I know exactly how you feel, Barbie. I'm in the same situation...I used to love doing my hair and make-up and picking out just the right outfit for the day. Now, not so much. I'm lucky if I have the energy to do my make-up and I almost never do anything with my hair anymore, I wear it in a ponytail every day.

It's not even really so much about having the energy to do it. It's about what you talked about, feeling so depressed that it doesn't matter anymore. And, not wanting to draw attention. It's easy to say "just start doing your make-up every morning and you'll snap out of it," and that should help some to get you back on track. But, I'm failing at this every day. I'm trying because I'm in the same situation, but I'm not doing it. So, all I can say is that I feel for where you're coming from. :hug:

Ugh, Barbie :( I have dysmorphia so I know how you feel! I go through this everyday to the point where most of the time I can barely function or leave the house. I hope you feel better soon. We're all a work in progress, no one is perfect but you are beautiful! I hope you feel better soon and if you ever want to chat you're welcome to message me on here

I feel the same way...and I really probably do come off obnoxious which makes me even more insecure...:(

I have had non existant self esteem most of my life. I bookmarked this 3fc thread awhile ago to go back to when I start feeling disgusted with myself. Check it out sometime; http://www.3fatchicks.com/forum/showthread.php?t=134022

I'm the same way. I used to dance, do splits, play sports, and now I've got this barrel for a body and the "So, when are you due?" belly that's not even remotely linked to pregnancy.

But I also know that if I get caught up in a cycle of self-pity over how I look, I'll get lazy, sleep more so I can live in dreams, eat bad food because there's not enough time to make anything good, and the situation won't get fixed.

I find that success is the best motivator at times like this - looking at pictures of me at my highest weight and realizing I don't look like that anymore, putting the jeans that I wore last February into the dryer because I know they'll still fit when I take them out, and thinking about my future successes. I like to walk around cute boutique stores in the mall, look at the clothes in size 6 and decide what I'm going to buy when I hit my goal.

It's just important to keep your mind as disciplined as your eating and your exercise schedule because if that goes, so will your weight loss efforts.

Don't just love yourself when you're skinny - love yourself through the whole journey and then when you're there, you'll be proud of yourself for sticking with you the whole time. There's a whole world out there who will want to be your friend when you're one of the "beautiful people" so treasure the ones who are with you every step of the way - and definitely don't be a fair-weather friend to YOURSELF.

:hug: to everyone that posted. The difference between those BBWs and you isn't physical - it is mental. How you see yourself IS the secret. Confidence and self esteem shine through. When your eyes sparkle and you strut your stuff - your personality shows through. Beauty IS in the eye of the beholder.

You really do need to love yourself NOW! Start by listing all of the things you do love about your body (what it can do, your favorite things about it, etc.) Post that list and every time you have a negative thought about how you look, stop - replace that mental image with a positive one.

As others have said, this journey is hard enough - you have to value yourself, and give priority to yourself, and realize that you ARE BEAUTIFUL NOW!

Everyone here has great advise! And there are times when i feel that way too. I dont think i am a really ugly girl, but if i spend time on myself like do my hair, or my makeup, i feel much better about myself. I feel taken care of even though i weigh more than i'd like too. And i am 14 pounds down from a month ago, so i feel estatic!! We are all here for one reason or another!:hug:

You know what I loved about all these replies. Is that others feel the same way and know what I'm going through! and it really helps me for some reason. The advice is nice too but when you have someone who totally knows what you're talking about makes me feel %100 better. Thanks guys I don't feel ugly today! And thanks Nixie for getting me.

I know how you feel Barbie.

Even when I was much smaller than I am now, I was very self-conscious and I've always struggled to understand how anyone could possibly like me, let alone love me, even obvious people like my family or boyfriends.

I don't have any helpful advice or suggestions I'm afraid. The worst thing for me is when I spent hours carefully doing my hair and applying makeup and trying to make myself look beautiful for a night out, and the pictures come back the next day and I just look AWFUL. I really wonder, what's the point?

The only thing I can say is, if you don't like something, change it! I know that's what we're all trying to do, but keep at it, I'm sure your confidence will increase as you continue along your journey.

;)

I know what you mean. I feel like as I've been losing weight, I've been feeling uglier. I think it's partially my own natural dislike for myself being reflected on something new besides my weight (because I've always measured my failure and self worth by my weight).