As much as I tried to fight it, I just knew it would happen. The day I started going back to my old ways. I don't want to be that statistic though, I can't be. I can't be the one who loses all this weight, and then just gains it all back.
I don't know what went wrong, or when it went wrong. But I can see myself getting back to my old ways. I pig out on strange foods. It's not the chips and cookies anymore. It's the whole grain cereal, the grapes and the carrots with dip.
I have gotten so comfortable at 180, while I know I am no where near goal, I just dont know what happened. Where I started to lose the motivation. I think that because it was so easy for me to go from 274 to 180 (I dont know why, but it was very easy for me), I am now getting frustrated that it is not just falling off like it used to. I have this sort of "well I'm not losing, I might as well eat" mindset.
I just don't know what to do. I dont know how to explain what I am going through now. It's like I dont know how to continue on. I never sort of tracked calories or anything, I just sort of ate in moderation and healthy foods. So I cant start to count calories, because I dont know how much is or is not ok to eat. I am horribly scared of gaining weight. I was 177 and already got up to 180 over the past few weeks. It's just horrible. This feeling is horrible.
I dont know where I am going with this sulk fest lol. I just feel lost.
I decided to put my start current and goal weight as what I am right now. The "big goal" scared me. The fact that I have lost 90lb and was so close to losing 100, scared the crap out of me. It put on too much pressure to get there. I want to take tomorrow as a fresh start.
You caught it b4,it got too out of hand.You are aware that your eating is out if control.Maybe if you exercise it will compensate for the extra calories.
Just a thought
Good Luck Tracy
Take tomorrow as a fresh start. Sounds like a great idea. And you have lost alot of weight. Which is why you are probably in an emotional plateau...you know, when you've worked so hard and when you've had alot of progress and where you are now isn't so bad because it is so much better than where you were, and you're tired...
You MAY benefit at this point from a more structured plan, because IMHO as the weight comes of, it becomes harder to TAKE off, and those 3 lb loss weeks are few and far between. And for me, an intuitive eating plan doesn't work because my calorie tolerance levels between loss and maintenance and gain are SO. TIGHT. I do WW because it takes the pressure and the obsession OFF of the food, believe it or not! I know if I stick to the plan, and eat what I want and account for it, I'll be fine. So I don't worry anymore.;
I seriously, seriously recommend a plan like WW. You don't have to calculate calories and your basic metabolic rate and track serious numbers. You just have a daily limit and you can spend it any way you want to. Today, I had spaghetti and meatballs and a piece of homemade WW recipe cheesecake for dinner. Deprivation? Not me!!!
It sounds like time for a switchup, and I really think looking into a structured plan might be beneficial. That and taking the pressure off about the timeline and the goal and all that jazz. Focus on a structured eating plan and your exercise. Do a new activity, to make the link between your new body and your mind. Relax, have some fun, and the weight WILL take care of itself.
It might be time to do something more formal, just to help you not to lose any more momentum.
Have you tried checking out websites like FitDay or The Daily Plate? And there are others as well. They make tracking calories really easy! The foods and their values are already in there, for the most part. They also help you figure out a calorie target. I use FitDay myself.
Weight Watchers is another good plan, as kiramira said.
Well done on your weight loss to date. You have done really well. As for the blasted plateau, it does happen. Your body has to get used to the new you. Please put the brake on now - you've worked too hard, even if you think it was easy. You must also remember that you've just come out of Winter and you do tend to put on a bit of weight because of the cold and eating warming foods. Your Summer is here now, so you might get fresh motivation from that.
With only fifty odd pounds to go, a more structured approach may be a good solution. Or maybe even a chat with your Doctor or a Dietitian to get you back on track. I went from 130kg to 80kg and did it easily. I counted calories, watched fat intake and walked like crazy. I walked everywhere. I was starting to look and feel great. However instead of sticking with it, I met a lovely man and I became just too content in my new comfort zone. Needless to say, my weight progressively went up to 144kg (yes about 315lb from 176lb or so). Please don't let this happen to you. You have gained too much losing the weight - nicer more comfortable clothes, being able to move more freely, better health the list is endless.
Look after your self. Maybe a Be Nice to Me day is what you need. Really pamper yourself. Buy a new outfit which you REALLY like and you know won't fit you if you gain weight or just have a relaxing day doing things you like. Then get back to it. Renew your motivation. Set a new easy REACHABLE goal with a calorie/fat free reward once you've reached - maybe a mere 5lb. That's doable!
I am starting again. This time, I will succeed and maintain. Step by step!!!
Before, I also don pay attention to the contents of what I'm eating. But since my father suffered from stroke. I became really really cautious on what I eat. We have history of diabetes and I don't want to suffer they way my father have suffered.
I think sometimes we just need a brake. You've lost 95 lbs so far, that's amazing!
You gained 3 lbs over the past few weeks... that isn't horrible. Not horrible at all. Some people fluctuate 1-3 lbs every week. Maybe you should up your exercise, or change your setting.
losing 90 lbs is amazing, congratulations! maybe part of it is letting your head catch up with what you've done. you've obviously changed a lot of habits, and it has to make a difference that the foods you're choosing to overindulge in aren't the empty cal, high fat, junky foods, though I know I feel really stressed out when I feel out of control of my eating.
You've come so far already. Maybe it's worth taking a little break and try to maintain at 180 for couple of months. It may take some pressure off of you in thinking that you constantly have to lose. Alternative to not losing weight is not going all out and gaining it all back--there is an in-between point.
Good advice from KDuffer above. Take a deep breath, and be calm. Everything is going to be ok. Don't look back right now if its too overwhelming. Just be in the here and now. You weigh 180 at this point, so maintain for a few weeks, while you are researching a plan you can stick with. Once, you have figured that out, then go from here. You can do it.
I can totally relate! I went back to my old ways one too many times. Fortunately I was blessed not to have gained back as much as I dreaded. This time I'm cutting the string to the yo-yo! Getting back to this site as well as other life adjustments are what's going to make my weight loss journey successful.
You've made the first step to recovery by posting here. This is truly a place to slap us all back into reality.
I wish you the best of luck!
Last edited by SunshineCA; 06-10-2009 at 12:57 PM.
Getting back to my old ways...
Tracy
