hi everyone,

I just joined, this is my first post. I'm just a bit confused. For my entire life, since I was, even 12, I've thought I was horribly overweight. This has crippled me, I cant go to the beach, I cant swim in a pool etc etc. It's actually caused quite a lot of mental distress, and unfortunately thanks to another mental issue I have, it doubles up. Quite Lethal.

Anyway. I'm a 6 foot guy, 24 years old. I USED to weigh 105kg (230ish pounds). Ironically this was when i was comfortable (I had gained weight to reach 105 over a course of 2 years whilst studying, and, although it was a problem, it wasn't THAT crippling - i still couldn't take my top off at the beach without having a panic attack etc etc). Also at that weight, people really couldn't tell. One time when i was donating blood, I told the lady how much I weighed and she paused and said '.. you don't look it?!'.

I must admit now that I do have a large structure, a very VERY big chest (rib cage), that sticks out like crazy. Gah I hate it. (it means if i lose too much weight, there'll be like this horrible cavity thing, massive mountain of a chest, then a sudden drop to a small stomach.)

sorry, straying off path. Anyway since moving to a new state, I've been a lot more active, and believe it or not I've lost about 20kg. I now weigh 85kg (almost 190 pounds). And sure yeah, it's good. But I still look "fat". Still have the tummy that I absolutely hate.

????

z man,

Glad to see you posting.

It sounds to me as though your view of your body is harsher than it needs to be. Probably other people don't see you the same way at all!

According to BMI, you are "overweight," but your weight would be in the "normal" range if you got to 175 lbs. That's not too far away.

Do you work out? That can do a lot for improving your health as well as appearance.

Remember that you are more than what you see as physical flaws. Things like a large rib cage are just the luck of the draw--nothing can be done about that. If you have a therapist or counselor, maybe talk about your physical issues if you haven't already?

Good luck, z man!

Jay

Hey...just wanted to say welcome! Good job on your weight loss support. Sounds like you need to work on your body image though...try to be more positive and look at your good qualities too! I know that can be hard when you're unhappy with your body (trust me, I know...), but it's worth it just to say something nice about yourself every now and then...it will really start to change your whole outlook eventually.

As far as losing weight and still "looking fat", I can relate and I think exercise is really key with that. When I've lost weight before without exercising, it took longer to notice and be able to see a difference. Now that I am exercising on a regular basis and really doing a lot of strength training, I see the results faster!

Good luck!

Hi there z man, welcome to 3fc It's good to see you here. I hope (but am pretty sure ) you'll join in and get lots of support to help you, perhaps not just with weight loss but also with how you look at yourself. I've been here since July and having the folks here to talk to about things that have happened in real life has helped me so much. So do join in as much as you like.

hey..

thanks so much guys, I really appreciate the replies, it means a lot. And yes, as stated in the first post, my perception of my body, can quite possibly be different than what I actually am. The people around me keep saying I look great, and how I've lost weight...

.. but for some reason my brain just can't register that. It starts to get delusional... you knwo the usual 'they don't see underneath my clothes' 'they're lying' etc etc

as for talking to someone, I have a psychiatrist, but unfortunately they don't really talk to you, they only prescribe medication. So yeah, I probably do need to see someone. Not a day goes by that I don't think of my weight and my image. Literally every single day I think about the "problem".

It's a tough scenario. I think once, although I could be wrong, I lost a LOT of weight, and I was on the LOWER side of average weight. Even then, I hated my body. Shows how deep this runs really.

Z man,

Welcome! I think you have come to the right place. Continue to excercise and everythingelse will fall into place.

Welcome to 3FC! You certainly have picked the right place for support and friends! Your journey sounds like a long one and were all here for your support! Good luck! Continue to eat healthly and work out and (like kaylasmom010 said) things WILL fall into place! KEEP AT IT!

Hey there z man. Nice to meet you. For once in my life I have no advice...lol I'm 44 years old and probably since the time I was in Kindergarten I have thought about my weight/food/body image every single day of my life. If you find the answer, please share with us ASAP, because I have a feeling there are literally millions of us on this grand ol planet who suffer from the same problem.

the answer is Seroquel... a big dose of Seroquel.

hahaha jk :P albeit I take it for specific reasons, and surprisingly it helps

but I don't advise it. But hey, there's more to the story.

My "illness" is Bipolar Disorder, and so it fluctuates.... at times I think I'm horribly overweight and ugly, but other times I think I'm the hottest guy in the world. Doesn't make sense, and it's one **** of a roller coaster, but hey, I'm used to it.

Welcome, z man! You've done great so far.
Oh my. Of course, I'm not a doctor, but my husband has BPD (rapid cycling bipolar 1, to be precise). So, here's my highly untrained but experiential advice (whether you want it or not!).

He does not (make that will not) take medication (I do *not* advise stopping your medication - this leads to bad bad things). He controls his with diet and exercise. There is significant evidence that BPD sufferers have several vitamin deficiencies. Their blood is also, typically, lower in Omega-3 fatty acids (I should not that there is no research to date which shows remedying this problem is beneficial for BPD patients, all evidence is anecdotal). He takes a supplement daily to make up for the deficiencies, and has switched out grains for greens and fish (to replace the Omega-6s with Omega-3s).

He visits the gym for 1.5 hours 3 to 4 times per week. It increases serotonin and endorphins (there's been some research on the effects of exercise on clinical depression patients). It also tires you out, so when you're "riding high" (manic) you simply do not have the energy to bounce off the walls in grandeur.

Finally, it seems to help him to limit his food intake at night and to sleep in a colder, pitch black room, both of which help your body sleep more soundly. He eats before he hits the gym and doesn't eat after that (except for a small bowl of rice, a salad or a piece of cheese, from time to time).

Can I guarantee these will work for you? Not at all. Luckily, there's absolutely no research that says a clean diet and a healthy dose of exercise exacerbates BPD. All evidence points to it having no effect or improving it. On top of that, eating clean and exercising plenty will help with your weight loss goals. I often wonder if our bodies are trying to tell us something when we gain weight. Is it supposed to be the warning bell of a different (more severe) condition (such as BPD)?

Hi

thanks for your response! I have the exact same thing, and I'm exactly the same with the medication... I just... don't want to take it at times, because I think maybe I dont have it, but yeah my fiance cracks onto me and gives it to me. I have to, I've seen what it's like when I'm off it and it's not pretty..

and yeah I do quite a bit of exercise, depending which mood I'm in, but... i don't know if it helps? The medication does a pretty good job.