I have thought this for a very long time. There's something disfunctional about the appetites of us fat people. I see my slim friends (in their 30s and 40s) regulate their intake (and exercise regularly), but I also see that it is not so much of a struggle for them as it is for me. I want, want, want and they seem to have an easier time of stopping when they are full or when they think they have had enough.
The reason this discussion is worth having is that it allows us to acknowledge that the problem isn't that slim people have more 'will power' than fat people; it's that our desire for food is greater and thus we need substantially more will power than slim people to maintain a reasonable weight.
I don't know how much I believe this but...
on an episode of biggest loser last year the doctor used brain scans to demonstrate to people the differences between the brains of healthy weight people and overweight people. Supposedly different parts of the brain would light up when someone craved a certain food. And they could tell when that person was satisfied. Heavy people's brains showed that they desired the food far more than healthy weight people and it took twice as much of the food before they were satisfied. They didn't say if this changed when a heavy person lost weight.
I agree that it's important to have an open mind about how and why different people gain weight. At the same time, my research supports the view that basal metabolic rates do not differ widely in people of the same age, gender, height, weight, and lean body mass -- perhaps by 5 to 10 percent at the most.
I'm open to be proven wrong, but for the time being I continue to suspect appetite, underestimation of food intake, and overestimation of physical activity as the key drivers of weight gain.
I tend to agree with this---just from what I've read and observed. However, like you say, there are exceptions to every rule, so undoubtedly there are those lucky few who can actually eat to their heart's content and not gain. I just know I ain't one of 'em!!
I agree that appetite is very difficult to change, but we can experiment with the types of foods and eating patterns that are most likely to leave us satisfied. If metabolism is the culprit, we're stuck. Freelance
I pretty much agree. I'm working on nailing down the "cycle" of foods and eating that my body needs to feel full. It seems to change depending on several factors and I'm attempting to find the pattern.
I think that habits are hugely important when determining someone's weight. I mean, look at Korea or Argentina - they don't have anywhere NEAR the weight problems we do, and it's very unlikely that only westernized countries have slow metabolisms.
But then again, there are several studies that suggest that overweight or obese people have slower metabolisms, especially after they lose weight. They're not entirely sure if the metabolism was slower to start with or if it became that way after gaining weight.
Last edited by LiannaKole; 01-24-2012 at 09:02 PM.
But yeah, I have thin friends who can "eat anything."
Some of them get full fast and lose interest, like your friend. Some of them eat very lightly most days of the week and only eat more when they're out to dinner or something. It balances out, basically.
The one exception I can think of is my brother. I was around him for years day in and day out. He could eat a huge bowl of rice, a frozen dinner, a couple fish fillets, a handful of candy and two donuts for all meals (or an equivalent), 8-10 cups of hot chocolate for a snack, and half a gallon of juice a day. He also barely walked around let alone exercised, and still was thin as a rail. But then again he's also almost 6 feet tall.
Last edited by LiannaKole; 01-24-2012 at 08:34 PM.
<<But then again, there are several studies that suggest that overweight or obese people have slower metabolisms, especially after they lose weight. They're not entirely sure if the metabolism was slower to start with or if it became that way after gaining weight. If you want references I can dig some up. Let me know.>>
What I read recently is that metabolism slows down temporarily when you're losing weight, but revs back to normal when you bring your calories up to maintenance levels. (In other words, years of yo-yoing do not permanently damage the metabolism.) Of course, the new normal (BMR) will be lower than the old normal, but that's simply because it takes more energy to keep 250 pounds alive than to keep 150 pounds alive.
>>>What I read recently is that metabolism slows down temporarily when you're losing weight, but revs back to normal when you bring your calories up to maintenance levels.<<<
Yes eventually. But after weight loss studies showed that the metabolism was still slower, so the person had to eat fewer calories to maintain the same weight that a never-overweight person had. It was only after several years that the body was able to eat more calories and maintain the weight. It was something like after being so overweight and then dropping all the weight that it took the body a while to regulate itself "normally" again.
Interesting stuff, I think. It'll be cool to see what researchers find in future years.
In reading your title, the first thing that came to mind is an old co-worker/friend of mine (sadly who passed away a few years ago) was thin....lean and thin. She too claimed she could eat everything and anything. Then she tells me one day she was so busy....she forgot to eat. You wrote that about your friend too.....FORGET TO EAT? Are you kidding me? I know when I'm busy and wrapped up in a task....eating will take a back burner. I've enjoyed myself for hours at a casino, and "put off" eating, but trust me, forgetting to eat is never ever going to happen to me.
I think that food isn't a true pleasure for that type person, so they could never, for instance, grow up to be a chef... - and also b/c they don't pay attention to regular meal times and can even go over when their bodies will naturally hint....HEY FEED ME...their stomachs are smaller and when they do eat get fuller faster and can't finish their meals.
Frankly, I'd be mad if I habitually spent good hard earned money on food that got pushed away, went stale, had to be eaten by someone else as leftovers, etc. My husband continually jokes with me about pasta, my favorite food in the whole world, when there's for instance leftover baked ziti -- "for heaven's sake, its a few mouthfuls....it cost 20cents a pound...throw it away. Its not like its prime rib." Ah, but to me its better than prime rib!
Point made---those "I can eat anything" folks....most likely hardly eat. God bless them.
I completely agree. I have thin friends who say they can eat whatever they want and never gain a pound and it's true, because their version of 'whatever they want' and my version of 'whatever I want' are two very different things I don't know where I got into a cycle of thinking I had to eat a whole packet of cookies instead of one or two, but I know it's a cycle these friends have never been in!
I don't know if it's about differing appetites necessarily as I used to eat all the time when I wasn't hungry at all. I guess it's more about choice (however conscious or otherwise that may be).
I'm not sure if it's always different for men and women..I haven't had a chance to observe a "naturally" thin woman, but my ex boyfriend was a naturally skinny person. I seen him eat bags of chips, half gallons of ice cream, alcoholic drinks, Baileys(which is very high calorie), whatever he wanted at restaurants and buffets... in my attempts to keep up with him and join him in eating I did start gaining back the weight I had lost before meeting him!
so I think some people do have a faster metabolism than others or the ability to not store the excess calories.
and I think some women will say they don't diet and eat whatever they want because maybe we are self conscious saying we have to diet and watch what we eat, like some women don't like to appear as a high maintenance dieter type.
<<Then she tells me one day she was so busy....she forgot to eat.>>
Yeah, this stuff kills me. I'm as likely to forget to eat as to forget to breathe. The only time in my life when I lost my appetite -- and it was just for a few days -- was when I was deeply depressed after a bad breakup. Milder depression, anxiety and stress have me rooting around the fridge.
As you said, "those people" get less pleasure from food than we do. I suppose that's the upside of being prone to gain weight.
Freelance
Last edited by freelancemomma; 01-25-2012 at 08:14 AM.
My husband is naturally thin (5'11 and weighs 125 lbs. VERY thin). He eats whatever he wants in terms of fast food, pizza, etc. but on the flip side, he doesn't have a large appetite and at work he'll often forget to eat! He also doesn't like ice cream or cake... I can't imagine! When we're at a restaurant and he's satisfied, even if his plate is still half-full, he stops. His attitude surrounding food is much different than mine, he truly eats because he needs to.
My best friend was the kind who could eat whatever she wanted in high school... and she did. Fast food every day, big portions, no exercise, and she was always very small. Well in the last few years her metabolism has slowerd (we're now 27) and she's not able to eat that way anymore. She's nowhere near overweight, 5'3 and probably 125, but she's larger than she'd like to be and she now goes to the gym regularly and makes an effort to eat small portions of healthy food most of the time.
One of the things that has helped my journey so far IS realizing that my "naturally" thin friends were not so "naturally" thin.
I have a friend who eats salads all week so she can go out on the weekend and eat a big meal.
I have a friend who is semi-vegetarian and can't this or that and basically she ends up eating nothing because of her food allergies and issues.
And they both exercise regularly!
Realizing some of this I came to the conclusion that I was fighting windmills with my ideas of that "naturally" thin person. I'm sure some have a high metabolism. But the reality is that most don't and whether it's a psychological thing, a fullness thing, a learned habit or whatever, they eat to live, they don't eat for entertainment.
For me, it's been a process of learning to eat for health, to live, rather than as a way to distract my mind from boredom.
When I'm super busy I CAN forget to eat. But I'm never that busy all the time, so who knows, I might have been a "naturally" thin person if I had been.
I think that food isn't a true pleasure for that type person, so they could never, for instance, grow up to be a chef... - and also b/c they don't pay attention to regular meal times and can even go over when their bodies will naturally hint....HEY FEED ME...their stomachs are smaller and when they do eat get fuller faster and can't finish their meals.
I have had a really persistent cold and lingering congestion for three weeks now, and although I don't feel that bad, I have laryngitis, and very little appetite or taste for food. Mostly because it all tastes like cardboard. I am having a mixed reaction -- hmm, I can keep my calories low without very much effort. But there is certain lack of enjoyment in life going with it, that is kind of depressing. Is this what life is like for my friend who is capable of forgetting to eat for an entire day at a time?
Also, I have a lot of fresh produce that I am trying to figure out how to freeze, etc so as not to waste it.
Realizing some of this I came to the conclusion that I was fighting windmills with my ideas of that "naturally" thin person. I'm sure some have a high metabolism. But the reality is that most don't and whether it's a psychological thing, a fullness thing, a learned habit or whatever, they eat to live, they don't eat for entertainment.
I have a sneaking suspicion that I actually have some sort of a fast metabolism too, as I noticed the following about myself:
1) I lost my weight pretty fast
2) I maintained a high weight eating A LOT of food. I probably should have weighed more.
3) When I thought I weighed 135, I ate to maintain 135. I actually weighed 125 (my scale was off by 10 pounds) and wound up losing 5 pounds that I didn't intend to. At 120 I need to eat more than I ever thought I would at 135!
I keep wondering what I would have wound up like had I been left to my own devices as a child. Reading this thread about naturally thin people reminds me of how I was when I was very little, before my parents would force me to eat.
- and also b/c they don't pay attention to regular meal times and can even go over when their bodies will naturally hint....HEY FEED ME...their stomachs are smaller and when they do eat get fuller faster and can't finish their meals.
I don't know where I got into a cycle of thinking I had to eat a whole packet of cookies instead of one or two, but I know it's a cycle these friends have never been in!
