How about this thread?

http://www.3fatchicks.com/forum/showthread.php?t=68059

SuB, that IS an interesting post by Meg re maintaining. I think the degree with which you must "obsess" (i.e. count calories, turn down "bad" foods, exercise) depends on the results you're after. If you want to live life with not a single spare pound of fat, then you must be EXTRAORDINARILY vigilant bordering on the obsessive (as some choose to call it). If you're happy being a healthy weight but you may have some "problem areas" that dont look so great but dont really affect your health overall, then you can be much less vigilant and less austere (i.e. you can eat "bad" things within MODERATION, you must still exercise but it need not be for hours at a time nor every single day). However, I will agree with Meg that you will ALWAYS need to be vigilant to some degree if you want to fend off obesity for good.

Oi for OC tendencies ... I just spent over two hours researching it. I'd say that was detrimental, yup.

Yes, Claudia, we must always keep our goals, and our steps to achieve them, personal. My journey and intent simply cannot be the same as someone who intends to be a fitness model nor the fella who has to lose weight before he can have a hip replacement.

This thread is really thought-provoking. Claudia's post really hit home with me. I think she's absolutely right. It would be great not to have to think about calories -- we'd all love that -- but if we have a problem with overeating, we simply have to focus on it. I tried intuitive eating several times and I love the idea of it but I simply wasn't ready to go there. I needed structure to get me where I need to be, and I'm still working on that.

Sometimes I think this has become an obsession, but honestly it kind of had to. I got to the point where I either kept eating mindlessly or I changed my life completely. This obsession has taken the place of that mindless eating. And thank God.

I'm a bit on the fence about this too. I'm glad that you're developing a mentality of living life beyond just food & dieting, but I also kind of agree with Mami's comments that if you're trying to lose weight, monitoring food and activity levels is just something you have to do with some sort of dedication (w/o necessarily being obsessed) since it's especially hard to be held accountable and figure out what needs adjustment if one is not logging what he/she is eating or doing. I can't even remember what I ate a few days ago, so I can hardly imagine how to fix my dietary & exercise habits just monitoring once a month.

As with mami, I don't intend to sound mean/scolding/nagging, but just putting my two-cents worth. But best of luck in your journey and lookn forward to your future progress and posts, however frequent or occasional they may be.

It is hard to juggle a lot of things. I know that, gamerchick, and I know from your posts that you have some challenges at home and are working on spreading your wings. There are seasons in our lives and I hope that someday you will come back and share with us your newfound independence. The future is bright for you and someday you will achieve all of your goals.

(gee, how many cliches can I pack into one post?)

Ok, dedication and true obsession (to the point to DSM-IV diagnosis level) are totally different things.
If it is just a matter of deciation, then I would say that I think that everyone should be dedicated to their healthy lifestyles, that goes without saying.
BUT, if gamerchick is actually suffering from a true and dehibilitating obsession, then it is probably best for her not to overly focus on calories or weight, numbers in general, but on a quest for overall health in as moderate a way as possible, and with this will come slow but gradual weight loss. If, though, gamerchick, you think that coming to this site is unhealthy for you because it triggers obessive tendencies then I would say, vaya con Dios, but please get some help and try and work on getting healthy in body and mind, and not just getting slim.
I wish you all the best.

good point susan : ) gamerchick, good luck in your quest. Maybe you just need some time out right now from the calorie counting and also to just take some time to focus on yourself mentally. I don't plug in or write my cals down though at a young age I was a calorie counter and pretty much memorized everything so in addition to that, reading labels, etc. I have a very good idea how much I consume in a day. I map out my meals 2 days in advance and this really helps me so much and helps keep me from straying. Not having anything in the house except for on plan stuff really helps me too but I am sure you have heard much of this from the wonderful ladies here.

Before I began my plan, I worked on my mind and on myslef mentally. (still do). I feel this is key and if I am not mistaken it sounds like you need to take some time foryourself to regroup. : ) you mentioned not wanting to hide anymore and wanting to start living! In regards to the above mentioned, may I offer a few suggestions? things which helped me. Think about making goals or setting dates (only one step a t ime though) for getting out there again. NO matter how small or large, as long as it's something you enjoy and with those close to you that you are comfortable with and enjoy. For example, I started planning something say for a weekend night or whenever, it could be maybe to have a fun get together with a person I hadn't seen in a long time.....having a couple over, etc. etc. you know what I mean, things of enjoyment that maybe at one time you used to do and havn't maybe done in a while. It could even mean getting out there on the road or park and start walking. I so highly recommend it, it so wonderful for the spirit. Though, we all enjoy different things and it doesnt matter what it is , as long as you enjoy it. I feel just these things in themseleves will help very much, it did me and due to the spiritual lift, etc. Just getting out there more this way helped me to stay positive and fight the demons of negativity. ALong your journey, remember that each day is a new day. If you have a bad day , when you wake up in the morning....give that bad day a kick in the butt. Say bye bye bad day, your history! Oh my goodness, I am carrying on and I am so tired tonight so I hope I was able to get across that which I intended. good luck to you, you CAN do this.......

Gosh, Mami, that was a good post. I have nothing to add, but had to post after having read that. I agree totally. Your insight was helpful to me, too!

Thanks slashnl, very kind of you!