Up until this year I seen myself as skinny even though I got up to 247! It took seeing myself in glass doors in town for my mind to alter the picture of me. And a picture of me with my mom before she passed on. I keep that picture in my room because my mom looks happy, I look happy but big, really big.
I still dream skinny. Up until I was 30 I weighed in the 130's wearing a size 8. I briefly got smaller going down to a size 4. That's how I look in my dreams, a size 4 usually. So when I wake up and see myself in the mirror I am shocked usually. Most of the time I am still in denial and think I look better that I do. I got down to 184 wearing a size 16 four years ago and thought I look awesome. Though I was still big. But I am slowly realizing that I don't look great anymore. Looking at my pants before or after I put them on helps. They are huge and I am constantly amazed that I am that big. While I seen a size 3 pair of pants at KMART and they looked so tiny that I was amazed that anyone could fit into them though I was one pant size away from them when I was younger.
Upon thinking about it I guess it would truelly depend upon the day as to rather or not I feel fat or thin. Today I feel thin, hehe

Hopefully in two years or less I will be the skinny gal I think I am, that would be nice. I also grew in the 11th grade to 155 before losing back to 131. My friend at the time told me I looked pregnant, which I did. The twenty pounds all went to my stomach. It took my friends comment to realize I needed to lose weight. It was almost reaching 250 to make my realize it this time. I am still big but feel big, at least not today or yesterday. The day before that I felt huge. It just depends on the day now. It is harder to get motivated to walk when I feel small. But I do it for my health and the fact that I am usually proud of myself for walking for two hours, so I do it. Like today I am going to go walking here in a minute. It is beautiful out and it is going to rain tommorrow followed by cold weather the next day.
Anyhow awesome question, really got me thinking. I hate those glass doors
