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Intuitive Eating: March 2014

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Old 03-05-2014, 09:07 AM   #1
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Default Intuitive Eating: March 2014

Hope nobody minds a monthly IE thread.

So how goes it everyone? I've been having a rough time the past few days. I've put my scale in the basement and itching to get on it but I haven't yet. I'm almost completely certain I've gained a pound or two and I just know that getting on the scale will make me want to beat myself up over it. No, better not!
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Old 03-05-2014, 12:41 PM   #2
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We used to wait till we got to 500 posts but a monthly one is ok too.
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Old 03-06-2014, 08:06 AM   #3
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I think the monthly thread is a good idea. In the past I've seen people post that they are interested in IE but are a bit overwhelmed with all the posts. For some reason they feel compelled to read all of them!

Yesterday was the first day of Lent, and I have made the decision to give up wine for the duration. I'm not thinking of it as a restriction as much as a penance, and I will allow myself to have it when Lent is over.

I ate a very small breakfast yesterday morning (about 8:00 a.m.) before going to my new job. It was only yogurt and a banana. I only worked 5 hours (10-3) and we just take a short break. We can take a longer break if we want and go out to eat, but what's the point? I mean, it's only 5 hours, so I just bring my coffee & drink a cup during my break.

I'd already told my husband I wanted to go to a local restaurant that was having a 25% discount on all their fish and seafood items, so we did that around 4:00 p.m. We ran a short errand before that and by the time we got there I was famished! Truly & completely hungry. He'd only eaten a small lunch and was pretty hungry as well. We both got the fish & chips, something that's not even on the menu but was mentioned on the 25% off email offer I got. Even the waiter didn't know they had it! It was fried tilapia filets, french fries, and cole slaw. Man, it was delicious - and I think the fact that I was soooo hungry made it even more so.

It is really nice to be able to eat what you want when you are truly hungry. And in the past I would have been freaking out to let myself get that hungry because of my fear of "overeating." I ate both filets (probably about 7 oz total), most of the cole slaw and about half of the fries. When the waiter asked if we wanted a dessert we declined. No way; I was completely full. And the best thing was that I didn't want or need another thing to eat before bed. Here's where giving up the wine makes such a difference - even one glass will find me looking for a salty snack to eat with it.

I can imagine all the low-carb people here would think "BREADED FISH??? and FRENCH FRIES?? HORRORS!!!" But it was absolutely delicious and completely satisfied me. Had I eaten baked fish, salad, and string beans I'd have been scrounging all night for something else to eat.
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Old 03-06-2014, 08:22 AM   #4
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Thanks for chiming in SouthernMaven. I don't fault you at all for eating that fish. You got so much enjoyment out of it and all for the price of a few calories? Well done.

I'm learning how to enjoy food so much more now. The experience of eating is more complete now than it ever has been before. There is a beginning, there is a middle, there is an end, and then there is the aftermath of enjoying a full stomach but not so full that I can't do anything. Before I was doing IE I was eating till exhaustion. I was overeating without realizing it, just by finishing everything in my plate. The edge of a plate is not a very good parameter to go by though is it?

So now after dinner I have energy enough to do dishes. wha???? Before I was always piling them in the sink and leaving them for morning when I had energy. Now I wake up in the morning to a clean kitchen and I must say what a nice orderly feeling that is.

I'm also doing some hard work on not berating my appearance. I've set up a praise jar - each time I find myself starting to say something nasty to myself "look how fat I am" for example - I stop myself and scold that nasty voice and then give myself a compliment. And I put a bit of change or a dollar in the jar. I don't know when and what I'll do with that money though.

Last night my mother visited me in my dream to tell me how fat I've gotten. I woke up feeling awful. This is a difficult battle and now it's manifesting itself in my dreams, is there no escape lol!?
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Old 03-06-2014, 09:07 AM   #5
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Hi all,
I'm new to this forum but not new to IE. I've gone back and read many of your IE threads. WannabeSkinny...your posts could be mine as I related to you a lot!

I discovered IE about 1.5 years ago and read several of the books. I've tried many times to implement it and ended up back to dieting. Low Carb seems to be my go to diet. Sadly I've tried LC a zillion times and never last on it even though it gives me much energy which is why I always felt the need to try it "just one more time". Last week I had tried to give LC a go again and failed again and after a "mental" breakdown about dieting and what a failure I am at it and how I'm heavier now than I have been in the last 10 years I've come to terms with it all and say ENOUGH IS ENOUGH. I AM DONE DIETING. All they have done is make me fatter and destroyed my self esteem.

I got my Overfed Head book back out and have be rereading it and it's so so so freeing. I feel like the weight of the world has been lifted off my shoulders and wonder why I have been torturing myself all these years with diet after diet when the answer is just eat when hungry and stop when full. I know the answer is not so easy but just not having to plan the food and think about every morsel that goes in my mouth whether it's allowed or not is freeing!

I have been at IE for about 4 days now. I have been stepping on the scale just to see what is happening and it is going down. I really need to put the scale away though as I can easily turn IE into another diet if I let it.

I'm glad to join you all here on this journey!

Barb
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Old 03-06-2014, 09:24 AM   #6
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Welcome and thank you for joining us! How did you find us can I ask?

I hear that people go back on diets with IE and I don't blame you, low carb has been my go-to form of self torture for long enough to recognize why. It's hard to let go of the mindset more than the other types of diets. At this point I'd rather binge than do a diet. Learning to let go that way is not easy, but I'm learning to be much gentler on myself.

IE is a very different type of approach and if I were to objectively observe where've you've gone wrong I'd say that it's only because you lack compassion for yourself. In order for IE to work you have to be really nice to yourself and work very hard at aleviating your stress and anxiety. You have to lock up that dog in the room otherwise it will be all over you! Of course it's impossible to keep stress at bay for long, but it helps me to do some chi gong and meditating. I've also been reading a journaling book called Beautiful You and it gives guided journaling exercises every day geared towards self acceptance. I find that it helps me alot.
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Old 03-06-2014, 11:19 AM   #7
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Well I've been to this site many times checking out the LC forums and just happen to see the IE forum while browsing around.

You are very right about having self compassion. I've hated my body for so many years even though it has given me 3 precious children and tolerated all I've put it through. Working on loving me for me and stopping the negative self talk have been areas I know I need to work on.

I just ate an early lunch because I am hungry! Before I would make myself wait until 12 because that's when you "should" eat lunch and then I'd overeat because of being so hungry. I'm also dealing with a headache today. I think it's a hormonal one. In the past I've always tried to deal with them by eating everything around me knowing it wasn't going to take it away. Today I will try other remedies other than food!

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Old 03-06-2014, 11:53 AM   #8
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Quote:
Originally Posted by CountryLiving View Post
Hi all,
I'm new to this forum but not new to IE. I've gone back and read many of your IE threads. WannabeSkinny...your posts could be mine as I related to you a lot!

I discovered IE about 1.5 years ago and read several of the books. I've tried many times to implement it and ended up back to dieting. Low Carb seems to be my go to diet. Sadly I've tried LC a zillion times and never last on it even though it gives me much energy which is why I always felt the need to try it "just one more time". Last week I had tried to give LC a go again and failed again and after a "mental" breakdown about dieting and what a failure I am at it and how I'm heavier now than I have been in the last 10 years I've come to terms with it all and say ENOUGH IS ENOUGH. I AM DONE DIETING. All they have done is make me fatter and destroyed my self esteem.

I got my Overfed Head book back out and have be rereading it and it's so so so freeing. I feel like the weight of the world has been lifted off my shoulders and wonder why I have been torturing myself all these years with diet after diet when the answer is just eat when hungry and stop when full. I know the answer is not so easy but just not having to plan the food and think about every morsel that goes in my mouth whether it's allowed or not is freeing!

I have been at IE for about 4 days now. I have been stepping on the scale just to see what is happening and it is going down. I really need to put the scale away though as I can easily turn IE into another diet if I let it.

I'm glad to join you all here on this journey!

Barb
Barb - Welcome!

Substitute calorie counting for low-carb and your post could have been mine. Calorie counting was always my go-to diet and when I think back on the mental gymnastics I went through every day to stay within my calorie range I am amazed that I even participated in such self-torture. It was all about the calories, you know - not whether or not I was hungry and what I was truly hungry FOR. As long as I stayed within the all-important allotment I was being so good. And when I ate more than I should have for that day - likely because I was downright STARVING - the self-flagellation was intense.

How insane it all is, really. It is so nice to finally let go of all that.
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"As I cleared out the clutter of diet propaganda that had expanded
to fill every available convolution of my brain, the fat went away with it."

- Rob Stevens, The Overfed Head


Insanity: doing the same thing over and over again and expecting different results.
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Old 03-06-2014, 05:42 PM   #9
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Quote:
think the fact that I was soooo hungry made it even more so.
Exactly.
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Old 03-07-2014, 05:16 PM   #10
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I'm at the part of Overcoming Overeating Where I have to stock up on foods. Just thinking about it makes me anxious. I'm ashamed to go out and buy all that. What will my husband think? I'm going to gain weight for sure. I'm feeling a lot of stress over this and doubting if I can go through with it. I'm going to binge for sure. Has anyone gone through with this and come out the other end unscathed??
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Old 03-07-2014, 05:38 PM   #11
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I stocked up on all sorts of junk lthis past Monday. Donuts, Oreos, ice cream, etc. my kids were in heaven! My kids are IE naturally so they can eat a little of it and be satisfied. It's amazing how you don't crave all the junk when you give your self permission. I told myself all week if I wanted to eat nothing but donuts for lunch that was ok.....but that never sounded good. You really have to be honest with yourself and give full permission. Good luck!
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Old 03-07-2014, 05:43 PM   #12
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Wannabeskinny View Post
I'm at the part of Overcoming Overeating Where I have to stock up on foods. Just thinking about it makes me anxious. I'm ashamed to go out and buy all that. What will my husband think? I'm going to gain weight for sure. I'm feeling a lot of stress over this and doubting if I can go through with it. I'm going to binge for sure. Has anyone gone through with this and come out the other end unscathed??
Wannabe, I've always had a fair amount of my favorite foods around, mainly because they are also my husband's favorites. So I really didn't have to do what she suggests as most of my favorites are already here.

When I read that, however, I thought - that's going to be difficult for a lot of people to do. I am not surprised it causes you stress. Frankly, I don't really think it's necessary, and I've never seen that suggestion in any other material I've read about IE.

I am still of the opinion that each person has to approach IE in their own way. For example, I love the Overfed Head, but I don't pay any attention to Rob Steven's hunger/fullness chart. Doesn't work for me at all. Love Susanna Dee's book but I refuse to journal. Lots of people LOVE Geneen Roth's books on IE, and I think they are pretty much worthless.

If you're not comfortable with stocking your house, I don't see any reason to do it. Perhaps you can revisit that idea at a later date.
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"As I cleared out the clutter of diet propaganda that had expanded
to fill every available convolution of my brain, the fat went away with it."

- Rob Stevens, The Overfed Head


Insanity: doing the same thing over and over again and expecting different results.
- Albert Einstein
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Old 03-08-2014, 09:36 AM   #13
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I stocked up on all sorts of junk lthis past Monday. Donuts, Oreos, ice cream, etc. my kids were in heaven! My kids are IE naturally so they can eat a little of it and be satisfied. It's amazing how you don't crave all the junk when you give your self permission. I told myself all week if I wanted to eat nothing but donuts for lunch that was ok.....but that never sounded good. You really have to be honest with yourself and give full permission. Good luck!
This is something I've experienced a lot lately. Upon reflection, I think that perhaps this is what they are aiming for in OO when they tell you to stock up on your favorites. If everything is there, it becomes your responsibility to decide what - if any - of these foods are going to be what you REALLY crave in order to satisfy hunger.

When I'm really, truly hungry there are things that STILL will not satisfy me. Most of the time I need some type of protein. Things like donuts, cakes, cookies, etc won't do the trick. I've found myself opening and closing the pantry and/or refrigerator door and walking away, truly puzzled as to what I want to eat. If everything is available, and nothing is off-limits, it's surprising how often I reject the very items I craved when I was dieting.
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"As I cleared out the clutter of diet propaganda that had expanded
to fill every available convolution of my brain, the fat went away with it."

- Rob Stevens, The Overfed Head


Insanity: doing the same thing over and over again and expecting different results.
- Albert Einstein
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Old 03-10-2014, 11:38 AM   #14
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Hello IE'ers,

I'm back to IE once again. Went through a few weeks of dieting craziness. I went full on ketogenic, then no oil whole foods vegan, then paleo. I was so frustrated and angry at myself for not having control and bingeing after restricting my calories down to 1200/day. It didn't help that my doctor recommended 1200 per day. I weigh around 375 and am quite active for my size... I walk over an hour every day for my commute, put in 12 hour days, etc.

1200 calories per day DOES NOT WORK FOR ME. Neither does restricting the types of food that I eat. It's so easy to fall into the dieting mentality of CARBS = BAD or MEAT = BAD. I'm so sick of it. So I went to the grocery store and told myself I can buy whatever I want: no meticulously crafted menu that is controlled for calories, micronutrients, or macronutrients. I just went to the store and picked what looked good. It turns out about 90% of the foods I picked were nutritious. The rest were treats.

I put the candies and trail mix treats that I bought in their own separate cupboard so they're not always on display with the other stuff in the pantry. I know they are there and I can have them whenever I feel like it. I had two small pieces of chocolate and about a tablespoon of trail mix over the weekend. It turns out that I tend to like just have a bite of something when I have a sweet tooth.

Last night I made dinner for my roommate and I. Pork chops, fresh corn bread, and brussels sprouts with real butter. I made up a small plate for myself and ate until I was satisfied. I was a little hungry when I went to bed but I didn't feel the need to eat anything more. I'm always a little bit amazed when I do this way of eating. It's so neat to be able to trust myself. When I'm dieting I can't have candy, cookies, or munchie stuff in the house. I'll lose control and eat everything then hate myself. I just need to remember this feeling so I don't go back to being a diet dictator and causing real harm to myself and my body.

Last edited by Locke : 03-10-2014 at 11:54 AM.
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Old 03-10-2014, 12:32 PM   #15
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Once again.

A repeat that helps me.

This is a guest post written by Skwigg. This girl is a walking dictionary of food and nutrition facts, has read and tried MULTIPLE fitness plans, and every time I check, she’s read another “hot of the press” diet book. And, she tells it like it is.

skwigg

Well, it took like 25 years of trial and error, but I am a happy eater. I follow no rules. I count no calories. I’m completely over nutrient ratios, meal timing and measuring cups. Plus, as an added bonus, I’m not fat. Any time I’ve flirted with this “intuitive eating” stuff before, I’ve quickly become too fat for my little pants. This time I’m gradually losing. I’m 5’8″ and weigh 135-137 most days. I don’t know my percentage of body fat. It’s possible that I’m losing muscle and brains. I’m not concerned enough to get out the calipers. My Tanita scale tells me that I’m between 14% and 24% body fat. Helpful, eh? It’s like asking a Magic 8 Ball. The readout may as well say “Concentrate and ask again.” Or “Signs point to yes.” All I know is that my yoga pants are loose! Woohoo!

So, why did intuitive eating work this time when it’s destroyed my abs so many times before? I’ve been trying to figure that out. I know that in the past I’ve used intuitive eating as an excuse to binge. I’d turn to it after a bout of really restrictive dieting, or when I couldn’t face my nutrition software, or when I wasn’t accountable to a trainer. My “intuition” would tell me to eat boxes of glazed donuts and sheets of cookies. I’d gain weight, scoff at the total lameness of this “embrace your inner cow” intuitive hoody-hoo, and go right back to obsessive dieting, tracking and measuring. I wrote down every single thing I ate or drank for TWO YEARS. That was not fun, and actually not helpful.

I’m more relaxed now. I don’t make food decisions from a place of frustration and panic. My intuition really likes strawberries. I eat chocolate every day. I like bagels. I like to eat out. I’m not limiting myself to dieter food but I’m very aware of portions. I eat one Cadbury Egg, not six. I eat mini-bagels, not those bakery bagels the size of my head. I understand that a typical restaurant serving is enough to feed four people.

Last time I tried intuitive eating, portion control was my downfall. I believed those books that said to eat as many cookies as I wanted and that eventually I wouldn’t want as many. Right!! Weeks later, I still wanted every cookie that had ever been baked. I was reeling out of control on a blood sugar rollercoaster. The more junk I ate, the more junk I wanted. I was never able to pull it together enough to even maintain my weight, much less lose.

Some things that really helped me this time:

- I weigh myself every day. If you’re not going to count calories or measure your food, you’d better be keeping an eye on something. It could be weight, waist measurement, a caliper pinch, a pair of jeans, but you need some kind of objective feedback. If you choose not to track your food and not to look at any of your measurements, then you’d better go buy some fat pants.

- I eat what I want but I always control portions. Generally, the more I want something, the more I need to watch out. I can play fast and loose with spinach but I’d better take my ice cream in a single-serving container.

- I share. I never used to share before. Sharing is the greatest thing ever! You get to eat whatever you want and make everyone around you fat. Try it! Order the double-fudge super cookie dough caramel delight. Eat three bites and watch your dining companions devour the rest of it like hungry hyenas. Share your French fries. Split the sandwich. Order three tacos and only eat one of them. It’s exhilarating! Plus, I always have great leftovers.

- I strike a nice balance of healthy food and treats. You can’t eat an all-treat diet and look or feel very good. I eat loads of fresh fruits and vegetables every day. I love whole grains. I eat nuts and seeds like I’m a squirrel. I’m a sucker for a big salad. I enjoy lean protein as long as it’s not forced upon me every 2-3 hours. I eat a lot of healthy whole foods but I like to add a Pop Tart or Reese’s Peanut Butter Cup for good measure.

- I don’t eat six times per day, or three times per day, or three meals and two snacks. I don’t follow anybody else’s rules because how does the book or the calculator know what I’m doing or when I’m going to be hungry? It doesn’t. So, I eat when I feel like it. On an active, hungry day I might eat 5-6 times. On a lazy day with restaurant food, I might eat 2-3 times. I’m no longer dumb enough try to force three more meals after lunch at The Cheesecake Factory.

- I grasp the importance of good nutrition. I’m not knocking diet plans or nutrition programs, especially if you’re trying to achieve a sports performance or body comp goal. A little bit of structure can be good. I base my eating on the healthy principles I’ve learned but I don’t allow myself to become a slave to the details. And don’t believe that I can eat as many cookies as I want and still lose weight. Big derrrr there!

- I flow. That’s significant because I used to battle. I battled my weight. I struggled with willpower. I waged a war against fat. I fought with the numbers. I kicked myself when I slipped. My mindset was one big bloody massacre. My fitness goals were always at odds with what I really wanted, which was to relax and eat Cheetos. Now, if I want to relax and eat Cheetos, I do so immediately. No struggle. No stress. No guilt. I know that for my next meal I’ll choose something a little more ab-friendly.
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