Hello.

I have successfully lost over 59 kg (130 pounds), but did gain some back the past year. I know why I have too - it's just... I'm at a point in my life where I literally have no reason to keep living. No friends. No relationship. No real goals. I know this sounds dramatic. But it's true. I've dealt with depression my whole life (and refuse to get help for it).
Sometimes I am motivated to lose what I've gained back (13 kg, 30 pounds) and get back to 68 kg (150 pounds), which is where I was before I regained. Then I feel like why bother, say to **** with it, and eat junk food. The only reason to lose weight is because I feel down right crummy being overweight. But when there is no light at the end of the tunnel it is easy to get side tracked and eat whatever tastes and feels good in the moment.
I don't know if I need to improve my life, give up, or just suck it up and keep going. I have all these ideas and dreams in my head of things that will happen when I lose weight but they don't happen! I just sit at home, do nothing, and nothing changes. Not even sure what I want from life. I know I can't possibly ask anyone to tell me, but it's just so difficult! I must come up with the answers myself. I should lose weight because I want to. To feel good, to look good, to be happy. I just wish it were that simple.

Hi Miranda,
I know what it feels like to eat your emotions. I don't have any for sure answers, but I have some suggestions and some prayers are going up for you to overcome this.

Have you ever tried a ketogenic diet. I've heard the good fat in that kind of diet (like avocado) can help mood and help you control your cravings more. This is a diet that you eat protein, a lot of healthy fats and few carbs. I tried it and I really feel great in my mood when I eat that way. I can fight off the bad negative thoughts easier.

Congratulations on the 130 pound loss. Many people couldn't do that....You can get the other pounds off. I'm sure you can. The pounds are secondary to getting a better focus on life. It appears to me you do want help, because you are reaching out right now. Keep reaching and embracing the good in life.

I'm praying for you right now,,,,,and if you want to do a low carb style of diet, I'm in that section and there is a lot of nice peeps over there to help encourage you,,don't give up! Never give Up!

Welcome! Congratulations on your initial loss; that's something that so many of us strive toward and never attain.

From what I've read (never having had the problem myself, since I can't lose that much) maintenance is just as hard, if not harder than the initial weight loss. Like you say, there aren't specific goals anymore. And depression on top of it makes it even harder.

I suggest you may want to check out the Maintainer's forum on this board. They've been there, and they have a strong group for support.

It is hard to convince a depressed mind that a healthy body will ease the depression. And for many of us, keeping up healthy habits aren't enough to combat those feelings anyway.

You said you refuse to get help, but I do think you would benefit from finding a few tools to help you deal with it in a healthy manner. Is it seasonal? Chronic? Related to a specific incident? My point is, you don't have to live in the cloud of depression and as you've learned, losing weight won't necessarily fix the way you feel. While you may think your body needs to lose weight, your mind could also use a TLC. I wish I had a resource I could direct you to. I've found great support on a few forums and there are tons of online resources for how to manage depression. I tend to get seasonal depression and have had a lot of success with a sun light.

Wishing you the best.

Hi, thank you, I will look into it now.

That's very true. No, it's not seasonal. I'm going to try to be more open to ideas about managing it. Thank you for the suggestions.

You're not the only one who is duped by thr false promises of weight loss. Losing weight does not guarantee happiness, a boyfriend, a bunch of friends, a life that you like, it doesn't even guarantee that you'll like yourself. Weight loss guarantees weightloss. Everything else you have to work towards seperately just like all the other skinny people do. Think of how many thin people you know who don't have a job, are miserable and don't have a boyfriend. That's clue enough that being skinny is not some ticket to a guaranteed happy life.

Self confidence and self love are skills and you have to work on them every day, diligently. There are many resources out there for this. I find it very concerning though why you wouldn't seek help for depression. Try to imagine someone with cancer who refuses to seek treatment and then can't understand why they are suffering. If you can't help yourself in this how can weightloss help? There is so much help out there for depression, why not make use of it?