I hear what you are saying. I have struggled with binging and purging over the years.

My brother is a complete a**. I'll walk into a room where he's at, and he'll say "nice tent", referring to my shirt, no matter who else is in the room. And he's a big man, has admitted to binging and purging himself in the past. Of course, he'll talk about his own weight just as disrespectfully. He doesn't get it. (He did have a traumatic brain injury when he was 17--it's hard to separate that damage from his difficult personality).

But I sure do get angry and embarassed.

Amy

I am sorry you are faced with such comments. You shouldn't let other people make you feel bad about yourself. You know that there are many people here who understand this feeling. Years ago, when a friend of mine was feeling very insecure about herself (a lot was going on in her life) she called me out in the middle of my class, and said "You are so hairy, fat and ugly- do you think anyone would want you?" Other people in the room laughed... it hurt really bad. I know how much these things can damage ones' self esteem. But, like yourself, I am making positive changes in my life that will make my body and my mind healthier- and I am doing it for me, not for them. And, seriously, your weight right now really isn't high at all- you are starting where I did, but you are 2 inches taller than me! You probably look awesome and they are just jealous :P Ignore the people who don't appreciate you.... and yes, as someone else said, Karma is a B**** so it WILL come back.

Know why brothers say things like this? Because they knows it bugs you. I have two brothers and have lived through this type of scenario . . . many times. Many times I've wanted to my brothers for stupid things they say. The best thing to do when he or others make these type of comments? Aboslutely ignore them. Literally pretend you don't hear them and after they make their stupid comment, ask them something like 'hey, do you know what time it is?' or something similarly obsure. Act as if they haven't even spoken any time they make a comment about your wt. Yup, it takes nerves of steel to do this but if you do it and stick with it, they will eventually stop . . .because they will see that it no longer bugs you and is therefore no longer effective. (Of course, being a brother he may just come up w/new ways to torture you! )


Good luck w/your wt loss journey. Losing wt and being healthy is a great way to 'show 'em'!

I can relate. My brother always said mean things like that to me too when we were growing up. One time when I was trying to lose weight, he pinned me down and stuffed brownie in my mouth. Looking back, I don't know why my parents didn't intervene more. We are adults now and he still says little, niggling things to put me down. Now I see that his criticism says more about him than it does me. He's very insecure, and it's really very sad. Maybe you could try looking at where your brother's comments are coming from, and see them for the desperate attempt they are to make him feel better about himself. People who have a healthy sense of self-esteem don't put others down, they build others help and support them. I also think you should distance yourself from people who are mean to you and spend time with people (or pets!) who make you feel good about yourself.
Pam