i posted earlier about being really upset about not losing weight despite working out and cleaning up my diet.. well I followed the advice and tried to up my calories, and now I've actually just gained weight and feel fatter than ever. I binged for the past two nights.. I guess I'm just looking for support from people who have been through this. I want to lose at least 25 pounds before I go back to school , but that's in 2 and a half months and with the way things are going I'm scared that that's not going to be enough time.

I'm sorry, I really, really sympathize.

I can't remember, if I ever knew, how you're tackling your weightloss journey - do you want to post it again, both before you upped the calories and after, and see if you get more advice?

My only advice is, don't panic: there is a way to do this but sometimes it takes a while to work out our own particular way.

I know for me, consistent, steady, permanent weight loss could not occur until my desire to be thin outweighed and overpowered the desire for the food. Period. In other words, I *finally* wanted to be thin so badly, that I was ready to pass up on "those" foods and "that unhealthy eating" and switch over to a healthy lifestyle.

That being said, what do you think set you off on that binge? Did you not plan properly? Did you not have delicious, tasty, healthy meals/snacks on hand - ready to eat 24/7? Did you allow yourself to get too hungry? Was there junk readily available to you?

What kind of plan are you following and what kind of commitment have you made to get to your goals? Do you perhaps have to find a new plan and a way to make it work better for you. Do you need to re-commit and make that commitment ironclad? These things are all doable. With a bit of tweaking here and there & some soul searching, losing weight is yours for the taking.

In addition to all the FANTASTIC stuff Robin said, if the goal you've set (trying to lose 25 before you go back to school) is causing you a great deal of stress, I would change your mindset and think of this one day at a time. For me, stress always triggered binges! So instead, mentally celebrate each day that you lived a healthy lifestyle as if you'd just won a war (you HAVE!). The weight WILL come off (and stay off) if you make permanent changes that you can live with. And that is what is REALLY important, your long-term success, not the line you've drawn in the sand regarding returning to school.

One day at time can help you focus on what you can do today to make yourself healthier and happier. Worry about tomorrow when it gets here.

I don't think anyone else here has said this yet, but my opinion is that you have set the bar WAY too high and it is a recipe for disaster.

The bad news is that trying to lose 25 lbs in 2.5 months would mean losing on average 2.5 lbs per week. SOME people have been able to drop 5-6 lbs in one week, but that is not the norm. Most of us lose at a pace of even .5 to sometimes 2 lbs a week and some weeks, nothing at all.

Now for the good news...you CAN lose some weight before school begins, but you are going to have to carefully map out a plan. You may not reach your "goal" weight by then, but EVERY SINGLE POUND lost will bring you that much closer to your goal.

I am sorry that you binged. I have also done that in the past. Like, I would think to myself, WHAT am I doing this for? Here I am, restricting this and that, spending upwards of 7 hours on a treadmill or stationary bike, counting calories, Suzy ate such and such and she is so skinny; why can't I have that? And on and on. Not even paying attention to the fact that I had either taken the appropriate steps to lose weight OR even lost some weight already; it didn't matter. It wasn't going fast enough for me and I was stressed out and gave up.

You've probably heard the saying "you can't see the forest for the trees"...in weight loss, it seems we focus TOO much on the "forest" or goal, that we don't even see all the little "trees" or pounds/milestones/achievements along the way. These achievements can come in the form of beginning to exercise and sticking with it. Or paying more attention to the foods you are eating.

I think from what you posted, you sound like you set a goal with a time-frame that you understand is probably too stringent and so you will "fail". If that is what you are thinking, look at what you CAN change about this scenario. Do you need to change your goal? I don't think so. There are people on here who have lost couple hundred pounds, so we know 25 is an acceptable goal. Can you change your time-frame in which to do accomplish this with less stress? Absolutely.

A lot of us here use food to cope with stress and anger so it is important to find healthy ways to release it. It will take some time to reprogram some of your habits. Sometimes it helps to think, what if one of the ladies here was facing whatever problem I was facing at the time? What kind of constructive advice could I give them to get them back on track? And take your own advice. Would you tell her "Hey, you binged. You may as well give up now because you are failing". No, those are only things we tell ourselves out of disgust, humiliation, self-hatred and so on. So again, ponder what you might tell someone else in this situation to give them support and take it.

You CAN do this!

^What they all said.

But also, I was in the same boat as you until very recently. I thought I HAD to be at a certain weight by a certain date, and the more I stressed about it, the less I actually worked at doing it.

Finally I got mad and sat down one night to re-prioritize my life. I picked a couple things I wanted to focus on (one of them being getting fit) and got rid of some unnecessary distractions (for example, I quit a club I had joined, I stopped visiting a few time-wasting websites, I hired someone to mow the lawn, etc.).

Then I started acting as if I were already at my goal weight. I think of myself now as a fit and healthy person. Then, when I see a commercial for Taco Bell or see a candy bar while I'm in line at Target, I say to myself, "I'm a fit and healthy person, so I don't eat that stuff anymore". I guess it's a form of visualization, but it really helps me.

Also, take a look at the Goal threads here. They really inspire me when I feel my energy wane.

Good luck and keep your chin up! You can do it!

I did something very similar. I told myself, "I just don't do that anymore". I would see or want something that I "wanted", though I knew it wasn't beneficial to my long term health & well-being, and tell myself, "I just don't do that anymore". "I just don't do that anymore". "I no longer eat like that". I told myself that time and time again. And it got me through. And then of course - it really CAME true.

Beautiful advice from RR overhead. I also agree with Pas. I started treating myself as I would someone I dearly loved. I just started being kind to myself and being supportive of my own goals. This included driving past drive-thrus and making myself something beautiful and nutritious on a clean plate in my clean kitchen and sitting down properly to eat it.

The advice given here to avoid another binge is very good advice. And I will tell you that yes you can lose 2.5 lbs a week!! (But please don't give up if you have weeks where you lose less--okay? just keep going! any weight loss is better than none) But for any weightloss at all you do have to PLAN and commit. First plan strategies for how to avoid another binge, and secondly plan how you think you would most comfortably start to lose the weight and stick to it. Start journaling or keeping a blog if you don't have one!

I remember reading your earlier post and a lot of people advised you to eat more. I think you said you were eating 1300/1400 cals a day? Well I think doing a revolving calorie schedule would work best for you based on my experience. (So I am not speaking for anyone else I just giving you my opinion based on my weightloss results)... Whats worked for me in the past and its currently pretty much what I've been doing is caloric rotations. Have high days, average days and low cal days. I think its good for your metabolism. It doesn't plummet b/c you are starving every day and the high days give you a boost to keep it going. Pick three numbers that you think you should use for your rotations and maybe do a High, Average, Low, Average, High, Average, Low...type of cycle. If you feel like your high days are to many calories just excersize more on that day to make you feel better =) And never deprive yourself of any food. If you want ice cream calmly go to the freezer with a spoon allow yourself 2 or 3 spoonfuls and put it back. Drink a glass of water. lol. That tends to help me with cravings and not binging on the whole damn thing! =) Hope my advice helps!

Hi

Sorry you're feeling frustrated. I can certainly feel your pain. I can only share with you whats going on with me right now and maybe there is something you can take from it.

It took me a long time to get to where I'm at. When I was at my HW in 2003 I had quit going out in public unless I was pretty sure I wouldn't see anyone I knew.

Today, I went on a rafting trip and wore shorts...and felt comfortable...mostly....actually I had several minutes where I felt impatient. I wish I could lose my weight faster...I wish...I wish...Everyone ate their pie at the BBQ and I watched....because I absolutely know that that pie takes me further from my goal timewise.

I will probably attain my goal, but will it be in 1 year or 5. That is up to me.

I have bounced around the forums reading and writing today....Why.....so I don't binge. The urge is very strong.

What happens in 2 1/2 months has to do with how your body wants to respond to weight loss, AND what you do to participate in that which is what you put in your mouth and how much you move.

I'm speaking for myself, but I think I can neutralize a whole week of healthy decisions in 1 afternoon. Today, so far, I haven't done that.

What I am sure of, is if you eat and exercise sensibly, and find a way to get through those moments where temptation is strong, that you WILL be in a better position than you are today. You will feel better, you will look better.

I also know the other side of the coin. I gained 20 of my previously preciously lost pounds this winter....6 to go and I will start again where I left off last fall. I will stay OP today.

Best wishes! HANG IN THERE!! The good news is that there are great people to support us on our journey.

hey maybe before when you weren't "losing" you were gaining muscle and losing fat... but your weight was staying the same. take some measurements and then go back to what you were doing before, forget about the binges and just start moving forward. then wait 3-4 weeks before you measure again. I bet you'll see some changes then even if the scale doesn't move. Just stick with it because eventually you'll start to shed more of the fat when you're body has built up enough muscle. just my thoughts at least.

Lots of good advice. Let me add two very important words: FOOD DIARY! I don't know if you keep one now, but I find it to be an invaluable tool or I will just mindlessly eat and "think" I did "ok," or that I stayed within my calorie budget.