100 lb. Club - Who is your greatest motivator, and your worst saboteur?

10-13-2009, 03:17 PM
Other than yourself of course.;)

For me, my biggest saboteur is my husband. The funny thing is though, he doesn't mean to be. I don't think he even realizes it. He's been better this time, but in the past he would bring me "treats" to reward me for doing a good job. For example he would bring home pizza's for dinner, and a cheesecake for me, since I've been "so good". I've had trouble in the past giving up on the soda, so he would help me by bringing me one home only a few days a week. Then a few would turn into one every morning, which would turn into me just drinking soda all day long. It wasn't his fault, I chose to drink them, but the temptation was there.
This time it's the exercise. I was mentioning that it was a little harder working out on Saturday, since the oldest two kids are home from school all day. They normally play outside just fine, but it's just two more to listen for. He's answer was "well, it's ok if you only work out 2 or 3 days a week, it's something".:rolleyes: He has been much better this time around though, I have to give him props for that. So far there have been no treats, and he asks before he gets me anything to eat.

My biggest motivator oddly enough is one of my 4 year old twins. I find that the easiest time to workout is during naptime for my 2 year old (and if I am really lucky, my 7 month old;) ) while my older two are in school. That leaves me with just the twins. As soon as my two year old goes down, Joshua starts with "mama, it's time to go exercise. Come on mama, let's go get strong." He's very insistent until we go downstairs, where he'll either play with the baby or run around while I work out. All my kids are into hiking as well, so it's really easy to get them out and about when the weather co-operates.

So how about you?

10-13-2009, 03:26 PM
My biggest motivator? Is myself hands down. With my husband and one of my best friends a close second.

My biggest saboteur? I don't really have one. I got rid of those people long long ago ;)

10-13-2009, 03:44 PM
That's so cute your son is helping you out!

I'd say my biggest sabetour is my husband's friend- it got to the point I have asked him to stop coming over and asking us to eat out with him. I'm sure I upset him but honesty coming over 1-2 times a week and suggesting burgers and stuff doesn't help- my husband was a co-conspirator I tell you- I finally had to tell him to stop saying OKAY when his friend came over... He's much better now and doesn't suggest eating out anymore and it's nice- if we do eat out he tells me to pick so I know I can pick options that are better than taco bell and burger king!

Biggest motivator is hard to say- besides myself I'd say my sister- she's always wanting to cook healthy meals, eat at healthy places, and help me find healthy recipes :) My hubby is slowly becoming a motivator because now he'll go bike riding with me and make it more fun :D

10-13-2009, 04:18 PM
My biggest saboteur was my husband (separated) but some of you might already know that, LOL. He used to bring home big boxes (cases) of candy bars and put them on the dresser in our bedroom, or buy cases of Coke (which no one drinks but me) or boxes of those giant Costco muffins. He'd offer to fix me eggs for breakfast and then when I'd say "sure but please JUST eggs in Pam" he would melt butter and scrambled them in that with cream cheese and not tell me. And he would pile his junk all over my exercise bike. I'd move it all and ride, and the next day it would all be piled on there again. Kinda obvious??

My greatest motivator is my best friend. I love him dearly and he sees a "greater me" in me than I see myself (if that makes any sense) so I want to live up to that.

10-13-2009, 04:20 PM
My sister is my biggest motivator, since she has almost the same amount to lose as I do. Neither of us wants to give up or give in to anything before the other. We've been trying out healthy recipes and stuff and we walk together.

My biggest saboteur is my Mother in Law. She lives with me and omg, I cough and she tells me I need to eat more because I'm sick and I need the extra calories... she brings me home non-diet Rt. 44 Sonic cokes, she tries to convince me not to walk. I don't know why she does it but I never do anything she says anyway. :p

10-13-2009, 05:34 PM
My biggest motivator is my boyfriend. He has been nothing but supportive about my exercise and changing of my eating habits. He's even been bringing home healthier snacks for me, when we have movie night (he works at a grocery store, so he does the shopping). Only thing is he loves his trail mix, and it was on sale this past week at his work, and he stocked up. I love it too, but I've been good. It's so salty I know I'd retain water like crazy even if I only had one serving.
Biggest saboteur, only person I can think of is my friend, she's always encouraging me to drink (alcohol), I'm not a big drinker (maybe 3 or 4 times a year, and only a glass or two of wine, or a rye and diet soda). She loves to drink, and last time I visited with her before I came down here, she kept trying to feed me too. She's trying to count calories, and I think she gets overwhelmed with it, and subconsiously tries to bring others down with her. I had to leave that day I went to visit her, when she put a pizza in the oven, after we'd just finished a filling and healthy lunch of salad, and mashed cauliflower.

10-13-2009, 05:35 PM
When I read your title, I immediately thought me.... and me.
Otherwise, my greatest motivator is a coworker. She lost weight and looked great and now I'm smaller than she is and she still looks better than I do (what can I say, the unfairness of weight distribution---she has a waist, I don't).

Sabotuer? It used to be my husband, but I have gotten to where I can resist his food if I want to. I'd say my sisters because when we get together we can EAT. Programmed from way back, I'd say.

10-13-2009, 05:50 PM
My greatest motivator is equal between the regular girls in the Weight Loss Buddies forum here on 3FC and my dad.

My greatest saboteur is myself.

10-13-2009, 05:51 PM
Well, I don't really have anyone to encourage me here. I've lost a lot of weight and I have only had 2 people comment, the lady across the street and a casual friend. I wish I had someone. Sorry, but I am pretty much having a pity party today.

My children work daily to get me off the path. Maybe they are afriad of all the changes around here, but it sure can get frustrating.

10-13-2009, 06:27 PM
my biggest motivator is my sister. since we are both trying to lose weight together it helps that we both can share the journey of weight loss with each other.
my biggest saboteur is myself.. like the saying goes you are your own worst enemy and sometimes i give in to the little voice in my head that wants me to fail... as much as we want to blame it on other people we are the ones who put the food to our mouths and decide to cheat....

10-13-2009, 06:40 PM
I am a returning newbie. I want to pipe in here for some support. My husband last night told me he wants me to lose weight and that" Life is short and I feel like I am being short-changed" ie: he is misisng out on some great life because I am overweight. I think I look pretty good and felt we had a good relationship but now I am MAD as ****. It feels like an ultimatum to me and this is not the first time he has seaid this kind of thing. It makes me want to go buy 4 chocolate bars! HELP! Does he have a right to say this because it is how he feels or is he a jerk who needs the kick to the curb?!

Thighs Be Gone
10-13-2009, 06:56 PM
I don't allow saboteurs! I decapitate them as they rare their ugly, lipsticked heads!

I feel the person that helps me to stay motivated in real life most is my husband. He really has pitched in (and in a major way) so that I could finally make myself the priority rather than everyone else. As a result, things feel more balanced at home and I am in a position now to readily give more than ever before in every way.

10-13-2009, 07:03 PM
My biggest motivator is my mother. She's not exactly "nice" about it...but she does keep me in check :) She's the type to say, "Uh, Amber? Do you really think you need that piece of candy?" (and she's usually right...I dont)

Biggest saboteur? My boyfriend. The sad part is that he actually tries to be supportive (MOST of the time). Unfortunately, when he feels like caving in, he wants to pull me down with him. I think it makes him feel better if he's not the only one cheating on his diet and/or skipping out on exercise. It's the whole..."I'm really tired tonight, babe...how 'bout we take the night off from going to the gym and rent a movie?" Sometimes it's hard to not give in :(

10-13-2009, 07:12 PM
I think I am my own worst enemy when it comes to diet and exercise. Although, my boss comes in a close second with her constant eating and wanting to make every meeting a food related event. And, well, then theres my Grandma who's favorite saying after a huge meal is "there's plenty more, don't be bashful!" She cooks like she thinks she's feeding an army.

My biggest motivator is my ex boyfriends new girlfriend. She works at my gym. I love when she walks by the cardio room and sees me. The look on her face is obvious. She wishes I'd stop, cause I'm looking too good and someone is going to notice and feel some regret...LMAO!

10-13-2009, 08:09 PM
My doctor is my biggest motivator--she told me I was pre-diabetic and boy was that motivating to change!!! My family and friends have been very very supportive so they come in at a close second.

I don't think I have any saboteur's in my life....however it's been awhile since I've visited my family and dad does love to see people eat....but now that he has diabetes maybe he has changed.

10-13-2009, 08:31 PM
greatest motivator- cute, small clothes, sweater dresses, knee high boots, pencil skirts, etc. Cute MEN! They are a big motivator for me too :)

biggest saboteur- myself. i.e. becoming complacent... I start thinking about how hard I've worked and how sick I am of weighing myself every day or watching my food super closely. Thinking that a bite here and a taste here or a weekend of eating whenever/whatever I want is not a big deal.

edited: sorry I didnt read the post said WHO. hmm, I have to say it's me on both counts. I've been kind of going through this process alone (except for my mom)

10-13-2009, 08:45 PM
My biggest motivator is definately my hubby.. esp this time around. He sees me as superwoman and tells me so all the time "Honey, you are the strongest person I know, you can do anything!"

My biggest saboteur? I'm embarrassed to say that it would have to be me, myself and I! Most days I really struggle to stay on plan... I wonder if it would be easier if I didnt' have a houseful of little kids who need to snack every hour or two, and if I wasn't nursing... it seems I want a snack almost every time the baby eats... or maybe I'm just making excuses for being lazy and not being strict enough on myself.

10-13-2009, 11:56 PM
My biggest motivator is definitely my BF. He's been so supportive of my efforts, letting me choose the groceries I want and giving me choices of where to go when we eat out. And at the same time, he's made it clear that he loves me the way I am right now, that the weight doesn't matter to him. If eating healthier and losing weight is making me happy, he's all for it.

I don't really have a saboteur in my life anymore, unless you count his mother, lol. I can't complain, she's done well to accommodate for me whenever we eat at her house by preparing chicken breast instead of more fatty meats, but that's mostly because she knows I don't care for most other meats in general. Seems I really have to watch myself around there though when it comes to desserts!

My worst saboteur used to be my ex though. We fought constantly about food . . . not because I was trying to force him to eat like me, but that he wanted me to join in on all the crap he would gorge on. I'm not sure what the motivation was there, unless he felt guilty about not eating right and didn't want to see me do it, or if he was afraid I might attract the attention of another guy as my figure started to get smaller. Maybe both? Either way, it's such a relief that I don't have him around to bring me "surprise" burgers from BK or whole cakes from the grocery store. :o

10-14-2009, 01:13 AM
I would also have to answer "me" to both.

Hubby is fairly good about being helpful and supportive - if I give him very concrete and specific directions.

10-14-2009, 01:23 AM
That is so adorable, what your son says :D.

my biggest saboteur would have to be my best friend. It's a mixture of her trying to pressure me into eating crap so that she doesn't feel bad about eating it, and just straight up not believing i can do it. But things have started to get a little better.

After posting a thread asking for help about her, i decided to take action. I sat her down and said, "You are always making comments about how much you like or are okay with your body, but i can tell that you're still not happy with your chub. You're always trying to get me and Kevin (my cousin and other BFF) to eat all these terrible foods, and if we refuse you whine and say, 'Well i don't wanna eat any if you guys wont'. I know that this is because you don't wanna give up those foods, but you feel guilty being the only one eating it." I think something kinda clicked after that. She said that maybe it would be best if we don't go out to eat when we hang, but i told her that's not the point: we can still go out to eat, we just need to make better choices.

As for not believing in me, i think that's still an issue. i almost regret telling her what im doing, because she gives me a look of pity every time i bring it up, as if to say "oh honey, you really think you can do this?" and she always says "i can't image you skinny, i just cant"... idk.. maybe im over analyzing..

Holy Moly, that was long, sorry, haha.

My biggest supporters would have to be a mixture of my mom and the wonderful people in my bible study. They always tell me how proud of me they are. My youth leader has a severe fear of gaining weight, so we are both there for each other, i joke in my head about how we should pray for God to take our problems, modify them into good things, and then give it back to the other. as for my mom, she has 180 pounds to lose, and i can tell shes trying so hard to not be a push over this time :).

10-14-2009, 01:37 AM
I'd have to say that my greatest saboteur would be my grandma, who I live with... though at times she can be a great motivator too!

She constantly is praising me for my weight loss, telling me how happy she is about it, etc.... but I cannot whatsoever (I do the shopping in the house, she's kind of getting up in years) bring any of our normal ethnic food into the house (rice, ground beef, potatos, tortillas) or she'll start whipping out Mexican rice, tostadas, beef and potatoes drizzled with tomato sause and grease... all amazing food... but on top of being not that healthy for you... they're my trigger foods! As in, when there's a whole pot of it there.... its going to go down my throat because I can't stop! You know, my comfort food.

I just nip it in the bud by not buying it, but it makes me feel bad sometimes... :/

Also on the list of biggest motivators would be the boyfriend (he is chock full of compliments whenever there's any tiny noticeable change... and sometimes even when there's not!!! :lol:) & my best friend Danielle. She's already skinny, but weight loss and maintenance has been a battle for her and we keep each other going. :) (she's on 3FC too, now! :) )

10-14-2009, 04:15 AM
My biggest saboteur is my friend Chelsea. She is one of my most fun amazing friends, so it's really hard to turn down a night out on the town with her. Even when I decide I'm not going to drink somehow she has this uncanny ability to convince me. She doesn't realize she is sabotaging me though, because she believes I've lost all the weight I need to lose, and she doesn't want me to become an obsessive dieter.

My biggest motivation is myself (with an extra push from my exboyfriend). Spite is an extremely powerful motivator.. However, now I do it for myself, but he is still a great motivation when I'm having a lazy day.

10-14-2009, 07:51 AM
My biggest motivation is myself (with an extra push from my exboyfriend). Spite is an extremely powerful motivator.

Lol! I'm so glad I'm not the only person who occasionally uses spite for motivation! It's so helpful on days when you need a push! I totally use the mental image of that boy's jaw dropping when I don't want to work out.

My dad wins the title for best motivator AND saboteur. He's the cutest and most supportive person in my life... we work out together, he's always offering to pay for new running shoes, etc. Every now and then I'll tell him about something I did that day with my trainer, and he'll be in the gym later that day trying it out himself.

However, he doesn't really have to worry about his diet (he's a rail. I swear, it's like he's on the Michael Phelps diet!). He's really into the moderation philosophy, which is fine, because I am as well, but he also does all the cooking and when it comes to vegetables, he's totally clueless. I don't know anyone that can add so many unnecessary calories to vegetables. He's getting better, but it's an uphill battle!

10-14-2009, 08:01 AM
I would have to say my biggest motivator is probably myself, in terms of the mechanics of it. In terms of making me feel good about myself (which I find is essential in keeping myself motivated) I have a lot to thank one of my closeset friends for. She has this trick of just spreading acceptance and peace in her near vicinity. I think it has to do with all the yoga she does:p

Hmm, I don't think I really have any conscious saboteurs, if you know what I mean, but if I had to pick someone I guess it would be a friend of mine who shares my love of wining and dining. She's a skinny mini herself and never has had to think about limiting herself. Somehow when we're together, entirely too much is consumed. I'm the one who definitely needs to put the brakes on, but refusing a good bottle of wine is often too difficult:cheers::?:

10-14-2009, 11:13 AM
I am just starting my weight loss journey, but for me some big motivators are being able to be active with my boys without getting winded within 2 minutes. I would love to go bike ride or hiking with them. Also, a big motivator is getting into my "skinny jeans" which for me is size 10-12. Going shopping for new clothes is something I am going to keep picturing.

I can get sabotaged just by having junk food in the house. If I know it is there it is so hard to resist. Also. my DH and my oldest son bring me home candy bars or my son brings home chicken wings from his work.

My new motto is "Stay strong!"

10-14-2009, 11:48 AM
I'm another in the "myself" and "myself" category.

My DH has been really supportive-- eating the same foods I eat, and preparing on plan foods when I'm at work and he's the one making dinner.

10-14-2009, 12:55 PM
and she always says "i can't image you skinny, i just cant"... idk.. maybe im over analyzing..

Good grief, no over-analyzing there. That is just a nasty thing to say.

10-14-2009, 01:10 PM
My boyfriend is my biggest motivator. In fact, whenever I try to eat healthier, he is always very open to trying new recipes and what not. Also all you ladies on 3FC are great motivators for me.

My biggest saboteur is probably myself. I have gotten better about it though, but in the past, I would reward myself with food, or SWEAR that if I ate bad today, I would be better tomorrow, etc.

10-14-2009, 01:38 PM
I am a returning newbie. I want to pipe in here for some support. My husband last night told me he wants me to lose weight and that" Life is short and I feel like I am being short-changed" ie: he is misisng out on some great life because I am overweight. I think I look pretty good and felt we had a good relationship but now I am MAD as ****. It feels like an ultimatum to me and this is not the first time he has seaid this kind of thing. It makes me want to go buy 4 chocolate bars! HELP! Does he have a right to say this because it is how he feels or is he a jerk who needs the kick to the curb?!

If he's concerned about your health/weight I think it's valid. Would you rather him say nothing then one day out of the blue divorce you? If he's mad cuz you aren't a trophy wife that's different.

Is he overweight? If he is I'd tell him that BOTH of you need to lose weight and do it together. Unless he's totally fit it's unfair to expect you to do it alone.

What does he feel he's missing out on? Did he elaborate? Maybe he wants to lead a more active lifestyle and wants you to join him? If it's not the first time he's said this then I'd take heed and really work on it. I mean if my husband gained 100 lbs I'd tell him to that he needs to lose weight because I am sure I'd lose my attraction to him- I am surprised at times he's still attracted to me! He still calls me beautiful BUT I know he's also happy with my weight loss so far :)

It sucks, it sounds harsh, but I wouldn't take it as he's a jerk, but as he's your spouse, he loves you and doesn't want to lose his attraction to you or lose you period because of health issues.

Good luck.

10-14-2009, 02:06 PM
Well, I don't really have anyone to encourage me here. I've lost a lot of weight and I have only had 2 people comment, the lady across the street and a casual friend.

Do you create posts to announce your accomplishments and milestones so that we can celebrate with you? Or, are you waiting for everyone to notice your ticker? Because, most of us don't really look at the tickers. And, everyone here is always willing to celebrate the victories with our fellow 3FC'ers.

My greatest motivator is my husband. But, he is also my greatest saboteur. We are either 100% together on this or 100% off-plan. I guess we are somewhat co-dependent.

10-14-2009, 03:13 PM
My greatest motivator is my fiancee. He gets me out for hiking every weekend and pushes me to try more difficult trails. He's started exercising with me and it helps so much.

My biggest saboteur... My fiancee. He looves candy and greay food and going out to fancy restaurants. He likes going out on date nights. Which is okay, because I know what the right choices are. But once we get to a restaurant and I try to make sure I order the right thing he gives me the "it's okay, you've worked so hard!" Or "we have that big hike tomorrow anyway" and I cave. Which is my own choice but he makes it so easy for me to justify it.

He's super supportive though, and he doesn't do it on purpose.
I just need to stay strong!

10-14-2009, 04:45 PM
My biggest motivator...ok, two people. My girlfriend is doing WW with me and thats a huge support system. She doesn't let me cave to cravings and reminds me that we have healthy food at home.
And my Big, who was supposed to be my mentor in sorority life and now is just an amazing friend. She drags my butt to the gym, slides her copy of "Runner's World" under my door all the time and makes low calorie food for me all the time.

My biggest saboteur is going to be my best friend from home, who I haven't even told I'm trying to lose weight (we have a very strange relationship) I love her to bits, but she has derailed me before and is strangely affecting me despite not knowing.

10-16-2009, 01:09 PM
My husband is my biggest motivator and supporter. He's the one who'll make sure the kids are fed and start the bedtime procedure so that I can treadmill at night, he's the one who takes them to swimming lessons so I can go to my Zumba class. He eats very healthily and is WAY fit himself, but he has never made me feel bad about my size; he's just the best. My kids are also very supportive, especially my 10 year old DD. She cheers me on at every corner. :)

My saboteurs (besides yours truly ;) ) are my mum and brother. They are both overweight and slothlike and will order pizza, go out for takeout, etc. That's something I just can't do where I live (in the sticks, no delivery, no take out places. If I want Wendy's, I have to drive 1/2 hour) so it's a "treat" when I go down there. It's a 4 hour drive, so I don't really visit all that often, so it's okay. I also go on major walks while I'm there so I can offset any junk food.

10-16-2009, 02:25 PM
I could say I am both my biggest motivator and biggest saboteur...

As far as motivator, I'm really doing this on my own. Buying my own groceries and cooking my own meals... and no one else can make me exercise. LOL.

As for saboteur, I would have said my mother in the past but she has been a lot better this time around. I guess the hardest people to be around are my sisters. They like to drink and have fun... and want me to be 'their definition' of fun too. So it can be hard to say no all the time.

10-17-2009, 04:04 AM
Biggest Saboteurs: My friends. Let me clarify that it's not intentional though. WE are just a couple of lush-y fat chicks that like to eat. Eat well. If it's not going out to eat (where sadly, I still haven't learned how to control myself), it's impromptu wine and cheese nights, or my friend who is an AMMMMMMMMAZZZZZINNNG cook, coming up with these uber delicious Middle Eastern/Soul Food/Mediterranean meals off the cuff.

Biggest Motivator: My sister. She gives me the death stare whenever I think I'm going to order a cheeseburger or have a shot of anything. She makes me feel like i need ot be on my best behavior around her.

10-17-2009, 05:55 PM
I don't allow saboteurs! I decapitate them as they rare their ugly, lipsticked heads!


Can I add to that...

ugly, "pencil-necked", lipsticked heads!