You know, I was doing really well and then today went back to work (teacher work day - no school for the kids) and everyone brought in breakfast food.

So instead of me exerting anything that even remotely resembled willpower, I caved and pigged out. I didn't eat a huge quantity, but I *knew* that what I was eating was loaded with calories, fat and carbs.. and I just sat there and ate it. Afterwards, I felt the incredible guilt and disappointment with myself that I couldn't even make it through one social gathering and not blow it.

I know I should dust myself off and try again, but I'm really starting to wonder about my will to do this? I mean... I want to do this, but can I stop being a food pushover long enough and if I do succeed, how long will I continue to be successful maintaining if I don't learn some willpower??

I feel like I should have 'been better' because I'm only 4 days in on my counting calories/working out/lifestyle changing eating habits... I would almost be forgiving of myself had I been 'good' for weeks.. but four days? Man, I suck!

I was listening to Jillian Michaels two Sunday's ago. She basically said, and I'm summarizing here, that no one is "on plan" for days and then is a "failure" because of one moment. Or, to put it another way, you may have made some bad choices for 15 minutes. But your 4 days worth of on plan eating is 5760 minutes of GOOD choices. Which one carries more weight?

The difference between someone who makes it to goal and someone who doesn't is NOT that the ones who make it never go off plan...it's that the ones who make it forgive themselves and get right back ON plan after a slip. Those who STAY off plan, who let one less-ideal choice turn into a freefall, don't succeed. But NO ONE succeeds in staying on-plan 100% of the time. Not nobody, not no-how.

So it is your choice...let those 15 minutes of less-than-perfect eating distract you, derail you, and lead you into another 50,000 minutes of inaction, or move on, get back on plan, and move forward. To use another Jillian-ism...you have a flat tire. You have a choice...you can slash the other three tires, or you can pull over, fix the tire, and keep going. I know which one I'd pick.

Stick around here. You can do this.

Time to pick yourself up, dust up, and keep doing what DOES make you feel good, and that's taking care of yourself. It's normal to have moments of weakness, it's what happens after them that separates the people who lose and maintain from the ones who gain back what they have lost + a few more pounds.

Hey I'm a four year maintainer (well, in one month) and I'm going to tell you one of the biggest, most important things I learned on this journey.

There is no blowing it. Blowing it is quitting, stopping and going back to your old lifestyle. Eating something you didn't plan? That happens to ALL of us. Even amazing people like Rockinrobin (sorry Robin! hee) eat stuff they didn't plan or too much of stuff they did plan.

My rule - life is messy, life is complicated. Food is love, food is social occasions. Sometimes, I'm going to eat stuff I didn't plan to eat. My rule is to get RIGHT BACK on track at the next eating opportunity.

I don't let an offplan meal to turn into an offplan day or an offplan weekend or week or month or year.

It won't hurt to analyze why you ate the breakfast foods. Did you not have a yummy, healthy treat at your fingertips (fresh cherries might have given you some ammunition to fight those cravings). Were you too hungry? Were you too deprived? I'm going to be honest with you - after 4 years social occasions are STILL my absolute weakness. But you know, I didn't get to be a heavy person by eating a couple of unplanned muffins. I was a heavy person because I ate too many calories EVERY day for years.

Forgive yourself, keep going.

You do not suck! The first week is harder than "weeks" into your plan. Your body is going to rebel to the change in your eating...just show it who is boss and get back on track. Recognize that you may feel some cravings after eating some stuff that was Off Plan, but that will pass as you start eating clean again. Besides, you are getting back into your regular life after vacation, and so falling into old patterns in that type of situation is easy to do. Don't be so hard on yourself...you have been "good" for 4 days with one slip...that is probably better than you were doing before you decided to make the changes in your life. Really, guilt is absolutely NOT helpful to this process...we all feel it sometimes, but it only brings negative emotions and loss of self-worth, etc. You are human...not a robot. Think of it this way...you ate incredibly well for four days and ONLY ate junk one time...Good Job!

So up you get, dust yourself off, and keep going! You can do this.

Fear not, fair one! Right now you may feel weak, but as time goes on, you'll learn strategies for getting through things like that. You'll learn what to choose and how much of it to take to minimize the damage. Don't give up!

Jay

Everyone has already given great advice and motivation, so I don't have much to add except to say don't give up! A moment of weakness is normal and okay! And it really does get easier to say "no" to temptations after weeks...it's hardest in the beginning. Don't use it as an excuse to jump off the wagon. Remember: you deserve better. Get back on track and lose those pounds!

I don't think there is one of us here who hasn't had this issue and felt the same way you are feeling. You are not a bad person because you had a slip up or because that slip up is early in the game.

If someone you loved was feeling this way, what would you tell them? Think about that and then tell YOURSELF that, because you are worthy of that same love.

I KNOW you can do this. Don't give up. Just get back up and try again..try for a minute, then try for an hour, then a day..and keep doing it until you get to where you want to be.

See what a great place this is? Look at all of the support you have here!

How many decisions do you make in a day? So you made one that wasn't 100% what you planned. What now? Wallowing in self-loathing is not an option-- move on and make your million choices tomorrow!

The difference between those who succeed and those who fail is NOT that the people who succeed never went off plan, but that WHEN they did, they got back up.

I've been a teacher for years, and I do believe a school is a really hard place to lose weight! We do love to eat, huh?? Everyone here has given you good, good advice and encouragement, so let me just say, "Keep on keepin' on!" Every good choice is a victory over a bad choice! Just keep doing the next right thing!

well said!! i had a cheeseburger and fries for dinner tonight (because my psychologist told me that i need to learn how to LIVE and not freak out about every single calorie in my life), and i enjoyed it immensely. my goal was to feel satisfied and happy afterwards, not guilty and sad. i achieved that goal, and tomorrow i plan on eating a humongous salad for dinner.

we are all here for you! lean on us if you need to.

Losing weight (and maintaining) are a bit like learning a foreign language. At first you only know a few words and you aren't so good at it, but with practice you get better and better and before you know it you can talk to native speakers.

Look at this as a learning experience. There is no such thing as failure if you learn from experiences like this. I agree with the other posters who've said that you are only a failure if you quit.

Like anything else, weight loss and maintaining a healthy lifestyle take practice. So, forgive yourself and move on. You can do this!

Ahh.. you guys are great! I was (and I'm still a little) pissed at myself for not saying, "It looks delicious, but no thanks ". I know myself well enough to know that if I avoid temptation, I'm fine.. I give in and then it's like I fling myself toward it with reckless abandon.

Example: "Would you like one of these pieces of cheesecake?"
Me: "No, I really shouldn't.. but thanks anyway!"

If I give in, it'd go like this:

"Would you like one of these pieces of cheesecake?"
Me: "Why yes! Yes I would!" *gobble gobble gobble*.... three pieces of cheesecake later....



Of course I ate back on track for dinner, but I was feeling guilty as anything that I'd screwed up. And in my heart I know to get up, dust yourself off and move on with it.. but I still have that 'man you messed up' feeling. I suppose that tomorrow is another day and I will continue on looking forward - I just hope that I can exercise my willpower a little bit better and learn from this.

Thanks every one of you for being understanding, supportive and telling it like it is. I really appreciate that.

Don't let it get you down! Don't think you always have to be perfect. Plan for these instances. You'll do great!