but I hang my head in shame as I am coming off a mini carb binge!!! What was I thinking???
It all started at lunch - new job you know....an email went around to our team (8 of us today) asking about lunch plans...and let's all go out. Four of us were available....and of we traipsed in the BITTER BITING COLD a few blocks from the office at a THAI RESTAURANT!!!...now I don't normally eat Thai food due to a nut allergy - but I was hoping to find something I could eat.
They had some sort of Thai salad w/shrimp and pork on the menu which sounded good until she mentioned it was pre-dressed in some sort of peanut dressing...ending up getting something else: padpakpoopiedo....or something like that???
Shrimp and veggies in a garlic pepper chili sauce....well let's just say it was PRETTY SPICY HOT - a very meager portion...and most of the plate covered in rice!!! So at first I stayed away from it - but in order to "cool" off my mouth I tried some - it was very good...so I had some more....lots of water too. Portion was actually pretty measly with only about 5 shrimp, some snowpea pods, spinach and asparagus. My mouth was on FIRE!
Figured I was okay - but now I realize I cannot HAVE ANY CARBS as I am a true carb addict and even a bit affects me (newbies take heed!)....all afternoon I was tired, sluggish, brain dead, wanting to sleep at my desk...and CRAVING SWEETS...had some pepperoni and sf jello to tide me over.
Got home and went nuts on (of all things) those mini blueberry muffins. Had some left on counter and decided to freeze them for ds's lunches next week - one flew into my mouth...then a couple more...then I was devastated!! What had I done! I am now even more bloated...didn't eat a proper supper (dh called to say he was working late so I basically gave up and just fed the kids).
I am so fearful of the damage done...after all my hard work this week I feel like a failure now! ..and I could just cry!
I am trying hard not to cave in completely and continue on the carb binge altho that is what I want to do....have left kitchen/food area and plan to stay upstairs til bedtime....I really need to get focused for the morning and get back on plan....is it stress? stupidity? or weakness? I'm not really sure.
So that's my sad story - besides that my job is too hard I think...when I imagine the stuff I have to do...I feel very overwhelmed.....not sure I even know what I"m supposed to do...feeling lost and confused.
But it's friday - 2 days off to at least do some laundry and try to get some order in here...nothing major planned this weekend....but dinner out Monday night for best friend's birthday - at an Indian restaurant no less....any suggestions?
Hi to all the newcomers: Shimma and Sha - sounds like you are on track and doing great...hang in there!
Star - where is everyone? I too miss Jamie and fulfig, supersized and karen, Lisa and Jina...is Kim around? I think she was the other day.
Too bad Mr. Mucus did not hand in his walking papers along with your other "friend"......
Jane - talk about the same 2 lbs...I think I have been hovering at this weight since Hallowe'en.....but mostly due to my own transgressions....I am finding it hard to stay on track and getting depressed about it...at the very least I should try to maintain and not go crazy and gain the 38 lbs back! It is nice to wear smaller size clothes!
A SPECIAL CONGRATULATIONS TO ANGEL-EYES - way to go! 25 lbs off is an amazing feat....you must look and feel gorgeous!
Keep up the good work!
Have to go get kiddies to bed....maybe turn in early as well!
Nitey nite!
Froufy