I've lost 32 lbs. so far. I can't wait for people to start noticing. Every Sunday, I go to church expecting someone to notice and ask if I've lost weight, and every Sunday I am disappointed.

That's so me! Like I feel happy on the INSIDE about the comments, but at the same time, I get so embarrassed and wish they hadn't brought it up. I think it might be that I'm embarrassed because it's bringing attention to the fact that I'm FAT. Yes, I've lost weight, but I'm STILL fat. And it kind of brings attention to that, indirectly, and I think it makes me self-conscious.

DEFINATELY to that last part!!

I think its cos im still not happy with my self, and am still a little overweight, that it feels like i cant hide behind something anymore..that its obvious they ARE looking at me and judging me..and really SEEING what i look like?

I was much more embarrassed by needing to lose weight, by letting the world see just how out of control and irresponsible I was, then by getting compliments after losing that said weight. Much more.

Meg and Taryn, I am right there with both of you! I am really embarrassed by alot of attention surrounding my weight, whether it's good or bad! But each and every compliment and comment is always followed by, "What's your secret?". They then wait expectantly for my answer. When I tell them that I am watching what I eat or calorie counting and lots of exercise, they always respond with a disappointed, "Ooh." It's not what they want to hear.

SkinnyNOTACow, is that you with Ruby in your avatar? I LOVE Ruby!

I was probably down 30 pounds or so before anyone noticed. I just said thanks and that was all. I loved the compliments and it helped to keep me on track. When my weight loss really moved along and I had lost 60 or 70 pounds I honestly tried avoiding certain people because I didn't want to talk about it for some reason. I am also a person that has a hard time with attention being on me. Sometimes now I will be out with a close friend and they will tell some random stranger in our presence how much weight I have lost. I absolutely detest that! I tell them too after I meander my way out of the situation.

I've lost 22lbs and nobody's noticed yet. It might be a good thing (i'm not being bothered) or a bad thing (is it my imagination that I'm losing weight?). I don't know how I'll handle it when people start noticing it but I'll probably say "oh really? maybe a little" like it's no big deal.

OMGosh...HOW I HATE that too! Gurrr. I also have a friend that does that. I think she is really just proud of me, but sometimes I don't know. Funny thing is, we are both married...(for many years), but it's kind of entertaining when "other" men flirt. I guess it's because no man, (except my dear husband) even noticed I existed for many years. Anyway, we were at a ball game the other day and a nice looking guy was casually visiting with us. Neither of us had ever met him as his kid played for the visiting team. My hubby was near by talking with another friend. Anyway, just out of the clear blue she blurts out, "Hey, did you know my friend here has recently lost a ton of weight?" The guy shakes his head and said, "No, this is the first time we've met..." Friend says, "She's lost 170 pounds!!!!!!!" :o

The man quickly ended the conversation. I was as red as a beet and she seemed to look very satisfied. UGH. I asked her why she always does that and she says, "I'm just so proud of you"...but in the back of my mind, I really wonder if she thinks I'm going to start bed jumping or something. She watches a lot of Oprah...LOL :D

I just say, "Yes, thank you for noticing." I find that pretty much ends the conversation, but on a good note.

WHO CARES IF NO ONE HAS NOTICED :shrug:YOU KNOW WHAT YOUR DOING AND WHAT YOU HAVE LOST:bravo: BE PROUD OF YOUR SELF:dance: I'M SURE THE PEOPLE AROUND YOU HAVE NOTICED AND HAS LET YOU KNOW IT :gossip:THAT'S ALL THAT MATTER'S:D YOUR DOING A GREAT JOB:woohoo: KEEP GOING THE COMPLIMENT'S YOU FEEL YOU NEED WILL COME :coach:

:hug:S

The weight loss comments still make me cringe but nothing like they did when they first started. It seems the further I am from my starting weight the easier I can take the comments whether this is because I am getting use to them, that my starting weight is more distanced from me or that I am proving that I can get to my goal or a combination of all these I don't know.

I'm still waiting for someone other than my hubby to notice my weight loss. I keep thinking when I see my mum that she is going to mention it, but she doesn't.

I have a couple of thoughts on this...

First to the OP: I would rehearse a few one liners you can use in this situation and it could even give the person a clue that you get uncomfortable...maybe something like "I've been working on it but I don't like to talk about it" or something more subtle that I can't find in my morning brain. I have to say that I'm an extrovert and that sort of group thing never bothers me so I suspect they are much the same and totally oblivious to making you uncomfortable.

I wanted to say that I think that some of those that love us the most and are closest to us don't say much because it's not important to them. My best friend from 4th grade has always been slender but never seemed to notice that I had lost weight or anything. I don't think it was that she was waiting for me to fall or anything, it's just not something she cares about. She loves me fat or thin and much of my family was the same. I still don't think my brother and his wife have said a word. They might be waiting for me to fail though! LOL

My other experience (I lost weight in 2004 and have gained a small amount back so I'm focused on healthy eating again) is that some people continue to remark about my weight MANY years later after they've seen me many times in those years. I have one out of state aunt and another acquaintance who say something EVERY time. LOL I try to laugh but it makes me feel like people really hold on to the memories of me heavier. I try not to let it bother me though. It's a weird phenomenon though.

Peg

When I was fat & in social situations, I pretended that I didn't have a body -- what I call "living from the neck upwards." Any references to it at all were taboo. I was not what I call a "jolly fat woman" who made self-deprecating jokes about her body. No, for me, it was The Unmentionable, The Thing That Must Not Be Discussed, and I was, myself, the proverbial elephant in the room.

This is why I, too, had a difficult time when people began talking about my weight loss. It took them a long time, actually. I think I must have lost about 40 pounds before anyone said anything. I'm convinced that's because people pick up signals from you when a subject is considered beyond the pale, and they agree tacitly to be silent, too. The people who said things were people who barely knew me, and so weren't part of the polite peoples' agreement that I'd bound everyone to.

I'm such a puritan about compliments even now. I thank the person who gives them to me, but if the conversation continues, I always tell them that the weight loss & maintaining it is a lot of work, that I put a lot of time & effort into it. It's not that I'm fishing for more credit for my steely willpower or persistence or anything. It's that I really want them to know this. I'm trying to dispell any notions of magical thinking. So many of them seem to want me to tell them it was a nonprescription pill or the ultimate foolproof diet or a little device you order off an infomercial & use just 15 minutes a day.

Perhaps when someone comments that you've lost weight, it is still a negative because it means that you must have been heavy to begin with. But, you can't expect your friends to anticipate your feelings on this topic. They are well intended complements. One of my most rewarding feelings during my weight loss is when the first person tells me that they believe I've lost weight.