My childhood was very similar with the exception of wiring my mouth shut. However, if they would have approached at the right time in high school after years of my weight being a focus in my relationship with my mother, I am sure I would have jumped at the chance.
This time I have tackled the problem using a full blitz against the problem. *long history* I have some endocrine problem that the doctors can not really figure out. I've been dx'd with PCOS based on symptoms but all "possible" tests come out negative for that. They ran about every endocrine lab test I think that is out there and they have no clue as to why I don't have a period, I do have facial hair, and I struggle with losing weight. About 8 yrs ago, I a natural path took a look at my lab work and symptoms and concluded that my thyroid was working at a subclinical level. Taking thyroid did not help my weight issues, actually I still gained. However, I was no longer cold 90% of the time and now when I do get cold, I am usually able to warm myself back up. I still do not have periods. 2 yrs ago I started taking welbutrin for my obsessive relationship with food. Again, no instant weight loss, but I obsess much less about food and I seem more able to stop when I actually am full. I also noticed the return of periods when I was at my highest dosage. I had too many other side affects, so I dropped the dosage. However, this got me thinking about how much stress really affects my weight issues. So I started to let go of some of my emotions around my weight. **history over**
My method has been:
Medication - thyroid, welbutrin.
Body Bugg - tells me how active I have been and gives me a rough understanding (supposedly to 90% accurate) of how much calories I have burned throughout my day. It showed that I really didn't burn as much as a 300lbs person should be burning, based on the mathematical formulas.
Exercise - gym membership and recently added personal trainer
Menu - I am a very picky eater so I purchased a food saver and I make my own "frozen dinners". I cook all my dinner meals for a month in 1 weekend and freeze 4 servings of each meal. I do 5 different meals so I have dinner for the week, for a month all planned and set. My partner doesn't do so well with this plan, so she is using the new health choice and eat right frozen meals to help with her portion control. At first, I really went from working on dropping my calories to working on dropping my portion sizes and eating more often. I now eat every 2-3 hours from the time I am up until about 6-7pm. Once I was eating as often as I should, eating the right quantities, and not feeling deprived I tackled getting the calories in line. I am about to tackle nutritional balanceness of my diet.
Another thing that has helped me emotionally/mentally for this battle has been the recent findings that food manufactures have found the right combination of salt, sugar, and fat to cause us to be addicted to their foods - a chemical, physical addition. I am a drive through queen. This knowledge has helped me completely cut out the drive through. I have no problem admitting to a food related issue, but knowing that this is possibly true has allowed me to forgive myself to some degree and not feel so deprived about removing it from my life. Feeling deprived or that life is unfair around food has been a sabotaging force in the past.
*whewww* Long answer to say, welcome, we understand, and you are not alone. Taking it slow is fine, finding what works for you is what matters, and we are here to help you as needed.
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My suggestion is to start eating breakfast. It's an essential habit for someone who tends to skip meals and binge at night. With all you've been through, maybe you should take it slow, and breakfast is a great starting point. It's really important, it will get you started off on the right foot mentally and physically. Even if you don't feel like eating, eat something. You CAN do this!!! Check in often and let us know how you're doing.
