I don't use it as an excuse to over eat. I do see a lot of people with the guilt posts tho and sometimes it does feel like they are asking for an excuse for the binge instead of encouragement as if someone sympathizing that they too binge when stressed, depressed, or bored will take away all of those calories and the guilt. It really depends on the person but I do feel the sense of "enabling" sometimes. Let's face it, we wouldn't tell our alcoholic friend "that's OK" if they went on a bender would we? We'd tell them to get back to AA or their plan or sponsor, whatever has kept them from this behavior.

Here's where I turn into a softy about it...Sometimes people are looking for some sort of validation of self-worth b/c the binge has left them feeling worthless. I do sympathize but no one can give them that, it has to come from within. I sometimes struggle with that so I understand it but all I can really do is refer them to a counselor or even OA. Deep down, it's not about a person telling them via internet they are full of worth, it's about them telling THEMSELVES "I am full of worth, even when I make not-so-great choices!"

For some people, food is a drug. To say, "it's okay, move on tomorrow" might not work for some people - people with food addiction. You wouldn't say that to an alcoholic or drug addict who relapsed.

So if that's the perspective you are coming from Lori Bell then yes, the 'binge porn' or encouragement for those who don't come from a food addiction perspective can be quite triggering.

Hugs!

The journey never ends!

Isn't that just an excuse to put blame on others for things you have to deal with yourself?

I don't want to sound mean and honestly try to help by pointing this out.

People do NOT enable you to eat if they are nice or "forgiving". It is you who takes this treatment as an OK to eat, not other people's intentions.
People can write/eat/say what they want. You take care of what is going into your mouth! This is why thin people that never were heavy are that way.

So what that my mother and boyfriend are obese? I am an adult, my hands and brain are healthy and what comes into my mouth goes there because of me. I CAN deal with this and so can you We are our ONLY true enablers.

So true. Some struggle more with their relationship with food than others. It's not easy to find what will un-complicate things for you. Food being a necessity, it's just something you have to keep working towards.

Will the awareness of this tendency to use these posts as an excuse for bingeing put a halt to the behavior? Good might be able to come from this.

I ignore the "patting each other on the back" posts. I like to read the threads about binging...including those about how much they ate, what they ate, their self-hatred, etc. It does not make me want to binge. Quite the opposite. It makes me think, "I never want to experience that train of thought again." But i like to read it to learn more about the psychology of binging. Because i can't figure out how to stop it. I mean there are many little things i am doing...but i cannot figure out how to cure it.

People tend to report posts that don't say "It's ok ".

Wow, I've never thought of it this way before. I am from the former school of "fall off the wagon once and it's time to quit." So, I see the encouraging posts to get back up and brush it off very, very encouraging.

It may not be for everyone, but I find during times of self-loathing for any reason, it is no good (for me) to be cut down or admonished. It does me good to hear encouragement.

To each his own!

Old post! We know Lori figured it out - she's a stellar example of gettin' 'er done, and she's still cruising! And still providing reminders that it's important to figure out the root cause of the, ahem, indiscretions and SOLVING it so that it doesn't happen again. There isn't any point in causing grave misery over a mistake/flub/weakness ... but that sort of behavior doesn't work, doesn't get us closer to our goals, and doesn't even feel good for more than a minute. Get to the bottom of it, and figure out why it happens, and make a change so that set of circumstances can't come up again. "Doing the same thing over and over again and expecting a different result is the definition of insanity." Hopefully Lori will or did chime in on this again, several years later!

WOW! Holy old post Batman! Good observation! Hopefully Lori won't mind us still yapping on about it.

On the bright side, maybe someone who hasn't been here long or seen it before needed to see this...

Like a blast from the past...lol

As ICU pointed out, this post is 2 years and 2 months old.

I did figure it out, and reached goal, and have been there for 21 months, though to be honest, it still drives me nuts when people pat each other on the back for a good binge...lol. But hey, I realized over time that some people like that reassurance. Not me though, I still like a good stiff kick in the pants. Keeps me slim and trim.

Hah I just realized this now. Eek!

I do not like being screamed at, getting a figurative slap in the face or being told I'm a bad person, or that I'm failing because I went off the deep end once or twice. I've done that to myself in the past, and I was more apt to fail! When I say to myself, "Well, you screwed up-but you know what? Right now I can pick myself up and start again!" One cookie doesn't mean you're beyond repair, and neither does 1500 cals worth of candy. It's a momentary lapse of judgement, so I am not going to come on here and say something like, "You've failed! What's wrong with you!" The only person who can give one proper motivation is themselves. We all come to 3fc as a suppliment, but we wouldn't even be here if it weren't for those awesome people we are. We obviously care enough to at least do that, right? So, I know everyone has already beaten themselves up enough after a binge. I'm not going to be fuel to the fire of self hatred. Being a supportive person is not enabling. Is it really the end of the world if you do binge? Absolutely not. Nobody is perfect, and I am no different. Progress is progress and transgressions happen. I didn't realize this post was that old, also, but my opinion still stands.

My mother being the "voice of reason" and yelling at me every time i ate "bad" food was how i got to where i am today with my binging problem.

Yeah, I noticed it was an old post, but I still thought it was relevant!

Looks like it b/c the posts are still rolling in. The OP is past this stage but I am sure there are a lot of people who are coming into this phase as well. Just another reason our Maintainers are so encouraging and inspirational.