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#171 - Time To Get Tough

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Old 10-09-2002, 10:58 AM   #1
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Default #171 - Time To Get Tough

Friends, it's been a long time since I've started a # thread but I really felt the need to bring attention to this issue and starting a new thread seemed like the best way.

I posted on the 'where's BA thread' and some of it was along the idea of how busy we all get and so on and so forth. So after I logged off the computer I go downstairs and I'm on my exercise bike and it occurs to me what a big pile of steaming you know what that excuse is. I am doing the typical woman thing in that I am putting everyone's needs before my own. Next thing you know I'll be 80 years old and still weighing what I weigh now.

Now I know that my baby, my husband, my work are important things. But are they more important than my own health and peace of mind? Can I be a good mom, wife, nurse if I feel like cr@p all the time because of my weight?

I've been waffling around this for ages. I lose a bit and then gain it back. I'm not really putting a lot of oomph into my efforts into losing weight. I play at being serious, I have my journal out and buy exercise tapes but until I am using that journal all the time and actually using the tapes I'm just pretending at being serious. Even coming to this site and being supportive and doing challenges and so on is really just all talk and no action.

Okay I'm kind of getting lost in all of this. I think I'm trying to say that it is time to 'sh!t or get off the pot' as my mother's favourite saying goes. We are getting to that dangerous time of year...Halloween, Thanksgiving, Xmas and you know that we all gain weight during the winter with all these occassions that of course demand food.

Look, there are a few here that are losing weight but I think a lot of us are just waffling around. We need some serious kicks in the @ss to get us going. Maybe I am just speaking for myself here, this is how I feel about my efforts to lose weight. I'm making a ton of excuses why I can't get serious, the baby, my job, my husband.

Dyan, kudos to you for getting up at 4am to workout. That is a serious committment. this is what we need to be doing.

I ran into a girl at work who in the year I've been off on maternity has lost about 80 lbs. she just cut back on eating and started walking. Nothing difficult, nothing fancy just a serious committment to losing weight. She looks unbelievably great. It can be done, it can be done without bells and whistles. Let's just get down to it and do it!
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Old 10-09-2002, 11:48 AM   #2
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I am with you 100%. I too have been waffling, all talk and no action. On Monday I started, and have been doing just what that girl did. Sensable eating. But I also am looking for a kick in the butt if I don't keep it together. We need to be supportive, but a little tough love might be in order too.

I'm with ya Jen - 100%
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Old 10-09-2002, 12:33 PM   #3
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Jen and Sandi,

I agree wholeheartedly. I've been waffling so long, it messes with my confidence to finally DO IT. "Yeah, right" the voice in my head says when I determine that THIS TIME I'm gonna do it.

I appreciate the tough love you have for yourself. I'm sort of on a roll as this this forum is a NEW thing for me. However, I'm trying to prepare myself to fend off the excuses when they come.

Someone said to me one time, "Overeating is a problem that tells you that you don't have a problem." That's what I try to remember when the lies start talking to me.

I've even caught myself hiding eating from my husband like I used to do when I was a kid with my parents. I want to confess that crazy behavior right now! What that tells me is that I've made it about pleasing my husband, not about taking care of myself. I can't hide the sneaky eating from my HIPS or from my HEART!

So much of this process and journey requires shining a light on the lies and the excuses. We shouldn't be mean to ourselves, but we have to be honest.

So, I'm up for a kick in the butt when I need it. You have my permission!

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Old 10-09-2002, 01:25 PM   #4
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Jen,

First let me say ~ THANK YOU!!! You said what I've been feeling for quite sometime. I could never have said it as nice as you did. You should see my journal! I marked it private, because I know tons of people would have been very upset. I was in a mood and I was fustrated. I had heard way too many excuses for one day. I thought "that is the lamest excuse". I should know, I excuse'd myself to 312 pounds!! NO MORE EXCUSES. I thought, what? eating right (whatever that may be for some), drinking your water and trying to get in exercise, shouldn't be that hard. Of course there are times, when we aren't 100%, maybe not even 65%, but at least TRY. Getting up at 4 am is definitely no picnic, but it appears that that's what I gotta do, if I am going to lose this weight. Trust me, there have been times when I wanted to reach into this computer and shake the person that posted , but I don't. I try to be supportive, because I know that some people are more sensitive than others. But see, now that people have given me permission to kick them in the tail when they need it, look out !! I may have to change my "senior member" status to "Tail kicker" . My mother is a good example. If I have to hear about how she needs to lose weight one more time, I just may kick her ~ literally. I've been hearing this for years. I've offered to walk w/ her (as she only lives upstairs from me), I've offered to give her exercise videos, I've offered, and offered and offered. But yet she does NOTHING, it's one excuse after another. I just want to tell her to shut up about it, until she REALLY wants to do it and then I'd be more than willing to be there for/with her. Alas, there is nothing I can do, but move forward with my own efforts. If that's being selfish, then so be it. I strongly believe that our weight loss efforts should be THE number one priority. When we're happy, then those around us can only be happier.
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Old 10-09-2002, 01:46 PM   #5
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I'm glad that people are taking this in the way that I intended it. I don't want to offend anyone but I think we all need a huge reality check here. For a lot of us what we are doing just isn't working even though we think that we are doing what we can to lose weight. The plain and simple fact is that we probably aren't. If you do think that you are putting in 100% of yourself then this isn't applying to you. When I saw that Dyan was getting up at 4 am to exercise and I posted on the other thread 'oh I could never do that' combined with some other stuff that I've been reading and thinking about I realized that I've been really lame about all this and then wondering why I am gaining weight. Well I think I can figure it out really easy.

So I went out to lunch with my friend and despite what I posted in #170 I pigged out big time. Can you go to a Chinese buffet and not pig out?? Big mistake picking that place on today of all days. When I got there I decided that I would let myself go and eat what I wanted and that was sort of a 'last supper' for me. I'm so full right now I'll probably have carrot sticks for dinner and still make my points. Talking about pigging out what does everything define pigging out as? Let me tell you what I had and you can tell me if it was pigging out or not. A bowl of hot and spicy soup with 2 breadsticks, 2 plates of food consisting of: 3 meatballs, 2 chicken balls (I didn't eat the breading, it was quite yucky), 8 garlic spareribs, about a cup and 1/2 of fried rice, 3 mussles, 1/2 cup breaded mini shrimp, 4 pieces of lemon chicken strips, 1/4 cup really fine noodles, brocolli, 2 very tiny squares and a small dish of chocolate ice cream with syrup and m&m's. that to me is definately pigging out, your definition might be different. we saw a guy walk by with his plate heaped up about 4 inches but then my friend could see him eating and said he ate like a pig too. so that was my last pig out, I'm walking the straight and narrow from now on. Can any of you WW'ers give a guess as to how many points that would be? I'm thinking about 20 points or so.

I realize the huge contradiction here. In the first bit I am talking about making excuses and then I got out and eat a huge lunch. that was definately a last hurrah. I knew when I was eating it that was going to be it for feeling like a beached whale after a meal. It was actually a good thing because I really wanted to have lunch with my friend, we had a good time talking, I ate as I pleased and drank tons of water. If the guy hadn't kept filling the glasses every 5 seconds I would have a better count of how much I drank. I'm going to count it as 32 oz though I think it was probably more than that.

Okay so I've probably written enough today, time to get my rear in gear. I bought a 'yoga for dummies' tape that I've heard is a good workout so I want to try it out.

Take care all.
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Old 10-09-2002, 01:59 PM   #6
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Jen~ Just read your comments from #170, and let me tell ya...it ain't easy..... I'm usually up until DH gets home. We spend some time talking about our day, what the kids did, what we need to do the next day, etc.... So it's usually around 11:30pm that I get to go to sleep and trust me! as SOON as my head hits that pillow, I am OUT. There are days that I feel so bad for DH (he wants to do what? when?? ). Sorry babe, sleep is way more important at the moment. Luckily he's VERY understanding.

People are always asking me how I do it. Take care of 3 kids, age 3 and under....I tell them by the grace god, a good husband and ear plugs!! Kaleigha the 7 month old, was a total surprise! I took clomid to conceive the first 2. So imagine my surprise, when Lucas was 4 months old, to find out I was 5-6 weeks pregnant. . At first I just shook my head , then I started to cry "a little". Then I called DH into the room to show him the test. While he was doing that I was checking out the box/ the wrapper, anything....because I just KNEW it had to be BROKEN. AHA!! The test had expired , whew . DH dashed out the door to buy another test. He came back, I did what I had to...and 2 VERY dark lines (as the first one showed to faint lines)showed up immediately, then I completely lost it! I was laughing so hard, I nearly peed myself . DH was looking at me like I crazy. Between giggles, I was like, it's either laugh or cry! Okay...how I got on this subject, I don't know. I do have a tendency to ramble.....Needless to say, I wouldn't change a thing!
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Old 10-09-2002, 02:26 PM   #7
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After having one myself I truly believe that a baby is a blessing. I wish I had started having babies a long time ago. I just thank goodness that I did have one, I would have missed out on so much. I'm not saying that everyone is cut out to be parents or that your life is incomplete if you don't have a child but they really do add something special to you life.
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Old 10-09-2002, 02:35 PM   #8
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Quote:
Originally posted by Jen
Talking about pigging out what does everything define pigging out as? Let me tell you what I had and you can tell me if it was pigging out or not. A bowl of hot and spicy soup with 2 breadsticks, 2 plates of food consisting of: 3 meatballs, 2 chicken balls (I didn't eat the breading, it was quite yucky), 8 garlic spareribs, about a cup and 1/2 of fried rice, 3 mussles, 1/2 cup breaded mini shrimp, 4 pieces of lemon chicken strips, 1/4 cup really fine noodles, brocolli, 2 very tiny squares and a small dish of chocolate ice cream with syrup and m&m's.
Wow. When I go to the Chinese Buffet, I try & have 2 bowls of hot & sour soup & an eggroll. Maybe 2 eggrolls. It's VERY hard to do. Especially when they have crab rangoons.

BTW, what are 2 very tiny squares????
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Old 10-09-2002, 03:40 PM   #9
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Quote:
Originally posted by SuchAPrettyFace
BTW, what are 2 very tiny squares????
Like dessert squares, they were about 1" square. So I guess you are saying that was a definate pig out?

Just finished the yoga tape. I'll tell you that it isn't a practice that will cause you to sweat like crazy but my muscles are feeling it. It is hard work to keep good posture and stay in the poses. I liked it.
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Old 10-09-2002, 04:33 PM   #10
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Waffling is my MIDDLE name!!!

I am seriously serious. I have had 2 complete OP days in a row with EXERCISE. Yes, I said exercise. It may be too early to say, but I really think I have my motivation and determination. I am angry..and am going to use that emotion to my benefit.

I am with you.
I can hear you.

And am going there too!

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Old 10-10-2002, 10:07 AM   #11
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WAY TO GO JENNIFFER!!!

I am so glad to hear that more and more of us are really starting to get serious about our weight loss efforts. We knew coming in that it wasn't going to be easy, that it was going to be a grand journey with low valleys and high peaks. The motivation comes and goes, and hopfully comes back. For every we excuse we make, we are really only hurting ourselves. Why do we hurt ourselves? Don't really know. Especially now w/ the holidays approaching, we need to buckle down and do whatever it may take, go get where we want to be.

I want to be 75 pounds lighter by the end of the year. Need to lose 27.5 more pounds to get there, That's a little over 2 pounds a week. And ya know what..... it's a secret.......come closer.... I AM GOING TO DO IT!!! I have the drive and determination to get where I want to be. Come **** or high water, mark my words.....I WILL DO IT. (It's now in black & white, so there's no turing back).
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Old 10-10-2002, 10:26 AM   #12
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W O W - I want your attitude Dyan! You can only win with thinking like that

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Old 10-10-2002, 10:47 AM   #13
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GOD I NEEDED THIS POST!!! thankyou thankyou thankyou. I've been having a great pity party here and to all who suffered through my earlier post, thanks. I recently cleaned out the bookshelves and found what I believe to be every book ever written on the subject of weight loss. If reading about weight loss was aerobic exercise, I'd be thin as a rail. The bottom line for me is that I want to have my cake and eat it, too. Losing weight DOES require some sacrifice. Sure on WW you can have cheesecake...but you pay for it elsewhere. That's the reality that I don't want to accept. Ah well..thanks again for the kick in the rear--it got me moving in the right direction!!

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Old 10-10-2002, 11:00 AM   #14
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Ok Dyan...you've inspired me. My walking has been terrible, never any time. I've always said "what do you want me to do get up at 4:30 am and do it?!?!?!" Ok, if you can, I can too. Here it is in black and white.

Starting Monday I will get up @ 4:30 and walk. OMG!! There it is in black and white!!
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Old 10-10-2002, 11:52 AM   #15
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YAY SANDI!!! You can do it girl!! Like I said, the trick is NOT to think about it. Just get dressed in whatever your gonna work out in, put the video on or walk out the door (which you are doing). I always rewind the tape when I'm done, so I just have to turn it on. Then while it's going through the whole FBI: WARNING, I get my water and whatever I can do or get done before it stats. The first 5 minutes, I'm still half asleep, but man, by the time I'm done, I feel awesome. Knowing that I'm doing what it takes, to reach my goal.

I'm rooting for all of us! Dana and Barb, ya know what it takes, so let's do this together, that's why we're here right? oooohhhh Dana, it's tough love time.....I noticed that you haven't been going to your weigh-ins, because your afraid to see a gain. It's time to be accountable for our actions. TOM is right around the corner, and I totally hate to weigh in when it's TOM, but I do it anyway....why? because I have to be accountable. Although last month I still saw a loss, right smack in the middle.

Okay....now see what cha'll did? Ya went and opened a can of worms, or should I say "whup ***". Ya'll had to go and give me permission to keep tail.

I hope everyone has one of the best day's ever! Sandi I'll be looking for your post regarding your early morning work outs!

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