I've met people with all sorts of eating styles who believe it's approprieate to comment on other people's food choices, including a vegetarian dorm-mate who baad, or mooed or clucked whenever she saw anyone eating meat (Yes, I know meat comes from animals, you don't have to make animal noises or tell me I'm a murderer, as I eat).
Most of the really rude stuff (in my experience) tends to come from adolescents and very old people, but no group is exempt. I'm an omnivore, but I eat a lot of exotic and unusual foods. I get teasing and get commentary from meat-eating AND vegetarian friends and even strangers for "eating weird ****." When I worked in corporate cubicle land, I can't tell you how many times I heared, "Ewwwe Gross!" of "What is that?" And I'm not talking about mystery casserole concoctions, but even only mildly exotic fruits like Ugli fruit (I admit the peel is a bit odd looking, but inside it looks like a grapefruit or an orange, how exotic is that?).
I'm not even exempt. I do participate in the teasing of a friend who we call a "baconarian," (we coined the name, because she eats no meat or fish except bacon and surimi. The only meats she will eat are crisp bacon and on very rare occasions imitation crab meat - and her love of bacon borders on the unnatural). Even if it weren't for the animal products, it seems a shame to call anyone as veg-phobic as she is a vegetarian (she's essentially a carb and preservative junkie).
But when you're a baconarian junk-foodie like my friend or a weird-****arian like myself - you learn to laugh at yourself and to tune out any of the unwelcome commentary.
You can speak up if you find it rude, and people who care will change their behavior - but people who don't, won't.
Yea I'm a preferred vegetarian. I can tolerate tuna and chicken without gagging... anyways, long story as to why i even bother with that. I was completely vegetarian for i forget how many years off and on and my own mother kept going on and on about how goood this steak is and how much she wished i ate meat because this hamburger is the best and really i've gotten this all my life (and still do). I've hated meat since i was 3 and she's shoved it down my throat until i realized i had a choice in what i ate. I never really handled it well. Sometimes i would just eat whatever she was eating just to shut her up even though my tastebuds screamed at me, "what the fudge are you doing?!" and I've gotten the same thing from almost everyone I know. I've always been the odd one out because I just didn't like the taste of meat and never had. I've even been called a mutant, an affront to nature... alien. I can't be human if I don't loooooooooove meat. I don't understand the world and I've lived in it a good 25 years.
I've been a lacto-ovo Vegetarian for a little over a month now. I have ZERO cravings for meat. I have nothing against people eating meat. I do have a problem with my Dad laughing at me and making constant comments and jokes about my new lifestyle choice. He thinks I'm completely wrong, and even a bit crazy. I usually just ignore it... but there ARE times when I'll snap at him because... well... it is upsetting to not have the support of one of your parents. He thinks it's a phase. Maybe it is... but doesn't mean it's bad or something to make fun of. I'm doing it for health reasons... not for the animal reasons... but... he just doesn't seem to get that either. URGH... just kind of annoying.
And now my mom is trying to convince me to eat meat again since I'm going to start running. The problem that she's bringing up is JUST protein. They're called legumes mom. I'll get plenty of protein.
People are extrememly insensitive. Not only to vegetarians but also other ethnic foods. I am greek and a vegetarian so the comments I have heard are insane. I also have many Indian friends who get the same thing for their dishes and eating habits.
My whole family eats pretty much the same way so I never had problems from them but my co-workers were a whole different story. I remember I once made a dish with lentils and rice and this woman at work almost died when she looked at it. She thought I had mixed lard into the dish to make it stick together????? All I did was boil the rice and lentils, drain and then added sauteed onions in olive oil. Four ingredients lady and I can spell them all out too!
I think people who are educated on the subject are more understanding.
I don't understand it either. I thought what you ate was a personal matter, but a lot of people don't have such boundaries. When I went vegan, every member of my family acted like they needed my approval--probing for my reasonings and arguing about it--when I never even brought it up to them. I just quietly did it on my own. My mom tries, but can still miss the mark and act like I'm just on some really restrictive diet. She also told all my relatives about it without my consent (the joys of gossip.) They just made the whole transition stage very stressful for me, and I suffered heavy anxiety issues partly because of it (went to the doctor numerous times thinking I had a host of other ailments.) My father's the worst, and just outright disrespectful. Even though we're not on speaking terms, he tells me all the time to eat meat. Normally I ignore it, but last time we got in an argument I completely snapped and told him never to talk to me again (extreme yes, but we have issues.) He's very set in his ways and difficult to deal with. Basically, I feel the complete opposite to my family in so many ways. They're all, "What's all this soy--are you a liberal?" haha They'd much prefer nobody had any compassion.
I'm new to veganism but am a bit worried about this. So far I've told no one about it. just quietly doing my own thing. It's hard because I am excited about it and want to talk to otehrs (not to try to persuade them to do it just to tell them why I am doing it). I don't have issues with other people eating meat but know I am going to be challenged for my decision. I guess that's what bothers me the most. Knowing that I will have to defend a personal decision. I could see if I launched into a tirade on why they are wrong for eating meat (which again I don't think they are) but even saying nothing of the sort as soon as people know I will have to be on the defensive.
Hlthgrl - I understand wanting to talk about it but I think that is where people's defenses go up. Just like when someone changes to let us say whole foods. It IS exciting but when you discuss it with people who are still eating what you no longer do it comes across as preaching despite your best efforts. When I was vegetarian years ago, I totally downplayed it, and actually redirected conversation when people asked why. Most people just said "that's cool" and expressed interest in what was on my plate as I usually cooked separately for myself and I am a good cook You may find it much more enjoyable to discuss your new lifestyle with other vegans.
This was a big problem for me while I was a vegetarian last year. It's why I gave it up -- judgment and lack of support from nearly all of my friends, being asked to justify myself constantly, and so on. My mother pressing meat at me, and when I acquiesced to fish, serving fish at every meal and forcing me to eat that (and then seafood).
"I don't know how you can afford to not eat meat," she once said. "What do you mean?" I asked, completely confused. It turned out that she considered "vegetarianism" (really pescatarianism at this point) a privilege of spoiled, rich brats like me... who could eat seafood every day. Of course I set her straight immediately.
Right now, I'm eating up to one serving of meat a day -- grilled chicken, without exception -- in order to get the most protein and the least fat and sodium as possible in my school dining hall, where all the vegetarian and vegan protein sources tend to be either boiled & tasteless, or drowning in curries. I try to get the rest of my protein from lentils, chickpeas, tofu, etc. Dairy is gone for good, eggs are rare, and I'm back to being 75%-80% plant-sourced in my diet.
When I cook for myself (rare though that is), I only prepare vegan dishes. When I graduate and get off this meal plan, I'm fairly sure I'll be an at-least 95% plant-source omnivore -- for weight control purposes as much as anything else.
But I hesitate to ever define myself as anything again. It's so much easier to not tell people what you won't eat -- choose what you want, for the reasons you want, and they're likely not to notice at all.
Last edited by lackadaisy; 02-07-2011 at 10:12 PM.
Comments will lessen with time. After 20-odd years of me being veg*n, anyone who matters to me has long since accepted my eating habits and general beliefs about how what we eat impacts the environment. They've heard my diatribes on animal welfare issues and global protein politics, and I've heard all their opinions on how meat is essential for survival (except I'm still kicking). So we've agreed to disagree and it's all good.
Serbrider: check out the No Meat Athletes online. It's a bunch of veg*n runners and they sell cool t-shirts!
I understand that Tommy. Actually thank you for reminding me. About two years ago a friend decided to become vegan and I was that person feeling defensive about what I was eating When you are on the other side you feel differently I guess. I haven't discussed my dietary changes with anyone yet and unless I have to I suppose I won't. If asked about it I can talk about it but until then it's best to keep quiet. With the exception of my one vegan friend no one else Ikow is vegan. Challenging sometimes to have no one to chat with or talk about dietary ideas or struggles with.
Ooooh, I am so glad I found this post! I UNDERSTAND ALL OF WHAT YOU GUYS ARE SAYING!!! Hi guys, I'm new to the boards and I'm a veggie, currently on the road to being a Vegan
It is so frustrating to hear people's side comments about things, but I guess it's something we have to put up with until the masses figure it out.
Shanigans- I had the SAME experience at my favorite Thai place with my pad thai noodles. One day, a different cook was there and all I tasted in my first bite was FISH! It was so gross I couldn't eat it. I told them the same thing (to advise people there is fish oil in it), and they said "fish is vegetarian." Soooo, yeah... Also, i have the same theory as you. I don't talk about my vegetarianism/vegan lifestyle in front of people while eating. Even if the people asking are close family members or friends or new people i have met that want to genuinely know, I believe that while somebody is chowing down on meat, they are defensive, even if only subconsciously.
YES- PREACHY VEGANS/VEGETARIANS. I totally get annoyed with this too, so therefore most people don't even know I'm a Veg until they are around me eating. I do believe in education about the whole matter, but not in a preachy way. Heck, i don't like preachy people in any form, about any subject. Besides, we (as humans, not anyone in particular) need to not be so judgmental, and it's something I strive for.
Alright, well I am off to my first Bikram class of the day!
I am looking forward to reading more of the threads/comments!
Have a great day!
p.s. My latest annoyed comment after stating I was a vegetarian...
"Okay, but I got chicken too, not just steak why don't you come on over." LOL At least I can laugh. IGNORANCE
I'm more flexitarian now than vegan at home/vegetarian out, but I remember the hazing.
It's dumb, but whatever.
I carried on, and I even went back to flexitarian in 2010 to address some weak iron things the doc wanted me to, but everyone, even the most annoying, got over themselves.
I was veg from 1998-2009. I'll probably go back for another run at it too. I was at my best shape then.
Comments will lessen with time. After 20-odd years of me being veg*n, anyone who matters to me has long since accepted my eating habits and general beliefs about how what we eat impacts the environment. They've heard my diatribes on animal welfare issues and global protein politics, and I've heard all their opinions on how meat is essential for survival (except I'm still kicking). So we've agreed to disagree and it's all good.
Serbrider: check out the No Meat Athletes online. It's a bunch of veg*n runners and they sell cool t-shirts!
I like and agree with what you say! My good friends totally accept me! I also LOVE your profile pic/avatar (whatever it is called!)
You may find it much more enjoyable to discuss your new lifestyle with other vegans.
