My boyfriend has decided that its time for him to start eating better aswell, but, he is they type that is going to make this a competition between the two of us. He has been doing it for the last two days and been driving me bonkers! i dont want to compete with him i just want us to support each other, anyone else have this problem?
Aw first off I'm sorry because I know that is a sucky feeling. My dad is like that, he tries to make everything competitive and with my history of an eating disorder that is not what I need. I suggest just sitting down with him and telling him, you're happy that he wants to get healthier, but that it bothers you when he turns it into a competition. You could tell him that every body is different and it may not work for you both to do the same thing, or to have to beat each others records. If you tell him how you feel and in a nice way, he should back off. If not, he's a jerk. lol
Hes going to bomb fast if he looks at this as a race or by competing in anyway.
I would exsplain that he can work with you to find better ways of eating and cooking and even working out.
Its something to help the both of you live longer.
So anything you two learn that can benifit the both of you then thats what its all about. BUt making it a challenge between you both will hurt what your doing and tell him that now before it even gets to that point. Just tell him that you want to see both of you get more healthy.
yeah i think im gonna sit him down tonight and talk to him, its about all i can do haha, dont get me wrong i am one for competition, but not in this type of thing, id rather play a sport and kick his butt but he is a pretty good guy...hopefully he will tone it down a notch or two
If talking doesn't work, then you can simply refuse to compete. Every time he says something like, "I lost more weight than you!" just go about your business, kind of absentmindly say, "mmm that's nice," and then change the subject. If he doesn't get a rise out of you then he'll drop it sooner or later. Even if he doesn't, non-responsiveness will keep YOUR blood pressure down.
It will get real discouraging fast because men lose weight faster and more easily then women. It's all genetics and don't let me get started on my genetics soap box because I can go on and on about the short stick women get with that. I mean yes, back in the days when famines were highly probable we needed the extra fat and the ability to maintain our weight in case we had babies....oops, looks like I jumped on my soap box after all.
"It's not a race. We are getting healthy together."
Good luck, and no matter how tempting it will be to smack him up side the head with a skillet try to control yourself.
Hes going to bomb fast if he looks at this as a race or by competing in anyway.
Precisely! Had a co-worker who was the same way. She kept pressuring me for a competition. I finally agreed to a challenge WITHTOU involving money. She tried to get me to do a wager in many different forms and I kept saying no. LOL So we did the challenge without any winnings attached and I lost weight...she gained. Irony is such a cruel cruel word.
LOL thanks guys!!!!!!!! awesome advice........i think i have a soft skillet somewhere too you guys are all awesome, i cant wait till he gets home from work so i can tell him how its gonna be HAHAHa
My boyfriend has recently started working out and lifting weights again, and eating better too - mainly I think, because I inspired him a bit
Luckily he hasn't been too competitive, just goes around flexing his arms a bit more
He may just be excited about doing something - thats good though!
You mentioned that you'd rather beat him at sports and stuff, well if he's getting competitive, why not suggest when you talk to him, that you'd rather not get competitive about the actual weight loss, but if he wants to challenge you to whatever game you two like (say basketball, tennis or something) you'd be willing to do that.
If he is really wanting to compete, there may be a way to do that and reward yourselves for doing a good job without the competition revolving around pounds on the scale.
Explain to him that losing pound weight is usually quicker and easier for men than it is for women, and that if he wants to compete with you-that the competition be revolved around fitness and personal habits rather than scale weight.
You could set up a little chart, and each set certain goals for the week-such as getting in 8-10 cups of water a day, each of you not having any unhealthy food binges, or something fitness related-such as walking 2 miles every day. Your goals may be different because of your gender and fitness level-but the competitive points should be similar. You could each get a check or star each day for getting your goal exercise in-for you it may be walking 2 miles a day, and for him it may be biking 5 miles or something-but similar.
Rather than competing on the scale, you could compete on how many goals you met each week. Say you got in all your water, met your exercise goals each day-so you have 14 "points". He missed a water goal one day, so he has 13. It makes competition more for the healthy habits-not the scale results.
This could turn ugly
If not, he's a jerk. lol
but he is a pretty good guy...hopefully he will tone it down a notch or two
