Healthy Eating Plan that Works for both Family and Mom!
Hi. I am a SAHM working towards my teaching certification. I am currently about 50 lbs overweight. My kids are not but appear to be on the cusp as my pediatrician says I should put us all on a low-carb regine. He says watching carbs is actually more important that fat or calories. I am not sure I agree with him.
I know since my daughter started eating lunch in school, her appetite has changed (from eating more veggies and fish to junk) and she has put on weight more rapidly. I am trying to reduce the number of times she eats there which is tough because she is a bit of a foodie and enjoys trying new things.
My son is more the finicky eater - can count on two hands the number of healthy foods he will eat.
I have been on every diet in creation. Most success was on WW but it was difficult to maintain and I quickly gained back the 25 I lost and then some.
I have been toying with WW, South Beach and Dr. Oz (he actually operated on my dad - met him last year and he is every bit as wonderful in person as on TV).
My only concern with following a plan is the message it sends my kids - my daughter is already starting to be a little self concious about her weight and I can see her holding back on sports and other things she would just jump in and do.
I know I am so so so TIRED of worrying and focusing on this. I have the pediatrician on one end, my folks on the other with "just don't worry about it" and my spouse who just goes with the flow. With school, the home and working part time (sub teach and market studies), the stress is getting to be too much.
Oh my I am soo jealous. I'm sorry that your dad needed surgery, but you actually got to meet Dr. Oz!!!! I adore him, in fact I think I may have a little crush on the guy. Ooops.
Anyway, I am the only cook in my home, so therefore the kids and hubby will eat what I serve them. I chose not to go on any "specific" plan, as this is something I plan to do forever and ever. Going on diets like SouthBeach or Atkins, makes it sound like there's a beginning and an end. Which is why most diets fail. What I do is count calories. Now my family does not, but like I mentioned earlier, they've got no choice but to eat what I serve. I make delicious, nutritious food. I don't think my family feels deprived at all. We eat mostly lean proteins like non fat yogurt, white meat chicken, fish and soy products. We also eat tons and tons of salad and veggies. The key for my family was for me to find healthy stuff that is just as delicious as the other stuff I used to serve. And I think I have. I'm always experimenting and tweaking to find out what works best for us.
I also emptied out the house of all junk food. It was not doing anybody any good. It really was the only way that I was able to gain control of my poor eating habits as I started out on this venture. I have since gained control and every now and then will buy a small package of cookies or something for the kids. I don't want my kids to feel deprived of an occasional treat. I have heard horror stories of kids who were deprived and restricted too much and wound up being obese in adulthood because of it. I had to stop baking because it is much harder for me to resist homemade stuff then the packaged stuff. They have also learned to like healthy treats such as non-fat yogurt with a little crunchy cereal in it. Cut up veggies with hummus for dipping. Bananas or cut up apples with a bit of peanut butter. Sugar free pudding cup with a squirt of fat free whipped cream and berries. Fresh sliced pineapple.
You said you are concerned with the message you would be sending your daughter. I can't think of a better message to send her then by eating healthy food. I really can't. My husband has lost over 25 lbs without even trying. My kids are older already. 19, 17 and 15. I only wish I would have made this lifestyle change earlier so they could have been receiving the right message all along. I promise you, your family will adjust just fine and they will thrive. Good luck.
Last edited by rockinrobin; 02-04-2007 at 11:43 AM.
Reason: major typo
I am with rockinrobin. I am the cook, and what I fix is what the entire family eats. I am a firm believer that you cannot decide if you like something without trying it first--and one bite is not sufficient. Three bites minimum (and they have to be "real" bites!). Sure the kids can still be a bit finicky, but they know that they have to eat what is served--I will not make a separate meal and they've never suggested making something for themselves. I think that comes from a lifetime of sit-down family dinners. Every night. All of us at the table together. No arguments.
I do not buy any junk food. I do not buy processed foods. Sure I still buy cereal for the kids that probably isn't the best choice, but DD has decided on her own to eat raisin bran. DS likes just about anything, and I buy the lower sugar cereals for him. Sometimes DD will eat dry cereal as a snack since I don't buy crackers or chips any longer. I try to keep on hand foods that they can easily grab if they are hungry. DS loves yogurt. Both appreciate a good apple.
My DS (age 12) actually appreciates my changes. He even has learned to eat his veggies without any kind of dressing on them (DD likes ranch on her broccoli still). I do believe that most of the "education" about eating healthy did not come from me. They don't like to listen to Mom, but if their teachers mention something, they do listen. In PE classes, they have had to learn about nutrition, and they do believe it. DD has gone to a personal trainer (she's 16) and she understands right and wrong choices for herself. She's gained a few pounds lately (after losing them last summer) but she understands her problem--her freedom. She has a car now and can stop and buy fast food when she feels like it. She knows it isn't the best choice, but she has to take care of that herself.
I recommend you hop over to the Whole Foods area. Look at the list of Super Foods and try to incorporate more of those foods into your diet. Make small changes like whole wheat for white bread and pasta. Get rid of processed foods (don't buy it if the label says "enriched" or "hydrogenated"). Be leery of high fructose corn syrup if it is one of the first few ingredients (or don't buy it at all if it is listed).
I agree with you that carbs are not the problem. It is the type of carbs. An apple is full of carbs that are good for you. A pastry is full of carbs that are bad for you. It is a matter of finding the good foods over the bad foods. It takes educating yourself. Personally, I count calories (for myself) and watch the fat content of everything (for the whole family). Because I count calories, I watch my portions and it's funny--the family kind of automatically follows suit.
I second and third what Robin & Allison have said. I have two DDs, ages 12 and 7. They eat what we all eat and they love it. Healthy foods like whole grains, lean protein, and lots of fruits and veggies. They ask for healthy foods because that is all that is offered. There is NO white bread, chips, desserts, etc in the house. None. For dessert almost every night they melt peanut butter and stir in cinnamon then dip in apple and banana slices. Everyone loves it. For snacks they dive into the fruit bowl, or grab a cheese stick or yogurt.
They have also learned a LOT about nutrition just from talking about it with me and they are interested in it. I truly believe that NUTRITION and FINANCE are the two things that are not taught nearly enough. Eating in a healthy manner and feeding your family that way is as important as teaching them any other basic life skills.
I count calories and try to get all my calories from nutrient-dense foods. I really try to get lots of fiber and lean protein because it keeps me satisfied. The rest of the family does not count calories, but since the only things served are healthy they are all slender and in great shape. We also do lots of physical activities together--biking, hiking, jogging, rollerskating, etc.
It may seem daunting right now, but I think it is FUN. Once you get started, it gives you a total freedom from guilt and a real joy in your health. Just take it slow and begin to educate yourself. Your children need to LEARN to like healthy foods, and you are the one to teach them.
The hardest part for me was letting go of the "entertainment" of food. But for almost two years now, after dinner (and dessert like fruit mentioned above) we all brush our teeth and the kitchen is 'closed'. That's it. And it is not at all hard. As soon as we adjusted to no nighttime snacking we've never gone back. Even when I'm really struggling and overeating and eating out or eating junk, we do not eat at night. That was actually a really easy adjustment.
Anyway, I just want to encourage you that it can be done, it is not that hard, and the rewards are MORE THAN WORTH IT.
Thank you. I feel better already. I think my next move is to create a list of 5 healthy breakfasts, lunches, dinners and some snack options and keep it to that. I was buying natural PB and all juice jams when my mom, who is unfortunately my biggest source of sabotage, brought regular stuff.
The weight talk of my daughter really set me off - that and reading that schools were reporting on BMI (without offereing any solutions, keeping the poor food in the cafeteria and cutting back on recess/gym). So many mixed signals out there that just add to the problem.
I do think you are all correct on the whole foods approach. Probably cheaper as well in the long run.
Yes - Dr. Oz was amazing to meet in person. And after 8 hours of surgery, he looked fresh as a daisy. It was unreal. He signed all our copies of You the Instruction Manual (my dad's read, "To a guy with a big heart - and I ought to know."). He is very competent and has a great bedside manner. My dad got him through luck of the draw at Columbia - before that my mom had never heard of him.
Everyone has made really good suggestions for practical ways to accomplish this, and I'm with them on those suggestions.
But I also wanted to address this:
Quote:
My only concern with following a plan is the message it sends my kids - my daughter is already starting to be a little self concious about her weight and I can see her holding back on sports and other things she would just jump in and do.
I think the message you send her will depend entirely on how you approach it. If you come at it with the attitude of "We need to lose weight to look good and be acceptable", then yes, she's going get even more self-conscious and develop further issues with weight/self-image/self-esteem/food. But if you approach it as "We aren't healthy, and I want to live long enough to watch my grandchildren grow up, and I want you to be healthy enough to enjoy your youth" etc., making sure she knows you're not doing it because she's not "pretty enough" or "thin enough" or all the messages gods know we get plenty of from the media, I think she'd take it much better. You can give her the message, instead of "You're not thin enough and I want you to be thinner", that "I'm concerned for your health, and this is going to make you healthier. If you'd been prescribed medicine from a doctor I wouldn't just sit around and let you decide if you wanted to take it or not; this is the same thing." How can she argue with that?
Which is why I'd suggest not doing a "plan" or "diet", because those signify, as someone else said, a beginning and an end, and their goal is always weight-loss, and not specifically healthy eating. Learn to cook good, healthy foods for your family. Teach them to eat them. They'll be the healthier for it, and you'll probably all lose weight.
Echo everyone else, dont "short order cook" for anyone. Empty the house of junk food completely. Treats are acceptable as an occasional thing. If we go out to dinner at spaghetti factory - we have the ice cream that comes with it, etc.
My daughter (3) is right now using food as a power struggle. So we dont make her "try a bite" because that was resulting in failure and more power struggles. I put a variety of healthy food on the table, she serves herself, if she eats she eats, if she doesnt there are no "something elses" later. No one will starve from not eating dinner. We keep her dinner plate around until bedtime, if she is hungry later she has the choice of finishing her dinner or not.
Snacks are not bad for a child (or an adult). Limiting the NUMBER of occasions she eats shouldnt be the goal. But only have healthy snack choices around. And since school lunches have had a negative effect, start packing her lunch. School lunches are horrendous nutrition wise.
I wouldnt go LOW carb, but remove all the unhealthy carbs from your house. White flour, white bread, white potatoes. VERY limited sugar. I am not an advocate of using Artificial sweeteners for kids ..now is the time to help them learn what good food tastes like with out all the crap. Dilute their juices, and only use 100% juice. Soda out of the house.
Serve a moderate portion of whole grains with the meals and that is healthiest. Too low carb is not healthy for growing kids.
At this age I wouldnt talk about WEIGHT at all. Talk about the health benefits of real food, how there is more energy to help them play, and protein to make them strong. How junk food can make you sick and sluggish. Focus entirely on how good food makes you feel. Have them help you explore new foods and try to make a game of it. If they are internet savvy have them look up what nutrients are in a food and what those nutrients do for them. Get them INTERESTED in nutrition - the weight will follow.
Dont talk about your own weight or their weight at all.
Ennay, Excellent advice. I totally agree with every word you wrote. I would only add that you can skip the juice entirely and go for the fruit. We do EXACTLY what you do with the kids food. It's what we've always done. They can eat or not, and we don't limit quantities ever. But we only offer healthy options. If they don't want to eat a meal, then we save it and they get the same thing later. Eventually, they get hungry enough and they eat. And guess what? They like it! I also limit snacking near a mealtime, so they are more likely to be hungry for the meal. Because we've always done this, my kids have eaten a HUGE variety of fruits, vegetable, whole grains, etc. I can honestly say they are the least picky food eaters of any children I have ever met. I truly believe this is because of TRAINING and ENVIRONMENT. Being a picky eater is NOT genetic.
Oh, I'd also like to add. I come from a very large family. About half of them are OBESE. The other half are not at all, even slightly, overweight. Across the board, the obese family members are THE PICKIEST eaters, and the family members who are not overweight are the least picky and eat the largest variety of foods.
Healthy Eating Plan that Works for both Family and Mom!
