Evil Fitness Instructor

  • Just throught I'd share my latest escapade with you all. As some of you might know my ex is also now the fitness instructor at my gym and last week the sneaky ratbag talked me into letting him sort a fitness programme for me.

    Now just to point out, although I am big, I'm probably a lot fitter than most thin people. I go to the gym 5-6 times a week and I used to ride all the time. But he felt I could do better.

    Now as a point of principle (he's my ex, for pete's sake!) I felt whatever he threw at me, I HAD to do without complaints just to prove that not all fat girls are unfit.

    WHAT A FOOL!

    Give me my due, I did everythng he said and actually ended up doing more than the skinny secretary in my office had managed (she was SOOOO not amused). Go me! Until the next day....

    Since Friday morning, I have been unable to walk, unable to get out of a car without assistance, etc etc. My thighs were so swollen and sore they felt solid to touch and it feels as though I've had cramps in all of my leg. Only today can I actually get down my stairs without taking each step like my granny!

    Moral of the story? Gonna do exercise, don't get your ex to do your programme!


  • It was good to see when the fit club was on tv the instructor admit that he used to think fat people couldn't be fit but now he had changed his mind.
  • Oh you poor thing-made me smile tho'
    Just breaking my lurking habit to say I couldn't agree more about the fat & fit thing. When I started at the gym I used to be so in awe of the slim ladies in their colour co ordinated thong & bra tops who never broke into a sweat. However, although still far from slim when they started posting the rowing times I was amazed to find I'm faster as well as fatter than them all!
    I'm also a demon bike rider and as for the cross trainer....eat my dust skinny!!!
    I suppose you don't get fit unless you sweat a bit! I had an ex who was a body builder (yuk, I know but I was just curious...) and gave me such a hard time about my (at that time reasonably slim) figure. I'd never have ventured into a gym with him. You may be in pain, but hey, he never needs to know.
  • the skinny brigade have no stamina as there body has no standby energy to take from hence no stamina and damned little energy
    kirsty
  • Have you guys noticed that it seems to be the mega fit guys that like the bigger girls amongst us?

    Just to let you all know I growled at him extensively last night. He knows he's been a bad boy....
  • An update - now that I can do his programme, the evil monster sticks it up a grade!

    He started me off on 15 step ups on each leg, four times. Then up to 25. Then up to 30. Just when I get used to 40 by REALLY forcing myself, he calmly suggests that if I can manage 40 I should have a go at 50......

    Anyone suggest a good way to bury a body?
  • I have an ex who works as a forensic scientist - he tells me that the place to get rid of a body is on the train lines as they hardly ever solve those - lol. Strange thing was that he told me that one day when my husband was p***ing me off - lol.

    As for the skinny, unfit thing - lol. I can back that up. I used to be one of those sickeningly thin people. I was 6.5 stone no matter what I ate. My mum has always been a fitness freak and when I was 16 I went to Aerobics with her. I strode in wearing coordinated lycra and have to admit that I probably looked quite good. I looked around and noticed that there were lots of larger ladies, older ladies in track suits and thought to myself "This will be a doddle". By the end of the warm up they hadn't even broken into a sweat, I was in the toilets, hanging out of the window having a fag and in complete agony - lol. I was skinny but sooooooooooooooooooooo unfit - lol.

    I will always remember something a teacher at school said to me about swimming. It was Swimming Gala and I was competing (God knows why as I wasn't a very strong swimmer - lol). I strutted out in my zip up costume. This particular teacher was fairly large and having to swim in place of one of her students as there weren't enough entries from her class. She said to me "Just remember, Fat floats, Better to be fat than to be an aerodynamic brick" - lol.
  • @ Super. I'll keep that in mind about the train track cuz my husband is REALLY PISSING me off right now
  • Great - I live right next to the railway tracks! Yayy!
  • Who have you got in mind Vasquoy?
  • Hmmm???? I wonder.... Unfortunately if I put the bodies of my ex, my neighbour and everyone who works in my office on the tracks behind my house - they might just trace it to me.... Sigh.

    Actually, I think Evil Fitness Instructor(c) has realised something is afoot. He was hiding in the corner tonight and didn't come out. Do you think the body bag was a bit obvious????