Thanks, again... You've all been just amazing and sharing my horrible experience here has gone a long way towards helping me put the whole nasty mess behind me. I've gotten a laugh or two today reading your responses and it's really helped me get my perspective back. I know that, in the long run, these kinds of experiences will only serve to fuel me in my quest. I really appreciate all of the kind words you've all had to say. I desperately needed the hugs, so thank you!
You are definately not alone... aside from being the biggest in my friend's wedding last year, I was the biggest in my brother's wedding 2 years ago too. My dress looked terrible and I felt so self-conscious. Then, to make it worse my sister-in-law had me walk down the aisle with the skinniest guy you've ever seen. It hadn't really crossed my mind until one of my sisters laughed after the rehearsal walk-through that I was going to look ridiculous because the fat chick was paired with the skinny guy. Ugh, talk about dreading the wedding the next day...
I'm sorry to hear it aerotiger girl I was a bridesmaid a year ago, and I can't say I'd do it again It made me feel compromised, though not in term sof the dresses.
Where we were shopping, the average size was actually 12. The thinnest bridesmaid was an 8, and another maid Bride were larger. Trying it on was awkward for everyone, but we basicaly just agreed on a dress type that we thought would look flattering on everyone, on multiple body types, and it worked out (HATED the colour, though!)
Next time, I'm sure you can add your commentaries without trying it on She'll really appreciate the effort ou're putting in.
I wrote a huge post last year about a mini-breakdown I had over a bridesmaid dress...all the other girls were tiny, and yes, I'm at goal, but I was still in the biggest size, and had trouble getting in the dresses, because I have WIDE shoulders and all of the dresses were fitted right in the chest/rib/shoulder area, so I'd have these barely-zipped, tight-enough-I-spilled-out dresses on that then proceeded to TENT around the rest of me. It felt awful. I'm sorry you went through that.
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I want to know where the store workers were? It seems to me it ought to be their job to intercede in situations like these. Brides and their mothers can't be held responsible for anything they do. They're not thinking about anything but themselves, and that's normal. But someone should have been rational enough to see what it was doing to you and that should have been the workers.
This was not my experience at all, either. The salegirl treated me like I was a fat cow and made my size unmentionable. You'd think they'd step in, but no. Ugh.
Anyway, I'm really sorry you had this experience, but you got through it, and you're on your way to being a healthier you in any case.
I'm so sorry you had to go through that. I can't imagine how mortifying it had to have been, but I have to say you handled it REALLY well and for that you should be proud of yourself. You are a class act.
I have been the skinny girl and now I'm the fat girl and I just think we all need to remember that immature and spiteful reactions towards those who do not struggle with their weight are no more righteous than immature and spiteful actions from them taken towards people who do. We're all women and no matter our size we often suffer from our own brands of self-loathing. Rubbing a "skinny girl's" socially conceived inadequacies in her face is no different than if she pointed out the fat on your backside, or around your waist. Do unto others...
just wanted to commiserate- brides maids dresses are evil as it is. last one i wore my boobs were falling out of it- and since i'm 5 foor 2 boy was a popular with the boys that night. lol. i didn't even notice i was giving a full rack view until well into the night.
and then there's the bridal shopping i did. once place specially pulled me aside and told me that 1. there was absolutely nothing they have that fits me and 2. if i'm going to handle their merch i need to wear gloves. which no one else had to do. i guess they were worried about the snickers bar they imagined i keep in my pocket at all times.
i have also once had a major melt down in the middle of the mall trying to find a dress. not pretty. lol.
I'm so sorry you had to go through that. I can't imagine how mortifying it had to have been, but I have to say you handled it REALLY well and for that you should be proud of yourself. You are a class act.
I have been the skinny girl and now I'm the fat girl and I just think we all need to remember that immature and spiteful reactions towards those who do not struggle with their weight are no more righteous than immature and spiteful actions from them taken towards people who do. We're all women and no matter our size we often suffer from our own brands of self-loathing. Rubbing a "skinny girl's" socially conceived inadequacies in her face is no different than if she pointed out the fat on your backside, or around your waist. Do unto others...
thankyou Evoo, I wasn't going to comment on how awful some of the comments on this thread were making me feel I have a great compassion for others and even though my weight isn't as high as some on this site, I would never make anyone feel humiliated like the OP felt.
Back to the original post, I am sending hugs for the pain you were put through
Wedding dress shopping was one of the worst experiences of my life and I am a street size 10! I imagined a day of "say yes to the dress" but instead found no dresses that fit me , I had to practically rip them to get them over my hips and then they looked ill fitted on. They actually convinced me to put a deposit down on a dress that looked completely awful! I had to convince them to let me use the deposit on other items from the store after I found a better fitting dress that made me feel at least a little pretty.
I continue to hate shopping period...at any size.
Additional bridesmaid evilness- I was in a wedding once where a bridesmaid pulled me aside before I went down the aisle and told me to make sure to hold my bouquet over my stomach so people couldn't see it.
I've gotten a laugh or two today reading your responses and it's really helped me get my perspective back. I know that, in the long run, these kinds of experiences will only serve to fuel me in my quest. I really appreciate all of the kind words you've all had to say. I desperately needed the hugs, so thank you!
I was a bridesmaid a year ago, and I can't say I'd do it again 
