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-   -   Support Needed!!! (https://www.3fatchicks.com/forum/weight-loss-support/140508-support-needed.html)

ladybugnessa 04-23-2008 08:40 PM

AH--the psychologist in me alerts... (i do have a degree in psych I am not in practice)...

MOM gets thin
MOM gets attractive
MOM gets a new man
MOM is now a WOMAN without DAD
SON can not deal with that emotionally maybe on a very subconscious level.

he's saying what he's saying because in his mind if you stay the way you are maybe you and dad can get back together... it's a subconscious thing totally. he may know you are not going to get back together. he may even know that you being apart is BETTER for you but in subconscious he wants mommy and daddy to be a couple.... even a an adult.

retiredone 04-23-2008 10:40 PM

And of course there is a certain amount of comfort in mom always looking the same. Just tell him you'll always be dear old mom but you'll be "HOT" dear old mom! Sons don't see us as women--we're mom.

penmage 04-23-2008 11:15 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Pixiesue (Post 2163317)
He gives me no support and even says things like "Mom you're old, you're fat its nature"

Geez, no wonder some animal species eat their young!

You can ABSOLUTELY do this!

JayEll 04-24-2008 06:33 AM

Oh, never mind about your son. I think he must have picked up some bad habits from dad... ;)

In any case, you can succeed in losing weight! Come up with your plan and stick to it. Since he's an adult, I assume he can figure out how to get his own food, if he doesn't want to have what you prepare.

We're here to cheer you on! :cheer2: Don't give up!

Jay

friendlykat4u 04-24-2008 12:59 PM

Have a serious and honest talk with him so he's aware of what he's doing. If he continues just cover your ears and go: "lalalalalalala not listening, don't care what you're saying lalalalala". LOL :D

You can absolutely do this, we're all here to support you. Like SusanB said, sometimes the support at home is the last one to come, but eventually it will.

Hang in there, you CAN do this, you WILL do this! :hug:

shannonmb 04-24-2008 01:11 PM

You go!
 
I loved "Apple Cheeks" reply! "Time for you to fly, son" hehehehe :carrot:

Kids are brats, bottom line! Don't get me wrong, we love em to death, and I would jump in front of a train to save my daughter. But if you're like me, a LOT of your extra weight is probably a result of stress eating, all the worry we mommies have to do all the time (are they healthy as babies, are they going to get stolen from the bus stop, will they survive their first breakup, will they ever grow up and get a job and move the heck out, etc, etc, etc).

Now is YOUR time, and he can get with the program, or you can just chuckle to yourself about all those young ones won't understand till they get a few more years behind them!!!!!! BIG :hug: WE can do this, I know it!!!!!

tabitha 04-24-2008 03:05 PM

The fact that he came back to support you when your marriage broke down shows that he's capable of being considerate and understanding how other people can be hurting.

Tell him how much the things he says upset you, how much you want to change your life, even show him this thread! Maybe he just doesn't realise how serious you are about this, so make it clear to him that this is so important to you and how dedicated you are to it. Maybe he thinks you should be pampering yourself instead of (in his eyes) depriving yourself and suffering even more.

Give him a chance to change by explaining to him how important this is to you. If he doesn't support you after that, then I agree with everyone else above :)

Spoz 04-24-2008 03:10 PM

If he wont support you, then prove him wrong!

Pixiesue 04-28-2008 11:04 AM

great replies everyone Thanks!

BrandNewJen 04-28-2008 01:29 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Glory87 (Post 2165331)
You should introduce him to the real devil - paying rent to uncaring landlords.

Ahahahahahahaha!!!!! :lol: Oh my gosh, Glory, that's awesome!

Seriously--- I was going to grad school and living with my mother and ANY time I would complain about ANYTHING... she'd simply say "Don't say one more word until you do some research and find out how much rent, utilities, and food cost to live on your own." That pretty much ended any argument we had. She was doing me a FAVOR by letting me live there. And never let me forget it.

Maybe your son is living with you to help financially support you. Maybe it's the other way around. EITHER WAY.. it doesn't matter. He says NOTHING or he is positive. Don't let him speak to you that way. It's YOUR HOME you allow only what you WANT in your home (whether that be FOOD or the type of attitude!!!!)


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