100 lb. Club - Having a bit of a downer :(




View Full Version : Having a bit of a downer :(


starbrite
10-18-2010, 03:46 PM
Gosh - this is hard. I have been on my new WOE since April 9th 2010. I have been very successful and have generally felt great about the achievements I have made - 74 lbs in 6 months. However, I seem to have hit a wall. I know I should be around 155lbs, which means another 69lbs to go. It isn't really the figures involved, more the thought that to reach my goal will mean probably, at least another year. I feel a wee bit spent. I have not cheated, have stayed OP and have been really true to my desires to lose weight. I guess what I am trying to air is the thought that there is still such a long way to go! My immediate family are supportive, but I still come in from a full days work and cook them the food that they want and then cook my own. My brother gets married in May next year, and I would like to be at least another 40 lbs down by then. Just not sure how I can sustain this strength.
I don't need a lecture, just perhaps a hug, some support and advice how to keep my mental fortitude, which feels weak at the moment. Before you ask (and you know who you are, I am not looking ofr an excuse to give up !)
I just know this is a mental fight, and that I have to truly conquer the food demons that have lead me to be so obese. I started with a BMI of 47 and am now at nearly 35. I know there's been a huge improvement in my health, but I just am feeling vulnerable and a tiny bit scared :?: Any advice or support from anyone who has gone through the same battle, would be so appreciated.


Onederchic
10-18-2010, 03:57 PM
You have done amazing!! I know how difficult this road can be, hang in there :hug::hug:

RobinD
10-18-2010, 03:59 PM
Congratulations on your success so far! :carrot:

My hubby (who is a string bean with the metabolism of a jackrabbit on crack) shows his support by eating the same things I cook for myself - he just gets more of it. I work from home and cannot even imagine coming home and cooking two different sets of food. I don't do that now. Hubby (and DS when he's around) have benefited insofar as the food I cook is high quality (in my world, frozen veggies and things like yogurt are about as close to packaged/processed as it gets.) We don't eat pasta or white rice, but hubby likes potatoes so those are on the menu regularly. If we have bread it's something like Ezekiel or Dave's Killer Bread with lots of whole grains - high quality bread calories. I don't have much of it, but it's better for hubby, too.

What I'm getting at is, perhaps with some tweaking you can come up with a way that you can cook for everyone at once? I'd hate having to stare across the table at things that I can't eat - I'd feel deprived. Your family may have to make some concessions, but... well... if they don't like it, the kitchen's in there. :p


sept15lija
10-18-2010, 04:06 PM
Hugs to you! It is such a long road. I've been at this 4 months and I'm feeling good but sometimes I get tired too. Sometimes the demons whisper to me, I assume that will never change. In terms of your day, is there any way you can cook yourself and your family the same food so you don't have to make two meals? That sounds like a lot of work! In terms of keeping your motivation, do clothes motivate you? What if you went out and bought a nice dress to wear to your brother's wedding that will fit you in 30 pounds or so? That way your goal is doable and it might keep you focused. Clothes are a huge motivator for me. Good luck, and keep posting!! :)

Sea
10-18-2010, 04:07 PM
You have accomplished so much that you KNOW you can and will reach goal. You've worked too hard to waste it now.

Take yourself shopping! You don't have to buy anything, but try on every outfit you'd have loved to wear, but couldn't, when you started this journey. See what you've accomplished and enjoy that accomplishment. :)

jigglefree
10-18-2010, 04:08 PM
:hug: I do understand how you feel. I have a family that I cook for but had to start cooking the same meal for everyone. I'm a calorie counter and I will usually have about 400-500 calories available for dinner and I generally eat about 300-400. You have done well so far so now you may want to do a little tweaking to see how things go.

Rochester
10-18-2010, 06:25 PM
I started at almost exactly the same time (April 12) but have only lost half of what you have. You're rocking it, girlfriend. :D You deserve both applause :cp: and hugs. :hug:

This IS a long journey. It's difficult and challenging and tedious and frustrating. But it is so worth it!

Some suggestions to motivate you:

Make a list of why you started this journey. Remember all the things that you couldn't do 75 pounds ago.

Reward yourself. Buy a piece of jewelry that is symbolic of your success. Get a massage or manicure. Buy a new pair of shoes. (New shoes make anything better! ;)) Take yourself on a date - go to a museum or film, buy a ridiculously expensive cup of coffee, window shop in a neighborhood where you could never afford a single thing, buy yourself flowers.

Find a new workout to try. Something fun or unusual or that you absolutely were incapable of doing when you were 75 pounds heavier.

Dream shop. Get catalogs or go to online sites and find all kinds of glamorous outfits that are going to look amazing on you someday soon!

xty
10-18-2010, 06:32 PM
*hugs*

First and most importantly - you are doing an amazing job! I really hope you never lose sight of how truly far you have come, even when the road ahead feels long and slow. Very impressive and motivational :)

Now. I overheard another trainer at my gym say something to a client that had whined "I cant!". The trainer replied, "you dont even know what you cant do yet". I love that. It reminded me that we all far, far more strength that we acknowledge.

You can do this. And maybe dont put yourself on *such* a tight schedule! Sometimes it feels like all I have in me just to eat well, work out, go to work, and ya know generally thrive. It can be exhausting, but you can do it. And you will.

If you only lose 20 or 30 lbs before the wedding or if your total weight loss takes 10 years instead of 1....none of it really matters.

If you have changed your life, the hard work is already done. The rest is just a matter of continued execution. Keep it up, and remember its ok to feel exhausted by it all :)

Nikki6kidsmom
10-19-2010, 12:46 AM
First off your doing awesome and just being frustrated and stressed out be a factor in a stall so vent away.

My advice would be change it up. Your exercise program and try to get in some new and different healthy food. Changing theses things can help the scale start to move again. I have had several stalls and have found when I change things up and focus on health not weight things slowly start up again.

You will get there just stay focused. You have already done a fabulous job and you can do this!!

Jojo381972
10-19-2010, 01:19 AM
Congrats on your success thus far! You have achieved so much!

Keep it up! Look at it as baby steps, and you'll be there in no time. Hugs!

katy trail
10-19-2010, 01:27 AM
this. is. why. i love this site.

i was kinda feeling down today too. not depressed, but not motivated. a real change since i've been super motivated this past week.

reading this reminds my emotional self of my success. i knew it, but those emotions go. eh. blah blah is never enough. housework is never enough. just annoyances. BUT reading these kinds of posts help me feel better too.

starbrite
10-19-2010, 02:17 AM
Thanks everyone. It's not about a stall. It's not about cooking two meals. It's about fear and a tremendous desire to continue the success and Get The Job DONE !
* years ago I lost all but 30lbs of the same weight I have lost now. I then began to put it back on slowly, and ended up at 298 again. I'm scared to reach goal, scared to try to maintain and I KNOW I CAn, I'm really not saying I can't more, I'm scared and feeling very vulnerable.
Thanks to you all, it is so helpful to look at my emotional dilemma through your eyes.
:grouphug:

Rosinante
10-19-2010, 04:31 AM
I understand where you're coming from. Not only have I once got right down to target and once got damn near there, and regained vast amounts, I too have this sense of how much more I've got to go weighing rather heavily on me too. For example, I was posting in the "6 months from now" thread, which is a fine thread but when I did the maths I worked out that that's more months than I've already done, and if I continue to lose weight at the rate I am, I Still won't be at target. And yes, that's a bit of a sigh....

Have a :hug:.

shannonmb
10-19-2010, 07:40 AM
WOW, you are doing so great!!! Just keep thinkin' about how happy, proud, and healthy you will feel when you reach your goal!!!

I know you just want to get the job DONE! But is the job ever done?

Beverlyjoy
10-19-2010, 07:51 AM
You are doing GREAT. Sorry you are feeling a little weary of it all. This journey is long and sometimes relentless. You are entitled to feel frustrated now and then. You have gotten some great ideas so far. Give yourself a mental hug and here's one from me. :hug:

Carry on.

Diana3271
10-19-2010, 08:36 AM
starbrite I was talking to a friend the other day. I have been very overweight most of my life. I am comfortable being over weight. I know where to shop and how to shop. All of this regular sized stuff is new for me and quite scary. Don't even get me started on maintenance. Can I do this for the rest of my life? Again very scary. I don't know if I can do it. I will have to take one day at a time. A new restaurant opened up in town. I went online to look at their menu. There is nothing at that place that is in my calorie ranges, etc. Can I do this for the rest of my life? All I know, again I will have to take one day at a time. I have a lot more energy than anyone around me. I like that feeling. Starbrite, just think about all the positives you are feeling about your weight loss. Take one day at a time. If that is too overwhelming, just concentrate on your next meal or your next workout. :hug:

Eliana
10-19-2010, 10:28 AM
* years ago I lost all but 30lbs of the same weight I have lost now. I then began to put it back on slowly, and ended up at 298 again. I'm scared to reach goal, scared to try to maintain and I KNOW I CAn, I'm really not saying I can't more, I'm scared and feeling very vulnerable.

Oh, I bet that's exactly where all this is coming from. It's hard losing weight you already lost once. I hated the loss from 235 down to 183, my previous success weight. It just felt like drudge work and work I shouldn't have to do, like it was not fair. It's hard to stop the "it's not fair" demon. Once you get past that line in the sand, I bet you will soar!

It's definitely a long process. But very soon now you will be at a place where you really don't care that you still have more to lose because you will find yourself happy right where you are! Everything past that is just gravy. ;)