Floppy thread made me think...
 

...about sex drive.

And, if I am being honest, with weight loss mine is down.

Is yours up or down?

Mine goes up when I lose. :o

Way down. That's very normal for most people, the process of being in energy deficit long term suppresses things like androgens (and rebalances them more normally, for many of us who were estrogen dominant as often happens with obesity). Non-essential bodiy functions tend o get down-regulated when food is scarce or stress is high, which is exactly what larger, longer weight loss does. When you hit maintenance calories the situation should improve dramatically.

I find exercise gives me the same high as well. So that is weird.

UP! But I think that mostly just because I feel better about myself.

Like a boy going through puberty! :o It's craaaaazy.

So far, there's a lot of up and some down.

Originally Posted by Silverfire:
UP! But I think that mostly just because I feel better about myself.

This!

Mine hasn't really changed. Although my attitude towards "doing more work", has gone up. Haha

Hmm. Looks like I'm in the minority.

Up, mostly due to confidence. But we are not frequent flyers, and never have been. ;)

It would probably be up cuz i am feeling better about myself but my marriage isnt like that for me at this point and time so, oh well.

Had I been given the choice, it would be up, as I'm feeling better about myself which is a major factor for most women as I understand.

It makes sense that guys who need to put in more energy (well, usually) are not feeling very much up to it when they're in a deficit.

As things are with our twins though, it's all very theoretical discussion. On the plus side, they're a perfect contraception.

Originally Posted by :
As things are with our twins though, it's all very theoretical discussion. On the plus side, they're a perfect contraception.

lmfao!!!!!!!!

My twin 2-year old boys are breaking my house down. The house I made nice!

And they wake up at 7.30am EVERY DAY. Regardless of when they or I go to bed. EVERY FRICKING DAY!

Saturday? Tired? 7.30am they're up! OUCH!

Ever tried sex before 7am on the weekend? I haven't. I couldn't!

:rofl:

Mine's down, cause I put all my energy into excercising and get a high from that. Also I am at quite a calorie deficit so I'd either be jumping up and down on the bed (not having sex) high off coffee and exercising, or I'd be asleep!

Originally Posted by elvislover324:
I know, Ian. And I don't want to go totally O/T but that part sucks. :( But if a baby is conceived (!!), it will be totally out of love and desire for this beautiful child. I do have a feeling it's going to be the IVF that does the job if it happens and even that represents love to me. :)

Infertility here, too. Totally sucks having to perform on demand! Lol But my hubby and I still get a kick out of blaming our youngest son's CRAZY personality on the fact that I practically abused my husband that "fateful day" because my fertility monitor had an eggie in the window. He says that angry sperm make for an aggressive baby....lolol. :dizzy:

I was afraid to click on this thread not knowing what type of mischief Ian was getting into today. :D

Both me and my husband have lost weight (I lost more than 5x he has!) and I can tell you the attraction and confidence factor is WAY up. He loved me at both my high and lower weights (thank God for that, I don't know how he did it) but I'm positive my new clothes and new attitude have fueled the spark again. But alas, my meds I was on for 6 months *killed* my drive in that department and haven't come back yet. Try baby planning under time constraints with no desire (in the "mood" I mean, I want the baby more than life itself!) to get the job done!

Yeah. Careful with that Elvis.

Sex "when you have to" for babies is tough.

I really struggled with that. It felt weird.

Lightspeed here! One of the best parts of this journey is the increase in stamina!

Originally Posted by IanG:
lmfao!!!!!!!!

My twin 2-year old boys are breaking my house down. The house I made nice!

And they wake up at 7.30am EVERY DAY. Regardless of when they or I go to bed. EVERY FRICKING DAY!

Saturday? Tired? 7.30am they're up! OUCH!

Ever tried sex before 7am on the weekend? I haven't. I couldn't!

:rofl:

I wish I wish I wish my girls would ever wake up at 7.30 am. Now 5.30-6.00 am sounds like their time to join their mum and dad in bed. Needless to say they're not having a brother or sister anytime soon, unless I find one on sale in supermarket.

They do fall asleep shortly after 7 pm but that's of no help as by then all we want is to down, hold each other's hand and sleep...thus continue living in our happy sex free parenthood paradise :dizzy:

I know, Ian. And I don't want to go totally O/T but that part sucks. :( But if a baby is conceived (!!), it will be totally out of love and desire for this beautiful child. I do have a feeling it's going to be the IVF that does the job if it happens and even that represents love to me. :)

Mine is down but I couldn't care less. I don't really want to think about sex right now. I'm in therapy so right now I just want to get to know myself and who I am and have a normal social life.

Originally Posted by IanG:
Yeah. Careful with that Elvis.

Sex "when you have to" for babies is tough.

I really struggled with that. It felt weird.

I second that! Putting pressure on yourselves to conceive is very stressful and might be counter-productive. Been there, done that!

Originally Posted by :
I know, Ian. And I don't want to go totally O/T but that part sucks. But if a baby is conceived (!!), it will be totally out of love and desire for this beautiful child.

My last comment on this Elvis. Promise. But if you or your husband ever say "not now, not this month" just accept that. Else you can get a lot of tension in the marriage in the race to the finish line. I am not sure if my marriage has ever fully recovered from that.

Up through confidence--leave those lights on:)

Originally Posted by IanG:
My last comment on this Elvis. Promise. But if you or your husband ever say "not now, not this month" just accept that. Else you can get a lot of tension in the marriage in the race to the finish line. I am not sure if my marriage has ever fully recovered from that.

In my experience, the problem was that we were trying on specific days because of ovulation tests, etc. So, it was appointment sex ... coupled with expectation, frustration, etc. With our last child we pretty much gave up on "trying" after many months of not getting pregnant. Then, when we least expected it, when we were not even "trying", she got pregnant.

I promise not to go off topic again after this reply, sorry Ian!

I'm on a tight schedule as I got 6 months in March to get pregnant from my cancer doctor. :( The easiest, fastest way would be through IVF except I'm having issues (low egg count and some hormone issues, can't do artificial hormones as cancer is hormone dependent). If I'm not pregnant by September, I have to have a hysterectomy. So even though I'm trying not to stress out and rush into "scheduled" time, I don't really have a choice. :( But thank you all for sharing all of your experiences! And I could still conceive naturally with my few eggs, I only NEED one!! *keep me in your prayers please!!*

Originally Posted by elvislover324:
I promise not to go off topic again after this reply, sorry Ian!

I'm on a tight schedule as I got 6 months in March to get pregnant from my cancer doctor. :( The easiest, fastest way would be through IVF except I'm having issues (low egg count and some hormone issues, can't do artificial hormones as cancer is hormone dependent). If I'm not pregnant by September, I have to have a hysterectomy. So even though I'm trying not to stress out and rush into "scheduled" time, I don't really have a choice. :( But thank you all for sharing all of your experiences! And I could still conceive naturally with my few eggs, I only NEED one!! *keep me in your prayers please!!*

Wow. Tough cookie there. :( My heart breaks for you

Although not identical, I conceived in a similar fashion. I won't bore you with the details, but just trying to give you hope.

:hug:

Depends, I see my hubby every other weekend because he's stationed 4.5 hours away so I get happy when I get to see him. Some weekends it's several
Times, and some it's only once. But I don't think it'll slow down too much when he comes back. He's pretty smexy.

Elvis... you are always in my prayers... and God will grace you and your husband!!

IAN you are just TOOOO Much.... I love that you created this thread :) I think with women... alot of our Sexuality is mental and by getting a lighter body... we are happier with ourselves and thus more amorous... Now... that is not for ALLLLLLL women :)

Maybe they have some native drink in Turkey that will raise your libido so to speak :) Just gotta sneak it back in the suitcase .... In time.. you will be a (sorry about this) Stallion again :) truly and maybe you will just have to stop your wife from persuing you :)

My sex drive has always been high and so far remains unaffected by my weight loss. I think my husband might actually be relieved if my sex drive dropped a little bit!

Sex drive? What's that?

Mine went the way of the dodo bird a couple of years ago and has not come back even after the weight I've dropped.

Mine is down, I also find that I use most of energy exercising. Not to say that I couldn't come up with more energy for play time but, for some reason I'm just not all that interested :shrug:.

Originally Posted by Novus:
Like a boy going through puberty! :o It's craaaaazy.

Me, too! I think it's bc I'm eating 85% fat and have more energy for everything.

Originally Posted by ChickieChicks:
He says that angry sperm make for an aggressive baby.

Made me laugh till I literally cried!!!

Mine is way up too...but my BF can't keep his hands off me and my new slimming curves. He of course says he likes me no matter what but I can tell he's looking at me different and touching me more/all the time. It's delightful. :D

Early morning is the best time if you have toddlers! (IMO) That's the only time I can be 100% certain they won't storm the barricade! Plus it gets the day off on a positive note.

Mine is about the same, but we are "frequent flyers", as it was so hilariously put! I don't think I have hours in the day for more given both of our busy schedules, as well as having two toddlers. But I am feeling better about myself, so while quantity remains steady, quality is up! :)

Thanks for the threa, Ian! I was actually thinking about this today. My drive used to be crazy high but its so low lately. My man is sexy as ever so i imagine its just my own emotional reaction as i get to reknow my body. I feel desirable but i keep holding back.

And elvislover, thank you for sharing that with us :) this is such a big year in yoir life and your avatar means more than ever :)

Elvislover that's one though situation you're in...I shall keep you and your husband in my prayers.

We conceived our twins after 5 years of infertility and several losses. Evnetually IVF worked for us and I still have days I can't quite believe it has happened. And they'll be two in June!

The important thing to remember here is that God loves you and He wants you to be happy. He wants to bless you. It might not always be in time and way we expect, but it will happen. One way or another, I shall pray you keep your faith and are blessed very soon!!!

Re morning sex with toddlers...I mean seriously...if 5 am is my only chance to "fly", I'm staying on the ground forever!

I try not to think about it because my husband is deployed. LOL ask me again later this year.

Really though, I'm not sure if I could distinguish between it being up from losing weight or stopping birth control pills.