. I feel like I've gone 2 steps back and have hardly worked on any of her suggestions this week. I feel a sort of apathy right now. In sure shell be disappointed.
It's ok. we've all been there. keep plugging away.

you are the after picture - remember??
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Old 06-30-2014, 05:26 PM   #208
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Have any of you ever felt like you've made "dieting" a hobby? When I have down time and get on the net I find I'm always reading about dieting stuff. I go to this site and find myself reading others posts about how well they are doing (or not doing) and it seems to be what's dragging back into the diet mentality. It's like I don't know what else to read about or do on the net other than looking at dieting stuff. If I say I'm not going to read any of it I honestly don't know what else to do!
YES x 1000. I am just now in the process of clearing out all of the nutrition (i.e. dieting) crap from my life. I don't go anywhere else in this forum except for this page (and I skim through chicks in control for IE related stuff). I no longer go to any nutrition, cooking, or food websites/blogs/forums. The only exception is if I'm looking for a recipe for something I'm hungry for. I try not to click on articles in my facebook feed with titles like "10 super foods that you're not eating" or "Weight loss secrets".

At first I didn't know what to do with myself. I've had to replace it with different things. I go to websites and forums about a video game that I play as a hobby. I work on my master's thesis research. I found a great new series of books to read. I also found some forums for people looking to improve themselves and for anxiety. I love that I can read a book or talk to other people without the subject of food coming up.
*******************************

I've discovered that I need to break from "healthy eating", or any kind of eating that's not just eating what I want. Geneen Roth talks about how she ate cookies (raw and cooked) for a few weeks after she gave herself unconditional permission to eat what she wanted. I now have the ingredients to make cookies on hand in my kitchen- as soon as I get the urge I'm going to eat cookie dough for a meal. It hasn't come yet, but I'm prepared for it.

I've been breaking the bank eating "healthy" food for the last few months. Fresh organic vegetables, meat, butter, milk, eggs are freaking expensive here in the bay area. What I really have been wanting to eat every breakfast and lunch is a sandwich. So I go into a local deli I walk by when I walk to work and I get a big sandwich ($6). I eat half for breakfast and the other half for lunch. That's a work week full of breakfast/lunch for $30- and it's good quality and delicious. It's simple and it doesn't require me to think ahead.

I decided over the weekend that I'm just not going to care anymore about food. I mean the planning, the anxiety about nutrition, how it effects my body, etc. Food is just food. If I want to eat cheerios for breakfast, a sandwich for lunch, and a burger for dinner I'm not going to care. There is so much other cool stuff out there in the universe to think about other than what I'm going to be eating in a few hours.
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Old 07-01-2014, 08:42 AM   #209
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CountryLiving, yes I've suffered with this hobby for many years not creeps up on you little by little and before you know it you're wearing devices, reading several weight loss sites and magazines, writing down your weight, food, calories, exercise, measurements etc. it becomes a very unhealthy obsession. I bought the current issue of Women's Health, a magazine I used to love and there was an article in it about how sugar is evil, yes, evil! I can't buy that magazine anymore and have let go of all of them except Health which isn't so bad.

Locke, I too have to release myself from thinking about food these days. I've had to restructure my day to release myself from some of the pressures of food activities which include shopping, cooking, prepping, dish washing, feeding my son, and meal planning. I'm learning to consolidate my shopping, delegate more responsibilities to my husband, cook simpler meals, and eat out more. I've also stopped wearin my pedometer which is a huge thing for me.
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Old 07-01-2014, 01:30 PM   #210
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I also agree with Locke though my "I just can't do this anymore" attitude is helping me get over the diet obsession I had (still have?). It will take time and maybe you need to really hit rock bottom with dieting. I seriously just cannot do it anymore.

I still read food blogs though - mostly GF ones because I love to cook and bake and need help converting things to GF (none of them are about "diets" or low cal or low fat). It is a hobby of mine that I will not give up. It makes me happy.

@locke: I'm going to be honest. The first time I read one of Geenen's books (maybe like 2 -3 years ago) and read that cookie dough story - I went WTH and ditched it like a hot potato. I thought she was NUTS. But I hadn't reached rock bottom yet on dieting and the yo-yo weight loss/gain. This time I have and now it totally and utterly makes sense in my brain. I keep a tub of GF chocolate chip cookie dough in my fridge. I eat it when I want it and I'm hungry!

@Wannabeskinny: I was going to say something about you not wearing your fitbit anymore. How does it make you feel? I'm still on the fence about mine. Mostly because it doesn't track ALL movement - only steps. I found myself only at 6K yesterday even after a grueling kosama workout. I just went - "meh" about it. I worked hard so what if I didn't get 10K steps. so I just use it to see how things are going but I don't feel guilty about not doing 10K steps at all. How was your appointment at the ND yesterday?
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