WELCOME TO WEEK 12!!

Frankly I feel little excitment for week 12, I just can't wait for it to be done and I can feel like I can start anew. Not surprisingly I am going into week 12 at the same weight I started week 1.

I have alot of stuff to get done in my house, the closet is finished (sort of, no doors but hey I can hang the clothes) and a set of three cabinets have been hung. This will allow me to clean up several prblem areas that always get me down. So this week I am focusing on getting my house on track, getting the kids back into a routine and then if I have time and energy I will focus on my weight.

I need to find a groove with cleaning and such that I can get it done with the kids around and still be able to focus on them. I can't trust the little boy I watch b/c he hits and bites...ALOT. But I also want to carve out time fo rme to sit down ie)nap time. So that's my focus this week. I am sure I can do it. Now that I won't be at my mom's on Fridays I am sure I will be able to get big projects done that day.

Well have a great week everyone. THANKS FOR ALL YOUR SUPPORT
~misty

Misty, I feel about the same about this bootcamp. It is a great idea and probably would work really well if we could stick to it. I think we both need better supports at home before we are ready to tackle something like this. Well I hope that we will all continue to post regardless of whether we are doing a bootcamp or whatever.

Tracy, I can totally identify with what you were saying about your husband having a heartattack. There have been plenty of times where I almost wished my husband would be in a fatal car accident on the way home from work. We've been having a lot of problems at home, mostly because of his mood swings, rage, etc, see the posts in week 11 from me about what has been going on. Sometimes I think it would be so much easier if he weren't around and how would I feel about it truly if something like that happened. Difficult questions to answer.

Well I've welcomed this chance to get to know others on this board, especially Misty who's been a wonder in keeping up with starting the new threads and we appreciate you Misty even if you don't get the same thanks at home.

Thanks Jen!

Is the thread updating on your end? I went in to see if anyone responded to the new thread yet, kids are sleeping and I am taking a break since I started in cleaning the house at 6 am. But for the last severeal days none of the new posts register on the Dr. Phil page, you know what I mean? Like it has said the last post to the Week 11 was From Jen Today at 10:37 or something like that for DAYS now. And this new thread wasn't even there, I had to find it on the new posts page. Weird.

I am very sad to hear that you guys are so unhappy that if your husbands weren't around it'd be ok. I totally know what you mean and know how you can feel that way, it makes me sad to think of you being so unhappy though. I'm scared that if something did happen to my husband I would lose everything b/c of the whole job thing. But I know in someways it would be so much easier not to deal with him. Not that I'd want something to happen to him, or that I am at a point where I would consider divorce, but somedays it'd just be easier to be on my own. He used to travel alot for work and I resented that he was gone all the time, but in alot of ways it was nice, I saw him a couple times a month and other than that I pretty much did as I pleased. This was before kids though.

So now I am going to focus on me and be totally selfish and just maybe pretend he's not here and do what I want. Maybe I make myself too dependent on him. There is a course I'd like to buy and I think I am going to set aside a certain amount each week and buy teh course. I can certainly get a job with the skills in it. I won't go back to work until my kids are in school, but I will at least feel like I have a brain left LOL.

I think after this week is over we should start a new challenge. One with less restrictions. Maybe a one week challenge and then a two week challenge, or maybe even a one day challenge. Something to keep the ball rolling. I like starting threads b/c it makes me accountable. Whether I succeed or not, I am forced to come here and own my actions.

Well back to work for me Might as well take advantage of sleeping kids. Have a good day!!!
~misty

Hey there Misty. Yeah, everything seems to be updating properly here. I did post last night on the week 11 thread and I'm pretty sure it is there when I looked this morning.

No I guess its not that I truly wish my husband were dead, like you said it would be so much easier if he weren't around sometimes. I don't have the worries about a job that you do and in fact financially I would probably be better off because it is mostly his fault for the black hole of debt that we are in. I don't say that it is completely his fault because maybe I should have put my foot down and stopped what he was doing. It was just in the past few weeks that I realized that he spends money to try and make himself feel better. So in some ways there is really not much I could do, it would have just aggravated him worse.

I think it sounds great that you are looking into saving up for this course and working on the house. Just pick one room, like the one with the wall paper coming down, heck even if you pick one wall to do at a time, just get the wallpaper completely off and clean off all the mildew. Apparently a solution of liquid laundry fabric softener and water works really well to get the wallpaper off. Don't ask me how much water and how much softener, maybe there is something on the internet about it, I"m sure there is because I have seen it on decorating shows before. Your kids actually might have fun helping with this, it makes a terrific mess though and what kid doesn't like getting dirty! For the mildew you have to wash the walls with a strong bleach/water solution, if you have any of those cheap masks you should probably wear one of those because the mildew spores can get in your lungs. You probably have to rinse the walls really well too to get all the bleach off because I'm not sure if it makes a difference if there is bleach on the walls when you try to paint or wallpaper. Just go and start doing it, don't wait for him to help you or propose doing it otherwise it sounds like you'll be waiting forever. You can even do stuff with the electrical. I've put up new ceillng lights, light sockets and switches. All you have to do is make sure that the power is off in the house, I usually go and throw the main switch to make completely sure. I'll bet there is all kinds of stuff on the internet you can find about wiring.

I think starting up a new challenge next week sounds like a good idea, maybe we can choose something small we could try to achieve ie increasing water intake every week. Right now while my husband is the way he is I can't even concentrate or worry about losing weight. He's thrown it up in my face a couple of times in the last week or so that I've been going the gym for months and I have all these workout videos and I haven't lost any weight. So of course that makes me feel really great about myself.

Anyways hope you have a better day! I'm planning on sleeping for a few hours and then maybe I"ll get to the gym for a short workout. Take care.

There it finally seems to be updating on this end.

I think I will take your advice Jen and start working on stuff. I'm not sure if I can removed the mildew from this room though as it is on the plaster which could be up to 100 years old. But I can at least get the wallpaper off and such. I also plan to paint all the down stairs wood work this summer.

Well got to go, todya has been so so on teh eatingf ront.

~misty

Good for you Misty!! that's a great start and you'll feel tons better once you get working away at it. There's nothing like a project like that to lift your spirits. We are planning on selling the house in the fall and I have tons of stuff to do over the summer and I really need to get working away at it. I'm planning on working from the basement up but right now there is so much stuff in the basement it isn't funny. We are having a yard sale on the 14th and that will clear out tons of stuff because I've been putting stuff away just for the yard sale for months now. Then I can really get to work down there and get cleaning. I had a nice surprise last night, one of the nurses I work with is the cousin of the real estate agent who helped us buy this house and we were going to get to help sell it and buy another place. We had a real nice chat about home renos etc.

I can't see why you can't get the mildew off the plaster, you can wipe the plaster but you'll just have to use a weaker bleach solution and just use a damp cloth instead of soaking it like you could do it if were mildew on top of a coat of paint. I don't know, maybe you could find something on the internet about getting mildew off plaster. I'm sure someone has tackled the job before and succeeded.

Hi everybody!

My house has awful wallpaper issues, but not like yours, Misty! There's gotta be some way to tackle it. Maybe if you get started, your DH will be inspired to help.

My day has been pretty good - had a thing with DH this morning about money, but that's a monthly occurrence. Worked out, took DD to gymnastics, and looked at a car for sale - a Honda Element. I finally convinced DH that my car, a '95 Mazda Protege with 163k miles on it, was not going to last or be safe for us for long. The Element is owned by a family at our church, and they want just the person-to-person blue book price for it, so I'm thinking we'll do it. DH has 3 more payments to make on his car, but we can do it.

Hey Jen - your comment about exercise videos intrigued me - what kinds/instructors do you have? I like them, too. Whenever DH gives me any crap about how many I own, I remind him how many vacuum tubes he has in his closets.

I'll check ya'll tomorrow. DD wants to type in a smilie:

Hello all!

I am feeling so much less grumpy and ready to get back on track. I was talking to my husband about that course I wanted to take and he was like "just go buy it already". I guess sometimes I create the dependence and he'd really rather me make some decisions. Now let's just see if he gets annoyed with the one I make. It's a course to be a Microsoft Certified Systems Engineer. Something I am interested in, but know very little about so I hope it's not over my head at first.

I hear you on the money thing Tracy and the car thing. I got so fed up with doing what my husband told me to do with the money then getting yelled at for it. I just handed it all over...big mistake b/c I never know where stuff is and how much we have. We have a Tracker, which I really do love. But my son's rear facing carseat DOES NOT FIT and you have to drive with your legs hitting the dash. He turns one in August and we can turn him around then and that should help, but it's really so small that we can't go anywhere for very long b/c there just isn't enough room.

I think Honda Elements are cute. I know a guy who bought one liked it so well he went and bought a second one for his wife. I hope it all works out for you.

I have decided since I have gained back so much weight I am going to take my 10% charm and my 25 pound star off my charm necklace until I earn them back. I am waffling back and forth between totally going back to my points or just trying to eat well. I feel very restricted with the points and it seems then my whole life is counting, but I honestly do better when I do follow the poins b/c I have a set limit. I am going to start keeping an emotions/feelings or whatever journal on my computer and I am going to go back to writing stuff down. I am also going to give myself a BIG reward for reaching 180 or 174, not sure which. 180 is 25 pounds from this point and 174 is 50 pounds from my starting point. That reward is a weekend all to myself, no husband, no kids, in a hotel. I can sleep, and read, and go shopping (not that I'll have any money LOL).

Jen I hope everything works out with your house. My neighbor is gearing up to sell hers and I can see what must go into it. But it must be exciting and kind of fun at the same time...getting a new place not all the work lol.

Well I'm off to face the day. have a good one all!!!
~misty

Morning all. I weighed in this morning and I'm at my usual 227, so at least I've lost the couple of lbs I have gained over the past couple of weeks. I'd be so happy even just to get under 225 and stay there!!! I've made a decision about the gym. Before I think I was not motivated to go because I felt guilty if I couldn't get in a cardio routine and weight training. I don't feel like doing the weight routines lately and so I haven't been going. Well now I'm going to be satisfied if I get there and do a 30 minute cardio, I prefer the elliptical machine. I'm planning on increasing the amount of time each week by a couple of minutes.

I started cleaning up the basement yesterday and I need to keep working away on that.

Good luck with the course Misty. Just don't try and do to many courses at once. I did that this semester and signed up for 2 courses. I was going to drop one but then I found out that the final mark is based on 3 open book exams I can do at home so I think I can manage that. The other course is a bit more involved with a self assessment quiz every week, an essay and a final exam in June. It helps that I work nights and I have a couple of hours every night to do homework.

Tracy, I actually don't have that many videos so I don't know what my husband is beaking off about. I have a couple of buns of steel videos (ancient I know and I can't remember the instructors name, it is Tracy I think, can't remember her last name but she did a lot of the buns of steel videos), also have one of the kickboxing tapes, Yoga for Dummies and Pilates for Dummies. I have one other one, can't remember what it is off the top of my head, some kind of super aerobic one that I could never keep up with anyway.

Well have a good day everyone, see you later!

Hi!

Jen-I think your gym plan is a good one. Getting there and doing anything is better than skipping, and if you feel up to it you can add weights anytime you want. I bet it feels good to bet some of the basement done. I hope your yard sale goes well. I had 6 computer monitor boxes full of clothes, I considered a yard sale, but I am just too lazy so my brother in law took them to the good will for me. They are all my "fat" clothes so that scale better keep going DOWN.

Well I'm off, I slacked on my cleaning this morning so I have to go do it now and DS needs some lunch.
~misty

Hi women. I'm feeling a little less *****y today - TOM has hit, easing some tension. Scale's the same, but at least it's not up.

I think we'll get the car. DH is still being wishy-washy and whining about money, but I surprised him about checking on a loan and getting insurance figures, etc. He he. I'm preapproved at their lowest rate, they just need the VIN number to cut a check. He he.

Matthew's napping, so I need to clean before he wakes so we can get to the park as promised. Ya'll have good days. Good luck with the course, Misty!

Okay, I'd like a do-over for yesterday. I made the mistake of not packing a snack to take to the park, and dipped into the kids' because I was starving. I think I ate 500 calories in cookies. DOWT!! TOM isn't helping - my energy is sapped, but today will be better. I'm going to my mom's and she's on Core, so that's good.

Jen, I did a little reading up on what's been going on with you for the past few weeks - is DH on meds now and doing better? I can understand how it is being with someone so negative. My DH was once on anti-depressants as well, and now he's off. He's just a naturally pessimistic person and has to complain constantly about something. Years ago, I was the highlight of his life - now I'm just one of several things contributing to his misery. It's making me miserable a lot of the time as well.

Check ya'll later -

Tracy, dh started a new antidepressant this week. Sunday night he had a big blow up over nothing and I managed to convince him to try something the dr suggested. he'd been on about 3 different ones over the past 3 months or so and nothing seemed to be working, things were actually worse in some ways. The one he's on now has made him really tired but I"m hoping he'll get past that and be in a better mood. He's been okay since Monday so my fingers are crossed that it will last.

I'm majorly tired, worked nights last night so I"m going to hit the sack for some much needed sleep.

Take care all.

hello!

I totally blew yesterday and Monday. I added up a guess of my points, I am negative 72, and that's AFTER I took off for my 35 flex points. The kids were super bad yesterday, the ones I watch not mine, and I just totally ate my way through the afternoon just to keep from screaming at them. It's hard to scream with cookie in your mouth. I am at a loss as to how to disipline them. The boy especially, he's two and he hits, bites, chokes my cats, hit my dog in his broken leg on purpose. At home he killed some baby ducks they bought.

Time out is way over his head and his mom just yells or spanks. I actually broke down and spanked him today, his mom told me to, b/c he was playing along and just got up and bit my baby son in the face. Luckily I was right there and stopped him before he did any damage again. But I totally lost it and gave his butt a smack. He smashes food everywhere, rarely uses silverware, rips up books, I can't have anything within his grasp at the table or he will destroy it. He waits until I turn around or have to leave the room for a second. My daughter did this stuff at one (the ripping, she never reallly hit or anything until these kids came along). Seriously he is where my daughter was a year ago and they are the same age. I know all kids are different, and I used to working with kids with delays, but I often wonder if $3 an hour is worth having to constantly be on edge and have my kids getting hurt.

But I am doing much better today.

I really hope things work out with this new Anti-d. Jen. Get some sleep. I don't know how you do it, a house, a child, a husband, a job and classes.

Tracy I hear ya on the snack thing. I need to learn to do that too. Or pack something when I know we will be out and about a long time so I don't get fast food. I'm sorry to hear about your husband being so negative. I can get that way and I know how miserable I must be to live with, and your husband sounds alot worse than me.

Well, I need to get going. No nap time repreive for me today, somebody has been up at all times today. Everybody, that is except my husband. My daughetr was sick last night and up crying and boucing off teh walls alternatley ALL night. We got no sleep. My hsuband took the brunt of it b/c she wanted nothing to do with me. But still I got no sleep. We all have colds and I was kind of hoping since he took the day off, I'd give him a break in the morninga nd he could give me a break in teh afternoon. Well, it's only 2 so MAYBE there's a chance of that.
~misty

YOU ARE ONLY GETTING PAID $3 A HOUR TO WATCH THIS KID!!!!!! Sorry but are you mental????? I pay my sitter about $8 when she comes to sit in the evening and my son doesn't give her one single problem. I figure that I should at least pay her minimum wage because she could be out working at McD's for the same amount of money. I know there is a wage disparity between Canada and the US about what minimum wage is and maybe I am overpaying her but I figure that I am paying for good care. For watching this child when he is causing such **** in your house you should be getting paid a lot more. Figure that you are eating more and causing yourself grief and problems to your own children and house and pet, sorry that $3 is not worth it. Tell that mom to take her kid somewhere else. You probably feel sorry for him but honey it's not worth it. Sounds to me like he needs a lot more than what you can give him. Sorry I don't mean to sound harsh but why should have to put up with all that for practically no money?

Haven't done much of anything today, I'm making myself a list for the next couple of days, I"m hoping to get a ton of stuff done around the house. I finally picked out a colour for painting the living/dining room. I've been taking stuff off the walls and doing a little packing but really I want to get back to the basement as it is such a pit right now. Dh has been okay it sounds like today, maybe these pills are doing something for him.