I'm bigger than you too.
I doubt very much your son will think that of you. Both of my parents are overweight, my mum wears size 30 clothes, same as me. I don't look at photos or her and think horrid thoughts, she's my mum and I love her! And your son will love you! If you drum into him this is how you expect he'll be when he's older, he will probably start to think that way because you're putting it in his head. And I bet you're not grotesque!
But I agree with the others, you're not eating enough. I practically starved myself last week, because I thought I was eating too much. And got a right telling off in my Slimming Class.
This week I have made sure i've eaten heaps!
You'll get there, i'm only 3 weeks in. I can never picture myself thinner. But I read the success stories of the girls on here and it keeps me going.
You'll be 'reet.