Yes it takes hard work and determination to lose weight... but it seems to be spilling over to other parts of my life - financially (I'm getting organized again), my cluttered business files (got those finally under control today) but I don't know about this dating thing. I'm half tainted from a bad marriage, but every now and then I see some guy and think hmmmm... lately I've been looking to see if there are wedding rings on fingers when I see cute men - could that mean I'm crossing over the line to "thinking" about dating again? I'm not ready. I don't know why I feel that I have to be in prime shape to meet someone again. Maybe it's the process of reinventing myself after a bad marriage, trying to figure out who I am again. I know I was tall and thin and blonde before I married the jerk and I want to be that again. I know I had traveled the world, that I was in love with life, that I liked meeting people, was I naive or will that enjoyment of life come back? I don't think it's necessary to lose weight to date - but we all have to admit that looks plays a part in our attraction to single men right? Why wouldn't it be in reverse? I suppose in the back of my head overweight means and lack of disciple and self esteem - and I lacked both the past so many years of this funk I was in. I'd like to blame my ex, however I don't know why I married him to begin with - my mom was likely right, I had no clue what it was like to be married to a man like "that" and she saw thru him while I dated him for three years. This time I'll be wiser I hope, and there's no way I'll date long term or marry unless it is a very good relationship. I can't believe the toll a bad one can take on a person. For so long I was just tired, tired all the time. Exhausted from dealing with him and life with him. Exhausted when I left him as he wouldn't help financially, still won't divorce without a fight. He doesn't get that I've changed - you know I feel that I have especially in the past few months. I'm DETERMINED to do something different from here on. As Dr. Phil says, if something isn't working, shake up your routine - my routine of sitting around moping and getting fat wasn't working. But this, shaking it up, losing weight, exercising, finding a new home for my boy and I, making lists of new things to do, events activities, hobbies... now this is life AGAIN. Life is too short to not like oneself. It really is. But if weight is a large reason for not liking oneself then it needs to be fixed... sweat, determination, daily tracking, what ever it takes to take back ones life. And be as healthy and happy as possible - and no a man isn't the most important element of a fulfilled life.

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Yes there is a Parents without Partners in a town about 35 minutes away, they have meetings regularly. I found them on meetup.com, I've thought of going for my boy as it would meet regular friends for him outside of daycare and some things we could do today. Thanks