I don't know what to do about staying motivated!

I seriously need to get moving. I want to be slim and toned. I feel like my weight is holding me back in so many things and for some reason I don't get off my butt and lose it.

So if anybody has any advice or ideas to help me get to the gym everyday, please tell me. I try to stay positve, but I just can't imagine myself ever being the size I want to be at the rate I'm going. I don't want to turn 21 being the same size that I am today.

In my opinion you need to break your weight loss down into mini goals.
You have almost 100 pounds to lose.
Why not break it down into small 5 or 10 lb lots?

My advice is to take it one day at a time.
Set yourself goals that you believe you can achieve.
If its 30 minutes at the gym 3 times a week, then so be it..

If you slip up.. DON'T let your journey stop there.
A bad day is a bad day....

Just do your best.. because its ALL you can do.

You mentioned the gym which is a great thing, but what about your food plan? *They* say that weight loss/management is 80% food/20% exercise. So I urge you to really, really, REALLY focus on that aspect of the equation. Give that a lot of thought and effort.

As far as motivation, well motivation is fine and dandy and can get one started - but I urge you to not rely on it. It doesn't last very long, as I think you've discovered. It never seems to be around when the beer, pizza, pasta and ice cream is and when it's time to get moving.

Therefore I urge you to make a COMMITMENT. An iron clad commitment to *do this* no matter what - NO MATTER WHAT. Without that iron clad commitment it will be next to impossible to get the job done. That commitment is what helps you make the right choices day in and day out. That commitment is what gets you to pass up on *those* foods and choose the *right* foods. That commitment is what will get your tail to the gym or to take a walk instead of slacking off. It's that commitment that give you that stick-to-it-ness - regardless of whether you feel like it or not at the moment. And THAT'S what's needed.

I would also not worry about the numbers. FOCUS on the behaviors. Change those behaviors and the weight will come off - each and every excess pound that you've got. Work on making permanent life time changes. Continue on with a healthy lifestyle, create that calorie deficit and there's no way that the pounds can't come off of you. Continue on. No stopping. Making that commitment to be a trim, slim, healthy, all that you can be person - and you then will find/acquire the tools and skills to get it done. Losing weight and lots of it IS a doable thing. Make no mistake about it. You have the ability to do this. You don't have to be fat if you don't want to be. You do hold the power. You've got the control over this. You hold the key. You absolutely CAN do this - and you should.

DECIDE to do this, commit to do this - formulate a plan, a mode of attack, get excited, get moving, get planning, get, get, get - and transform your life. Stop settling for second best when first is well within your reach.

I commend you for wanting to and dealing with this at a young age. Oh how I wish I would have. Living in a fit, trim, healthy, toned body is better than I ever expected. This is nothing to dread by the way, once you get into it, you GET INTO IT. It takes on a life of it's own and is worth every single bit of effort you put into it - by tons. It is worth it on so many fronts. The added energy, stamina, productivity, self respect, self worth, self confidence, better skin, more clothing choices, feeling fabulous, the compliments, and on and on and on.

Challenge yourself. Push yourself. Master something new! Learn. Prosper. Grow. Discover who you were meant to be. You won't regret it - not for a teeny tiny second.

Hey!

Although going to the gym 5-6 days a week is ideal, the key is that you become more physically active. Go for walks, take the stairs instead of elevator, do some exercise DVDs at home.

And, as rockinrobin says, pay attention to your food. I recently read that it's 60% food, 40% exercise, not 80/20, but the point is, the food is a bigger part of it. Come up with a food plan that is reasonable and that you can stick with. You'll need to stay with your plan for a long time, so cutting calories drastically won't be the best approach.

I agree with simplebutterfly that it's easier to break losing into smaller goals, e.g., lose 10 pounds at a time. Don't make it a rigid schedule based on time, because that's hard to predict. It might take you three weeks to lose 10 pounds or it might take you 2 months--but if you keep on your plan, you will get there!

Good luck!
Jay

For me, yes the actual number is not all that relevant. I mean how can one truly measure it anyway? And of course for each individual it will vary greatly. But I've seen that 80/20 number dozens upon dozens of times.

Regardless of the numbers, I find for myself (again hard to really measure), but I find the number even HIGHER than 80/20.. My food intake is just THAT crucial to the big picture. Not that the exercise ISN'T, but I could be exercising 1/2 the day away, if I don't keep my food firmly in check it won't make one bit of a difference. There's only so many calories exercise can burn and there's SO many MORE calories to be found in most foods. Also, I know there's been times when I skipped a workout and it hasn't affected my weight - I add in some extra calories - my weight IS affected. Which is pretty common from what I've heard.

I guess I just really wanted to stress the importance of the food aspect here. I find it really important to nail that down, first and foremost. Again, not to take away from the very vital exercise aspect. Bottom line it's a winning combination!

I've had the experience that the food is crucial too. I've lost many pounds in the past, gained it back plus some. I incorporated exercise this time around and it has made a huge difference for me.

just a thought about the exercise, I don't know how much you did before you started with the gym. For me, going from zero to five days a week would be extremely difficult to maintain over a long period of time. I worked my way up to 3, have done 4, haven't reached 5. I do some exercise and walking on top of my 3 days.

I don't see it so much as motivation as much as changing my habits. It's fairly easy for me to stick to my exercise regime now (I drag my feet on some days, sure).

it took me a little while to see the muscles getting toned, and for my stamina to build (a month or two to start to seriously see it, if I'm remembering correctly). that IS motivating! also, the number of times I go to the gym and the intensity effects the number on the scale: water retention, bulking, etc. You should expect that.

a large amount of weight to lose is a long haul project and each person has his/her own speed bumps to deal with. it's worth tackling, next year you can be X lbs thinner, X inches less. whatever those numbers might end up being, it's going to be a reward in itself, believe me.

Howdy-
I have classifed three components to a healthy life borrowed from another source
1. Calories, reduce for weight loss, increase for weight gain
2. Exercise for fitness
3. Types of food for nutrition

They do interact but are they not interchangeable. I went to the gym for years, trainer too, and trying to gauge how many calories I burned was an inaccurate guess. My muscles sure felt better but to equate a weight loss to exercise was too vague. Now, I focus on exerice that is sustainable and appeals to me. Horse back riding, ice skating, and simply walking but do not include them in my calorie calculator. If I find I am losing too quickly (what a nice problem I do not have), then I would bump up my calorie count. Or one could set their calorie counter higher, and adjust downward. This, too me, is a more accurate guide of how ones one body burns calories.

Rockinrobin's advice is spot on.

All the best for what you decide to do.

Wow, thank you everybody for these great replies! I'll take your advice and make mini goals, it sounds more rewarding that way.

Thankfully I have a family who has always taught me to eat heathly. The problem might be that my taste buds decided to go a different direction, lol. I have been trying recently to change my eating habits with the help of my mom. I cut out sodas and fried foods. I don't really eat that many sweets. I think my probelm with food is that I don't really have a set meal routine. Are we supposed to eat 3 meals a day or 6 small meals? I never know what works best. I also don't know how to count calories. It's something I've been wanting to try.

I do know that I really need to become commited to working out. So thank you for your very inspiring post rockinrobin! I'm going to try my best to stick to it and change my habits, especially me being sedentary.

I would suggest starting a food diary. Write down EVERYTHING you eat in a little notebook you can keep in your purse. It might be interesting the first day to write it down and then go online (or look back on the nutrition info on the packaging) at the end of the day to see how many calories you are currently consuming.

On work days, it's easy for me to count calories and have a going tally on a slip of paper i count up breakfast and lunch and then see what I have left over for dinner/snacks once i get home. Its harder when I'm off because I have to refrain from boredom eating :/

Also, maybe jumping into 5/days a week is too extreme. I know it would have been for me too. I would have burned out and probably quit. I started just once a week and after a couple of weeks WANTED to go more often so then twice a week. Now, about 3-4 months later my boyfriend and I are challenging ourselves to the Couch to 5k (train on treadmill at home 3 days a week and continue with weights 2 days a week at the gym). I would have never even WANTED to try to run 3 months ago.

My advice is pick something realistic, set yourself up to succeed and THAT will push you forward. Perhaps other people get that same push from diving into exercise 5 days a week, but that's just not how I am motivated.

This will depend on how tech savy you want to be. I love my apps on my ITouch. Recording everything by hand was a major stumbling block for me. I ate 3/4 serving of tamales or 1/3 oz of pecans. I was an engineer in a my former life so math isn't a problem but all of the calculations would be for me.

Take the time to think through how you want to make this a permanent habit.

All the best for what you decide.

More food for thought (oo, sorry I couldn't resist haha)...

I like the idea of setting mini-goals, mine is always to get to the next "0" (160, 150, 140, etc.) but I'm the type of person who will get to 160, jump for joy, and go eat cake or something. and then I'm obviously not at 160 for long. So what helps me is to set a really big, non-weight-loss goal that weight loss will help me get to. My big goal is to run a half marathon on May 1st (and btw this doesn't have to be exercise related at all!). So, even when I see really pretty fat chicks and I think, "See, it's OK, they're pretty and fat, I'll just eat this pizza!" and then feel terrible later... I instead remember that weight loss for this 1/2 marathon is critical (less work for my body, I could run using less effort, maybe go a little faster) and I can't eat 1000 calories a day of just junk food because that won't help me train for it. The weight has been coming off, but it's almost "just" a side effect of the training. And on top of all this, haha... I paid $50 for this 1/2 and I'm a very, very frugal person... There's no way I'm paying 50 bucks for something and doing less than my best!

So you just have to find what works for you. But I think it will help you if you have other non-weight loss goals. Good luck!