Ok, so according to my 11 year old I am the Hitler of momdom. She wants to start wearing makeup and i think she is too young. Am I being too prudish? What are your opinions? We agreed together that we will take your opinions into account. ( An yes we know it is just an opinion, so no hard feelings on your answers)
I don't think she is necessarily too young for a touch of eyeshadow/liner and perhaps some colored lip gloss. That was about the age I first started experimenting with makeup. Just the basics of lip and eye color--something light and innocent looking, no Goth-queen stuff yet, lol.
At heart it is of course your decision, but makeup can be a fun way to express yourself; it's like fingerpaints for the face. And as long as you're there to show her how to do it correctly, it can also be a wonderful bonding time for you. Hope this helps!
I have a 14 yr. old daughter so we went through this pretty recently. At age 12 I let her start shaving her legs and wearing a little light colored eyeshadow such as pink or light tan with lip gloss. Many kids her age were wearing a lot of make-up including foundation and I explained that I personally didn't feel she needed all that. She uses a little eye liner now, but has never used foundation. I am a little stricter than most of her friends parents and that's OK with me. My parents were strict too. She knows she is not able to date at all until she is 16. When she starts dating , the boy will have to come inside and meet me and DH. No pulling up and honking, crap. It doesn't hurt a bit to be strict with them, it's for their own protection and I stress this to my daughter who doesn't naturally see it the way I do. Good luck and I know you will make the right decision for both you and your daughter.
I'd hold off a little longer - I felt the same way your daughter feels, and thought that the entire world got to do stuff I didn't get to do (generally this consisted of wearing far too revealing clothes and makeup). I have a real problem with young girls wearing make-up, 'cause I feel that it's sexualizing them. I know that the few times I borrowed my friends' make-up and skimpy tops when I was 12 I got a lot of attention from men that I didn't know how to deal with at that age, and I could definitely have run into some serious problems. (As it was this still did some lasting damage on how I viewed my body and what I put it through, but that's another story). Basically, yeah - I htink it's too young. It'll be tough for now, but your daugther will appreciate it when she's older - I know that I really appreciate that my parents stood their ground. My mom decided I could start wearing it at 13, so she took me to the Body Shop and I had my colors done, and the make-up was part of my birthday present. I respected the right to wear make-up more, since I had to wait for it, and I also knew how to put it on properly. I know I'm completely rambling, but I agree that eleven is too young and I think you should hold your position.
I'm an old fuddy duddy, so I think 11 is too young to be wearing makeup - the purpose of which is to make a woman more sexually attractive. I know people are going to say that wearing makeup makes one 'feel better' about oneself but it really means that wearing makeup makes us feel that other people find us more attractive.
Kids are becoming sexualized at earlier and earlier ages in our culture and I think it's time parents took a stand unless they want their children to attract unwanted attention (especially with all the creeps out there these days).
I'm 34 and very seldom wear make up. I screamed and yelled at my mum because I wasn't allowed to wear it to school until I was 16, which to me, at the time, seemed so old!
I agree with tipsygypsy and lillybelle. A bit of lipgloss and eyeliner, and maybe a bit of light coloured eyeshadow, but none of the heavy stuff.
When your old like me, you'll wish you had teenage skin again that doesn't need all that stuff
My opinion is that 11 is too young for daily make up. I think lip gloss is fine for day to day (real gloss, clear or very light pink) as is light colored nail polishes (or some of the fun color kids like - blue and such). However, I think eye shadows, mascara, and blush should be saved for special occasions - school dances, family weddings etc. And even then I think it should be kept very conservative. Of course, if she has a sleepover or all girl party, I say let them have at it - just don't take them out in public afterwards. LOL.
Aside from whether or not make up is acceptable at her age, consider skin care too. If hormones haven't kicked in yet, they soon will and make up that isn't properly removed could cause blemishes on top of what puberty is sure to bring. If you do decide to let her wear make up be certain she's ready to take on the responsibilty of taking it off every night too.
I agree with the other poster who suggested she be taught to apply make up correctly. At whatever age she starts to wear it she'll need to know that there is more to it than just slapping it on as thick as she can.
Well, this doesn't answer your question, but I would be sure she knows exactly who Hitler was and how he viciously murdered millions of people. I am alarmed by how many people semi-jokingly toss around the phrases **** and Hitler. Out of respect for the millions of victims of his evil regime, perhaps she could come up with a better militant phrase for her mother.
Our children need to be familiar with history...that is our only hope of eliminating genocide...that is still going on today.
My daughter turned 12 just a few weeks ago, and that was when I allowed her to start wearing makeup on a daily basis (and shaving her legs. I let her start shaving her underarms earlier because the hair was causing her to smell sweaty when she got hot). Before that she could wear a little lip gloss, a bit of blush and sometimes some eyeshadow on special occasions, but not to school. Now I've bought her some mascara, some concealer (she's inherited my undereye darkness), and an eyelash curler and told her she can wear it when she wants to. She wore it the first day of school, then decided she would rather sleep the extra 15 minutes instead of put on makeup, which suits me FINE.
I've not bought foundation for her and she hasn't asked for it. I don't think she needs it.
I know from seeing her friends at school that many of them started wearing it last year. Also many of the girls at her school are allowed to bleach or dye their hair. That surprises me much more than the makeup.
Well, this doesn't answer your question, but I would be sure she knows exactly who Hitler was and how he viciously murdered millions of people. I am alarmed by how many people semi-jokingly toss around the phrases **** and Hitler. Out of respect for the millions of victims of his evil regime, perhaps she could come up with a better militant phrase for her mother.
Our children need to be familiar with history...that is our only hope of eliminating genocide...that is still going on today.
Sorry if this is a bit off topic but I totally agree with this post - Hitler's name is bandied about and applied to just about any person who is disagreeable these days. History is sadly neglected in schools today - political correctness is the name of the game.
I say that 11 is too young for makeup... I agree that maybe a light/clear lip gloss would be ok.
I see that makeup is for women, not little girls. And people wonder why these younger generations take it to extremes with clothes and makeup at such young ages - its cuz the parents never put limits on them.
I also completely disagree with parents allowing their children to dye their hair (for anything other than like, Halloween). I'm only 24, but I think that children need to be protected and be allowed their childhood. They want to grow up so fast and it seems that (stereotypically) the parents allow it.
BTW, I didn't ever really want to wear makeup - my mom got me a makeup appointment with her Mary Kay lady when I was 14 (I was never a girlie girl), and I still didn't wear it cuz it was too time consuming. I did start dying my hair in high school - but I did it without my parents permission, and I paid for it myself, and it wasn't ever dyed to any outrageous color (always went for reddish browns).
My DD and I have had the hair-dyeing conversation and I have told her absolutely not. She has beautiful , thick brown hair and I know it is a decision that she would regret. Many of her friends have dyed their hair, but as far as I'm concerned "it's not happening". She does think I am too strict on these type of issues. But, tough, I'm the parent, it's my job. She'll know what I'm talking about when she grows up and has kids. But, for now I'm what she's got.
My DD and I have had the hair-dyeing conversation and I have told her absolutely not. She has beautiful , thick brown hair and I know it is a decision that she would regret.
I went through the same thing. I have auburn/chesnut colored hair. I wanted to color it something else. My mother had a coniption saying, "Your hair is gorgeous! Why would you want another color?!"
"Because I hate my hair."
And I did.
Eventually my mother let me do what I wanted to do. I bleached it blonde. At first I wanted to kill myself, but I eventually got used to it and when my own color started to show through a little bit, it actually looked very nice. I enjoyed being a 'blonde' for about 2 years. Then I decided to let my orginal color grow back, which is where it's been ever since.
Sometimes you need to let them 'live and learn.' My mother may have thought my hair was gorgeous (and frankly so did everyone else - to this day I get compliments everywhere I go) but *I* didn't.
Of course it also depends on how old your daughter is. If I had a daughter that was maybe only 12 or 13 and wanted to dye her hair, I'd probably say no. But if she would be 16 or something like that, then yeah, I'd let her do what she wants to do and let her see for herself how beautiful her hair is once she no longer has it.
All my life I hated my hair. But now that it's been a different color and I eventually grew tired of having to touch it up constantly and do my roots and all that other stuff that gets boring, I now LIKE my hair and consider it to be my best feature. Years and years of hating my hair... until I bleached it. Now I appreciate it more
As for the original question of letting an 11-year-old wear make-up, I really don't know. It would depend on how 'mature' she is and whether or not you trust her judgement and also how MUCH make-up she wants to wear. But in my personal opinion, no, I don't think a child that young should be wearing it.
Kids are becoming sexualized at earlier and earlier ages in our culture
Amen to that. My son is 7 and talks like he's 25 sometimes. I've only got a few years (or less) before I have to have 'the talk' with him and I've already started talk about drugs and the like.
Too young! Perhaps a little bit when she starts the 7th grade--tinted lip gloss, brown mascara if her lashes are light--but that's it! In the meantime, you could take her to the Clinique counter, or the local drugstore, to help her purchase skin care products--cleanser, toner, sunscreen, whatever she might need.
I had to wait until I was 12 and in the 7th grade, did the same for my daughters, and will "butt in" if necessary when my granddaughter thinks she's old enough to wear make-up!
Totally off topic but need opinions
And as long as you're there to show her how to do it correctly, it can also be a wonderful bonding time for you. Hope this helps!
