My brother was 12 years old and stuck at an airport flying back from our dad's to his moms. I remember him calling from the airport cuz he lost his ticket (and he was halfway home). My dad said "what the f**k to do you want ME to do about it" and hung up. My dad is great to me but wasn't so great to my other siblings. I think because he raised me, we had a different bond. I felt so bad I went out to the truck to get the information for the airflight. I was gonna call them myself. I tried to do it in secret because my dad was already being a major jerk. He caught me and asked me if I was gonna "bail him out" (said it in a snide way). I can remember us yelling and then I said, well somebody has to. He told me to let him bail himself out. I told him, he is a MINOR. Who is the grownup in this relationship (between my dad and my brother)? I don't think it is YOU! I stormed off and defiantly TRIED to page my brother and make sure everything was okay. I couldnt' reach him. I heard later that someone found him crying and felt sorry and looked up his ticket and sent him home.

My point to everything is no matter how much we want our parents to be grown ups in every situation, it may not happen. As a child of his, I could do NOTHING to change his mind, though I did try to change the situation.

Talk it through with your friend. Chances are she felt just as bad.

Awww, poor thing :(

And you're right, parents don't always act mature about things. Lord knows my parents were the king and queen of childish behavior. They definitely don't always handle things the way they should. I'm no perfect parent either. But I DO know I wouldn't put my daughter in a position that she'd have to tell her friend she was no longer invited or leave my son stranded at an airport.

I swear, sometimes the parents are more childish than the kids.

I'd evaluate the friendship. Where is it going? Is she there for you when you need a friend? Are you there for her? Is it completely one sided?

You're friend should have known that her mother doesn't care for you and arranged to have the get together some place else where every one she wanted was welcome. (Hey, it'a a fact of life that not everybody likes everybody. Try not to take it personally about her mom. She sounds very immature.)

Not every friendship stands the test of time, we grow in different directions with our life experiences and such.

I've lost track of what was a good friend when I was in college she married, dropped out of college had 2 kids became a sahm, her husband didn't make much money and they had the difficulties of making ends meet on a basically a little over poverty level. I made different choices. We stopped having any common ground after a few years. I miss what we had when we were in college but not what we had shortly before the friendship fizzled out. That wasn't worth the hassle.

Sarah

I agree with a lot of what other posters have said, it is her mother's house. I would never want to force anyone to do something they didn't want to do.

BUT, that being said, my thought was, that if I was her, 33, an adult and I had genuine friends that I wanted to see and my mother couldn't deal with it, I would find somewhere else to have the get together. If my mother wanted to be the petty one, then it should be her to miss the first gathering. I would do the "adult" thing with my friends and then see my mother after. That is, IF these were people I really wanted to see.

Yes, it is very telling about the relationship between mother and daughter, but it also tells a lot about how the friendship is going. Don't stress and don't count on her, just have fun however you feel comfortable. :hug: