Weight Loss Support - Did you tell?




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onagain1
04-24-2010, 06:01 PM
So, I am at the beginning of this weight loss journey, and while I really don't see a difference in my body, I've already had someone ask me if I was losing weight. I was pretty shocked because I've only lost 8 lbs so far, which is a drop in the ocean compared to what I really need to lose. I made a joke about the shirt I was wearing and laughed it off without ever answering the question.

I haven't told anyone that I am trying to lose weight. Even at home, I "sneak" around to get the nutritional info off of the food to try and get it while no one is watching. It's like I don't want anyone to know the amount of hard work and effort that this is taking so that if I fail, no one will pity me or see me as a failure.

So my question is - Did you tell? How did you feel about people asking about your weight loss? I just find the whole thing so awkward! And obviously, people are going to notice. I want them to notice, I just don't want to have to talk about it! :dizzy:


KyAngel1975
04-24-2010, 06:22 PM
I don't know maybe I'm just different but I want everyone to know I am dieting. I love it when coworkers ask how much have you lost now? Or when they ask what I'm having for dinner... etc... It keeps me motivated and it keeps me accountable for what I am doing. (I couldn't possibly stop this with everyone knowing what I am doing) thats how I think... My hubby and daughter is dieting with me and my little boy is not but hes only 4 lol, give it time, his genetics will kick in... :)

Trinity1004
04-24-2010, 06:23 PM
I have told everyone possible this time around. I have even posted many times on FB about my journey. At first I wondered what the heck I was thinking because if I did screw up and go off the deep end people would think I was weak. I must say, for me, it was THE BEST choice i've made so far. I have had several people asking me constantly how my diet is going and it is keeping me very accountable, something I must have really needed because this is the longest i've ever been on a diet (going on 4 months)! Apperently only losing 40 pounds has even inspired a lot of my Facebook friends to diet and workout too! I get e-mails daily people encouraging me and asking for advice and recipes. I started a recipe blog on FB so my friends have some healthy meals for the whole family. I love that "everyone" knows!!


Coondocks
04-24-2010, 06:24 PM
I actually started doing all the same things, but realized that working towards a healthier you is nothing to hide, its something to be proud of.
Plus, it lets other people be able to be a support to you and know it's Ok to throw those compliments your way. :)
I get what you mean by awkward though, when some one has asked me are you trying to lose weight or have you lost . . . or something to the like I've started answering with Im getting healthy, that's just been a bonus :)

Kudos to you for beginning this journey!! You've come to a great place for support.

Renwomin
04-24-2010, 07:31 PM
I definitely told my SO and he is very supportive of my efforts though he has always told me I was beautiful and attractive even at my heaviest. It is very good that he knows because while he is very considerate he might not have picked up on my efforts and not thought to be considerate.

My best friend knows, but she is also dieting and we are supporting each other.

Now that I am starting to lose more weight I'm starting to clue others in like my close family and some other friends.

At first I didn't tell a lot of people though. I'm relatively private with personal information to just acquaintances (the internet doesn't count, right? :^:) Along with privacy, part of me wanted to see when someone noticed I had lost weight. If they ask I definitely let them know how much I've lost. I'm proud of every pound! There also was part of me that didn't want to admit to failure if I decided that the new changes were too stressful.

CJZee
04-24-2010, 07:43 PM
I don't tell anyone. I do not want people starting to watch and comment about what I eat -- or, if they do, I do not want to contribute to it. If someone asks me if I have lost weight, I tell them I'm exercising more ... thus totally avoiding the weight-loss question.

I have told my fiance since, even after 70 pounds, he hadn't noticed, LOL! (I am actually glad if people don't notice the weight loss, and just think I look "better". It says to me I still look like "me" and I am happy with that.)

time2lose
04-24-2010, 09:15 PM
I didn't tell anyone at first. I had failed so many times that I wanted to be sure that I would stick with it before telling anyone. Before long I had to tell my family. It is hard to keep your food secret from the people you live with. I did not tell anyone else until I was well along on my journey and my loss was apparent. Now I just act like everyone knows I eat healthy. You can't hide a large loss.

Shmead
04-25-2010, 02:06 PM
I don't tell people, but I don't treat it as a secret: i.e., I won't eat something I shouldn't just so they don't know I am dieting. I go with 'never complain, never explain".

juliastl27
04-25-2010, 02:26 PM
i didnt tell anyone until id lost about 40 lbs. for me, i didnt want everyone constantly asking about it or questioning what i ate.

im glad i went that route and it worked for me.

p.s. i did tell my husband, but asked him to keep it to himself

bunnythesAINT
04-25-2010, 02:39 PM
I told two people one day when I was getting really frustrated that I wasn't seeing any results. I was like "CAN YOU TELL YET?" and they said yes. Those two buddies are the only people I've told but I'm pretty sure that it's out of the bag now because it's becoming noticeable to people (even to me now, which makes me happy). I, too, kind of sneak around to find nutrition info. I mean do have eating issues and I don't want them to know that I need to put this much effort into losing weight, either. On one hand I do like people telling me I look good, not going to lie, but on the other hand I am embarrassed. I can't explain why, because I really shouldn't be, I guess having people looking at my body close enough to notice that there's been a change is weird because I'm still not at total peace with my body. And I'm a teenager. I'm just tweaky in general.

abreezies
04-25-2010, 03:42 PM
I have told my immediate family and only 2 people at work know. I find it easier at home if my family knows....in a way it keeps me accountable.

Ciao
04-25-2010, 05:44 PM
I told my friends and family because they're giving me support.
It helps a lot more than I thought.
I told them immediately just to get ideas from them, advice, etc.

fatmad
04-25-2010, 06:06 PM
I have told some people. My family needs to know, since I don't want certain foods in the house, or people to eat certain foods that I have planned for my own. I have also told my co-workers, since we potluck quite a bit.
Other people at work have special diet needs, so it is just a matter of asking people to include my diet needs in their thoughts.
I am low carbing, so certainly it shows up that I don't eat certain foods.
I have the added "advantage" that I am pre-diabetic, so I just tell people that I have to watch my sugars and that I have to eat a certain way for my condition.
I too don't tell very many people that I am trying to lose weight. I had lost some last year and regained it, so I am pretty quiet about it this time, and haven't told anyone except my doctor and dietitian how much I have lost.
I am afraid to "jinx" it by bragging on my success.
Maybe if I drop a dress size I will let people know.

BTW, I have had people ask me about weight loss even when I have been gaining, so don't give it much credence. I may be obvious or not, but it could be other things. I tend to reward myself with clothing, so people often notice new and attractive clothes and think that means weight loss.
But hey, anything that helps us to look good is ok. right?

springlover
04-25-2010, 10:16 PM
I also didn't tell a lot of people..Just my bf (I live with him..its hard to hide anything) my mom and 2 of my friends. I mentioned working out more to feel healthier but didn't want people to know so they wouldn't ask me about it but once I loose a good amount I will be more open about it. I have actually never ever told anyone how much I weigh but this website!

xocessy
04-25-2010, 10:51 PM
Like a few people here, I told all my family, friends, and coworkers. I found it to be a lot easier because the more I talk about it, the more I keep motivated. I only got the most positive words from all these people and I even learn tips from them. I do have to say, I never say exactly what weight I am at. I just say what I've lost. I'm comfortable talking about health/fitness but that little tid-bit I save for me and my husband.

eclipse
04-25-2010, 10:57 PM
I didn't tell anyone at all until I was already down 20-30 lbs. After that, it was just my husband. Now that I'm down over 50 lbs, people have really started to notice and I can't hide it from people I see frequently. I really don't want my weight to be a topic of conversation, so it's kind of tough.

Katieee
04-25-2010, 11:51 PM
I didn't start telling people until I had lost 10 pounds and knew I could actually do this.

MyBestYear
04-25-2010, 11:53 PM
Only the closest people in my life know - mom, hubby, sister, best friend -- but ironically, I keep a very public blog and video blog LOL I will 'come out' so to speak one of these days. On one hand it would be cool if everyone knew, but on the other hand it would be cool if I got to my goal THEN people found the blog etc.

The blog helps keep me motivated and accountable though :)

duckyyellowfeet
04-26-2010, 01:54 AM
I told my SO and my roommates. I also told my mom, because she is always supportive.

However, my SO isn't always the best at keeping secrets, so a lot of people knew that I wasn't really telling.

Now, I'm pretty open about it. I bring my own food a lot of places and I've lost enough weight that its pretty obvious.

Lori Bell
04-26-2010, 10:50 AM
I guess for me it really wasn't a big deal. I was so huge, Super morbidly obese to be exact, that I felt people already saw me as a loser, it didn't really matter what they thought anymore. One day I told my husband and kids that I was sick and tired of being fat and unhealthy. I couldn't take it anymore and I was done hiding behind the fat suit. I just did it. I didn't blab it to the world, I just plugged away. I was so huge I didn't get my first comment about weight loss until I had lost around 60 pounds. I was honest about it when people asked and very gracious when anyone noticed. Oh sure, there were s few idiots that said stupid stuff that ticked me off, but I got over it quickly for my own sanity.

I think what made it so much easier this time, and why I was successful at losing 193 pounds was because for once in my life I didn't give a rats a$$ what other people thought. It was all about my health, and staying alive long enough to see my kids grow up.

Beverlyjoy
04-26-2010, 12:18 PM
I didn't tell anyone at first. I had failed so many times that I wanted to be sure that I would stick with it before telling anyone. Before long I had to tell my family. It is hard to keep your food secret from the people you live with. I did not tell anyone else until I was well along on my journey and my loss was apparent. Now I just act like everyone knows I eat healthy. You can't hide a large loss.

It's the same for me as time2lose. Didn't tell folks (except dh) at first. Same reason - I've lost and gained so many times - I just let it be until folks start noticing. Then - as it comes up - I mention it.

RunnerChemist
04-26-2010, 01:58 PM
I told the hubby at the beginning - I knew his support would be crucial. He's a good man, who tells me that I look good no matter what, and he has also lost sizeable weight, so he already knows that I don't want to have my weight be the topic of discussion.

I mentioned it to some people that I work out with, since diet, weight maintenance and exercise came up in conversation. I don't bring it up, but if people want to talk health, nutrition and exercise, I'm game. I really love to talk about food, so discussing healthy food is a good time for me.

WarMaiden
04-26-2010, 02:15 PM
I didn't tell anyone at first, not even my husband, because we were not in a good place in our marriage at the time and I knew he would scoff at the changes I was making with remarks along the lines of, "You can't ever stick to these big changes you say you're going to make." So I kept it to myself.

He noticed within a few weeks that I was changing the way I ate--because the major change I was making was to not eat sugar. And that was a huge change for me. We began talking about it, about a month in, and I urged him to try it out, too. (Which he did--a huge step for him, as he loved his Coke--and thus began his weight/health change.)

My coworkers noticed after a few months. I think I got my first comment about losing weight from one of them after I'd lost about 40 pounds. For the most part, they have not said much, but they have been very encouraging and supportive and understanding. They don't try to press birthday cake on me, etc. I think they all think I'm a little crazy, but it's a kind of crazy they respect ;)

My mom and other relatives of course have noticed and have been very supportive. Close friends as well.

In fact, I have not heard one negative thing from anyone, this whole time. I wonder if that's perhaps about where I live--northern California--where everyone is pretty health-conscious, even if they're not actively doing something about it.

So I guess my answer is, I kept it to myself at the beginning when I was unsure whether I'd be able to stick to it. But once I knew this was really how I would live my life, I relaxed. I still don't go around "informing" people, but if it comes up, I'm open and honest about how I have lost weight.

ninepaw
04-26-2010, 02:40 PM
I've done this more times than I care to try to count, and when I got on the scale a few days ago and saw my highest weight ever(I had been avoiding the scale for a while... Ugh!), I freaked out. It was my huge revalation that got me really paying attention to what I eat and trying to make exercise a part of my life.

That being said, my freak out kind of made it's way onto FB. I'm not a very closed off person when it comes to... Anything. So I said a couple of things when I first had my "ah-hah" moment, and basically everyone I know is aware of what I'm doing. The vast majority of them have been very supportive and I've gotten all kinds of ideas and strategies from them. One person, in my opinion, was extremely condescending in his attempt to get advice, which lead to a big angry argument over FB comments(We're super mature, right??), but it's whatever. Like I said, basically everyone else has been crazy supportive of my descision to make this change in my life. I feel like the support is necessary, and it helps me to feel accountable to more than just myself... Even though in the end the weight loss is only for myself.

mom4life
04-26-2010, 02:56 PM
I had a weight loss buddy 3 months before I became serious about losing. We ended up quitting and talked mostly about the gooood things we ate. Finally when I got serious about it I did tell her but she just shrugged it off, understandably so since we weren't that serious about it before.
I waited to spread the word till I came back from a 2 week vacation where I watched everything I ate and worked out every other day. I didn't weigh-in till I got back home. Turned out I lost 5 lbs. I blasted that info out to everyone on Facebook and the moms group I'm a part of. Everyone was thrilled for me.
From that point I laid low again and didn't say anything because I figured people probably thought "Oh good for her but who hasn't lost 5 lbs only to gain it back." I had a couple people check in on me from time to time to find out if I'd lost more and I'd tell them but they hadn't seen me yet. Finally when I lost a total of 35 lbs I went to a moms meeting and everyone was blown away. Suddenly all everyone wanted to talk about is weight loss. To this day moms are getting together in groups to lose weight.....so awesome!

VeeDeValentine
04-26-2010, 03:00 PM
My best friends- both overweight- knew after i'd started and had already lost half a stone or so, as I'd begun when we were away from each other in holidays. Our friendship changed, and we don't talk anymore...sadly after I lost weight, one became catty and nasty, and out of the blue, the other joined in...
It's a small price a pay for having this confidence to make new friends <3

ma26
04-26-2010, 03:08 PM
I hear you! I have had so many attempts at this weight loss, that I dread someone thinking "oh, ok she's trying to lose weight again" and seriously I shoudl be proud of the fact that I am doing this for my health and wellbeing, and I should tell everyone so I can be accountable. But I understand how you feel. It's like my secret. I want to surprise people and when the pounds start dropping and when I start looking leaner and healthier, I want people to ask me about my weightloss. Not because I told them I am doing it, but because they see it. And when they ask "Wow your looking great what are you doing differently?" I can say "I am taking my health by the reins and running with it. I am eating cleaner and I am making a commitment to move my body so I hve endurance, strength and stamina, and I'm loving it!" I'm pretty excited for when I get to say that :).

JustSharing83
04-26-2010, 03:08 PM
I tell my husband and mom every time I start dieting because they both have an influence on the foods I eat. My husband and I tend to eat together and my mom has us over quite a bit for her incredible cooking.

In the past, I have never been comfortable talking about my weight or my weight loss with others... This time was no different at first. Now that I have lost about 50 pounds since my restart, I have opened up about it. First, I told my co-workers - one was talking about how much weight she'd lost since the new year on Weight Watchers so I talked about how much I had lost as well. Another wanted me to share a pizza, so I explained I was on a diet.

I have been getting a few comments and having people ask how I'm doing it, so I explain that it really can be as simple as calories in versus calories out. Also, I have posted a bit about it on Facebook to help stay accountable.

It's a big step for me to talk about it with people who know me, but since I've had some success, I guess I feel credible and like there's less chance for failure.

Eliana
04-26-2010, 03:15 PM
I just up and asked my cousin how she'd lost 100 lbs, and I started calorie counting the next day. My husband knew I was going for it, but I didn't tell anyone else, more because why should I? What I ate was my business.

Now that it's obvious, everyone knows. Some people ask, some people don't. Some people comment, some people don't. I guess I no longer feel conflicted about whether or not to tell someone, with one exception...my dad. He lives 16 hours away and I want to just surprise him when I see him again. :D Oh, and my mom because she hurt my feelings! I'd lost 27 lbs and she said something stupid and I could not keep my mouth shut. :rolleyes:

jennyplain
04-26-2010, 03:21 PM
I have told everyone and their mom, seriously. From my boss to my friends to my therapist (although, lol, she's my weight loss therapist so...I kind of have to tell her). It is a huge help to have the accountability, for me, and to know that if I fall into old habits, there will be lots of sets of eyes on me wondering why I'm doing it.

Gold32
04-26-2010, 05:47 PM
I'm really an open book in this matter. I don't really care if my coworkers were to ask me questions, or catch me checking nutrion labels. I'm pretty open about it with my hubby, family, and friends. I never really thought about it as an issue. I even have my husband trained to check labels for me, if he goes without me to the store. I've just always been a fairly blunt and honest person, and I try not to let what others think worry me too much. But I can understand your concern, I've learned over the years that my openness is odd.

Maybe as things continue to work out for you, you'll feel more confident and proud, and more willing to talk about it. :)

oodlesofnoodles
04-26-2010, 08:38 PM
I've done this more times than I care to try to count, and when I got on the scale a few days ago and saw my highest weight ever(I had been avoiding the scale for a while... Ugh!), I freaked out. It was my huge revalation that got me really paying attention to what I eat and trying to make exercise a part of my life.

That being said, my freak out kind of made it's way onto FB. I'm not a very closed off person when it comes to... Anything. So I said a couple of things when I first had my "ah-hah" moment, and basically everyone I know is aware of what I'm doing. The vast majority of them have been very supportive and I've gotten all kinds of ideas and strategies from them. One person, in my opinion, was extremely condescending in his attempt to get advice, which lead to a big angry argument over FB comments(We're super mature, right??), but it's whatever. Like I said, basically everyone else has been crazy supportive of my descision to make this change in my life. I feel like the support is necessary, and it helps me to feel accountable to more than just myself... Even though in the end the weight loss is only for myself.

Wow you live in Roseville, CA? I live right by there lol. Small world.

ninepaw
04-26-2010, 09:34 PM
Well hi there! LOL. Small world indeed. ;)