kind of dumb question..

  • How do you set a goal(s)? I have never really set any, much less realistic ones. I need easy but specific and detailed because I am a detail orientated person but I need things explained. My favorite tool in school was the bubble that you start with the general idea, like the goal, then branch out from that with ideas on how to get to that goal. I just can't figure out my goals . Some info on me.. I am a night binge eater. I can't sleep and thus wake up late in the afternoon. I am a walking zombie, most people call it lazy, but I am on meds that do make me like a walking zombie which on top of the lack of sleep make me hard to work with and make me feel bad for making other people think I am lazy. So, now that you all know my general life story lol, can anyone help me with how you come up with your goals and how you go about completing them> Any motivation techniques? Thanks!!
  • If I were in your shoes, my first goal would be learning to love myself. Then to find a good doctor that really wants to help resolve any issues and wean me off all those meds. It sounds like you're living your life in a fog.

    I've read your 3 posts, and can see why maybe people are a little hesitant to answer. It's difficult to tell if your depression is a symptom of your weight, or your weight is a symptom of your depression, or if both are a symptom of some other issue. I'd dedicate the first big bubble to finding out what the root issue is. Everyone has root issues. Everyone. It's important to acknowledge them and learn to overcome them. When you can do that a host of symptom issues will resolve themselves.

    Love & Light
    Jeannie
  • Hey!

    OK, some thoughts about goals. Especially where weight loss is concerned, it's important not to think of goals in terms of failure. The reason is that it's easy to say "I will weigh 140 pounds by this date," but there are many, many factors that can't be controlled. The danger is that on "X" date one might weight 143 pounds and ... of all things ... feel like a failure! Which is really unnecessary.

    So, I think of a goal as something that points me in a direction--something I'm aiming for. Not as something cast in stone.

    And, it's often easier to break this big overall goal--whether it's a weight and date, or "I will lose 20 pounds," or whatever, into smaller goals. For example: Figuring out what weight loss program you want to try.

    Some programs fit an individual better than another. You could try--Weight Watchers. TOPS. South Beach. Calorie counting. There are tons of programs to consider! Most of these programs include setting targets--like points, or calorie level, or types of foods eaten.

    By then you'd be ready to break it down into daily actions you'll take. This might be--shopping for the foods you'll need. Listing a goal for exercise. Maybe listing meal plans and snack plans.

    And after that, it's Just Do It.

    Does that give you some ideas? Do you have more specific questions?

    I would suggest you talk to your doctor about your sleep problems. It could be that your medication needs adjusting. In any case, lack of sleep doesn't help anyone.

    Good luck!

    Jay
  • Goal setting might sound daunting, but it's actually not that bad when you break it down. Imagine it like a road trip. You have to figure out where your destination is going to be. Do you want to go to Orlando? Cleveland? San Francisco? Only you can decide where you want to go. Once you've decided, you come up with a road map. What roads are going to get you there? What roads should you avoid?

    Goals don't have to be big either! In fact, it's much more satisfying to pick small, achievable goals. If you say, "I want to lose 100 lbs" -- that's a pretty scary goal to tackle. But what if you just say "I want to exercise 15 minutes every day for a month". Not as scary, right? And you pick some very specific action steps to make sure you accomplish that goal, for example: Laying out your work out clothes the night before, getting a gym membership, setting reminders in your email, putting a sticker on a calendar for each day you exercise, etc.

    When you finish each small goal, come up with a new one. Maybe your next goal is to exercise 20 minutes a day for the following month. It's all about baby steps, organizing, and having an action plan.

    Best of luck to you!
  • Great advice all around!

    If you enjoy a big goal with many mini-goals and lots of detail then there's nothing better than weight loss & being healthier IMO.

    Looks like your overall weight loss goal is to lose 35 pounds. (Or about.) That's a good start to have in your head. So, what are some things that will help you to achieve that goal?

    - Having a food plan. (There are programs that many people follow in Diet Central if you need some ideas.)

    - Have an activity plan. (There's an Exercise area that may be good to check out.)

    - Select mini-goals for weight loss. (Not necessary with any time frame attached.)

    - Once you've decided on a food plan or activity plan, break them out into mini-goals as well. Such as making sure to drink all your water today, or making sure to take a walk after lunch.

    Lots of detail in that! Making sure most of our meals are healthy & plan can take a lot of work.

    I would recommend that you talk to your doctor about your medication. It may need adjusting. In the meantime, you may have to think of the night time as your normal awake time, and plan out the evening as you would a normal day. It may help to lessen the binging.

    Just always remember that this is possible! You can do this!
  • I actually don't think that's a dumb question at all!! Weight loss can be daunting, especially if you don't know how to start. While your overall BIG goal might be "lose x pounds and keep it off" you can see from the other pots there's lots and lots of mini goals along the way, from things you do daily (eating all your fruits and veggies, or exercising), to milestones to check off.

    But there are also obstacles to be overcome as well, and it sounds like you have some of those too. It may be helpful as you start to take steps toward weight loss to figure the obstacles as well. A visit to the doctor might well be in order...

    As for motivation techniques, for me the biggest motivation has been my health. But then, I started off with a lot more to lose and with my health and mobility at risk.

    The problem with motivation is that it flags over time. When you get to that point, commitment seems to help...