I am wondering if any of you would be interested in mentoring me? ray: I've been off and on now for a LONG time, and when I get back from my vacation, after July 4th, I REALLY want to hit this thing hard again, and STAY on track. Even when I get frustrated & plateau.

And I was just looking for some support / encouragement / accountability from someone that has lived thru it all first hand and come out on the other side (and maintained it!).

I know this is kind of alot to ask - that you take time out of your already busy schedule to help someone you don't know. But I really want to do this! I want someone who can check in on my daily progress, give me feedback, and if I'm MIA for a few days, email me or call me and help get me back on track.

Please feel free to PM me if you'd rather.

:thankyou:

Hi Shyla2001,

I'm not exactly a maintainer because I'm currently re-losing 25 lbs. (plus going for five more beyond that) which I regained after a loss of about 75 lbs. from 2001-2004. But I will certainly give you any advice and encouragement I can, as will many of us here.

I agree with you that hitting it hard and sticking with it is essential, but I'm wondering what you're going to do between now and the start of the vacation. And exactly when you're going to be gone and when you're coming back so I can watch this thread to make sure you get here.

L

Thanks for the response.

We are leaving for New Orleans tomorrow morning, and will be back on the 29th. While we're gone, there will be lots of drinking & eating, but also lots of walking... so hopefully the two will offset.

I wanted to restart on July 5th, just to get thru the holiday, but there's really no reason why I couldn't restart earlier than that. I'd just need to make it to the grocery once we got back in town.

I seem to do real good at getting from 245 or so down to approx. 230 - and then, for whatever reasons, I always gain back at that point. So I'm always losing and regaining the same 15 lbs.

I get tired of journaling my food, but if I DON'T journal, then it's like a free pass for me to "eat whatever".

My exercise is sporadic, at best. I work and have twin two year old girls, so am always tired in the evenings. Ideally, I should get up early & go to the gym before work. But that hasn't happened in years (if ever).

That's kind of where I'm at, in a nutshell. Again, thanks for the response! I'd love any help I can get!

Shyla, as you know this is a great place for support, advice, encouragement and motivation. We're all like one big happy family here. Everyone helps everyone out and has something to contribute to the site - no matter what stage of the game we're at. So checking in to 3FC daily or several times a day is definitely beneficial to remaining on plan and getting that support and accountability you're looking for.

There's the daily planning thread here at the Support section, there's an accountability thread over at the Exercise forum. There's also a bunch of challenges that take place over on the Chick up for a Challenge section. That might be something you'd like to check out as well. Not to mention the individual "Diet" forums and a very active group called 30-somthings and you'd be more then welcome to come hang out in a forum where I spend lots of time - the 100lb club, we've got lots and lots of daily threads all aimed at keeping you on plan and to give you lots of motivation.

So, go take that vacation. Enjoy yourself! And we'll all be here for you when you get back to help you in any capacity that you need. Maybe even start changing up a few things right now and by the time you come back, you'll already be well on your way to getting back on track.

Got back from vacation today. The scale shows 242!~ Eek!! I know I've been slacking for a few weeks (maybe a month?), but its so frustrating how easy the weight comes back, versus how slow it is to lose it!!

So I have to get back on track, which part of me WANTS to do. But the other part of me is dreading calorie counting, sweets deprivation, exercising, etc.

*suck it up*

I plan to go grocery shopping tomorrow, and get some healthy stuff in the house to setup for success.

I wish I was more motivated right now.

Well, if you dread it, it's not going to work. Or, it might work for a little while, but eventually you'll stop doing it, because who wants to do something they hate for the rest of their lives? And make no more mistake - this is for the rest of your life.

So, you hate calorie counting, sweet deprivation and exercise.

Calorie counting - do it for a couple of months. Get a "roster" of meals that you like and know the calorie count of intimately and then just rotate them. I have 2-3 favorite breakfasts, 3 favorite lunches and around 10 favorite dinners. I have the exact same snacks every day. I don't HAVE to count calories anymore because I know the foods I eat regularly everyday are in my daily calorie ballpark.

Sweet deprivation - This sounds weird, but once you stop eating so much sugar and processed stuff, your tongue wakes up to the natural sweetness of fruits and sweet vegetables like beets and sweet potatoes. I have at least 2 pieces of fruit everyday. I also love snacks like baked squash with a tbs of pumpkin butter. Frozen fruit is exceptionally wonderful - especially frozen sweet cherries and frozen mango.

Exercise - I'm not much help here, I hate it too and it's the big area I struggle with. Who knows, you maybe one of the lucky people that "releases the inner athlete" and loves exercise. Wish it were me

I have maintained a 75 lb weight loss for 2 years. I was ultimately successful this time (after 20 years of yoyo dieting) because for the first time - ILIKED WHAT I ATE. Before, dieting was punishment. It was plain chicken breast, broccoli and an ice berg lettuce salad with a squeeze of lemon. It was Snackwell's and frozen lean cuisine and being hungry and miserable. I was always successful at LOSING weight, but I always wanted to STOP and eat normally (which was big plates of pasta, big muffins for breakfast, candy bars and nachos). I was restless, hungry, bingy, miserable.

This time, I really looked carefully at why I succeeded and why I failed. I realized I failed because I hated dieting and viewed it as a short term fix. But...my short term changes NEVER produced long term results. I wanted to be thin forever! Not for a week or 2 months, not thin for a brief time and then slowly and agonizingly put the weight back on while the compliments stopped and friends and family stopped mentioning my weight loss and just gave me sad, sympathetic looks.

So. I needed something I liked. I found out I liked eating healthy. I read a lot of books and I really liked the thought of doing good things for my long term health. Spinach is good for the eyes, blueberries are good for the brain, tomatoes are good for the skin, yogurt is good for the gut, nuts are good for the heart. I knew I liked sandwiches and toast and pasta, so I switched to healthier whole grain versions and smaller portions so I could keep eating what I loved. I used to eat a huge plate of pasta with alfredo sauce, now I eat a small plate of whole grain pasta with home made tomato sauce with spinach (what I had for dinner tonight, actually).

I made big changes...in a sustainable, enjoyable way. I hated being hungry, so now I eat every 2 hours, so I never feel hungry or deprived. I changed and I don't want to go back, I like the way I eat now. I look forward to everything I eat -from my Kashi waffle with natural peanut butter for breakfast, to my roasted pineapple for after dinner snack. I love roasted cherry tomatoes with sea salt, I love sugar snap peas, I love low fat greek yogurt with fresh blackberries, I love salmon salad in a whole wheat pita with sliced heirloom tomato.

I did give up a few foods forever, but that was a personal decision. A lot of very successful maintainers can handle all foods in moderation, but I am not one of them. I gave up fast food, sugary soda, packaged baked goods and candy (except for the occasional fine piece of dark chocolate). I severely limit fried foods, alcohol, full fat cheese (mostly because it's **** on my stomach these days), red meat, ice cream (definitely never in the house!), cold breakfast cereal (definitely never in the house!), cream-based foods and "white" starches.

Loving the food I do eat, feeling so energized every day - why would I EVER want to stop this? I try to make good, healthy decisions 90% of the time. The other 10% is a biscotti with my non fat latte, splitting a molten lava cake in a restaurant with a friend, a decadent spicy tuna roll with spicy sauce or a small scoop of Whole Foods gelato occasionally.

I know I typed too much (I always get so wound up and write little novels), I just want to let you know that it doesn't HAVE to be terrible. What works for me, might not work for you, but the beauty is there is no ONE right answer. There is no one chance and if doesn't work you have to stop forever. You can keep working, refining until you find what will make you happy long term.

I totally agree with Glory. I am trying to lose weight, but I got off the mindset of "dieting". In other words, something with a start and stop date. Something I can "quit".

I am trying to eat better with the knowledge that this is forever. Some days I eat horrible, like when I went to the beach for 5 days. E gads! The fried fish! BUT I realized this is how I intend to eat for the rest of my life. Can I be perfect everyday? Can I never go to the beach and eat fried fish again? No freakin way! No matter how big my willpower may be, I will never be perfect. I will have bad days.

With this mindset, I now know I can never again "fall off the wagon". I can never "cheat". Such a freeing feeling! Most days I stick to eating under 1500 calories a day so I know I'm going to eventually be at goal weight. The days I eat more than that, I know it will only take longer to get to goal. I've accepted that. I didn't "mess up" something that doesn't exsist. My goal is to live like this forever, more good days than bad, and I will lose this weight. It may take longer, but I'm in no rush. The slower you take it off, the more likely it will stay off. This keeps me going in the right direction.

Find what you can live with, that's the key. We are all different. I personally like the eat pre-packaged foods that have the smaller portions and the calories listed right there. I choose snacks I love and that are filling. (Mmmmm. Kettle corn!) and count it into my daily calories. (I've pretty much memorized how many calories are in each item I eat now. I don't have to write it down anymore). I will do this now and forever. Planning is very, very important. Don't leave food decisions till the last minute. Major downfall for me! I had a doctor tell me bluntly "if you are use to eating this much (hands out to form a large plate), start eating this much (hands formed into a smaller plate) and go for a walk everyday". So simple you think it won't work, but it does. We just have to make it something we can do forever, not till "the diet ends". This weight loss journey should never be uncomfortable. I cannot stress enough about that. It HAS to be something you can live with forever, or you will go back to comfortable bad habits. Will it be the most enjoyable thing you do? No, but you decide not to give up bad habits and you live with the consequences. I decided the bad habits, for me, just wasn't worth it. I want to be a normal weight. I WILL be a normal weight, and I plan for it everyday. It does get easier. I do enjoy my food.

Get the eating under control then try the exercise part. Baby steps. This is not a race.

Bad habits are hard to break, but new, better habits will take their places. Trust me, they will.

Heidi

I'll talk about exercising. I hate doing it too. Correction. I hate to THINK about doing it, and I spend many days convincing myself TO do it.

Lots of people talk about motivation. They have it, or want it. Motivation IS important. But motivation doesn't get me to the gym 5 days a week. Commitment does.

Look at it this way. You want a new body, and a new life. What do you need to do to get those things? Do you want those things more than eating too much food or sitting on the sofa?

Another way to think of it is this. There are all kinds of things we do all the time because we HAVE to, not because we WANT to. If I want to keep my house, I have to pay the mortgage every month. Sure, I could do other things with my money, but then I wouldn't have a place to live or be able to keep this lifestyle.

Similarly, I may not WANT to exercise, but I know I need to to keep this new, more active lifestyle.

As an added bonus, I actually often like the exercise once I get started with it. Sometimes I feel great when I'm doing it or when I'm done. I just don't WANT to go, even though it really has helped change my life.

What wonderful tips, advice, and support all around! I just wanted to say to Glory specifically: That was one of the most inspiring (and healthy food hint-filled) posts I've ever read. Thank you for making my evening!

Wow. What they said!

Jay

I echo that. I try to read all Glory's posts because I end up motivated when I didn't know I was lacking!

Glory (as always ) has pretty much said it the way I wish I had.

The only difference with me is that I learned to exercise. I may still be trying to lose a few more pounds but in the end I've managed to maintain a 100 pound loss since December of 2003....wow has it been that long?

Anyway, like Glory says, it's a lifestyle change that lasts forever. I still find that I have to log what I eat or the scale let's me know I'm slacking. As for exercise, try to find some things you like to do - it's so much easier if you enjoy it. I'm partial to bicycling - I'm lucky to live in a place where I can bike outdoor year around, almost. I also love to walk.

Thanks so much for saying this. I have days that I am perfect on my plan.But then I have days that I go out and eat, and pick the things I used to order, like a Ribeye with Fries, and a salad with blue cheese dressing. It is my favorite meal in the world, and I live literally one minute from the steakhouse that makes it for me LOL. I just can't see myself living the rest of my life with out steak and fries. But now instead of going there once or twice a week (yes I was terrible) I go once every month or two. And it is all the more delicious because I don't get to splurge on it as often as I used to.

Anyway, it jus makes me feel good to know I CAN have days that I eat foods that aren't so great for me, but I love them LOL.

Girls, thanks so much for taking the time to reply to this! I didn't exercise today, but I DID grocery shop to get fruits & veggies in the house, and only ate 1491 calories today! :clap:

Glory: I probably DO need to work on finding healthy food choices that I like! Thanks for emphasizing that for me. Because you're right - If I hate it, I'll eventually stop doing it.

Wyllenn - I like your post re: the exercise. Like comparing it to paying your mortgage. That makes sense.

Again, thanks for the encouragement ladies! It means alot!