Alternative Group (January 25, 2002)
 

We are a group of non-traditional lifestyle individuals. We are partnered, single, widowed, Pagan, Atheist, Agnostic, Christian, Muslim, gay, bi-sexual, bi-colored and straight. We bask in our diversity and unite in the same goal of losing weight. If you are relatively open-minded and accepting of ALL walks of life, please join us.

You know, I was reading over everyone's posts and realizing it's January, chicks...everyone's struggling to get OP and stay there for a little while. I think winter is rough, and all those holidays are rough, and now we're trying hard to jump back onto that wagon. (My apologies if I overlooked anyone who's already riding it!)

I have been trying to look at my program from a more spiritual angle, especially in light of my renewed attempt to lead a more religious life. I have a suspicion that I won't be successful until I really deep down feel a conviction not to overeat and to stay OP. It's hard to explain. At any rate, I have been examining my current state of affairs and it began to occur to me that perhaps there's an element of depression in there. I keep b**ching that I want my new life to start and I'm sick of this life, but I think I'm not just anxious and frustrated, but a little sad too. I think between being sad and being frustrated on multiple counts, I'm not limiting my food intake b/c it's the only comfort I have. Since I met the Guy, even though we're not in regular contact anymore my own loneliness has really been emphasized to me. (In about a week it will be a year since DH and I separated, can you believe it?) And it's winter, which is my crappiest time of year; I hate the cold, so I really can't stand to go out for a walk -- or to go out for any reason. I always feel like I'm holding myself tight waiting for it all to pass. Fortunately, the weather's been warmer than normal the past few days; I even slept with a window open last night. So those are all my challenges to address. I have to find a way to keep my fire stoked until I'm really out of here.

Amy, in your last thread you asked about DD and Spain. Yesterday DD decided she wants to drop an honors class that apparently she's on the verge of failing. I told her that after discussing it with her guidance counselor, and then with a couple admissions officers at schools she applied to (didn't hear from Spain yet b/c of the time difference), it's probably not a good idea to change her schedule from what was originally presented to them. When I talked to DD about it, she was adamant nevertheless, and then it came out that she was doing poorly in the class. I told her that if it's a withdraw/pass that's one thing, but if it's a withdraw/fail, she might lose her admitted status to Spain. She is still insistent, though, that she wants to drop it. The guidance counselor wants my permission, even though DD is 18, and I have to talk to her today about it (midterms are next week). I debated putting my foot down and not giving permission, but I think I am going to go with letting her decide, in keeping with my parental philosophy that at a certain point letting them make their own decisions and face the consequences of their actions is the best choice. I have explained everything to her, so she knows the possible outcomes. And I have told her -- repeatedly over time -- that I plan to be living in a studio apartment come the fall, and it won't be an option for her to live with me there if she screws up her own chances of going to college. Tough love? Life is tough, and bad decisions make it tougher. The sooner you learn that, the better. If she can't get her stuff together enough to pass classes now, and thinks simply withdrawing is an option, maybe she doesn't belong in college right now. She can always work and go to school part-time, and would probably do better as she matures. Look at how many of us work and go to school, myself included -- it's hard, but it's possible. If she pulls this crap in college, she'll be wasting money, which is really unacceptable.

Wow Ruthie, are you ever a wise mom.

I've had difficulty not stuffing myself these past few days, when my energy is very low and I'm sleepy I want to snack. Carbs too.

Had a banana, applesauce and 2 toasts this morning, and feel nicely stuffed. After the kids go to school I'm going to have a hot bath. Today I'll fold clothes, put some away perhaps, and putter. This weekend John is working a lot so aside from playing Euchre tomorrow night we're having a rather calm weekend.

On Feb 2nd there is something going on at the Royal Botanical Gardens called Seedy Saturday, where you go and exchange and purchase seeds from people. It's a way of keeping certain strains of heritage plants from disappearing. I've convinced hubby to go, I think it'll be nice to dream about the coming spring a bit. I have a lot of landscaping to do in my side garden this year.

I love gardening! :)

Have a wonderful day everyone!

L

Morning Guys!

Gray and dreary here! Guess that means no run, can't afford to get sick! Which adds up to a morning or whole day of playing catch up on my reading, which adds up to a day of having to worry about food! Grrrrr~

Will post soon, got to get the kids moving!

Amy
176/150/130

Commitments to my inner child
 

Sometimes my inner child is cranky and won't do what clearly needs to be done. So I try to keep in touch with my inner parent as well. (No wonder I'm large -- it's crowded in there!)

The deal is this: When I wake in the morning, even if I don't WANT to go walking, I have to get dressed and try it for five minutes. If I feel like crawling back into bed after five minutes -- I DO! No guilt, no lectures. It means that I probably need the rest, or at least the chance to be out from under the yoke of my responsibilities for that morning.

But you know what? Nineteen times out of 20, I keep walking.

I walked my first full marathon three weeks ago, weighing 242 pounds. That's 26.2 miles!! And I did it all thanks to those five minutes I made myself do throughout training.

Now my inner child and inner grownup are collaborating on our next big goal for June: Lose 25 pounds (6 pounds gone so far this month!), walk the Rock & Roll Marathon in San Diego .... and then we're all doing a parachute jump for our 42nd birthday!

Welcome Venus, and that's a pretty cool philosophy. I have a whole lot of things I need to force my inner child to do these days...

How do you walk marathons? Do they let you register and you just walk instead of run, or is there a walking section?

I am enjoying a very nice white bean and kale soup from Whole Foods for lunch. I have decided to stop buying foods whose ingredients I can't pronounce. It feels good, even though I'm paying a little more.

Time to go back to work :( .

Venus, join our group! I want to hear about your progress now!

Such a warm welcome!
 

Thank you for the welcome, Ruthie! It's great to be able to ''hang out'' with such inspiring folks!

I joined WW two years ago, at 311 pounds. After I'd lost 50 pounds and felt comfortable with my new activity level, a friend and I decided to step things up a bit and walk a marathon. We joined Team in Training, a part of the Leukemia and Lymphoma Society that trains endurance athletes who fundraise to fight blood-related cancers. (I'm a breast-cancer and leukemia survivor.)

A lot of marathons allow walkers, though many of the larger ones expect all participants to be done with the full 26.2 miles in 7 hours or less. Team in Training works with runners, walkers, cyclists, and triathletes to train for several different events -- so you can choose an event that's matched to your abilities. The walkers and runners start at the same time and do the same course ... we walkers just finish later (MUCH later!).

I've lost a total of 75 pounds since joining WW. Despite all the high-level working out, I lost only 25 pounds in the past year -- probably because training at that intensity builds muscle, which weighs more ... (and it's been tough to accept that! I keep thinking, "DANG! I work out enough -- I should be a stringbean by now!").

Team in Training asked if I'd be a mentor for other walkers this year, and I'm going to do that this fall. Spring is for weight loss, and for getting one more marathon under my belt before I coach others. Who knows? If I meet my mini weight-loss goal, I might be running by fall ......

Every day's still hard, though. As I know y'all know!! I HATE struggling with the eating issues. When does that end?!??!?!

Hello everyone :wave: Happy Friday!

Tomarrow I'm going to reaquaint myself with a sewing machine! I'm going to make 2 door snakes and some skirting to go around the bottom of my L shaped table in my craft room to be secured with velcro to the table (so you can't see all the crap I have shoved under the table!). I'm looking forward to re-learning to sew! Eventually I need to remove the door from my bedroom into the master bath. It's in a really funky place and I want to replace it with a real lush curtain of some sort. Gotta brush up on my sewing skills before I do that!

Amyjo - a nurse! How wonderful!!! My Aunt's a nurse... I'd love to be around the new mommies too - and to see a C-section! I watch the TV programs that show babies being born all the time - I don't want one (not gonna be a mom in this life I think), I just love watching them come into the world with that "this AGAIN???" look on their faces.:angel:

Ruthie - Yes, winter can be the pits. I just moved from CA where winter is, well, a joke, to central Oregon where from the week after Thanksgiving to the week before last we had NO SUN. NONE. I was crying, depressed and thought I was gonna hurt someone... add into that the life changes you've gone through and it's no doubt you feel a little "off". The year I divorced and moved to Oregon I was gonna change my life and be everything that I knew I was. Instead I spent the first year+ wallowing in a "why isn't life grand" phase. Heck, it's been 3 years and I'm still trying to finish becoming the person I know I am deep inside. So goes being in your 30's though I guess... :rolleyes:
Anyway, yes, winter can be bad - too bad it's also one of my favorite times of year. I love rain, snow and blustery weather... it just makes me suicidal... :rolleyes:

Lamorgan - Seedy Saturday sounds wonderful! I have 5 acres I need to do something with once we are out of our frost. I've never had a yard, so going from a houseplant to 5 acres is going to be scary! May my thumb be green and the deer go elsewhere to snack...

VenusEnvy - Welcome!!! I agree with your "just 5 minutes". I do that when I walk out the garbage. I have a 280 foot long driveway and it never fails that once I get to the end of it I've talked myself into walking the mile and back that is to the furthest next street and home. As for the parachute... you go right ahead... I've got a perpetual fear of hights (as in my kitchen step stool makes my head spin). You have fun though!!:o

Well, have a great weekend everyone! I'm outta here until Monday!

Terri

Hi girls.

Venus, welcome to our group! You are an inspiration already...marathons no less!

Ruthie, I'm really struggling too. Find myself eating comfort food just because I want to, not because I'm hungry. I haven't done horribly this week, just not as well as I want to. I am beyond tired of being this size, but just can't seem to get it all together at the same time to have some effect. I seem to either get the exercise OR the diet on track, but the other lapses. I am back to journalling tomorrow. Even if I 'm not OP, at least I have to face myself in writing.

I've hurt my back, and I don't know how or exactly what it is. I got out bed Tuesday morning and couldn't straighten up, then had a horrible sharp pain that seems to radiate out from my lower back up under my ribcage. Now I have a constant dull ache more on the right side, but both sides hurt just below my waist in my lower back. I'm taking my Naprosyn that I have for my hands, but after being at work all day, it's really sore.

Lamorgan, wish I had a garden, I miss having one.

Punkin, glad to hear you're taking up sewing again. I was a seamstress by trade at one time, and have been sewing since I was only 8 years old. If you have any questions, feel free to ask and I'll see if I can explain it so it makes sense without actually being able to show you. :)

Flower how are you doing?

Well, I walked by the mirror tonight and thought, hey I don't look that bad. So I stopped and went back to look again, and I really don't look that awful. I'm overweight, but I'm aight. I am really working on just feeling good about myself and focusing on other things than gotta be thin, gotta be thin, gotta be thin. You know what? When I was thin I was living a life of chaos and a lot of unhappiness. Terri, you're right, we make a life change and we expect perfection. The **** with perfection -- I want to be the best I can be in the areas that are important to me. I know once I accept myself I will stop overeating. I feel like I'm really, really on the verge of a breakthrough in how I think about the weight I've gained. (Staying away from my sister has been very important in that effort, BTW. She's thin and chaotic and unhappy....)

I have been wrestling all day (and yesterday, to tell the truth, and for a couple weeks, to be really honest) with my feelings about the Guy. I feel so strongly about him and i want to talk to him, but at the same time I can't accept the messed up things about his situation, so my brain wants me to stay away until he straightens it out (if he does). I didn't realize how lonely I was until I started talking to him, and now I'm like, damn, sometimes I hate being alone.

All right, I've posted too much today and I'm blabbering. Sorry. ;)

Wildfire, take care of yourself. Hope you're feeling better. Venus, I want to do Team in Training (have a close relative with a rare form of lymphoma). Where do I sign up?

Ruthie, I have those moments, too, when I think "hey, I look pretty good today"....why can't they last? Before I know what's happened I'm back at the bottom hating myself for not losing this weight yet. I know I am much harder on myself than other people see me....if I was really as horrible as I think I am, strange men wouldn't flirt with me, and the guys at work wouldn't compliment me like they do. Not to mention my husband thinks I am beautiful and tells me so a few times a day. I just can't believe it when I'm not happy with me. I completely hate the media and the fashion industry for twisting our minds they way have. Regarding the Guy, you know you're doing what's best if he has some things in his life that are messed up. You don't want to take on someone else's problems just when you're on your way to getting your own life going in the direction you've been waiting for. It wouldn't hurt to have dinner with him now and then, and keep in touch. You know, there are benefits to being single that I miss...not having to clean up behind anyone, coming and going when and how you please without having to consider someone else and their schedule, cooking what/when you want to...but I know it doesn't make up for the companionship and just having someone there to lean on.

Okay, today is brand new day, fresh start and all that stuff....I am going to do my best to stay OP, journal, and drink my water....despite that yummy chocolate cake that hubby brought home last night. I have to get it together!

Hello Goddesses!!!!
 

Ruthie, when I hear you talk about your daughter I realize what an awesome responsibility it must be to be a parent. [Which is probably why I opted out for this lifetime! :o ]

Welcome, Venus! I know what you mean; I work out more than anyone I know, I should be a rail by now. I'm learning [again!!!] that I'm not the kind of person that can never go back to my old lifestyle, that I have to stay on top of it all the time. Sometimes, and this is my inner cry-baby, I get so envious of people who can just eat whatever they want without giving it a thought and I have to be constantly vigilant. Oh well....And my karma has put me in the position of cooking as my profession and it's almost comical sometime! :)

Lamorgan, I'd forgotten that you garden. You can be our green-thumbed garden goddess, inspiring us to get out there and plant something green and EDIBLE!!!

Wildfire, I hope your back's better soon.

Last night, I went for a HUGE grocery shop at the wholefoods place last night and by jingo, I'm all set! I've got so much healthy food in the house that there's no way I could go wrong. [knock wood.]

Had a bad episode at work the other day where I went mad for sweets--felt like an addict so I'm severely restricting my sugar intake now. Oooh, it was ugly.......

Healthy weekend, everybody!

Just as an FYI, I checked out that Team in Training's web site -- and I am so impressed! My cousin died of leukemia and I have a close family member with a rare form of lymphoma, so the idea of doing something that will raise funds for those cancers AND be good for my health is just awesome! I registered to have someone contact me about joining. Thanks, Venus!

Grrrrrr....

Just when I was hating the fashion industry, I needed to go shopping. So off I hobbled to the mall...forget the stores in the actual mall that only sell sizes I can barely remember...I went to the department stores on either end. I ended up spending $173.00 on three bras with matching panties and a pair of black panties to go with a bra I already have. Is that ludicrous or what? First it took me two hours to actually find the bras in a 38DD cup....scarcer than hen's teeth, I'm tellin ya! Then the bras are a good $10 more than the exact same ones in a D cup. I'm only a size 14-16, which really isn't that huge....why is it so damn hard to find clothes? And why do I have to pay more because it's one size larger? It's not like there's THAT much more fabric involved, for pete's sake! Can you tell I'm just a little irked?:mad:
Victoria's Secret sells my size, but by the time I pay the duty to get it into Canada I don't save much. That's something I'd like to do someday....have a lingerie store for women that stocks sizes for normal people!

And now my back and my ankle (don't think I mentioned I twisted my ankle this week too) are both killing me. Thanks for the well wishes, I think my back will work itself out eventually. I don't think it's anything like a herniated disc or pulled muscle. Just did something in my sleep.

'K, I'm gonna take some more drugs and wallow in some light popcorn while I watch a movie with hubby....and have my water on the rocks. :D

First of all, Welcome Venus!!!!

Wildfire-I am fine, how are you feeling today????

Eydie-has the sugar monster tamed it's ugly head???? :lol: I such splurge the sugar from my diet as well. Maybe next week I will. Sounds like a date! :dizzy:

Ruthie-how are you???? I am sure you look wonderful 95% of the time that you walk by the mirror!!!! I will give you 4% for bad hair days and 1% for monthly acne!!!! :lol:

Punkinseed-how is the sewing coming along? I have a sewing machine. It is a reconditioned one. But I can never get the lower tention correct for more than 10 minutes and I get frustrated and quit. One of these days I will try again. I have a pair of pants to be hemmed that I got yesterday from Costco. Mom thought they looked way comfy. :^: They just brarely fit. No large meals. They look wonderful on though. No baggy fabric in sight. I think once I get myself modivated again, they will feel wonderful on.

Lamorgan-seedy Saturday sounds like fun. Since I have no dogs now, I think I may plant a garden. I had better seriously start planning as we have to do things way early here to avoid harvest in August. Nothing survives August in LV.

Amy-how are the early rounds going??? Are you getting used to it? I have noticed the same cars on the freeway as I go to work the last week. I have never had to drive far, or at the same time. It is wierd to have a schedule.


I start the The Great Indoors on Wednesday. Tomorrow is my last day at the college. I will miss my flexible schedule and working near the greenhouse. But I won't miss my boss's moodiness, being her vent board, the dull monotonous work, or the wondering what I will be doing all day.

Mom took me to Costco yesterday. I got lots of freezer meats, and some pantry snack items for the children. I will do another large shopping when I get paid so the supply doesn't get too low and we have to head off to fast food. Griffin must gain weight before next checkup. He is at 10% for weight. Not acceptable since he is growing taller yet not getting any heavier. It took me a while to find snack foods that he can eat without choking, with no dairy and little amounts of refined sugar that he will eat. I wish i had that problem!!!

I have been spending gobs of time with bf. We are getting along marvelously. Better than ever probably. Saturday nights are game nights. We played Yahtzee and who wants to be a millionare mini version last night. Monopoloy was last Sat. I picked up two games at the thrift store last weekend for 1$ each. We will try them next.

Well, off to do my annual Sunday laundry! Crazy!!!!! ~flower

Yum Yum,1% cottage cheese mixed with applesauce! Breakfast this morning... I'm starving! The moon is glorius out there, so full and bright.

I had my old Singer sewing machine out yesterday hemming some Gap Flare jeans my friend picked up for my daughter at Salvation Army. Perfect condition, just too long. They cost less than a dollar.

Had a pretty good weekend, suffering some pms, it's worse when I don't drink enough water, and I've been not drinking my water. So my breasts are really sore, and I'm very grumpy/sensitive.

Played Euchre on Sat night with our Euchre group, but it went way too late and I didn't get to bed until 2am so yesterday I slept late and then last night I had insomnia.

Flower ~ my daughter was always in the 10th percentile for growth. It was such a worry after the first child was at the other end of the scale. At age 1 her doctor wanted to do many tests to confirm that everything was ok, but we oped out. I took a look at my family history, and although I'm a tall 5'5" (ha ha), my mother and sisters height varied from 5' to 5'2". I figured she was going to be petite. Morgan will be lucky to make it to 5'3", I think. But she is the healthiest of all of the kids.

Wildfire what about La Senza? I haven't bought nice bras in years... My friend in town spends 150.00 on her bras, she goes to a shop in Toronto.

Edyie ~ I think that when you live in Southern Ontario a lot of the thrill in gardening is dreaming about it through the winter. I have some landscaping to do this year and I want to keep it kind of period with the house, with lots of old lilac and roses and things.

Have a great day to everyone ~

Lois

Bliss and bluster
 

Thank you, everyone, for the warm welcomes!! I feel very much at home here.

Ruthie -- soooooooooooooooo glad you contacted Team in Training! They are the coolest people ever. You go, grrrrl!! It's a great feeling to do something that's good for us and even better for others.

Sometimes I get so into feeling my own aches and anguishes that I forget that there are others who don't have the same luxury as I do to choose whether to walk or work out or go biking ... or even to choose what to eat. Sort of puts things into perspective. (Not to say that I keep perspective ALL the time ...)

Anyway, it's neat to be here with y'all, and I am already learning lots of good things from some extraordinarily wise women.

Kim

Hello all!

The weekend went too quick... I hate that... :mad:
I didn't eat all that well which is something I really need to curb. I do this - say "I'm going to get healthy" then take 3 months to put any plans into action. I've been watching Discovery's Body Challenge and that's been motivating, also seeing a program on TV this weekend about obesity really got me thinking about not only what my body looks like on the outside - but more importantly, on the inside. Eeek!
I bought the weatherproof jacket, new shoes and sweats for a reason - guess I should use them and quit wasting my money... :rolleyes: Today I WILL walk...

Wildfire & Flower - *sigh*, the sewing went ok. I'm glad I bought extra fabric though. I haven't touched a sewing maching in oooh, about 9 years??? I did managed to get my 2 door snakes done with not much fabric left over. I didn't get my table curtains done because I didn't have an empty bobbin (excuses, excuses) and was just too plain lazy to walk to my Mom's to get one. I did get all the fabric cut out though!

Wildfire - Ouuuuch! I hope your back (oh, and ankle) feels better! Actually, I'm wondering if you might be walking funny on your hurt ankle - it may be what caused the back problem??
I know what you mean about the extra $$ for plus-sized clothes. Wal-Mart does that. Makes me SO mad! Like I'm not paying enough in other ways for being heavy now I need to pay you schmucks an extra $2 for a shirt?!?!? Geez...

Lamorgan - Yes, the moon's been beautiful! Out here in the boonies it's been so bright at night, it's been wonderful (except when I want to sleep). My cat's have been enjoying the night-time brightness too - they kept me up 'till midnight last night playing and tearing through the house. I guess my 8 month old kitty, Luna, is named appropriately, huh?? :) (Stella, her younger sister, has no excuse!).

Well, back to work and try to warm up. It's about 15 outside and even looking outside makes me cold!! Brrrrrrrr.... Spring IS coming, right?????

Terri :wave:

(today is "Accountability Monday")

Stella and Luna are your cat's names?? What wonderful names. My all-time favourite children's story is Stella Luna; it's about a small bat, who gets lost and ends up living with some birds. My cats all have dull names... (Thanks to children) Smokey, Morris, Tipsy, BJ, Wild Mama and Buttons.

Pop back later,

Lois

Waah, I'm tired, girls, why did you let the post sink to the bottom of the page and make me post at 5:25 AM when I'm sooooooo tired? :lol: I was up later than usual last night; went to XDH's house for dinner with his two bros, nephew and my DD. One of his bros was up from Florida and I haven't seen him in a couple years; I walked right past him in the lobby of the building! :o At any rate, I got home, did some reading as usual and didn't turn my light out till like 10:30, so I'm beat. I have typing to do this morning, so again, waaaaah. (If nothing else, I'm an excellent whiner.) Did I tell you guys the book I'm reading? It's by a philosopher named Al-Ghazali who lived about 1,000 years ago and did this long treatise on spirituality; this book is a section of that, and it's about learning to discipline yourself and control your desires. It's pretty cool so far, and even though it's 1,000 years old, I think it's going to be of help to me in my spiritual fight against living a life controlled by desire (I sure hope that made sense and didn't sound like blah blah blah blah blah).

Yes, the moon has been awesome the past couple of days, but it's making people act crazy. At work, we can always tell when it's full moon b/c it literally makes people act like insane idiots.

I fasted yesterday just b/c I could. It felt good.

Terri, I have the same problem getting myself to just get out there and do it. If you do, I will!

Kim, you're so right about perspective. Did anybody here see Chris Rock's special on HBO a few years ago? (I saw it in rerun on Comedy Central.) He does a bit where he says our problem in America is that we've got too much food.

Lois, I like your tip about water and PMS. I'm going to try it next time I start feeling symptoms.

Flower, thanks for the compliment! Good luck at your new job!

Wildfire, hope you're feeling better. Hey, drugs and movies -- sounds like a perfect evening in! :lol:

Eydie, I love Whole Foods. It can get expensive, but the more I think about how I want to live my life, the more I realize that buying organic and socially responsible foods is worth the money I make. And yes, being a parent is an awesome responsibility that I have at times failed at miserably. The one thing I do give myself credit for is realizing that my job has always been to prepare her for adulthood, not to make her be a pleasurable part of my life. I have a close friend whose daughter is a sophomore in college and my friend STILL hasn't adjusted to her being gone! Perhaps fortunately for her, the DD is on academic probation and will get kicked out if she doesn't improve her grades -- I don't if my friend is actually happy about that.

Sunday morning I spent about five and a half hours getting my head straight. I had been getting really depressed and, as I had posted, really upset about the Guy and my life and yadda yadda. I actually burned some incense while I purged my life of traces of the Guy -- deleted his e-mail messages (well, I saved them into a Word document), erased his voice mail messages I had saved, and surfed the internet reading and thinking and realizing all the reasons why I can't keep thinking about the empty aspects of my life and how my "real" life is going to be starting soon. I have to live my life now, too. I can't wait for the Guy, or for grad school, or for when I lose weight, or for when I quit my job, or any of those things. I have to be active and happy now. Since I stopped going to the bar, my weekends have consisted basically of sitting on the sofa, taking Xanax, watching TV and eating. Pretty sad, huh? I have to make myself go out and do things -- the trick is just to find people to do them with, but I have to work at it. So I got my mind right and then I spent the rest of the day catching up on school work I had neglected, then typing. Speaking of which....gotta go.

K guys, I have now revived the thread. Now get posting! Just send in a small blurb to say how you're doing generally and with your program! Take care.

Hello all...

Headache again today... another storm coming in. I really do wish I didn't have a barometric pressure sensor in my head. Really I do... Ug...

Lamorgan - Yup, Stella and Luna are my babies. Luna came first, she's almost 9 months old. I had her for almost a week before a name came to me. She was a whacky kitten and I wanted to name her something at least *somewhat* Pagan - it was a full moon and the term "moon crazy" came to mind, then Luna, the basis of lunatic. Stella, her sister from the next litter - same mother (my best friend owns the momma cat, named Demeter) is only 4 months old, and a polydactyl kitty. Stella is Italian for star, the perfect complement to my moon girl. It wasn't until much later that someone mentioned StellaLuna, the children's book. When my best friend brought Stella the 6 week old furball, home, she also brought me the book StellaLuna. I've toyed with getting a male named Sol for sun... but do I really need 3 cats??? heheheehe....

Ruthie - the book sounds really interesting! I've been trying to get through "The 4 Agreements" - but you can tell it was writen in another language and translated. For me it's been a difficult read. I'm also reading (simultaniously) Lord of the Rings, The Red Tent and a book by John Edward (love him!). I need to focus on one of the books though - I read too many at once and can't focus on any!:dizzy:

Well, I'm proud to say I've had one full day on program. Today is the start of the second day.... Finger's crossed and all my meals all ready planned!!!! :D

Later Gators!

Terri

Hey guys, could post a book today but that will have to wait until I actually have time. Just wanted to say hey. Not OP, Not caring at this moment- I can only juggle so many balls at one time and right now, diet and sleep are at the bottom of the list!

Just wanted to say hey!

Mornings aren't any better Flower, FYI!

Hugs to you all,
Amy
176/150-130

Hi girls!

I did pretty good today. Ate sensibly and got that feeling of being able to control myself back! :D I also went grocery shopping after work to stock up on some good lunch stuff, which we were lacking. All I could find this morning to take was tomato soup and crackers and a granny smith apple. I was starving by the time I got home!

When I come back from Montreal I am going to treat myself to a Rodney Yee yoga video. I've heard such great things about him! My back is feeling better, possibly partly because of all the stretching I've been doing.

I bowled so horribly last night I offered to leave and let the team have my absentee score! :D They might have been better off. I didn't bowl over a 140 before handicap all night!

Flower, good luck with your first day on the new job tomorrow! Great to hear you're getting along so wonderfully with Chris.

Lamorgan, I checked LaSenza online for bra sizes, and they carry just a few in DD. I did pop into the store, but there wasn't a DD in the whole place.

Punkin, I've been reading the transcripts for the Body Challenge online, but they're a little scrambled compared to watching the show. Glad your adventure in sewing turned out okay. :) Stella and Luna are great names....I say go for the Sol, though! My chats noir are Salem and Sherlock.

Amyjo, hang in there!

Venus, how was your day?

Ruthie, sounds like you're sorting things out, that's good. You are so right about living for now and being happy now. I even hate to shop at times because I want to wait until I'm thin again to buy new clothes....but I still need to look good now! Ooh...speaking of which, I bought a new coat tonight and stuck it in the closet without even trying it on because I had my hands full of groceries.

Gotta go do that!

Let's have a great OP day tomorrow!

Once upon a time the colors of the world started to quarrel: all claimed that they were the best, the most important, the most useful, the favorite.

GREEN said: "Clearly I am the most important. I am the sign of life and of hope. I was chosen for grass, leaves, trees--without me, all animals would die. Look out over the countryside and you will see that I am in the majority."

BLUE interrupted: "You only think about the Earth, but consider the sky and sea. It is the water that is the basis of life and drawn up by the clouds from the deep sea. The sky gives space and peace and serenity. Without my peace, you would all be nothing."

YELLOW chuckled:"You are all so serious. I bring laughter, gaiety, and warmth to the world. The sun is yellow, the moon is yellow, the stars are yellow. Every time you look at a sunflower, the whole world starts to smile. Without me, there would be no fun."

ORANGE started next to blow her temper. "I am the color of health and strength. I may be scarce but I am precious for I serve the needs of human life. I carry the most important vitamins. Think of carrots, pumpkins, oranges, mangos, and pawpaws. I don't hang around all the time, but when I fill the sky at sunrise or sunset, my beauty is so striking that no one gives another thought to any of you".

RED could stand it no longer. He shouted out: "I am the ruler of all of you! I am blood! Life's blood! I am the color of danger and of bravery. I am willing to fight for a cause. I bring fire to the blood! I am the color of passion and of love, the red rose, the poppy and the poinsettia. Without me, the earth would be as empty as the moon!"

PURPLE rose up to his full height. He was very tall and spoke with great pomp: "I am the color of royalty and power. Kings, chiefs, and bishops have always chosen me for I am a sign of authority and wisdom. People do not question me, they listen and obey".

Finally, INDIGO spoke, much more quietly than all the others, but with just as much determination: "Think of me. I am the color of silence. You hardly notice me, but without me you all become superficial. I represent thought and reflection, twilight and deep water. You need me for balance and contrast, for prayer and inner peace."

And so all the colors went on boasting and quarreling, each convinced of their own superiority. Soon, their quarreling became louder and louder. Suddenly there was a startling flash of bright lightening! Thunder rolled and boomed! Rain started to pour down relentlessly.

The colors crouched down in fear drawing close to one another for comfort.

In the midst of the clamor, RAIN began to speak: "You foolish colors, fighting amongst yourselves, each trying to dominate the rest. Don't you know you were each made for a special purpose, unique and different? Join hands with one another and come to me."

Doing as they were told, the colors united and joined hands. The RAIN continued: "From now on, when it rains, each of you will stretch across the sky in a great bow of colors as a reminder that you can all live in peace. The rainbow is a sign of hope for tomorrow".

And so, whenever a good rain washes the world, and a rainbow appears in the sky, let us remember to appreciate one another.

author-unknown

Well, chicks, as Venus already knows, I am registering today with Team in Training. I couldn't be more excited. I think it's going to be a great opportunity to do some good for others and for myself.

I met with my personnel department yesterday to go over some issues regarding continuing benefits when I leave -- or as I put it, if an employee should hypothetically leave ;) . I believe I will be giving notice for May 3! Woo hoo! :D Which means I will most likely actually be giving that notice in about a month, since I wanted to give my boss generous lead time. Even though it's going to be rough financially, I am so happy to finally be starting the process of moving on, breaking away from this old life and traveling on down the line to the next! I have been thinking just a little bit about all the things I can do during May and June to get ready for all the changes in my and DD's lives. It will be wonderful to have the time free to take care of business.

Hey Flower, cool story -- today's your first day on the new job, right? Good luck! I'm sure you'll be great.

Wildfire, sounds like you're off to a good start. I agree with you on the issue of buying clothes even though you're not at the weight you want to be -- in keeping with my new philosophy of not waiting for my "thin" life to start, I have been thinking of buying some new clothes. I wear the same damn clothes every six days or so. That's ridiculous. I have a couple Rodney Yee videos. They are very ... mellow and even-paced.

Punkinseed, what is "The Four Agreements"? Congrats on the one day OP down!

Amy, I know what you mean about juggling ... I'm forever dropping one ball or another! Hang in there!

Wanted to say a quick 'good morning' before work. this is my 5th day OP---feels great! I'm rediscovering what it feels like to take care of myself in all kinds of ways.

Sounds like everyone's doing well----about the Rodney Yee videos, I have a few and they're all great--not to mention Rodney's quite easy on the eyes! :D

Will check in later!

2002 off to a good start!
 

It's very encouraging to read how well everyone's doing with daily struggles as we work our way into 2002. I think the most helpful thing of all is to know that others DO struggle every day -- and that we're all perfectly mortal in having some days that just aren't perfect. Thank you all for sharing the good, the bad, and the ugly!

Ruthie, I'm so excited about knowing another TNT team member!! (( (( congrats! )) )) You'll probably start training fairly soon, right? Our Raleigh NC chapter starts group walks this Saturday. Anyway, I know you'll have a blast!

I've lost 2 pounds this week, mostly in anticipation of getting back to my regular routine and being extremely careful about journaling my points. While I was journaling last week, I noticed I wasn't getting enough fruits and veggies. And then someone (not sure which thread) miraculously posted a link to a site that recommended ''creating a still life'' for yourself every day -- setting a plate of fruit on your desk or table, and snacking from it throughout the day. I've been doing that for the past two weeks, and it seems to be helping me stay out of the cookies (this has been hard, as I'm just starting to date, and I've been freaking out about that). It seems expensive, but I don't spend on fast food or chips or cookies or all those fat-laden horrors I used to eat, so I'm actually saving a lot of money even if I spend $5 a day on fruits I love. PLUS, it's such a beautiful addition to my office!

Well, back to the grind ...

A silly good morning to you all.
 

:dizzy:
This morning when I left the house at 5:30, the world was covered in a fine layer of ice. The trees, the shrubs, the grass, the mailboxes and it was so cool to hear the trees kind of clinking in the breeze. There was a fine rain, but it wasn't too slippery, only on the wooden steps here and there. Then the fine rain turned into a kind of ice thing, and now it's snowing.

Tea tastes flat today. Sigh. I yelled at my youngest who decided that he HATES his snowpants. They are a spare pair, with over the shoulder straps, because the other kind that he likes (no silly shoulder straps) are too tight. So I shrieked at him "SHUT-UP" and that is a word I NEVER use, let alone hurl it at the kids. So he was sad, and I felt badly. I hate sending them off for a day of school after I've yelled at them. The 12 year old daughter didn't want to wear her boots, so I yelled at her too. Luckily the 9 year old is wise and didn't do anything to cause yet another spectacle from mother, he simply got ready and went.

I went to my local (tiny) public library yesterday, I'm hoping to irritate them enough to hire me. Last year I applied for a job as an adult page, but didn't get it. The job has come up again and now I'll be agitated for the next few weeks, until I find out whether I have it or not. It's only 10 hours a week, but would be a foot in the door to be in the system. When I graduate, I would have first dibs on the jobs that come up within the 6 libraries in the surrounding towns.

I feel a bit as though I'm a nervous wreck. After the disappointment last year when I didn't get the job, it took me forever to get up enough nerve to swallow my pride and go back into the library. It was awkward as ****.

I did a tarot reading and got good positive (yes you will get the job) cards.

This morning I had a huge bowl of soup, cabbage/veg/hamburger. Nothing else would do, I had to have savory. But it filled me up.

I think I'll go do some art, all this energy needs to be focused.

Have a wonderful day to you all ~ Hope you have a great first-day-of-work Flower!

Lois

nope, no first day for me. my drug test results aren't back so I gotta wait. :( :?: :mad: There is nothing more madening than knowing that you could pass a million drug tests, yet I must wait for proof to be able to start. Such a messed up society. Everyone is treated guilty until proven innoscent! I was so looking forward to today. I am gonna try to enjoy my day and find my hidden silver lining! ~flower

Good morning ladies :D

I'm OP, but woke up this morning SO hungry that I was nauseous and all that sounded good was a PBnJ. So I made one, it was icky, but it calmed my stomach down. I also made it with 1/2 the peanut butter of "normal" sandwiches, which was good.

I WALKED YESTERDAY!!!!! :dizzy: Yes, it was 30 degrees and I froze my butt off - but I did it. One mile - not much, but considering I haven't been physically active in yeeeeears, it's a start!

Wildfire - Rodney Yee, oh yes... I'm going to agree with Eydie here. Good teacher and quite a treat to watch too. The bendy-twisty woman he works with sometimes bugs me though... no honey, we can't ALL do back bends like you!!!

Ruthie - "The Four Agreements" is by Donn Miguel (Donn as in what I think is the equivalent of a Mexican knight of sorts??). The agreements are the things in life that you KNOW to be truths and that we are all essentially on the same page on. Everyone recognizes them as truths (agreements being something we all agree on) and apparently these specific 4 agreements are some that he thinks will make us better people by adopting them. So far I've only gotten to the first agreement - being impecable with your word. It goes into depth on how much of an impact our spoken/writen word has and how we can use our word for good or to harm. Like I said, it was writen in Spanish originally and I'm having a hard time following the English translation as he keeps repeating himself (sometimes 4 times, just in different words). The message is great, if I can get through the rest of the book!
He also has a long paragraph in the first agreement on how words can work "black magic" which I really, really have a hard time with his terminology because he's not using the term "black magic" as an euphamism, but literally - and implying evil. Also implying that only in being Christian can you be "good". Ug... I mean, can't I just learn something without feeling my beliefs "attacked"? Whatever, guess I'll just never be "good"... :rolleyes: (mini-rant over)

Lamorgan - Good luck in your quest to be irritating! I hope they hire you on so at least you've got your foot in the door! Don't think of it as irritating, call it "constant, somewhat bothersome, persistant attempts" to get them to open their eyes. They NEED you - remember that! ;)

I'm off... gotta try to wake up so I can get some work done. Another cuppa tea might help, but I just want my bed...

Terri :wave:

Another good day. I'm not actually counting points again, yet. I'm working on portion control and putting an end to mindless munching. Had a reasonable breakfast, lunch, and dinner, and my mouth is closed for the night.

We are in for our first snowstorm of the season tonight! Getting to work in the morning will be an adventure. We don't stay home for any reason. :rolleyes:

Flower, great post about the colors of the rainbow! Did they give you any idea how long before your tests come back?

Ruthie, May 3 will be here before you know it. Can you believe January is gone already? Although I have a closet full of clothes, I seem to wear the same dozen or so things, too. Probably because my size varies from month to month, and only that many are comfortable at a time! :D Rodney's tapes are mellow and even-paced, huh? Maybe I could learn to transfer some of that mellowness and even-pacedness (is that a word?) to my life. It could use some!

Have any of you found that although your weight stays the same, your body changes? I'm the same weight now that I was three years ago, but things I wore then are tight in the waist now. :( Gotta get back to those crunches!

Eydie, congrats on the five day streak! Yes, I've see Rodney and he would be acceptable to gaze at! :D

Venus, *whoo hoo*....2 lbs!!! You go, girl! Now, what's this about you starting to date???? ;)

Lamorgan, I'm thinking the moon must be affecting us here....we've all been cranky and short-tempered, too. Keeping my fingers crossed you'll get the library job!

Punkin, I get that "need food or I'm gonna puke" feeling some mornings, too. It's horrible. Must have something to do with blood sugar levels. Way to go on the walk!

It sounds like we're on an upswing here...let's stay on top of it!

Lamorgan, You're right about getting your foot in the door at the library. That's how it worked with my husband; for the past 10+ years he's had a job with the library that he adores!

Would you believe it was 70 degrees here today?! Very odd; it's normally cold this time of year. I'm not questioning it, just enjoying! I bought an annual pass for a local park and I've walked there the past 5 days. It's great--regular walking and lots of trails and I feel safe there too as long as I don't venture too far off. More afraid of bears than 2-leggeds!

Punkinseed, I read the 4 Agreements and loved it--altho I think you can read the inside cover and get it as much out of that as reading the entire book. I don't recall the Christian aspect of it---maybe I just blocked that part out! :lol:

Ever have that stage in your weight loss where it's just plain fun? I'm happy to say that that's where I am now. Like making it into a game? For example, I tell myself if I don't have this extra piece of toast I'm saving 100 calories, and later if I have an orange instead of a cookie...." I'm so easily amused!


:D

I absolutely cannot believe that the school buses are running today, with all the snow and freezing rain that is happening out there. My kids are walkers, but usually if the buses are cancelled, the walkers can stay home and the school doesn't care...

Oh well.

I belong to an organic food club, and re'd my order last night... Lots of yummy healthy foods to fill my larder. It really is worth looking into joining or forming a food co-op if you want to purchase healthy foods that cost less than the health food stores.

Eydie, what does your husband do at the library? I'm going for an adult Page job, but am taking Library Technician at Mohawk College part time. And yes, I can relate how the whole diet thing feels when it pulls together and seems to just roll along... but I'm not quite there now.... :) It's a wonderful feeling to be that much on top of it.

It was surreal out this morning walking in the storm before the plows were out. Everything looks so different, really cool.

Diet is so-so. Not terrible, but we're low on groceries so cooking lite becomes a true challenge when the vegies are gone and all that is left are the starchy pasta and potatos! I'm even out of carrots and onions and garlic! If the weather keeps up, may not get to the store today.

Will have to make soup somehow with no onions and garlic, sigh. I did get some Miso with my food order so maybe I should use it.

Eldest son is lurking, he is in need of the computer, need to go...

Lois

Lamorgan-I am thinking good job vibes for you! It is cold here too, but thankfully we are mild compared to the rest of you! The town I was considering moving to is -13 right now!

I have been up since 4 am. Grif is so congested he is not sleeping well. Babys are nose breathers and he sounds like a freight train! We finally decided to get up. I took a hot bath, read the paper and now I am going to clean my desk. I cleaned our bedroom closet yesterday. Yook over 10 hours. I have tons of crud stored in there. I destroyed lots of paperwork. I have room for my shoes on the floor now and I found the mates to all of them! Imagine that!

As for TGI, they said they would call by tomorrow to reschedule my orientation. I have the impression that I was not the only one not able to go to yesterdays orientation. So, time to wait on the phone! ~flower

Happy Friday-eve!

Good morning all... I am SO happy tomarrow's Friday! I am planning and anticipating next week's Taco Bell visit - it's been 3 weeks since I've indulged in my favorite bean burritoes and I think if I plan, I can do it.

I broke out my step yesterday. I have a wonderful full sized step that I got from Jazzercise when I worked for them and it's been collecting dust for years. I got through about 15 minutes before my legs were threatening to leave me. I decided moderation is probably best and I DID want to be able to walk to work today, so I quit for the day. But it did feel good!!!!

Wildfire - Yes, your body can change and weight stay the same - it's all in the muscle. It bugs me when people say "muscle weighs more than fat" - a pound of muscle and a pound of fat still weigh a pound - it's just that the muscle takes up approximately 1/3 of the space of fat. So, if you quit doing crunches, your weight may not change, but the space that the muscle took up can be easily taken up by fat, which, pound for pound takes up a LOT more space on your body - and your weight wouldn't change - just the dimentions. :p

Eydie - The whole Christianity "thing" in The 4 Agreements is heavily implied - not outright. Maybe I just read more inbetween the lines than I should... I also think you're right - I coulda' just read the jacket cover! :rolleyes:
I do know what you mean by weight loss being "fun" eventually! I'm only into week 2 (still somewhat honeymooning) but since this is the 4th time I sometimes think I'm a bit excempt from the "honeymoon" period. I know it's going to be a pain occasionally. But I do enjoy figuring out all the various ways of coordinating a day's meals to make them healthy, filling and exciting (nothing worse than the same thing day after day). Today for lunch I took some of my homemade chicken soup, put it on my whole wheat corkscrew pasta and some saltines. Dinner will be breakfast (LOVE breakfast for dinner!). I've been alternating vegitarian with meat meals almost every other day. It IS fun!!!:dizzy:

Guess that's it for now... gotta work so I can loaf tomarrow!

Terri :wave:

I went to one of those all-you-can-eat buffet places today and lived to tell the tale! I ended up having a great salad with lots of veggies and fat free dressing, and a baked sweet potato with pico de gallo and corn, and it was enough. And for dessert I had a small wedge of cornbread--it was so sweet it was like cake. So let it be known that it can be done! I'm stunned! Ah, celebrate those little victories!

Usually I walk out of one of those places so stuffed I barely know my name!
:lol:

Lamorgan, my husband is the bookmobile librarian in a rural area. He loves it and is very well-loved by the patrons. He truly takes joy in finding the right books for all those different personalities! It's fun to hear him talk about it. Best of luck in getting the job--speaking of getting a foot in the door--he has a friend there that started out as the janitor and now she's the assistant branch head.

Anybody have any healthy plans for this weekend? We're going to go to the park and hike some trails that we've never done before.

:) :) :)

I start work at 12 noon tomorrow. Now I get to be nervous! ~flower

Don't be nervous, Flower, you'll do great! Just think of all you've accomplished and lived through in your personal life -- and this is just a job! Good luck!

Can't stay, gotta type. Later.

Good morning guys...

It is pouring rain in the deep south :( Which was not on my game plan because today was the first day in almost 3 weeks that I was going to have time to take a long walk. The last day that I had time it was raining also :( So what does that tell you? I have know excuse not to study, HEHE!

Well Took my first test yesterday for the semester. I made a not so cool 78, the class average was a 79 so I don't guess I have alot to complain about but I have two test next week, that I have to make good grades on... 78 isn't going to cut it. I can pull this one grade up but if I blow the other two tests, the tests are just suppose to get worse and worse so, that is a no go!

I have had one day OP this week. I have been a bad girl.. way, way too much fast food. I had Wendy's for the first time in 6-8-10 months. Tasted great going down but my tummy wasn't too happy with me. I have got to figure out a way to slow my self down food wise because with my schedule (none-stop 24/7 for the most part) I just don't have time to exercise but the stress of school has got the hand to mouth thing going. I am taking in way, way too much sugar because I am drinking way way too much coffee and I can't tolerate artificial sweetner in anything hot, it gives me a migraine.

We are getting a treadmill with our income tax money if there is any this year, and that way I can read and walk which should help but when that is going to be I am not sure. Well, I have to balance the check book, pay some bills, clean some house and study so I had better depart from the computer for the time being.

Hope that everyone is great, Flower congrats on starting the new job.. hope it is grand!

Hugs to you all,
Amy
176/150/130

We had an ice storm here and it was a wild, wild morning out there delivering papers... Had to help daughter since there were power lines down on her route. Just got home, going to have breakfast and coffee, then a long shower. Many surrounding towns have no hydro, so we are so far quite lucky!

At least I have a gas stove, so if the power goes out I can drink tea.

Tonight was to be our Owl Prowl; may have to call and cancel. :(

February has come in with a loud growl!

Amy ~ perhaps you could fill your bag with low-point snacks to have on hand. Those baby carrots are great and no work. You probably don't have time to bake low-fat muffins...

Good luck.

Have a great first day of work tomorrow Flower!

Wildfire; how is it in T.O. today??? This weather is attempting to mess up my weekend!!! Argh!

Off to eat.

Bye.

Lois